Read Sunday the Rabbi Stayed Home Online
Authors: Harry Kemelman
“I don’t understand you, David.” Miriam pressed her fist against her mouth, as though to stifle harsh words of reproof. “He came to make amends. He was trying so hard to effect a reconciliation. And he’s a good man.”
“Of course, he’s a good man. And so are Gorfinkle and the rest of them. They’re all good men, or they wouldn’t be so concerned about what may happen to a poor Negro that stumbled into a mess of trouble. But goodness is not enough. The people who took part in the religious wars were good men, but they killed and maimed in the tens of thousands nevertheless.”
“Oh, David, you’re so so inflexible. Can’t you bend a little?”
He looked at her in surprise. “I bend when I have to, and I can. But Ive got to be careful not to bend so far that I’ll fall over.”
On Sundays the minyan was held at nine instead of seven thirty, as it was on weekday mornings. Although it was a lovely day and he had plenty of time to walk, the rabbi took his car. He did not go directly to the temple, but drove along the shore, stopping once or twice along the way to enjoy the sight of the waves breaking against the rocks and the gulls swooping down low over the water.
The road hugged the shore and then fell away, and he looked ahead and realized that he was approaching Hillson House. He slowed down as he came abreast of it and for a moment thought of stopping to look around. But he saw a man standing at the window of the adjoining house, talking into a telephone, so he drove on.
He arrived just in time for the service. Sundays always drew a larger crowd, because many fathers who brought their children to the Sunday school attended the minyan for lack of anything better to do while waiting to take them home. Today the short service was followed by a collation, given by one of the regular members in honor of his daughter’s engagement.
They stood around, sipping their tea or coffee, munching cake and cookies, unleavened, of course, in keeping with the Passover regulation, since the holiday began that evening. Arthur Nussbaum was there, still pushing his pet project. “Look, fellows. I tell you it makes no sense to keep all that dough just sitting in a bank ”
“It’s earning interest, isn’t it?”
“So every year costs go up twice as much. Sooner or later, everybody knows we’re going to change those seats. If we had gone ahead when the money was first left to us, we could have done half the sanctuary, right up to the center aisle. This year the money probably wouldn’t cover more than a third.”
“Yeah, fat chance of having some seats of one kind and the rest another. It will look terrible. The women will raise Cain.”
“Let ‘em. Don’t you see,” Nussbaum urged, “if they think it looks funny, they’ll work all the harder to get the rest put in.”
“Yeah? Well, if you think there was a stink about permanent seating, just wait till the first third of the sanctuary is fancied up with one kind of seat ”
The rabbi, who was standing nearby., murmured. “So why does it have to be the first third? Why not start replacing the seats from the rear?” He spotted Paff leaving the chapel and excused himself.
Nussbaum overheard the remark and repeated it to the others.
“Is he kidding?”
“That would be even worse. That would guarantee getting everyone sore.”
“Not as sore as our present seats.” said Dr. Edelstein. “You put padded seats in back, and you can put me down for one right now.”
Irving Kallen nodded. “You may have something at that, Doc. For me I don’t care. I’m well-padded, but my old man, I’d bet he’d really appreciate it.”
“When you come down to it,” said Nussbaum slowly, “it’s only fair.”
Brennerman, who was standing by, pursed his lips, then suddenly broke into a delighted roar of laughter. “By God. Nussbaum, you’re right. The rabbi’s come up with the perfect solution!”
They all looked at him.
“Don’t you see it, boys? Front rowyicchus, back row tuchus. Suit yourself!” Laughing loudly, he spotted Gorfinkle and hurried over to tell him what had happened.
The rabbi hailed Paff and led him to a side corridor. When they were a safe distance from the others, he said. “I read your statement to the police. Mr. Paff. Judging from the names of those people you listed as partners in your business deal, I suspect you were interested in Hillson House as a possible new temple.”
Paff grinned. “That’s right. Rabbi, but of course, it’s out of the question now. We’re letting the whole matter drop for the time being.” He thought of something. “I was going to tell you, of course, but Becker reported that you weren’t interested anyway.”
