The Publicist Book One and Two (27 page)

“Mac-yyyy, come to bed darling.”

Kate knew the voice; it was Delia. Kate’s hand flew to the doorframe to steady herself.

“Kate, it’s not what you think. Well, it was, but…”

Kate felt her face redden, the anger seethed through her.

“Mac…How could you?”

He didn’t respond.

“You can’t be alone one night, can you, Mac?”

Mac stood in the doorway, saying nothing.

Kate started to cry. He put his hand on her arm. She pulled it away. “Kate, come inside, let’s not do this out in the hall.”

“What? And disrupt your evening with Delia? No, Mac, I have nothing more to say.” Kate turned to leave and then stopped.

“It’s in your blood, isn’t it? This cheating. You can’t even be faithful to the woman you’re cheating with, can you?” Kate’s voice was louder than she’d intended, but part of her didn’t care. It didn’t matter. Nothing mattered. Grace had been right, and God help her, she hadn’t listened.

Chapter Twelve

Kate hadn’t slept much, if at all. The thought about Mac with Delia made her stomach twist. She had wanted so much to believe in Mac, to believe in the person he was trying to be, that she’d been blind to the obvious truth. He cheated. That was Mac’s thing, and the fact that she’d gone off with Nick had probably only pushed him further in this direction. It wasn’t right, but perhaps that’s just who Mac really was. Maybe she didn’t really know him the way she thought she did.

Kate screamed into her pillow. She needed to stop making excuses for this man. Her dinner with Nick had nothing to do with the fact that Mac simply couldn’t be alone.

She looked at her bedside clock. It was seven a.m. Mac was speaking at nine. She wanted to avoid him, at least for now, and she especially wanted to avoid Delia. Kate threw her legs out of bed and decided that a run would do her good. She pulled on her running clothes, twisted her hair into a ponytail, and headed out the door.

The air was cool and dry, and it felt good to be outside. She hoped the exercise would clear her head. It was over. Now she needed to figure out how to deal with all of this once she got back to work.

Whistler! The trip slammed into her mind as she turned a corner. They were flying home together tomorrow and then leaving for Whistler on Friday. He’d given her the plane ticket with a note that read, “Bring something warm. If you don’t, I might be tempted to heat you up myself.” She had smiled reading his note. As she turned another corner, she wondered if she should just hand her ticket to Delia.

…

Kate decided it was time to go downstairs. She checked in at registration to see if she had any marketing consultations scheduled. She was told she didn’t, which was typical. Authors often didn’t care about marketing, just getting published—which was interesting since you couldn’t have one without the other.

“Oh, and there’s a note for you, too,” the young girl who had been helping with registration said. It was a message from Mac. He changed his flight and left right after his talk. That was it. Nothing else, just, “Decided I needed to head back.” Kate crumpled the note in her hand. Suddenly she heard Delia’s voice wafting around the corner. Kate slipped into an empty conference room. The room was dark; she closed the door, sank into a chair, and cried.

Chapter Thirteen

New York was cold and snowy—a far contrast from the sunny, warm weather she’d just left behind. Kate sat in the back of a cab and thumbed through her emails. Nothing from Mac, of course. What was there left to say? Whistler. They were supposed to go the day after tomorrow. She wondered if he was taking Delia instead. The thought sent a searing pain into her heart, and a tear slid down her cheek, followed by another. Kate cursed the crying. She didn’t want to cry for Mac or for what they had. She wanted to call Gracie, but she knew she’d better wait. Though Grace would be kind and understanding, the underpinnings of the conversation would still be “I told you so.” That was the last thing she needed to hear. She knew the odds, and she’d gambled anyway.

For a moment, she considered going home and just working there, but she knew she’d have to face Mac eventually.
May as well get it over with.
The cab stopped in front of MD. The Christmas tree was still in the lobby; she wished someone would take it down. Whatever was left of her holiday spirit had evaporated. It wasn’t a Christmas she cared to remember. Allan’s death. Images of him the last time she’d seen him skipped through her memory. She still missed him every day. Allan would know what to do, and even if she chose not to tell him about Mac (which she likely wouldn’t have), just being around him would have cheered her.

“Kate!” Lulu smiled, “great to see you. How was the conference? I wish I could have gone. I have always wanted to see California.”

The conference was hideous
, she wanted to say.
Aside from losing Allan, the worst time of my life.
Instead, she threw her a shaky smile and said, “It was great, thanks Lu. Say, is Mac in? I need to chat with him.”

“No, he’s gone; he called and said he was starting his long weekend early. He’ll be back next week.”

Giving her space. Of course, that was the best thing. Mac had been through this before. Get distance, then go back and pretend nothing ever happened. She wasn’t sure she could do that as well as he could, but she damned sure wanted to try.

…

Somehow, Kate had managed her way through her first day of being back. But, Thursday dawned before her, and as it did, the trip that would never happen deepened her sense of loss. Grace had called her a few times, and Nick had sent her a text.
Hope you got home okay.

She had responded to neither, though she knew she should. She especially needed to get in touch with Nick, but she wanted to give it time. The last thing she or he needed was for her to rebound on this impossibly kind man. Nick deserved better than that.

