The Living Room (11 page)

Claire heard the conversation from outside the doorway and realized that she now had to talk to the parents, instead of trying to convince Daniel otherwise once they were at home.

The ride home was quiet. She thought about the sudden uncertain future. Daniel pondered the recent past. Could it be possible? And should he share with Claire what might have happened? Or was it just a crazy theory brought on by exhaustion and medication? He elected to keep the promise made in the prayer.

Back home, he was exhausted and headed straight for his room.

“There’s no one here tonight; why don’t you sleep upstairs?”

This stopped Daniel cold in his tracks. He turned to her wide-eyed. “Do you think it’s that serious?”

“No, I just meant that the view might be nice after a night in the hospital.”

He nodded and let her off the hook with a tired grin.

“Are you sleeping downstairs?” he asked.

“Yes.”

“Then I like the view better down here.” He winked and continued toward his own bed.

It was a quiet evening. Both Daniel and Claire were consumed with concern and self-reflection. Neither was interested in communicating tonight.

Sunrise reminded Daniel to ask Claire about talking to Ryan’s parents. She agreed and offered to send Brenda over to check on him.

“No, I’ll be fine, but having Ryan around would be good company.”

Once she left, he headed for the bathroom to brush his teeth. Halfway there, it happened. He was hit with a pain like a hammer to the temple and gripped his head, struggling to see. He fell to the floor and, though dizzy, never lost total consciousness. He was left staring up at the ceiling and wondering what had happened. He glimpsed back at the bed and his trail to the bathroom, curious if he had stood up too fast, or hit something he was unaware of that blocked the short path. He was able to rise again, slowly this time, and made it to the washroom.

In front of the mirror, he struggled to regain visual focus. He inspected his head for marks and cringed in pain with every touch to the forehead. This type of pain was unfamiliar to him, though he had been victim to colds and migraines before.

While inspecting his head, his eyes locked in on the mirror, and he began to open his shirt. Shock set in as he discovered his worst symptom so far. A small lump on the side of his neck became more noticeable after each blink.

His first instinct was to cry out, “Claire!” Then he remembered she had left. He went for the phone.

“Hello, is that Brenda? Is Claire there yet?”

“No, I’m sorry, Daniel, she’s due in anytime. Would you like me to give her a message?”

There was silence. Daniel was hit again, not with pain this time, but with another flashback. He envisioned the first time he saw Matthew getting out of his parents’ car, and the noticeable lump on the side of his throat, not unlike the one he now possessed.

He also remembered that David was much better when he left than when he had arrived, that his headaches disappeared the morning after he had touched David’s head during his prayer.

“Is there a message?” Brenda asked him again.

“No, just tell her I said hello, and I’ll be here when she gets home.”

His message made no sense, but he had lost his senses temporarily. Hanging up the phone, he returned to his bed in shock over his abnormal discovery.

Most of his day was spent in self-debate about telling Claire what he had done, the things he had said, and what he believed might now have materialized in him.

He needed a familiar voice and reached for the phone.

“Hi, Nancy, it’s Daniel.”

“Well hello. I was beginning to worry about you.”

Daniel chuckled slightly at the irony of her comment.

“Did you sell the place?”

“Not yet. But I’ve got a realtor working on it, and I may just leave it in her hands.”

“You don’t sound very good. Is everything okay?”

There was a long pause as he thought of what to say, but he didn’t want to alarm anyone back home. “Yeah, I’ve got a cold, a real bad one. As soon as it’s better, I’m flying home.”

“Is there anything I can do for you from here?” She could sense fear in him. She hadn’t heard it in any of their conversations before.

“No, I’ll be fine in a couple of days, hopefully. Just tell Art that I called, and I’ll be home soon.”

“Will do. Take care of yourself, Daniel. We’re all looking forward to seeing you again.”

After another pause, he responded, “I’m excited about coming home. I’ll see you soon.”

He hung up and concern engulfed him once again. He retired back to bed and waited for his nurse to arrive.

He awoke in the early evening to the sound of traffic arriving and rushed the best he could to better his appearance and wait by the door. Through the window, he could see Claire step from her vehicle and walk around it, toward the back of the ambulance. It was the one equipped vehicle that he had become conditioned to dreading, but this time it brought good news.

As the ambulance doors opened, he could see Ryan on a stretcher in the back, grinning from ear to ear. The thought of visiting with Daniel again was just as exciting to Ryan as it was to his host, who walked out to welcome him. “Hey there, buddy. I’m glad you could make it!”

