The Mourning Woods - 03 (45 page)

“It’s the Freewill,” a female voice screamed. “And he’s carrying victims!”

Or maybe not.

I stopped at the edge of the clearing, not wanting to further agitate the white-robed witch who stood there, arms up in a defensive gesture. Great, of all the various life forms here, I had to stumble upon the magical morons who wanted me dead.

“Relax,” I said, holding up my hands. “We’re all under truce here.” I lowered Ed to the ground. “See, no victims.”

Her eyes then shifted to Sally, still lying over my shoulder. “The beast has turned on his own kind!”

Now others of her coven were starting to emerge and they didn’t look happy. I quickly scanned the area. Where the fuck was Christy? If she was off porking my roommate and I got fried because of it, I was gonna be just a wee bit pissed at them both.

“Open your fucking eyes,” Ed snapped at her. “Stupid is no way to go through life.”

A confused, if somewhat insulted, look came over the witch’s face as her companions began to gather round.

“Way to improve the situation, Ed,” I said out of the corner of my mouth. “Help me with Sally.”

I lowered her to the ground and her eyes fluttered open.

“Where are we?” she weakly asked.

“About to get zapped by the mages guild...you know, the usual.”

I got an eye-roll for that. Beaten to a pulp though she might be, Sally was back in the game. I offered a hand to help her up.

“You shouldn’t have come here, Freewill,” an older witch said, stepping forward. “You are not wel...”

“Sorry, they’re with me,” a voice called from behind her. Suddenly Christy and Tom were there, pushing their way to the front. Tom didn’t look so hot...actually scratch that, he did. In fact, he kind of looked like a boiled lobster. His skin was all red as if he had been repeatedly scalded.

“They’re here at my...invitation,” Christy said to the older witch. “To help...foster...the peace.”

“They look like they just stepped out of a slaughterhouse,” the other witch pointed out.

“Well, you know vampires,” Christy replied in a chipper voice. “Filthy animals that they are.”

“Fuc...” Sally started to say, when I clamped a hand over her mouth.

“What my friend
meant
to say was sorry about that,” I quickly stammered out. “You know us vampires. We just can’t control the ol’ bloodlust.”

A ripple of tension passed through the assembled coven. For a second I was sure we were about to get fireballed. Finally, the elder witch spoke again, “Just because we are under truce, do not think our mission has changed, Freewill. You would be wise to slink back to whatever foul grave you crawled from.” With that, she waved at the others to disperse. She began to walk away, but not before turning back. “The master will hear of this, Christy. You’re playing a dangerous game.”

“Nice to meet you too!” I called after her before turning to Tom. “What the hell happened to you?”

“I don’t want to talk about it. Let’s just say I had one horrific day.”

I raised an eyebrow at that, then gestured to myself and Sally.

Tom just shrugged and replied, “Doesn’t look so bad.”

I immediately had to restrain Sally from rearranging his beet red face. Unsurprisingly, she still had a little fight left in her. “Down girl!”

Ignoring our antics, Christy stepped forward and asked, “What happened?”

“I don’t think we have time for the full story right now,” I answered. “We need to get back and find James.”

“James?”

“One of the few non-asshole vampires I know. He’s one of the good guys.”

“Oh. Sadly, time might be shorter than you think. We were all getting ready to head over to the meeting place.”

“Great, I really need to invest in one of those rugged sports watches.”

“Dude,” Tom started. “Maybe you should invest in a new shirt first. Showing up looking like the lone survivor of a horror movie might not exactly fit the dress code.”

“So says lobster boy,” I shot back.

“Enough,” spat Sally, stepping in front of me. “You two can fondle each other’s balls later. We need to find James before Francois and Turd can convince every creature here to put you on their most wanted list.”

“She’s got a point, Bill,” Ed replied. “Time is not on our side.”

“Agreed,” I said. “Let’s get going.” I took a step and then stopped. “You too, Christy.”

“Me?”

“Yeah...you’ve earned the truth.”

Christy looked surprised for a moment, but then she smiled. “Thank you, Bill.”

“Welcome to the inner circle,” Tom proudly stated.

“Besides, Christy,” I continued, “If this turns into a cluster fuck - which I’m sure it will - they can’t touch you. I’d prefer that at least one person makes it out of this mess alive knowing the truth.” (As idiotic as that truth might be)

* * *

“Bill, are you OK?”