“That’s all right,” the rabbi hastened to assure him. “I wasn’t, and I’m not. My reason for questioning you is that I wanted to clarify some things in my own mind with respect to this case. You told the police that you slowed down as you approached Hillson House and then drove on. Is that correct?”
“Yes?”
“You didn’t stop?”
Paff considered. “I may have stopped for a moment.”
“You’re quite sure you didn’t stop for much longer than a moment?”
“What are you getting at, Rabbi?”
“I’m suggesting that you stopped for quite a while, perhaps fifteen or twenty minutes or even longer.”
“Why do you say that?”
“Because as it stands your statement doesn’t ring true. I passed Hillson House on my way over to the temple this morning. That’s a straight stretch of road, no turn, nothing blocking your vision. Even in a rainstorm, long before you reached Hillson House by whichever direction you approached, you could see whether someone was waiting there or not. So there was no need for you to slow down. And since you expected to meet someone there. I suggest that you would have waited for fifteen minutes anyway.”
“All right, suppose I did?”
“Then the police might wonder why you didn’t bother to go inside in all that time.”
“I didn’t. I swear I didn’t, Rabbi.”
“Why not?”
His face showed resignation. “I don’t really know. Ive been by there any number of times, but I guess it was during the daytime, and it always looked bright and cheerful. And this night it was all dark, and it was raining, and I just didn’t like the idea of going in alone.”
“Then why didn’t you tell the police the truth?”
“You know how it is. Rabbi. I heard that Moose had been found in there. Well, he worked for me, and I knew him. If
I said I had been waiting around there for half an hour or so, they’d begin to ask me questions: Did I hear anything? Did I see anything? Why didn’t I go in? No, I just didn’t want to get involved.
“Well. I’d say you were involved now. If I were you. I’d go down to the police and tell them you’d like to change your statement.”
“But that would mean that I was lying, and that would look suspicious.”
“It will look a lot more suspicious when they find out the truth.”
Paff sighed. “I suppose you’re right, Rabbi.”
When he arrived home, he found Lanigan waiting for him.
“I thought those morning prayer services of yours only last about half an hour.” the chief of police complained.
“There was a collation afterward,” said the rabbi, “and then I had to perform an errand of mercy; I went to visit the sick. Sorry you had to wait. Is it business or purely social?”
Lanigan grinned. “I guess it’s always a little bit of both when I come visiting. I understand, Rabbi, that there’s a movement afoot to set up a Jenkins Defense Committee. You know anything about it?”
“Yes, as a matter of fact. I do. Why, do you object to it?”
“Well, of course, every man has a right yes, I object to it!” said Lanigan. “I know this man Donohue. He’ll stir up a lot of trouble and maybe create an atmosphere in this town that we might be years getting over. And none of it will do Jenkins any good. It will just be a lot of propaganda about social justice and the rights of the underprivileged and Lord knows what all. And it won’t have any bearing on this case, because Jenkins is going to get a fair trial, and it’s got nothing to do with whether he’s black, white, or green with yellow polka dots.”
Tm not sure. Are you giving him a fair shake? It seems to me that you’ve made up your mind that he’s guilty H
“I don’t decide whether he’s guilty or not. That’s up to a judge and jury. But naturally I have an opinion. Ive dealt fairly with him throughout. You were present when I questioned him. Did I browbeat him? I practically begged him to get a lawyer. He didn’t want one.”
“But when he told his story, didn’t you automatically assume those parts that indicated he was guilty were true and those that suggested he might be innocent a pack of lies?”
“You’ve always got to choose from the available material what youll believe and what you won’t. You know that. Take Jenkins’ statement that there was somebody parked right across the street for about twenty minutes ”
“That’s true.”
“How do you mean?”
The rabbi told of his conversation with Paff.
Lanigan strode around the room as he thought aloud. “That means Paff might have seen Jenkins enter the house and waited there to see what would happen. When Jenkins doesn’t come out, he rides off? So that leaves him on the scene with transportation to return and no real alibi ” He shook his head vigorously. “No. I don’t believe it. Rabbi. You wouldn’t throw a member of your congregation to the wolves just like that. You must have something else in mind.”