Claire seemed surprised, and unimpressed, that he had come outside to greet them.

“Daniel, you should be resting. It’s cold out here. Come on back inside, and you two can visit upstairs.”

Daniel returned to the doorway but waited for his company to be lifted in and taken up to his new room. He followed close behind, chatting with the child as though they were old friends. The company helped distract him from his mysterious ailment and the promise of secrecy that he had made in prayer.

Ryan was moved from the stretcher to the bed and his body cast was removed for comfort. He instantly stared out the transparent walls at the setting sun and thanked Claire for arranging the stay with his parents.

“You’re welcome, Ryan. I promised them you were going to get your rest while you were here. So you two can get reacquainted
quickly
for tonight, please, but let’s make the visiting start tomorrow, okay?”

“For sure,” Daniel agreed. “The view is a little better than at the ward, wouldn’t you say, kiddo?”

“Definitely.”

They kept it short to appease the overseeing nurse. Daniel promised to come up and see him first thing in the morning. He left Claire to prepare her patient for bed and returned to his own for the night.

Chapter 12

Claire awoke to the sounds of laughing and intermittent coughing that journeyed down through the vent. She was pleased to hear the joy in their voices but still concerned about Daniel’s well-being. She would have preferred to find him resting next to her.

As the morning matured, the two new friends upstairs chatted about sports and the different kinds of football in the two countries. They joked back and forth, and laughter seemed to be the best medicine they’d had in a while.

Claire arrived with the juice they had both requested. “Okay, you two, I think it’s time for a break. You could both use some rest.”

Daniel turned his head to respond. “Do we have to?” he whined, sounding younger than the boy.

He turned back to see sheer terror on Ryan’s face and noticed his legs twitching rapidly, followed next by his arms. Then his face sunk into a blank stare as he lost control of his body.

“Claire!” Daniel shouted, but she was already at his side.

She had seen this before and quickly responded by holding the boy’s head and reaching in for his tongue. “Try to hold his legs steady but don’t twist them.”

“I don’t want to hurt him!” He reached for the boy’s legs.

“You won’t. We just have to try to keep him from hurting himself.”

She put more of her weight on his upper torso, trying to relax the shaking, and whispered in his ear. “It’s okay. Just relax, just relax, you’re going to be fine, Ryan.”

Medically, she knew that he couldn’t hear her, but the additional effort helped to calm her whenever such an episode happened.

After a few terrifying minutes, the shaking stopped. Ryan was alert but too tired to engage in any conversation. His nurse sat at his bedside and allowed him to recover his energy.

Daniel sat in the corner of the room, still horrified at the whole ordeal. Leaning forward in his chair, he held his head in his hands, staring through his fingers.

Claire repeatedly brushed Ryan’s hair back with her hand. She was doing her job with the same attention as always but wondered how well she could continue to care for anyone, with all the concerns that lingered around her new love.

Daniel didn’t need another reminder that it was best to return to his room for rest. He descended the stairs slowly, one by one, in order to avoid another fainting spell. Ryan was in good hands now, and he felt it was best to just stay out of the way.

That evening while they were in bed together, Claire reached for Daniel’s hand. He gripped hers and then lifted it to his lips for a kiss. He rolled over to face her. “So, what did the doctor say about my condition?”

“He said we’ll know more tomorrow, so let’s talk about it then, okay?” She was fragile and unable to converse with him about the subject after such an emotional day. They kissed and fell asleep in each other’s arms.

Daniel dreamt about the day, the events leading to his illness, and Ryan’s face and body during his seizure. He awoke in fear, wondering if he shouldn’t be sitting upstairs to watch over the boy. Just in case, regardless of the alarm device that was set up to alert them to another episode. He stared at the ceiling as his flashbacks continued—now about his own life.

He thought about his friends in the office, the family he’d lost, and his good fortune to have Art as a friend and mentor. He knew Art would give anything to help him. He was just that kind of a person. Daniel always wished to be more like him.

His own words of prayer replayed in his head. Was he letting Ryan down by not giving him the same chance as the other two boys?

He stared at Claire for an hour, watching her sleep and kissing her forehead gently. She was usually a light sleeper, but on this night, she didn’t hear him leave the bed or wake to the sounds of footsteps traveling up the creaky stairs.