The elevator doors to her floor opened, and she spotted Delia waiting in the lobby.
Fuck
, she thought,
the last person on the planet I need to see right now
. Well, not the last, but next to the last. Kate took a deep breath and pushed open the glass doors. The receptionist was gone, and Delia was impatiently pacing back and forth.

“Kate, hello!” she exuded as soon as she saw her. Kate wondered if Delia had known it was her at the door the night she’d been with Mac. She seemed not to remember or she was good at covering. Maybe it was a little of both.

Kate forced herself to smile. “Delia, hello. Good to see you,” she lied.

“Darling, do me a favor. Your receptionist seems to have disappeared, and I desperately need to see Edward. Can you get him for me?”

“Sure, let me go back and see if he’s in yet.” Kate punched in the security code and walked through the doors. It used to be that agents or whomever could just walk right into their offices, but 9-11 and random shootings had put a stop to that.

Kate found Edward’s assistant and told her Delia was in the lobby. “He’ll be back in ten minutes. Can she wait?” the petite blond woman responded in her usual cool tone.

“I don’t know, Sara. Why don’t you ask her?”

“I have to finish this, Kate,” Sara responded impatiently. “Do you mind letting her know?” Kate turned and headed back to the lobby. Sara’s holier-than-thou attitude just because she served “the king” was starting to wear on her. Maybe someone should tell Sara that Edward churned through assistants faster than most people change their underwear. And if she wasn’t prepared to drop hers, likely Edward would be finding someone to replace her soon.

Kate popped her head through the door. “He will back in ten. Can you wait?”

Delia smiled—a broad, seductive smile—the same one Kate had seen when Delia had called Mac “delicious.” No doubt now she knew for herself this was true.

“Of course I can wait for Edward. I mean, who doesn’t wait for him?”

“Right, okay. Well, I’ll let Sara know you’re out here.” Kate was about to retreat through the door.

“Kate, wait a minute,” Delia said, and then in a lower voice, “I need to ask you something privately…”

Great
, Kate thought,
now she was sharing her secrets
. Just what Kate needed.

“What’s wrong with Mac?”

“Pardon?” Kate asked.

“Well,” Delia smoothed out the cashmere scarf she was wearing, “our dear Mac always has a reputation of being, you know, a player. So when we were in California, I decided to, you know, test that theory. I mean look at that man. Really, who cares if he’s married, right?”

“Delia, I’m sorry. I’m not sure I know what you’re talking about.” Jesus, she needed to get out of here.

Delia laughed so hard Kate was sure everyone inside could hear it.

“Oh, Katharine, you’re such a sweet innocent, but surely you’ve seen it. You know Mac and his women; no one has seen his wife in years. Maybe he doesn’t even really have one; maybe it’s all just part of his plan to bed women. Who knows? Thing is,” she continued, lowering her voice, “he’s a bit of a prude.”

Kate frowned. She didn’t really want to hear Delia’s take on Mac, but curiosity beckoned her to continue listening, “He’s what?”

“I practically threw myself at him the other night and he refused me.” Delia jutted her chin out in defiance. “Can you imagine someone refusing me? I mean, let’s face it, Kate. Men generally don’t say no.”

Kate couldn’t feel her knees. “I don’t think I understand.”

“Katharine, really! Do I need to paint a picture for you? What I mean is that our Mac-y is a prude; he refused to sleep with me. I spent the night in his room, and he slept in a chair. Who would have thought this stallion would give up the chance to get laid? I love a good urban legend, and I’m sorry this one isn’t true.”

Kate’s mind raced. He hadn’t slept with Delia. She’d stood there accusing him of being a serial cheater, and he took it, every word of it, and never tried to correct her. Why?

“Delia, I need to go.” Kate vanished behind the door and quickly walked to her office where she shut herself in. Had Mac wanted to end it? If that was the case, why didn’t he just tell her? And how could he have known she’d drop by after he had dinner with Nick? Kate needed answers. She picked up her phone and dialed the lodge at Whistler. Indeed, Mac was checked in.

Kate buzzed Lulu. “Lu, I know I said that I wasn’t going out of town tomorrow, but I am after all.”

“Sure, sounds good, Kate. Is everything okay?”

Kate took a deep breath. “I hope so,” she sighed.

Chapter Fourteen

Kate decided not to call Mac and let him know she was coming. She left on a seven a.m. flight to Vancouver, which would get her into Canada in about six hours, then another forty-five minutes or so to the lodge. Kate hadn’t slept the night before; she spent much of that time trying to understand what Mac did.

The lodge, one of the most exclusive in Whistler, was called First Tracks Lodge, and sat at the base of Whistler Mountain. It had snowed the night before and the trees were heavy. More snow threatened later that day, her driver had said. Kate had barely heard him. All she could think about was getting to Mac.

“Are you meeting people here, Miss?” The driver pulled the van to a stop in front of the lodge and stepped out before she had a chance to answer.

“I hope so,” she said quietly.

He handed her a suitcase. “May I help you inside?”

