Stripping Asjiah II (20 page)

She took another puff from the blunt, sat it in the ashtray then gave herself a quick straightening before he walked in the door.

“I thought I told you not to come over here anymore.” There was no authority behind his words; he was mentally and emotionally drained.

“I missed you.”
“Get out of my house Corey.”
“You don‟t really mean that,” She offered the joint

Inhaling deeply he leaned against the cabinet and tried to clear his head. Disappointment was written all over his face.

Seizing the moment, she began undressing him. She grew more and more wound up given that he wasn‟t shunning her advances so she continued to try and massage him into arousal.

The weed was having the desired effect on him that he needed. He wanted to escape what seemed like a terrible nightmare and go back earlier in the week when him and Asjiah were out shopping for baby clothes. He wanted to be with her, to hold her, to feel his son kick beneath his touch.

Reality escaped him and he found himself running his hands through her hair, moaning and saying her name while she performed fellatio on him. on her knees. Ashamed, he pulled up his boxers and fastened his jeans.

“What?”
“Asjiah, you said her name so I asked how she was.” Corey relit the blunt and placed the C annabis between her lips.
“She is in the hospital right?”
“What did you do?”
Corey let out a mischievous laugh, “I did what you couldn‟t do.”
Suddenly he wasn‟t high anymore; before he knew it he had his hands around her throat.
“What did you do Corrine?”
She smacked his hand and pushed him away from her.
“I killed your little bastard CJ. I did what you wanted to do, but was too scared to follow through on. I did this for us.”
He had never put his hands on a female before but when those words escaped her lips, he hit her as if she was a man.
He was crying, weeping inconsolably.
“I did this for us. Why can‟t you see that?”
He looked into her eyes and saw that she really believed what she was saying. She was crazy. Obsessed, infatuated with an idea that would never come to fruition, a fantasy that would never be anything more than a delusion, a mirage in her sordid imagination.
“Get out.”

“Asjiah.”
Even when she was pleasuring him she was still in his thoughts. She couldn‟t take it anymore, she tried to go about this gracefully and ease him into what she had to say but she couldn‟t tolerate being in her shadow anymore.

“I‟m not leaving this time, you can‟t make me. I love you, we‟re in this together.”
He left the kitchen and came back with his gun aimed at her head.

For once, she was quiet. Fear had taken the courage out of her once arrogant demeanor and she was tripping over herself trying to get out of the door.

CJ sat down and put his head on the table. It seemed as though all his scandalous ways, all of his cheating had subsequently led to the unfortunate death of his child.

Grandmame held Money‟s hand gingerly as she thought about her granddaughter.
“She still isn‟t talking, she won‟t eat anything and I‟m afraid she‟s only making herself sicker.”
Bear whimpered as if he was saddened by Asjiah‟s current state as well.
Almost five weeks had gone by since she had been released from the hospital and it seemed as though she was sinking further and further into depression.
They both thought it would be a good idea to remove all traces of the baby from the house;they didn‟t want anything around that would trigger memories or make her upset but when they tried to clean up the nursery Asjiah broke down so they left it as is.
Most days when he would visit, that‟s where she would be; sitting in the rocking chair, cradling a stuffed animal as if it was a child, staring off into nothingness.
Traces of who she used to be were gone. The bright blue skies that used to be her eyes were now cloudy shades of grey. The smile that was punctuated by deep dimples no longer existed. It was stressful seeing her like this but he wasn‟t going to give up.
For days he sat with her in the hospital. Night after night she‟d awake belligerent demanding to know where baby Jai was, asking the nurses to let her see him, and each time he‟d look at her and have to explain what happened which would then result in her crying but he never left; he climbed in bed with her and held her until sadness put her back to sleep.
Eventually the screaming stopped and her pleas turned into silent tears rolling endlessly down her cheeks. He felt as though he was killing her. The constant repetition of his words was like the steady pity pat of bullets piercing her heart.
Angel had told him to watch over her but instead of protecting her he was becoming one of the very people who were tearing her apart. Cannibals like CJ, Cash, Marie, her father; vultures waiting for her to die so they could pick away at her bones. He refused to let that happen, he wouldn‟t allow her to be consumed by the abyss that was so anxiously waiting to take her away.
Money took to the stairs with Bear following behind him and hoped that today would be a better day, that maybe she would say something or acknowledge his presence.
“Hi pretty girl.”
Bear ran up beside her and licked her hand playfully. When she didn‟t return his affection, he bowed his head and retreated.
“Its okay boy,” Money patted the Rottweiler and sent him on his way.
Silence greeted him as usual.
“Caleb told me to tell you what‟s up.”
“….”
“It‟s a nice day out, not too cold, I figure I can give you a minute to get dressed and we can go out and have a snowball fight.”
“…”
Money shrugged and placed his hands in his pockets. “Okay, no snowball fight. What else do you want to do?”
Her hair looked tangled, tussled in big messy curls that hadn‟t felt a comb or a brush in who knows how long. She was wearing sweatpants and a wrinkled, Old Navy tshirt. She was stronger than this. He couldn‟t continue to sit by and let her whither away.
After rummaging through her closet and dresser drawers, he packed some clothes into a Victoria Secret duffle bag and tossed it down the stairs. He loosened the shoe strings on her all black Air Max 95‟s and placed them on her feet after putting on her coat and hat.
He knew there was no way she would walk out of here on her own freewill so he picked her up and carried her out to the car.
Grandma-me was in the living room waiting with Asjiah‟s bag in hand.
Money hugged the lady who he had affectionately named Grandma-C and kissed her cheek.
“Don‟t worry; I‟ll bring her back to us.”

