The Protector (14 page)

Fear.
She now feared Dorothy. She feared Dorothy more than she feared for an uncertain future.

Chapter 23

“W
aiting for Ella again, are you?” John asked from the other side of the counter.

Loyal felt his cheeks heat. “I guess it’s pretty obvious?”

“Only to a man who’s done some waiting a time or two for a woman.” With a wink he added, “Of course, the way you’re sitting in front of the picture window like a puppy in a pet store gave me a hint as well.”

With effort, Loyal turned away from his spot, realizing his uncle was exactly right. He had been sitting somewhat like an expectant pup, hoping for a smile from someone special.

Around the small dining area, all the men who’d overheard were grinning, too.

“Don’t fret, Loyal,” Bishop Thomas said with a smirk. “We’ve all done it. Sooner or later each man finds he can’t take his eyes off a woman . . .”

“And it’s up to the rest of us to make note of it and tease him,” Henry said.

“I know I have,” John murmured.

Uncle John was truly a surprise, Loyal reflected. Once Amish, now English, he’d had a successful business in Indiana, then packed everything up and moved out to Jacob’s Crossing just a few months ago.

Now, here he was, owning his own donut shop in the middle of Amish country. Being a part of the network of friends and acquaintances but also not.

And now here Loyal was learning that his uncle had waited on a woman before. “Are you talking about Angela?”

“I am not. I have dated some since she divorced me, you know.”

It felt strange to hear him talk about divorce so easily. Even the thought of divorce made Loyal uneasy. “I’m glad you haven’t been alone.” Then, all the sudden, he remembered seeing his uncle and an unfamiliar woman walking together. “Are you seeing anyone now?”

“No.”

“Really?”

His uncle gazed through the thick glass window. “Well, I suppose I am. Kind of. ” He shrugged, looking completely perplexed. “Anyway, my point is that I know that look of yours. We all do. And you, my nephew, are looking head over heels.”

Though it was on the tip of his tongue to deny it, he sighed. “I guess I have been waiting for Ella. She’s become a
gut
friend.”

“From what your mother has told me, it sounds like Ella could use some good friends right now.”

“Uncle John, do you think it would have been possible for you to have known that things weren’t going to work out between you and Angela?”

John’s expression became shuttered.

Loyal felt horrible. He shouldn’t have brought up the past like that. They all knew John’s failed marriage was a source of discomfort for him. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have pried.”

“You didn’t,” John said. “I was just wondering if I could have known what the future had in store for me.”

Even the bishop was leaning forward, all ears. “And?”

“And, the answer is, I’m not sure.” Picking up a rag, John began to wipe down the already clean countertop. “Angela and I should never have married in the first place. We were too different. It was soon very obvious that I was never going to be who she wanted.” Looking from the bishop to Loyal, he said, “You have to remember, when I first met Angela, I was young. Only eighteen.”

“You’d just left us,” the bishop said.

“I had. It was a really hard time for me,” John admitted. “I had a chip on my shoulder, and was so angry.”

Loyal hadn’t heard this story before. “Angry at what?”

“Angry at the
Englischers
, for not giving me a welcome party I guess,” he said dryly.

“What are you talking about?”

“Leaving the faith had been such a big step for me, I thought everyone would give me slack. But they didn’t. All the men my age just made fun of me when I didn’t fit in.” He rolled his eyes. “And believe me, I stuck out in a lot of ways. I did some really foolish things.” He took a deep breath, then averted his eyes. “I was also very angry at myself. Because I thought I’d made a mistake, but I didn’t know how to fix it.”

“You should have come back to us,” the bishop said.

“Perhaps . . . but even if I had wanted to, my pride wouldn’t let me. I wanted to be independent.” Removing a half-filled coffeepot, he checked the time, poured out what was in the carafe, and started making a fresh pot. “Anyway, it was right then and there that I first met Angela. She was my boss’s daughter, and pretty much the first person who didn’t act like I was a source of amusement.”

“So, she wasn’t a complete mistake. She was the right person for you at that time,” Loyal said.

“In a way, I suppose she was,” John said as he filled a paper liner with coffee grounds. “She made me happy, and I loved that. And she was beautiful—and I was young enough to like that very much, too. But then, well, she realized that I could never be who she wanted; and when I found out she was seeing another man, I realized I could never stay married to a woman who cheated on me.”

“What happened to her? Do you know?”

Uncle John nodded. “I came across her name on the computer when I was traveling here. She’s married and has a family. So I guess she finally did find what she was looking for. ”

“Well, I for one, am glad you’re back here,” Bishop Thomas said.

“I am, too.” He cleared his throat. “Well, this is what I get for asking you a personal question, isn’t it, Loyal? I get nosy, and end up telling you about myself.”

“It was the right time.”