“I’m merely suggesting that there are other possibilities. You yourself suggested Gorfinkle and Jacobs. The point is that Jenkins is not the only one whose actions are suspect; besides, your case against him is full of holes.”
“Like what?”
“How about the death of that man in Boston? How does Jenkins fit into that?”
“I don’t say he had anything to do with that. His death and the connection with Moose that’s pure coincidence.”
“Coincidences happen, but not often. But the big objection to your case against Jenkins is that the next door neighbor, this ”
“Mr. Begg?”
“Yes, Mr. Begg. He saw a light. That’s what led him to call the police.”
Lanigan looked puzzled for a moment, and then his face cleared. “Oh, I see what you’re getting at that someone came to the house after Jenkins left, that he put on the light, and that he presumably killed Moose maybe your Mr. Paff. It’s a good effort, Rabbi, but here’s where I demolish it. Jenkins said that he drew the shades and the drapes before he put on a light. Right?”
“Right.”
“And there was no reason for him to lie about something like that.”
“Agreed.”
“So if someone, Paff or a mysterious stranger, had put on a light, it would not have shown.”
“Precisely. Then how could Begg have seen a light?”
“Huh?”
“The youngsters were all agreed that they did not put on a light. Jenkins used a flashlight but only after he had drawn the drapes ”
“Then how could Begg have seen a light in the house?”
“That was my question.” said the rabbi pointedly. “But I can suggest an answer. The only way he could have seen a light with all the windows blocked off was by having himself been in the house and put them on.”
“You saying ”
“I am saying that he entered the house after Jenkins left. Since as the caretaker he must have had a key, the locked door presented no problem. He snapped on the light on entering and then went through each of the rooms. I’m suggesting that he put the plastic sheet over the boy’s head, and then, leaving the lights on as an excuse to call the police, he hurried back to his own house, where there was a phone.”
“And forgot to close the front door?”
“No. left it ajar purposely. I imagine, either on the chance of the cruising car spotting it in which case, he would not be involved even as informer or perhaps so as not to raise any immediate question of how the murderer had got in.”
Lanigan massaged his square chin with a big red hand as he checked back over the rabbi’s reasoning. Then he grinned. “You had me going there for a minute. Rabbi. It all sounds plausible except” he held up an admonishing forefinger “that he called from his own house. On the way back, he would have noticed that there was no light coming through the windows of Hillson House, because the blinds were drawn.”
The rabbi nodded. “Yes, and the phone is in a room which overlooks Hillson House. I drove by this morning and saw him at the window, phone in hand. So standing there, talking to the police, he’d certainly notice that there was no light coming from the windows of Hillson House. And the explanation is that there is where a real coincidence occurred.”
“What coincidence?”
“That while he was still inside Hillson House, or just as he left, all the lights in that part of town went out.”
“You mean the transformer blowing?”
“M-hm. That was the only coincidence.”
“How about his happening to go over there?”
“That was no coincidence. He went right after Jenkins left because Jenkins left. I mean he may have seen Jenkins leave or heard him starting up his motorcycle, right next door so to speak, so he hurried over to investigate. It looked all right; the door was locked and it was dark. But, of course, he had to make sure. He had a key and went in. Naturally, he put on the lights. Maybe he listened for a moment or called out. Then he went for a look around and found Moose. Since he wanted the body found immediately, that very night ”
“Why did it have to be that night?”
“Because if he waited a day or two, he himself would have to find the body he was the caretaker. This way, it would be the police who would find the body, and if they came that night, they would see fresh evidence of someone having been there cigarette butts, beer cans.”
Lanigan smiled. “Nice work, Rabbi. I’ll add Begg to my list of Jenkins, Paff, Carter, and seven assorted kids. While chewing the fat with Eban Jennings, my lieutenant, I made as good a case against each of those others. But, of course, they all have flaws. For instance, Begg couldn’t have known that Moose was in Hillson House, now could he?”
The rabbi shook his head.
“So if he had some reason for killing Moose, which you haven’t bothered to mention, by the way, how would he have known to go in there? The normal thing, if he thought someone had broken into the place, was to call the police and ask them to check.”