The Children Who Time Lost (6 page)

I got my third page of the day around 4 p.m. I knew who it was and I ignored it. Selena rushed in a few minutes later. “Will you at least tell him to stop calling if you won’t speak to him?” Her voice carried a playful tone.

I smiled and glanced at Warren. He smiled at me. “You go and talk to him,” he said. “I’ll be fine here.”

I nodded and walked to the sink to wash my hands. Warren waved at the Kyso that had stood outside the room ever since I’d arrived. The robot walked back in.

“Take your time,” Warren said as I left. “I’ve got all the help I need here.”

“You’re the best,” I said. Warren had been nothing but nice to me since I started working at the hospital five years before. He’d helped me through so many hard times, especially after Madeline died and my marriage stagnated. Suzanna always joked that if Kevin ever left me, I should go after Warren. I guess I found him handsome in an older-guy kind of way. With his long dark hair and neatly trimmed goatee, he certainly didn’t look fifty.

Selena was waiting for me with the cordless phone in her hand when I arrived at reception. She had a firm but playful scowl on her face. I took the phone and walked toward the cafeteria. “Hi, Kevin,” I said.

“How did you know it was me?”

“Well, seeing as you’ve already called me three times today, I just had a feeling.”

“I certainly hope so,” Kevin said, “or I might have to get jealous.”

I chuckled.

“When do you finish?”

“I don’t know. I might stay a bit late. Why?”

“I just thought we could watch the Lotto together before going out.”

I frowned. “Kevin—”

“Forget it. I’m sorry. I just thought … You know what, don’t worry about it. Just call me half an hour before you finish and I’ll come and get you.”

“I won’t be long, I promise.”

“Okay, honey,” he said. “I love you.”

“Ditto.” I hung up and stood in the middle of the cafeteria. A few people stared at me as they read their papers and watched the wall-mounted TV. I knew why they were looking and wished they would stop. I was supposed to be this famous figure, but deep down, I was really just a pathetic mess. I couldn’t even get through a dinner without breaking down. I walked back to the reception area to return the phone to Selena.

The clock struck six as Warren ushered me into his office. I didn’t know what to think. I didn’t think I had done anything to warrant disciplinary action, and he had never asked me to see him alone in his office before. I knew there had been talk among some of the other doctors and nurses to the effect that he had a soft spot for me, but I always thought he had too much respect for me to speak of it.

He opened the door for me and stood aside. I walked in, giving him a questioning glance. He smiled at me like nothing was wrong. After we sat down, he interlocked his fingers. “How are you doing, Rachel?”

I shrugged. “I don’t understand.”

“How are the headaches? The nightmares? Are you feeling better, or are the shakes getting worse?”

I sank back in the chair and nodded. “I don’t know what’s going on anymore. My mind’s everywhere. I’m now having visions when I’m out.”

“I take it you’re still seeing Jarrod.”

I nodded. “Yes, I am. He’s been wonderful.”

“But unethical,” Warren said with a raised voice. He placed both hands on his thighs and stood up.

“What is it, Warren? What’re you not telling me? What’ve you got against Jarrod?”

“Doesn’t it strike you as odd that your condition has worsened over the years, and now that you’re no longer part of the experiments, you’re losing your mind?”

“But we all knew the risks.”

He rushed forward and knelt beside me. My eyes widened. “But that’s the thing,” he said. “Those risks aren’t necessary.” He paused for a moment and stood up. He walked back to his seat. “I’ve known Jarrod for a very long time. We actually worked together on some of the more successful vaccines for the ribiti virus a few years back.”

“Okay.”

“I just … I think he’s reckless. He started human trials on some of the drugs we worked on way before they were ready. Thousands died. Somehow, he got people in the government to cover it up. Of course I can’t prove it, but what other reason could there be? He’s like a hero to them even now. I just feel that he might be doing the same thing with you. You’re not safe with him.”

I jumped to my feet, arms waving. “This is the person who’s treated me for ten whole years and you pick now to tell me? How about five years ago, when we started working together?”

“It wasn’t my place. Besides, Jarrod is still one of the most renowned doctors in the world. His research is helping to cure infertility. With any luck, we might have up to twenty natural births within the next ten years, all because of him.”

“Then what’s the problem?! And why tell me now if it’s not your place? What’s changed?”

“I’m just worried he might be losing ground and might try more aggressive methods. I just don’t want you to be his guinea pig.” He walked up to me and held my shoulders. “Look, I know the problems you’re having. You must know that you’re more than a colleague to me. I care about you, Rachel. That’s why I want you to allow me to take over your treatment.”

My eyes narrowed and I eased myself from his grasp.

“I can’t promise that your nightmares will go away,” he said, “or that your headaches will disappear, but I can promise you honest treatment.”

I didn’t know what to think. In a matter of seconds, he had me thinking that Jarrod might not be a good guy after all. But why should I trust his word without evidence? I glanced at my watch and then the door.

“What is it?” he said. “What’re you thinking about?”

I shook my head. “I need Jarrod’s meds. I can’t go through the pain of not having them. Do you know what it’s like for your whole body to feel like it’s about to explode? For your hands and feet to shake in front of people like you’re some kind of junkie?”

He just stared at me.

“Well, Jarrod’s meds stop all of that from happening, so it’s not so easy to just stop going to him for treatment.”