A look of understanding crossed his features, softening them. “I think so.” Then his smile grew wide. “And here comes Ella, walking right by here. And, if I’m not mistaken, I think she just looked in here at you.”

Loyal’s heart jumped. “You think so?” he asked, getting to his feet.

“I saw it, too, Loyal,” the bishop said gruffly. “It would be a mighty
gut
idea if you went out and caught her. You know, before she walked on by and didn’t think you cared.”

He edged closer to the door, feeling like a silly fool. “John? Do you think we have enough in common?”

“I think you two have the potential to have as much in common as you possibly want,” he said. “That is, if you go see her.”

Loyal opened the door and strode out, the men’s laughter spurring him forward.

“Ella! Ella, wait, would you?”

He was coming her way!
With effort, she schooled her features to something a little calmer.

“Good morning, Loyal Weaver,” she said. “Having another donut?”

He looked at his empty hands and chuckled. “Actually, I was so busy speaking with my uncle and Bishop Thomas that I forgot to eat.”

“How are they this morning?”

“They are good. Would you like to go inside for a bit? Or are you off to work?”

“Actually, I’m not working for another two hours. I just was eager for a break.” After quickly debating whether to burden Loyal with her latest news, she added, “And I thought I’d try to find a new place to live.”

“New? What happened?”

“Dorothy, she was very upset about the bishop stopping by. She wants me to move as soon as possible.”

“That’s hardly fair.”

“At first I was upset, but a part of me is kind of relieved,” she admitted as they walked past the library, and then by mutual consent, down a walking path to the Crossing Park.

As the path narrowed and they moved a bit closer to each other, she lowered her voice. “Loyal, I don’t think she’s quite right in the head. Her anger was scary, and I’m afraid that the way she looks at me makes me on edge. I’m now worried about coming home, wondering what she’s been doing in my absence.”

A fierce protectiveness rushed through him. Ella was such a sweet person, he ached with the thought that Dorothy was using those good qualities against her.

“Do you fear for your safety?” he murmured. There were a lot of things he wanted to say. He wanted to promise her that everything was going to be just fine. That he could solve all her problems. But of course, he couldn’t.

“I’m not afraid. Yet.”

“Yet,” Loyal echoed, then, almost without thinking, he wrapped an arm around her shoulders. For a second, she tensed, then he felt the muscles in her shoulders relax, and finally she moved closer to him.

That action filled him with happiness. Ella had been too alone for too long. He wanted to support her.

“Did you sleep last night?”

“Some. Mainly, I just kept going over that conversation, wondering how I could have handled things better.” She bit her lip. “Loyal, Dorothy is angrier than ever.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.”

Dealing with too many emotions to handle both walking and talking, she stopped and faced him. “I’m worried she’s going to ask me to leave the library.” Tears pricked her eyes as she recalled the pain Dorothy’s threats had caused her. “I love working at the library. I love being around the
kinner
.”

“Oh, Ella. I am terribly sorry. We will get through this.” His gaze was sweet as he reached out and rubbed her other shoulder.

“It’s not your problem . . .”

“It is, because it involves you,” he said softly.

Then, before she really knew what had happened, he opened his embrace, and she stepped closer. Then finally pressed her face into the nook of his shoulder.

And sighed as his arms wrapped around her and held her close. Into a very sweet, very comforting embrace.

Another pair of tears trailed down her cheeks, embarrassing her. Well, they would have embarrassed her if they hadn’t been completely alone and her face wasn’t pressed against his shoulder.

“It’s okay, Ella,” he murmured, patting her back slightly. “I promise, I’ll help you make everything fine again.”

She believed him. Slowly, she lifted her arms, too, and wrapped them around him.

Everything she was now feeling had nothing to do with fear and comfort and everything to do with a longing so fierce that it was almost a tangible thing.

This was Loyal Weaver she was embracing—the boy she used to watch from a distance, the man she used to dream about. Loyal Weaver, who to her was always so charming, so handsome, so everything!

She closed her eyes and inhaled.

And then felt his lips brush her brow.

She lifted her head.
“Danke,”
she murmured. “Thank you for believing in me.”

“Don’t thank me for that.” His blue gaze felt like a caress. “I’m glad to be here for you.” His right hand reached up and brushed the back of two fingers against her cheek. “Please don’t cry anymore. I hate to see your tears.”

“I’ll try not to.” Her voice drifted off as his head inched closer. His hand still on her cheek, she felt completely comforted.

Her lips parted. Trying to think of something to say. Something to tell him, about how much he meant to her. About how grateful she was to him—

But then she thought of nothing as his lips brushed hers. As he kissed her.

Ella’s breath hitched. A thousand thoughts ran through her head. But then nothing else really mattered as she tilted her head and kissed him back. Right there. In the park. Surely God was very, very good. If he could make her girlish dreams turn into this reality, then surely He could make anything possible.

