The Scarlet Thread (17 page)

rockin chair near the stov feeding Joshua and

singing Mamas song. I cried. I cud not stop. I just

sat in the warm water and the tears kept running.

Aunt Martha give me a real bed to sleep in and

a room of my own. Joshua slept with me. He aint

never ben in a bed before. For that matter, I aint

never seen one the likes of it. It is shiny brass like

gold with a lacy tent over head. Aunt Martha said

it belonged to Mama before she run off with

Papa. She said her own Papa ordered it and had

it shipped all the way from New York.

I wunder if James ever made it to New York

like he wanted. He mit even be in China by now.

Aunt Martha dont ask me a lot of questions.

And she dont look at me like most foks do. The

Reinholtz were in church today and they wud not

look at me at all. On the way home I told Aunt

Martha Joshua is Sally Maes son. It is half-true.

She cried and kist me. She said she loves me and

I can liv with her forever if I want. She said
You

are not to worry what people say. The truth always comes

out in the end.

I hope this truth dont.

Aunt Martha thinks as much of edukashun as

Mama did. She says I got a good mind that needs

fillin with good things. To that end, she is tutorin

me in reding, riting, and numbers and teachin me

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this life is to know the word of God. Mama knew

the Bible front and back and it did not do her

much good at all. I did not tell Aunt Martha this.

I wud rather eat stones than hurt her feelings.

Life does that easy enuf as it is.

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8

state fair with its carnival atmosphere, but here few people were

over the age of thirty and everyone dressed in suits.

Big booths lined both sides of the carpeted aisle. Videos of new

games were going. Neon and vibrant-colored cartoonlike artwork

was everywhere. It was dizzying to the eye and ear. She saw a

short man wearing funky clothes and glitter-framed glasses talking with several taller men in suits. She could tell by the deference

paid him that he was somebody important in the industry.

Sometimes she could tell who was important, sometimes not.

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He’d looked ordinary enough until he’d left them, then Alex

informed her the man’s company had built a two-million-dollar

studio in his home just so he could work on sound for games.

Someone bumped her, glanced at her badge, mumbled an

apology, and moved on. Everyone looked at badges. Alex could

sniff out sales reps and reporters like a hound in the hunt. Not

that he had to work very hard at it. Reporters from
Game Informer,

Blaster
magazine, and
Next Generation
were fighting to make appointments with him.

Lost in the maze of booths and people, Sierra tried to get her

bearings and figure out how to get back to the Beyond Tomorrow booth. It was almost five o’clock and Alex had told her to

meet him there. They needed to go up to their room and change

for a business dinner. The Beyond Tomorrow booth was near

the center with big television screens displaying Alex’s new

game: Camouflage.

Everywhere she turned she heard computer jargon.

“They’ve got the best FMV in the business,” one man crowed,

referring to full-motion video. Alex had explained to her that with

FMV, actors did the fighting and then the sequences were plugged

into the computer to make lifelike graphics. Companies then used

cut-and-paste methods to stick the FMV on top. She heard people

talking about “texture mapping” and “polygon graphics” and hadn’t

the foggiest idea what they were talking about.

Over dinner, she had listened to Alex talk about his work and

his new game. He exuded confidence as he answered questions

and explained his theories and plans. He held his guests’ rapt

attention, fanning their interest. This was a side of her husband

she’d never witnessed before. She was proud of him, of his obvious achievements and his ability to sway others. Yet she had felt

set apart as well—like some kind of nice-looking but totally unnecessary adornment. After the introductions and pleasantries,

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she sat listening. The conversation went on around her, but

hardly a word was directed her way. Half the time she didn’t

even know what they were talking about.

“Do you play your husband’s game, Sierra?” one of the young

men asked her as their dinners were being served.

“No. I’m not much for video games. They’re too quick and

complex for me.”

Alex laughed. “Sierra prefers physical pursuits, like tennis at

the country club, manicures, and shopping.”

The other men laughed with him. She laughed, too, pretending

to share the joke while doing all she could to conceal the surprise

and hurt she felt at his remark. He said it lightly, as though affectionately amused. Yet she felt belittled.

Was that how he saw her? As a shallow young woman with

nothing important to do?

The thought had plagued her all night and most of the day.

God, I don’t even know who I am anymore.

Ahead of her now was a big screen with vividly colored warriors using medieval weapons to hack at one another. One split

the other in half with an axe, sending splashes of neon-red blood

in a shower. Repulsed, Sierra looked away and kept walking. At

least she knew where she was now. Beyond Tomorrow was

down two aisles to the right.

