Authors: Janet Dailey
“I'll just bet that's what Raul felt,” he mocked bitterly, then stopped, causing Luz to halt. “Is it true what the guys are saying about you two?”
The challenge took her completely by surprise. She had thought he was upset over her absence from the practice field.
No words came out. She just stood there looking at him. How did a mother admit to a grown son that she was having an affair?
“It is true, isn't it?” Rob accused in disgust. “He's screwing you, isn't he?”
“Rob, stop it.” She clenched her fingers into her hands, holding them rigidly at her side to keep from slapping him.
“You were really all broken up over the divorce, weren't you. It really tore you up, didn't it?” he taunted. “Five months! That's all it's been and already you're hopping into bed with another man. It really hurt you, didn't it? You needed me. That's what you said.”
“And I meant it. Rob, you're my son,” Luz insisted angrily. “Whatever is between Raul and me has nothing to do with you.”
“Hasn't it? Do you think he's going to want me around? Look at the way he's already persuaded you to stay away from the practice sessions. If you can't see what he's doing, you're blind!”
“That isn't true. That came about before I ⦠we ⦠ever became involved. Raul is no threat to you. You're being childish.” She realized immediately that it was the wrong thing to say, however accurate it might be. She was the one guilty of encouraging Rob's closeness and dependency on her. She couldn't blame him for being possessive of her now. “I'll speak to Raul about observing the training sessions again. I'm sure he'll reconsider.”
“Be sure to ask him while his cock is stiff. A man will agree to anything then.”
She slapped his face. “Don't ever speak to me like that again!”
He went white, his features drawn and pinched with rage. He glared at her for a long second, then turned on his heel and stalked away. Her outrage died almost instantly, leaving a heavy anxiety and confusion in its place.
After four weeks of playing, eating, and relaxing with the other players, Rob was familiar with their backgrounds, habits, and vices. He knew exactly which one to seek out and headed straight to a young Argentine, Tony Lamberti. More than once
he'd caught him slipping outside in the evenings to smoke a joint; he had shared one with him a couple times.
“Tony, come here. I gotta talk to you.” Rob dragged him away from the trio of giggling girls.
“Che!
I will let you have one.” The handsome dark-haired, dark-eyed man of twenty-two considered himself the consummate lover. Rob had even seen him turning on the charm with Anna.
“You can have all three,” Rob muttered indifferently. “Just tell me how I can get my hands on some coke.” At the initial frowning stare he received, he added more explicitly, “You know, cocaine.”
“Che! El loco pibe!”
“English, dammit. And I'm not crazy.” Rob struggled to control the seething rage that pushed at him.
Everything had gone sour for him lately. Admittedly he was learning a lot, but somebody was always riding him, criticizing him and finding faultâusually Raul. Now his own mother was going against him. He needed the lift coke could give him. Everybody was trying to drag him down, but he'd show them. Hell, he wasn't hooked on the stuff. It had been four weeks since he'd had anyâand he'd been free-basing. That proved he wasn't addicted to it. But he needed its boost right now. Luz could go screw herself silly. He didn't need her.
“Listen, Tony,” he lowered his voice. “I want a couple bags of cocaine. I got the money to pay for it. Don't worry. And you know where I can get it. What do you say,
compadre?
You've got your car here.” Still hesitant, Tony eyed him warily and Rob's impatience grew. “Don't try to tell me you can't get it. The damned stuff grows here.”
“S
Ã. The coca plant is a crop that is grown here. It used to be sold to your Coca-Cola Company. But your government made them take the coke out of the cola, no? Now the workers in the mountains, they are smarter. They chew the leaves so they won't feel so tired or cold or hungry. This has been so for hundreds of years. The coca was considered a divine plant by the Incas. Did you know this?”
“I'm not interested in a damned dissertation on the history of cocaine. Are you going to put me in touch with your dealer or not? All I want is yes or no,” Rob demanded.
For a long, slow minute, there was silence as Tony made
up his mind. “He will not sell to you. I will make the buy for you.”