Chapter 24

T
he problem with being Katie Weaver, was that everyone always assumed she only wanted something to eat.

“Katie, you must eat your breakfast. It’s getting cold,” her mother chided from across the kitchen.

“I’m not hungry.”

Her mother stared at her for a long moment, then briskly walked over and pressed her palm to Katie’s head. “You don’t feel feverish. What hurts?”

“Nothing, Mamm. I just ain’t hungry.” Before her mother could start fretting about wasting food, Katie scrambled to her feet. “I want to go see Ella today. Can you take me soon?”

“Is that why you are not hungry? Because you’re so anxious to see the librarian? ”

“Ella is more than the librarian. She’s my friend.”

With a sigh, her mother sat down at the table, picked up a fork, and started spearing Katie’s untouched pan-fried potatoes. “I know that, dear. But to be honest, I don’t understand your interest in her all that much. Why does she hold such fascination for you?”

“Because she’s nice. And she loves books, too.”

After taking a few more bites, her mother looked at her fondly. “I suppose that’s enough,
jah
?”

“I want to be a librarian, too,” Katie said, realizing right as she said the words that that was the truth. She loved reading and loved books, all books.

And unlike the people in her family, who were busy, busy, busy . . . Ella Hostetler understood Katie’s need to always have a book to read.

Even if she couldn’t read all that well yet.

“My. Well, I have to say you might have already discovered what future God has intended for you. It seems as if being a librarian would be a wonderful-
gut
occupation for my dear daughter.”

Katie’s heart beat faster. “You mean it, Mamm?”

“Indeed I do. I’ve always thought you could be anything you wanted to be.” She blinked, looking out into the distance. “I had imagined you would take after me, and would want to be a wife and mother. But perhaps there’s a lot of your father in you, too.”

They hardly ever talked about her
daed
. “Daed wanted to be a librarian, too?”

Her mother laughed. “
Nee,
child. Your father always enjoyed a
gut buch.
I suppose you take after him.”

“So, can I go see Ella today?”

“I don’t know, dear. I have a lot to do.”

Looking toward the door, Katie knew where to go next. “I’ll go ask Loyal to take me.”

“I doubt he’ll have time.”

“Why? Is he already out in the fields?”

“
Nee,
he’s working in the barn some. But, Katie, your brother has far more to do than to run you places in the buggy.”

“Maybe . . . or maybe not. Loyal always seems to have time to see Ella.”

“Katie, you shouldn’t gossip like that,” her mother admonished. But after biting her lip for a moment, she said, “But do you think Loyal is fond of Ella?”

“Oh,
jah
!” Katie said, standing very tall and proud. It wasn’t often she knew something her mother didn’t. “You should see them together, Mamm. When Loyal is next to Ella, he stares at her all the time.”

“You shouldn’t say such things. . . . But, truly?”

“Uh-huh.”

Amusement flashed in her mother’s eyes; then with a sigh, she said, “Yes, Katie, you may go ask your brother if he will take you to the library.”

“Danke!”

“Wait!”

Katie skidded to a stop.

“You may go . . . after you eat some of your breakfast.”

Eyeing the plate, Katie grimaced. “But it’s cold now.”

“That’s the consequence,
jah
? Little girls who don’t eat their hot breakfasts must eat it cold.”

With her feet feeling like lead, Katie walked back to the table and sat back down. Another glance at her mother warned her against arguing further.

With a sigh, she scooped up a forkful of eggs. Experience had told her that there was only so much her mother would put up with.

“I
can’t believe you talked me into taking you to the library this morning,” Loyal said to his little sister. “Remind me to ignore you next time you come into the barn.”

Katie fidgeted next to him. A casual observer would think she was ashamed of her nagging. Or perhaps embarrassed to be caught being so headstrong. But he knew better. So far, Katie hadn’t met a situation that could embarrass her. “That’s not very nice, Loyal,” she finally muttered.

For a brief moment, he considered apologizing—but if he did, he knew his tiny sister with her very big mouth would twist and turn his words into something else entirely.

So, he kept on the offensive. “It wasn’t terribly nice of you to interrupt my work.”

She darted another sly look his way. “One day I’ll be old enough to drive the buggy into town.”

“That is true.” Against his will, he thought about Katie growing up. And then, perversely, the idea of it made him sad. From the day she was born, their little Katie had made them all laugh with her antics and dramatics.

As they stopped at a traffic light, she looked at him again. “Or maybe one day I won’t have to drive to the library to see Ella.”

“Where else would she be?”

“Maybe she’ll live closer.” A hint of a smile lit her face. “A whole lot closer?”

“Why do you say that?” Against his will, Loyal felt embarrassment overtake him and his cheeks heat. Just like a teenager!