When he entered the room, there was a glow from the moon that spread like a calming blanket over the boy. Even though Ryan was resting quietly, Daniel couldn’t forget the horrible scene from earlier in the day. He walked quietly past the bed and out onto the balcony, searching for his star. He found it almost immediately, in the same place as before, still the brightest one in the sky.

He took a deep breath and folded his hands together in prayer. “I don’t know what you have in store for me, but I can’t stand by and watch what’s in this boy’s future.”

He paused and then recited his prayer as before—over and over, again and again.

“Lord, please help this boy, and take from me as you wish. I won’t tell anyone what you’ve done.”

Before his eyes could open to witness it, he once again missed a twinkle from the star’s glow. He returned slowly inside to check on Ryan.

He wondered how the boy’s fragile little body would survive the violent attacks. Daniel himself could barely stand due to the frailty of his own body but knew he had to act now. He put his hand on the boy’s forehead and closed his eyes. For an instant, the room brightened with the moonlight, gleaming as if it shone directly from the ceiling. A strong shock stiffened Daniel’s body and pushed him backwards to the floor. He was knocked unconscious and unable to wake on his own.

The crashing sound of his collapse woke Ryan. “Hello? Claire! Help!” He could see Daniel’s body lying on the floor motionless.

The noise through the floor had already awakened her and she was on her way up the stairs. Turning on the light, she saw Daniel on the floor, now shaking lightly. He was ice cold to the touch and she reached for an extra blanket to cover him.

In an alarmed state, she tried to assure Ryan, “Don’t worry, he will be okay!” She went quickly for the phone.

Daniel woke to find himself surrounded by familiar voices, but his eyes weren’t focused enough to recognize any of the figures at his bedside. “Claire, Claire!”

“Yes, I’m here, sweetheart. You’re in the hospital, and Dr. Abrams is here too.”

She dimmed the light over his bed to allow him to focus more clearly.

“Do you remember going upstairs? You were so worn down, you must have fainted. Was Ryan calling for me and I didn’t hear? I’m so sorry.”

“No, no, I had to go up.” Daniel remembered his promise of secrecy and paused. “I just wanted to make sure he was okay. I couldn’t sleep.”

“Dr. Abrams has a few things he wants to talk to us about later but, for now, just get some rest.” She pulled the bedsheets up higher on his chest to keep him from getting cold.

“Well, I’m up now, so let’s have it, Doctor,” he requested.

The doctor couldn’t remember another time he had struggled to present his diagnosis to anyone.

“Mr. Clay,” he began—he had been corrected in private about his earlier mistake with the patient’s name. “It is very difficult to tell at this point. I’ve never seen such a progressive case of disease, so we’re going to do a few more tests just to make sure.”

“Well, what is it? Just give it to me straight.”

“It looks as though you may have cancer, Mr. Clay.”

Time in the room stood still at this point. Daniel could faintly hear the doctor talking about biopsies and throat cancer, as well as swelling on his brain. The details were unimportant. His medical knowledge wasn’t sufficient to comprehend all of them. He could only take the news and stare blankly at the doctor, fearful of engaging Claire, in case his composure was lost.

“How long do I have to stay in here?” He now understood more than ever the coldness that could be felt within the hospital walls.

“I’d like to keep you until I can fully determine your diagnosis.”

“I think I’d rather be at home—at least there’s a view there.” He tried, unsuccessfully, for a smile from Claire.

“As soon as the tests are done, we’ll go home and move you to the room upstairs, for the view,” she responded.

“What about Ryan?”

Claire looked at the doctor, then again at Daniel. “Ryan’s not there anymore.”

“You mean…? Did I hurt him?”

“No, no. He’s just with his parents now.”

“Kind of a miracle, actually,” the doctor interjected. “He just stood up and walked out without his brace, probably in shock from the ordeal. I’m still running tests.”

With Brenda’s help, Claire moved some of Daniel’s belongings upstairs and removed all the unnecessary medical equipment. The room was as it had always been, just as beautiful, but more decorated with a cozy ambience and less institutional.

It was protocol for the ambulance to make delivery of a destabilized patient to their home. When Daniel arrived, he was thankful and apologetic for the efforts of his nurse.

“You shouldn’t have done all this. Thank you. It’s amazing.”

He crawled straight into bed, attempting not to expose how close he was to falling down. Growing physically weaker, he was mentally exhausted with concerns about his illness and how he might have developed it.