A smile spread across Rob's face as he relaxed. “I knew I could count on you, Tony.”
“I will make a phone call. We will see.”
“Sure, Tony. Sure.”
The late return from the polo matches necessitated a late dinner at the
estancia.
After changing clothes, Luz went downstairs to join the others. But her mind wasn't on food. She was just going through the motions for the sake of maintaining the routine so that she didn't draw attention to herself and arouse questions she didn't want to answer. This matter was strictly between herself and Rob, and no one else's business.
The softly flaring skirt of parchment linen brushed her calves as she entered the large living room where the group had assembled. She paused an instant, scanning the faces, then walked in. “Where's Rob? Hasn't he come down yet?”
“I don't think he's back,” Duke Sovine replied. “He and Tony left the club together, and they haven't showed up here so far.”
“I see,” she murmured while her fingers worried with a button on her cream-colored cardigan vest.
“They probably stopped somewhere and ran into some girls. You know how Tony is,” the Texan reminded her.
“Yes, of course.” It was a logical explanation, and probably accurate. Knowing Rob, he was probably staying out just to make her worry about him. And it was working, she realized with vague irritation. Fixing a smile in place, Luz glanced at Hector and avoided any contact with Raul, the source for Rob's bitter confrontation with her. “I hope you were not planning to wait dinner for them, Hector. They could be quite late.”
“Si
, we will eat now, but I will make certain there is food waiting for them in the kitchen when they return,” Hector promised.
It was late when Rob and Tony returned to the
estancia.
Luz sat tensely in front of the small television set in a corner of the living room, indifferent to the Spanish program being broadcast. When she heard the front door open and boisterous, laughing voices in the entry hall, she made herself remain in the chair. She waited until the approaching footsteps entered
the living room, then rose and turned to meet her son. His laughing smile never faded when he saw her, but the defiant glitter in his dark eyes mocked her for waiting up for him.
“Where is everyone?” Tony Lamberti stared at the half-dozen occupants lounging in the living room.
“They've retired to their rooms for the night,” Luz replied, aware Raul was among those who had gone upstairs in the last half hour. “It is late,” she reminded Rob pointedly and advanced toward the wide doors to the hall. “I believe there is food in the kitchen for you. I'll let Hector know you've returned.”
“Don't bother,” Rob said. “I'm not hungry.”
“Me neither, señora,” Tony echoed. “We have already had something. Is that not so, Rob?”
Rob grinned at his companion. “We sure did.”
“In that case ⦔ Luz paused, turning slightly to face him. “I'd like a private word with you, Rob.”
Tony mockingly clicked his tongue at Rob. “Your
madre
is upset with you. You are a bad boy for staying out so late, no?” He gave Rob a shove, pushing him toward Luz. “You must tell her how sorry you are. You do not want her to be angry with you.” He walked away laughing, mocking Rob for being a mama's boy.
Reluctantly and defiantly, Rob walked over to her. She had the distinct feeling he'd been drinking, although she could smell no alcohol on his breath. “Where do you want to have this âprivate word'?”
“In here.” She walked stiffly to the game room, waited until Rob followed her in, then closed the doors. He wandered over to the pool table and began rolling the billiard balls across the felt-covered slate.
“What is it you want? As if I didn't know.”
“We need to clear up this business about Raul.” Luz caught the ball he was rolling, obtaining Rob's attention. “I was under the impression that you thought a lot of him.”
“Yeah, as a polo player.” Rob straightened from his bent position. “But if you couldn't stand not having a man, I don't see why you had to pick him.”
“I like him, Rob.” At the moment, that was as far as it went. Their relationship was more physical than emotional. They enjoyed a sexual intimacy, but they weren't together for long enough periods for it to have advanced very far beyond
that. Luz cared for him, but she wasn't sure how much. It hadn't been important to find out yet. “But you are my son. I love you. Nothingâno manâwill ever change that.”
“Yeah.” He picked up another ball and rolled it between his hands.