Warren took a step toward me. “You have my word, Rachel. I’ll do everything in my power to ease your pain.”

I backed toward the door. “I can’t. … I’ve got to go. At least let me think about this.”

He nodded and gestured toward the door. “Please do. I’m here for you, day or night.”

I rushed out of the room and down the corridor. My head was spinning. I just couldn’t imagine Jarrod doing the things Warren had said. Me, a guinea pig? I couldn’t accept that. I got to the reception area two minutes later. A number of people were huddled there, their eyes glued to the TV. Selena stood on her chair behind the reception desk, watching intently. I looked toward the door, but my curiosity got the better of me. I edged toward the side of the desk and raised a bar to let myself through.

“What’s going on?” I whispered to Selena.

Rapturous applause suddenly broke out and everyone around me jumped for joy. Men grabbed their partners and kissed them fervently. Some ran around the corridor shouting like crazy people. I didn’t understand what was going on. I looked at the TV, but the program had cut to a commercial.

Selena was also jumping up and down and raising her arms in the air. I grabbed her shoulders and shook her. “What the hell’s going on?”

“We won,” she said. “We did it.”

I squinted. “What’re you talking about?”

“The Lotto,” she said. “Three people in L.A. won it for the first time in almost ten years.” She turned around and continued raising her arms in the air

I turned away. I was happy for whoever it was, but I couldn’t deny feeling a hint of jealousy. I still didn’t know if I could cope with playing such a cruel game, though.

My cell vibrated. I saw Kevin’s name on the caller-ID. But he wouldn’t have been able to hear me with the ruckus. I held on to my bag and ran outside before answering. Kevin was screaming. He sounded just as crazy as the people in the hospital.

“Kevin. Kevin,” I screamed. “What is it?”

“Oh, baby, you won’t believe it.”

“What?”

“We won. We won. Woo!”

“I know we won. Everyone here’s been talking about it. The first triple victory in California for ten years or something.”

“No, you don’t get it,” he shouted. “It’s not just California. It’s you and me. We were one of the winners. We’ve won a baby.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Yesterday after you left the restaurant, I was upset and just did it. I played it for us, baby. I put your name down and the numbers that came back were ours. We’re Lotto winners. Woo!”

My hands went numb. I dropped the phone. My lips trembled and my legs turned to jelly.
I’m going to be a mother again.
I slumped and fell to the ground.

Chapter Five

I
opened my eyes to the sight of Warren staring down at me. I felt pain in the back of my head when I moved it. I recognized the bed I lay on—the one in his office. It didn’t seem appropriate, and anyone walking in might have thought something was going on.

“She’s awake,” I heard someone say.

I looked to my left to see at least fifty people staring at me. I recognized most of the people who’d been jumping around after the winners were announced. Then I remembered that the winners were from L.A. Then I remembered Kevin’s phone call. But it couldn’t have been so. Was I really one of the winners?

The door burst open, and Kevin’s perspiring face soon emerged from the crowd. He knelt beside me and held my hands. “Are you okay, baby?”

It was real. I was a winner. I was going to have a baby again. I smiled at him and squeezed his hands. “I was just in shock, is all. I’m okay.”

“I’m so sorry for not telling you this morning. I didn’t think anything would come of it.” He kissed my forehead. “We’re going to be parents again.”

I scowled at him and shook my head, silently telling him to keep his voice down.

“It’s fine. They know anyway. The organizers figured you were one of the winners and announced it. Everyone knows.”

I frowned. They never announced the winners until the post-interview, after the children had been collected. Maybe it was just because it was me.

Selena walked up to us and crouched, as did almost everyone else in the room. All I could see was an endless sea of people, all staring down at me. “Congratulations, Rachel,” Selena said.

Tears of joy streamed from my eyes. “Where’s Suzanna and Jenny?” I said. “We need to get them here, too.”

“We’re already here, Rachel.” The voice came from the back of the room. I forced my head up and grimaced at the pain I felt, but I had to see my best friends. I saw Jenny first. Her short blond hair looked lighter than usual, almost white. Suzanna was right behind her, holding her shoulders; if Jenny were any smaller than her size six, she would have fallen to the floor under the weight. They forced their way to the front of the long line of people trying to get a glimpse of me.

If I’d hated being famous before, it had just gotten a whole lot worse.

Kevin caressed my cheek and stood aside, beside Warren, who had not lost the warm smile on his face.

“I can’t believe you won,” Jenny said in her high-pitched voice. She leaned down and gave me a bear hug. It was so tight that I grimaced, but I didn’t stop her. I knew how happy she was for me. She had told me many times that she would never stop praying for me, praying that I could have another baby. While this wasn’t what she’d had in mind, her prayers appeared to have been answered.

Suzanna tapped Jenny, who moved to the foot of the bed. Suzanna sat down and looked into my eyes, tears streaming down her face. Behind her, the others moved even closer. Many cried and held their palms together.

“This is the best news ever, honey,” Suzanna said. “We’ve got to celebrate.”

I nodded. “But whe—”

“They’re outside,” someone shouted from the back of the room. Kevin turned toward the voice, his smile gone. A thickset man in a dark gray cardigan came into view, panting for breath. He must have been running. “The press. At least twenty different news crews, all outside waiting for Rachel.”