Claire was also in need of rest. She was working double shifts to be with him and had only slept an hour at a time during her breaks. She made him comfortable first as a patient then took to his side in bed as a partner. They both enjoyed an evening of much-needed sleep.

For the next couple of days, they talked and enjoyed plenty of rest. Claire took time off again, and Brenda stopped by a few times with household supplies. On the third night, she appeared with ulterior motives. Through the front door, she could see Claire sobbing in the kitchen. Brenda said she would take a turn upstairs to check on Daniel, allowing the younger nurse to take an emotional breather. Claire agreed and sat at the table, sipping her tea.

Brenda trekked up the stairs purposefully, taking one step at a time, carrying what appeared to be a black medical bag. Once she entered the room, she sat at Daniel’s side quietly, so as not to disturb his peaceful state. She laid the bag at her feet and reached in it to organize her surprise.

It had been almost forty years since she had used the instrument, but she played it almost every day in her mind. Seated next to Daniel, she woke him gently. He was too frail to speak but able to recognize his visitor and acknowledge her with a smile. After a few deep breaths, she closed her eyes and, with only a slight pause, began to perform.

Daniel was her first audience since the son she had lost. She played beautifully with slow and extended notes, exuding a melodic passion. The sound of the flute echoed throughout the entire house and soothed everyone within its walls. The large rooms and high ceilings held the music and cherished it as if it were being played in the finest opera house.

Claire sat in the kitchen with her cup held tightly between her two palms. Her eyes remained closed, and the tears stopped while she absorbed the healing sounds from upstairs.

Daniel kept his eyes closed too. His body stretched out flat then relaxed in a meditative position, head back and arms to his side, palms up. The music infused his soul as he returned to sleep.

Brenda removed the instrument from her lips and placed it back in its case. “Thank you for listening, Daniel—tonight and before, when I spoke about my life.”

After descending the stairs as smoothly as she had played, she reached the bottom and went through to the kitchen to find Claire, now leaning against the counter. They smiled at one another, and no words were necessary. Brenda turned and left the house to return home.

Though most of the test results were in, they were not conclusive, and Claire did not give Daniel the updates that she had received by phone. She could see how fast he was deteriorating. In her own medical experience, she had never seen such a rapid degeneration.

Their conversations grew shorter, as neither could bear the thought of the future. Time and health had passed too quickly to discuss anything but the present and what could be done to lessen each other’s pain.

Claire struggled with the thought of having him moved back to the hospital. His shallow breathing and delicate gestures troubled her. He was peaceful, though, as he stared out at the sky. She didn’t realize that he was searching for a certain star, to make his peace with before he could sleep.

His only other struggle was whether to discuss what had really happened, in hopes it could bring some comfort to her, but he remembered his promise and closed his eyes to fall asleep.

It was impossible to care for him as just a patient, but she tried to ease his fever with a cold cloth and kept the lights down low for his eyes. His coughing had almost ceased now, as his breathing was simply too weak to initiate any irritation.

After a quiet moment at his side, she kissed his nose and tried desperately not to drop a tear on his face. She headed for the balcony to cry alone and leave him in peace.

Standing in the night, weeping brokenly, she recalled the first time they met. She was grateful and only wished that it had been earlier in their lives and they could have had more time together. She remembered his pain in losing Isabelle and his joy in spending time with Matthew.

She slid down to the balcony floor and, with her back supported by the outer glass surface, sat facing up to the sky. Then she closed her eyes and bowed her head into her hands. After catching her breath, she spoke out loud in prayer.

“I have spent the better part of my life caring for people and will spend the rest of my living days doing so. But I can’t do it alone. I love this man with all my heart, and I plead for you to free him from disease and leave him with me to care for. Please, Lord. Amen.”

The star that Daniel always found was unfamiliar to Claire. It faded slowly into the darkness of the sky, without a flicker. Back over her shoulder through the window, she stared at his frail features. She could also see her own reflection in the glass and wiped away the tracks of tears that ran down her cheeks.

Returning to the room to join him at his bedside, she touched the cloth on his forehead to make sure it was just right. He was too deep in his fevered dreamworld to feel her wet lips touching his. After kissing him, she crawled into her side of the bed and fell asleep.

His restlessness awoke her. She couldn’t believe it was morning already.

“How are you feeling?” she asked, not expecting an encouraging response.