“No, it’s fine.” For a moment, Kate wondered how she’d find Mac and whether he’d even want anything to do with her. Maybe he was really done with her. Either way, she had to find out. Kate tipped the driver and rolled her luggage inside. A bellman quickly approached her. “Can I help you, Miss?”

“No.” Kate’s eyes scanned the room, no Mac. “I-I’m meeting someone here.”

“Check in is just beyond the fireplace.” The bellman pointed past a large lobby. The fireplace was freestanding and blazing; guests were seated around it, talking quietly. Couples wandered through the lobby, hand in hand. This was truly a lovers’ paradise.

“Can I leave this with you for now?” Kate asked, “I need to wait for my, eh, friend here.”

“Of course.” He pulled a ticket from his pocket and attached one to the bag. “Take this in case I’m not here. Just give it to whomever is at the bell stand, and they’ll get your bag for you.”

“Thanks so much.” Kate took the ticket and dropped it into her purse.

“Oh, and you may want to wait for your friend in the library. There’s hot tea and cocoa in there, if you’d like a little something while you wait.”

Kate nodded and walked toward the library, the knot in her stomach tightening. Mac was probably off skiing or something. It could be hours before he’d get back. Kate’s heels clicked on the grey and tan flagstone as she wandered through the lobby. The expansive space was warm with lots of wood; heavy, oversized beams; and thick leather furniture. She decided she might as well get comfortable. As she approached the library, she saw that it was yet another enormous room with a fire blazing in the freestanding hearth. Wood paneled bookshelves filled one of the walls in the dimly lit room. Several people relaxed in wide wingback chairs. One couple was talking, their heads only an inch or two apart. The woman smiled with that unmistakable look in her eyes: Love.

Kate saw the beverage station and decided to grab something warm to drink. As she walked over, she spotted a man seated in a corner, reading. It was Mac. She froze for a moment, her heart pounding in her throat. The sight of him sent an electric jolt through her, and for a fraction of a second, her mind totally derailed. She wasn’t sure what to do. She could walk over, or she could wait for him to spot her and see if he called her over. That was stupid. Of course he’d call her over. He’d be surprised, or he’d be mad. Kate took a deep breath and walked over. As she neared him, he looked up.

“Hello, Katie,” he said in a low, steady voice. “I’m surprised to see you here.” Truly he was. Mac could feel his heart pounding in his chest.

Kate sat down on the ottoman in front of his chair. “Why’d you do it, Mac? Let me believe you slept with Delia?”

Mac straightened and slipped off his reading glasses. He closed the book he was reading and set the book and glasses on the small table nearby. Kate watched his smooth movements. His fingers stroked the cover briefly. Every move he made was sensual.

“I figured it was best, Katie.”

“Best for whom?”

“For you.”

“For me to feel deceived? To despise you for sleeping with Delia? How is that best?” Kate pushed a strand of hair behind her ear, her voice impatient. She was too old to let anyone decide her fate, least of all Mac. But she was also relieved. Relieved to be here, and most of all, relieved that she was wrong.

Mac looked around. No one was within earshot, and even so, he didn’t think anyone would care. “Kate, I’m not a good man. I know that Nick cares about you…” his voice trailed off.

“I don’t want you or anyone else telling me who I should and shouldn’t be with.”

Mac sighed, “You are stubborn. It’s one of the things I….” He collected himself. There it was again, that urge to tell her it was one of the things he loved about her. “Kate, this whole thing is impossible; you and I both know it.”

She leaned forward. “Yes, it is, Mac. Maybe it’s better if I just walk away, but I can’t, and I don’t think you can either. I don’t want to—not yet.”

“Kate, I think…”

“Mac,” she said, cutting him off, “I love that you tried, however clumsily, to get me to move on, and maybe it’s a better option to end this now. We both know this can’t go on forever, but while we’re in this, there’s something you should know.”

Kate took a deep breath before she continued. “I’ve never felt so loved in my life and I’ve never desired anyone the way I desire you.” Her voice dropped to almost a whisper. Mac loved the sound of her voice, and when she whispered, the only thing he could think about was kissing her until she was breathless.

Mac took her hand; the public gesture surprised her,. “Katie, I…” Mac forced himself to honesty, to tell her that he felt the same way. That he craved her touch and her mouth. That he sometimes wanted to wake her up in the middle of the night just to hear her voice. And, that letting her walk away from him in California was one of the hardest things he’d ever had to do.

“Mac,” Kate smiled, “I think we’ve done enough talking. I’d like to see our room, if the invitation to join you here is still open.”

Mac smiled, a broad, sexy smile. He stood up. “Kate, I want to warn you. You had the last get-out-of-jail free card I’m going to ever give you. If you want to get away or end this I will put up a fight, and I won’t be a gentleman about it. Are you sure this is what you want?”

“Let’s go.”

Mac grabbed his reading glasses and stood up, stopping abruptly. “By the way, how did you find out I didn’t sleep with Delia?”

Kate’s face lit up into a broad smile. “She said you were a prude.”

Mac’s laughter carried through the lobby.