“That is the truth.”
“So you're going to keep sleeping with him, is that it?” A sideways fling of his hand sent the ball careening wildly around the table. “Go ahead. In the meantime, I'm going to pick his brains clean. I'm going to be a better polo player than he ever dreamed of being. I can do it, you know.” He tilted his head, a smug confidence in his look. “You'll see. I'm going to be the best.”
“And I'll always be there, Rob.” She wanted to reassert his importance to her.
“Yeah.” He thrust his hands inside his jacket pockets. “If that's all you wanted to talk to me about, I'll go to my room now.”
“That's all, I guess.” Containing a sigh, Luz decided this grudging acceptance of the situation was the most she could expect from Rob for the time being. Later maybe he'd understand, and there wouldn't be this wedge between them.
After Rob had left the game room, she lingered for a while longer, wondering what else she could have said. Finally she went upstairs to her own room, but the conversation continued to dominate her thoughts. She stood at the window, leaning a shoulder against the heavy wood frame, and stared into the black night. She and Rob had always been so close. Now there was this distance between them.
The divorce was partly to blame for his attitude, Luz realized. She had always known that Rob felt Drew had abandoned him, too. But it had never occurred to Luz that he would regard her relationship with another man as a kind of abandonment as well. In his thinking, Drew had left him for Claudia, and maybe now she was leaving him for Raul. She hadn't thought he'd look at it that way. Somewhere she'd gotten it into her head that only young children went through the trauma of their parents' divorce. Rob was supposedly old enough to understand that it wasn't a rejection of him. But age had nothing to do with some feelings, she realized.
The light rap on her door failed to penetrate her thoughts.
She wasn't conscious of any sound until she heard the click of the latch turning. She glanced toward the door, her start fading when she saw Raul step inside. A frown flickered across his expression as he paused, his gaze taking note of her fully dressed state.
“Is it that late?” She straightened from the window and turned into the room, attempting a welcoming smile.
“It does not matter.” Raul crossed to her side and lightly took her shoulders, bending to kiss her upturned face. Her response to the warm pressure of his mouth was not what it could be, she knew. So did Raul. He lifted his head to study her expression. “What is it?”
“Rob knows about us.” Luz felt Raul should be aware of it. But this was her problem, not his.
“It upsets you that he knows?”
“Yes ⦠no.” It was difficult to explain. “I'm not ashamed of being with you. But Rob sees it as some sort of defection. He's angry and hurt. And I am upset that he feels that way. I expected problems with Trisha, but not Rob. I knew he liked you, but I never suspected he would become jealous.”
“He will get over it.”
“In time, I suppose.” She stared at the rough terry cloth of his robe, then put her arms around him and rested her head on his shoulder. His hands moved onto her back, his arms crossing to hold her. He bent his head, rubbing his cheek and jaw against her hair while she absently listened to the steady beat of his heart. Luz closed her eyes, satisfied just to be held. “I'm afraid Rob has gotten the idea that you'll take me away from him. He thinks you're deliberately trying to keep us apart, and my staying away from practice is proof, as far as he's concerned.” She tilted her head back to look at him. “Raul, I have to watch the sessions again.”
“Even though it will not help him?”
“My not being there has turned into more of a distraction, I'm afraid. It's made him wonder why, and he's come up with the wrong reason. Under the circumstances, I'll never convince him differently. I'll have to be on the sidelines to prove he's wrong.”
“And if I say no?”
“Don't, Raul. Don't make me choose,” Luz warned. “Because I'll have to choose my son.”
“This is your decision, then. My opinion is of no importance even though I am his instructor,” he challenged.
“Of course it's important. But don't you see, Rob already resents you. How long do you think it will be before that manifests itself in the workouts? I'm doing this as much for you as for me. Even though Rob is jealous of you, he still respects you. I don't want that to change.” She absently studied the narrow line of his lips, so firm and unyielding. A rueful smile slanted her own. “I'm selfish, I guess. I want you both.”