“Just need a minute,” I gasped. Nearly back to our own encampment, I had suddenly gotten lightheaded. The next thing I knew, I was down on one knee.

“What’s wrong?” Sally asked.

“Nothing,” I replied, getting back to my feet. “I’m just running on empty. Francois’s blood has worn off and I lost a ton of my own back there.” It was the truth. Between the fight, the trauma, and the running I had used up everything I had. Now even the adrenalin in my system was fading, leaving me wanting to do nothing more than crawl into bed for the next couple of years. It was a pity that a rest break didn’t seem to be in my near future. If any fighting broke out now, the best I’d be able to do is stand there and let the bad guys break their hands against my face.

I took a couple of deep breaths to steady myself, then turned to tell my companions to keep moving. I saw Tom and Ed exchange a meaningful glance.

“What?” I asked, ready to spit out a pithy comment regarding their sexuality.

“Here,” Ed said. With that, he held out his hand, wrist up.

“Me too, bro,” Tom added, doing the same.

I looked down at their outstretched arms in confusion. “You want to hold hands with me? I’m flattered.”

“Don’t be a fucktard your entire life,” Ed snapped. “Blood. You need it. Go ahead and take some.”

“What!?” I yelled, horrified (partially because I was tempted to take them up on the offer).

“You heard him,” Tom said. “Just don’t tell anyone about this. It would be weird.”

Sally sighed, but then offered her hand too. “Might as well count me in. You’ll get more bang from mine than from the fleshbags anyway.”

I was...touched. “You’d all do this for me?”

Tom just laughed. “Dude, we’re you’re buds...just as long as you don’t make a habit of it.”

“What the meatwad said,” Sally added. “Besides, if you go down, chances are I’ll come tumbling after. We are partners, after all.”

I didn’t know what to say, but I did know what to feel. I was proud as all hell to know them. With them at my side, I could face down every single Turd that life had to throw at me.

“Thanks, guys. I mean it,” I replied. “If I didn’t have enough to go on before, I think I do now. Suddenly I feel a lot better.”

“Are you sure?” Sally asked.

“Well, maybe I’ll still bite
you
...but only if you beg me first.”

“Moment’s over,” she declared with an eye-roll, putting her arm down.

“Aw, you know you will some day,” I joked, right before noticing Christy. She had been watching the whole thing. She actually had tears in her eyes.

“I’m sorry,” she said, in a low voice.

“For what?”

“For
everything
. We’ve been wrong about you. You don’t deserve our wrath.”

“I’ve been telling you that, silly,” Tom said fondly.

“I’m going to tell Harry that when we get back.”

“Are you sure?” I asked. “He doesn’t seem like the type who’ll take no too kindly.”

“I’ll be OK. He needs to know that you’re not going to be our downfall. The prophesy must be wrong.”

“Thanks, Christy. I mean it.” A smile crossed my face and I really did find I had the strength to go a little further. I started to walk.

“One more thing, Bill,” she said.

“What?”

She turned to Tom instead. “Hon, remember that warding powder I gave you for your apartment?”

“Yeah.”

“Be sure to vacuum it up before you let Bill step over it. It...kinda would have...vaporized him.”

“What?” I shouted.

She smiled sheepishly at me. “Technically our truce was only for the duration of this conference.”

* * *

The vampire camp was mostly deserted. I didn’t see any of Francois’s goons, which was good. Unfortunately, I also still didn’t see Nergui, which was not so great. I would’ve felt better if we had him there backing us up, just in case. But, oh, well. I knew this wasn’t going to be easy.

We decided to take a few minutes to freshen up. Tom was right about showing up looking like the last survivors of a
Jason Voorhees
massacre.

I had just barely put on a fresh shirt when I heard sounds coming from outside. I peeked out and spotted some figures walking in our direction. It was James and his people. Nergui was by their side.

“Thank God,” I said, stepping out to meet them. A smile broke out on my face. “You have no idea how glad I am to see you.”

James, however, didn’t return my mood. “Alas, I wish I could say the same, Dr. Death,” he said with a nod to his people. They immediately moved to surround me. “For now, I am afraid that you are my prisoner.”