Surely Katie hadn’t heard about his kiss?

“Oh, no reason . . .”

“You know something,” he retorted. “What do you know?”

“Just that you like her.”

The light turned green and he motioned the buggy forward. Thankful for something to occupy the majority of his attention, he murmured, “Why do you say that?”

“Come on, Loyal. It’s not hard to tell.”

“Because?”

“Because you look at her all moony, that’s why.”

Before he remembered to be far more mature, he snapped, “And just how does ‘moony’ look?”

Katie’s mouth opened, she looked at him; then, surely seeing something foreboding on his face, shut her mouth again. “Nothing.”

“Come now, Katie. Now’s no time to stop. Explain yourself.”

“It’s just . . . I just think when you look at her, you smile with your eyes.”

Loyal swallowed hard. Luckily, he’d just pulled up to the library. No sooner had he halted the buggy than Katie looked ready to scramble out of the conveyance. “Hold, now. I’m comin’ in, too.”

“You don’t have to.”

“I certainly do! How else do you think you would get home?”

With a hand on her shoulder, he guided her through the main doors of the library. Only then did he realize Katie’s arms were filled with three picture books.

A handful of ladies behind the main counter looked up when they entered. Ella was one of them. Her cheeks bloomed bright and her lips parted.

Which only made him think of kissing her again.

“Ella! Me and Loyal came to see you!” Katie said, far too exuberantly.

A few patrons glared at the pint-sized disturbance. “You must be quieter, Katie,” Loyal warned.

“It’s all right,” Ella said as she walked around the desk to greet them. “I’m glad you came here to visit. What a wonderful-
gut
surprise! So, are you ready for stars on your reading chart?”

“I wanted to see you. I mean, we both did,” Katie said with an unusually awkward look toward Loyal. “Are you reading stories today?”

She shook her head. “I’m afraid not.” Meeting Loyal’s gaze, she stumbled over her next words. “Actually, I’m not sure if I’m going to be working here much longer.”

Loyal felt his chest constrict as he saw her lip tremble. “What happened?”

After glancing behind her, she motioned them to the side. “Jayne. I mean
Ms. Donovan
—she was mighty upset with me today. We had to talk. Dorothy . . . Dorothy has been spreading lies about me.”

“Katie, leave us for a few minutes, please,” Loyal said quickly.

His sister froze. “But—”

“Katie, let me visit with Ella for a moment in private. It’s important.”

With a wounded look, she left them and went to the juvenile stacks.

The moment they were alone, Ella’s shoulders relaxed and her bottom lip trembled. “I don’t know how, but I think Dorothy saw us kissing, Loyal,” she whispered.

“How could she?”

“I have no idea. But . . . but she told Ms. Donovan that my morals were loose and that I was losing my apartment.”

“But that’s her doing!”

“I know, but the way Ms. Donovan heard it, Dorothy made me sound like the very worst sort of person. We were just discussing whether or not she wants me to continue here.”

“That’s not right. I’ll go speak with Ms. Donovan.” He paused, thinking of who was to blame. “Or Dorothy.”

“I’d rather you didn’t. This is something I need to take care of on my own.”

He didn’t agree. He wanted to help her. At the very least, he could be by her side when she confronted the other woman.

But he also knew he had no right. “Are you sure?”

She swallowed. “I’m going to go home and talk to Dorothy. Things will only get better once I straighten everything out once and for all.”

“How about I drive you?”

“
Nee,
Loyal. This time I want to take care of myself. It will be better this way.” Reaching for his hand, she lightly squeezed. “So if you could, as soon as I visit with Katie for a few minutes, I’d be grateful if you could be on your way.”

The pain in her eyes broke his heart. “All right, then.”

After two steps toward the children’s section, she stopped. “Oh, and Loyal—”

He searched her face, waiting for a change of heart. “Yes?”

“
Danke
. Thank you for caring.”

“You’re welcome,” he said, though his reply felt completely inadequate. “Ella, I care about you.”

Her lips curved. “I know,” she said before turning away.

Fifteen minutes later, as Loyal held Katie’s hand on the sidewalk toward the buggy, he realized that saying he was sorry seemed terribly inadequate. Ella was so sweet, and had already given up so much for her mother. Now, here, when she was just discovering what a wonderful woman she was, Dorothy was threatening to make her lose everything all over again.

And when they were driving the buggy home, Katie reading her new book by his side, Loyal also knew that he didn’t just
care
for Ella. No, what he felt for her was far stronger.

Fact was, she had already claimed his heart.

“Katie, I do believe we need to go back,” he said suddenly.

“To the library?”

Loyal nodded. “I can’t let Ella solve her problem by herself.” And with that, he turned the buggy and headed back to the library.

He sincerely hoped he wasn’t too late.