Alex was talking with two men in business suits, while Elizabeth Longford, Beyond Tomorrow’s hotshot merchandising

director, stood alongside him with a clipboard. The young

woman was dressed in a designer suit of deep green. It fitted

her slender body like a glove. No sign of a single wrinkle or

crease, even after a full day of standing on the floor and talking

to sales reps. Elizabeth’s long blonde hair was permed into

kinked tendrils that tumbled down her back.

Sierra had only met Elizabeth a few times and found her cool

and remote. She was very attractive, professional, and ambi1 2 3

saw Alex talking with her so easily.

“Yes, she’s young,” Audra said that evening at a party. Sierra

stood beside her near the hors d’oeuvres, sipping champagne.

“She just turned twenty-six a few weeks ago.”

Alex and Steve stood not far away talking business to several

sales reps, who seemed more interested in admiring Elizabeth

in her sleek low-cut black gown. The simple, elegant design

bespoke money. Lots of it.

“She graduated from Wellesley,” Audra said, setting her

champagne down so she could put caviar on a small circle of

melba toast. “She took her masters in marketing at Columbia.”

Sierra watched the younger woman move out onto the dance

floor with one of the reps. Elizabeth’s graceful undulations were

in stark contrast to the enthusiastic gyrations of her partner.

“She’s very lovely,” Sierra said, noticing how Alex and Steve

were both watching her.

“Indeed,” Audra said enigmatically. “She knows how to present herself. She went to finishing school in Switzerland and was

a debutante.” She took up her glass of champagne again. “I asked

her about it, but she disdains the whole thing. Family pressure.

Understandable.” She ate the cracker delicately. “Her father is a

descendant of one of the crew of the
Mayflower.
” She looked at

Sierra. “She works very closely with Alex.”

Somehow, Audra’s words held warning. They planted doubt

and fear.

“Do you like Elizabeth?” Sierra asked Alex later in their hotel room.

“She’s good at her job,” he said, loosening his tie.

Hanging up his suit jacket, Sierra waited for him to say more.

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When he didn’t, she looked back at him standing near the windows overlooking the lights of Las Vegas. He was so handsome,

her heart ached. What woman wouldn’t be attracted to him? He

pulled his shirt free of his suit trousers and unbuttoned his collar.

Sierra’s stomach fluttered. How long since they’d come together in passionate need for one another? How long since he’d

held her and kissed her and said he loved her? She loved him so

much. She needed him. Yet he seemed so distant, so distracted.

Whatever thoughts were running through his mind clearly troubled him. Hadn’t things gone as well as expected tonight? Or

was it something else?

Her throat ached. She wanted to say something but couldn’t

trust her voice. They had been fighting so much lately, usually

about the most trivial things. She wasn’t sure what Alex would

do if she reached out to him. She wanted to be close to him again,

the way they used to be when they could talk about anything,

when just being together and touching one another had been

heaven. Now it took all her courage to cross the room.

Brushing his hands away, she unbuttoned his shirt for him. “I

love you, Alex.” He didn’t say anything. He didn’t touch her. But

he didn’t turn away either. When she finished, she looked up at

him. “I’ll never stop loving you.”

Frowning, he searched her eyes.

She couldn’t read his expression. Fear suddenly overwhelmed

her, and she couldn’t even say why.

His eyes softened. Sighing, he cupped her face. “You’ve always driven me crazy, Sierra,” he said, his voice deep and rough

as his fingers stroked her skin. He didn’t look happy about it.

“Te amo muchísimo,”
she whispered.

He loosened her French braid. Combing his fingers into her

hair, he kissed her.

Sighing in relief, she let the passion sweep through her.

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It has been a long time since I wrote in this journal.

I have had little time to do anything over the

past months except complete the work Aunt Martha prepares for me. I am not complaining. She

says she has Great Expectations for me. When I

do well, she is more pleased than I. While everyone else in this town seems to look upon me as

Mary Magdalene still possessed of demons, Aunt

Martha sees me as Pure Delight. It is beyond me

why. I question everything she teaches me. She

listens and makes no condemnations while others

would not even give me the time of day.

Aunt Martha tells me I was God’s gift to her.

She has never been married and therefore has

never had children of her own. Now, she has two,

me and Joshua.

Joshua is growing so quickly. Sometimes I am

afraid. I can see Sally Mae in him. He has her

blue eyes and gold hair. I see Papa, too. But it is

the other things in him I see that disturb me. He

has Papa’s hot temper and Sally Mae’s lust for

life. I love Joshua so much. But I wonder what

he will become.

Everyone in Galena thinks Joshua is my child.

It is well they do. They think less of me, but treat

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