H e hadn‟t slept in days, weeks since the news had been delivered that his son was dead. How could you be born into this world and die at the same time? He felt as if God was playing some cruel trick on him, punishing him for all the things that he had done in his past. Everything had tumbled so far out of control and he didn‟t know how to start trying to put things back together.

They were spending more time together, going shopping for the baby, playfully fighting over names, they were getting back to the basics of just having fun.

But its times when you are at your happiest when your past comes back to haunt you and remind you of the things you are trying so hard to forget. In his case it was Corey.

CJ drank straight from the bottle of Hennessey that was sitting to his left then took a drag from the blunt. He couldn‟t sleep, didn‟t want to sleep out of dread that everything that had transpired would be waiting for him when he closed his eyes. So instead he tried to find peace in the bottom of a bottle or in the aroma of herbal remedies.

He cleaned his gun and thought of how convenient it was for Money to just materialize out of nowhere and pop up like some kind of fucking genie.

He always appeared at the most favorable moments. He was there when they were on the verge of breaking up last summer, he was there when Asjiah and Angel were almost robbed, and now he was there while she was grieving the absence of their child.

Why did she call Money anyway?
Did she still not trust him? Did she think if she had called him instead that he wouldn‟t be there for get through this together and in time, when she was ready, talk about starting a family again.
Odd how something so heartbreaking has to take place in order for youto reevaluate what‟s important to you, one just has to hope that they are able to reconcile before it‟s too late because time favors no one.
It‟s true what they say in regards to your life flashing before your eyes when you‟re about to die, as CJ pulled the receiver back, a single shot rang off and eighteen years went by in seconds.
her? Whatever the reason, her decision was clear. She chose Money.
He shook his head and grabbed the bottle again.
He tried to go back to the hospital, tried to go visit her but each time Money was there. All he wanted was the opportunity to apologize, to be there for her so they could

The shower poured almost scalding, yet
comfortable raindrops over my head.
Anguish was dripping off of me and disappearing down the drain on puffs of hope.
With each tangle he combed through it felt like weeks of sorrow was unraveling and being carried away in streams of conditioner.
He told me he wanted to freshen me up, that he was tired of seeing me in the same clothes, clothes that peeled off of me like extra layers of skin.
I was perfectly still while he undressed me, I watched his eyes ride the curves of my hips, never speeding, taking in every bit of scenery, pausing between golden mountain tops, until finally they rested on lips as sweet as peaches.
But he never touched me inappropriately. Instead he stood behind me in basketball shorts and a t-shirt and lathered my body as if he was waxing an expensive sports car.
He scrubbed my back, squeezing the loofah causing suds to race down my spine slowly trickling down the crack of my ass.
Money got on his knees and took my feet into his hands one by one and washed them the way he had done the rest of me.
He gripped my calf and ascended into heaven rubbing gently over my pearly gates. Sentences from conversations I rehearsed over and over in my head spilled down my thighs intermingling with the creamy body wash. He was making love to me without penetration. Caring for me in a way no one else had.
It wasn‟t that I didn‟t appreciate the way he checked on me throughout the week, or that I hadn‟t noticed how close he had become with Grandma- me, I had become a captive. A hostage within my own mind and I didn‟t know if I could break free, or if I wanted to.
After he was satisfied with my cleanliness, he wrapped me in a towel and sat me in front of the mirror. He divided my hair with a single part and carefully put it into two fish tail braids. I imagined this is what he did for his grandmother after she developed Alzheimer‟s.
Not once out of the two weeks that I had been here thus far did he try to kiss me or take advantage of me. Sometimes we would sit in silence for hours and he would hold me until I fell asleep, other days I would watch as he played video games or we would look at ESPN together and he would explain all the various rules of the sports that I didn‟t understand, but never was he or did he try to be intrusive.
Instead he was patient, thoughtful, and
compassionate. He would stare into my eyes and not say a word as if he was silently trying to break me from the asylum that imprisoned me.
It‟s like I could see all these letters in my brain, but I couldn‟t make them form words, I couldn‟t tell him how I felt.
I watched him as he began disrobing. I guess my thoughts were a little too loud because he caught me staring at him and kindly pushed me into the hallway closing the door behind him.

M y eyes were transfixed on his chest as water glistened across his body cascading in single drops that skated across his stomach. I wanted to kiss the spot that was still damp behind his ear, to run my tongue across the tattoo that spelled out his alias. I wanted to give him brain just so I could taste his unspoken thoughts.

I rose from the bed still hugging the towel that veiled my nudity and slowly walked over to him.
“My bad A‟, I thought you would‟ve been dressed by now. I‟ll go into the other room.”
I intercepted the bottle of lotion he was reaching for and placed it back on the nightstand.
Chills ran across my spine as he placed his hands around my waist.
“What‟s wrong?”
Timidly I kissed him. My lips grazed his seducing him slowly and for a minute we just stood there breathing. Inhaling and exhaling each other.
Lazily our eyes opened and the yearning in my gaze granted him passage into territory that would take us beyond friends.
The cotton that once provided a barrier between us dropped to the floor and the electricity I felt once our bodies touched ignited a flame in me I didn‟t know existed.
I felt like I was floating as he placed his palm on the small of my back and laid me down on the plush pillow top. He kissed his way up from my toes, to the back of my knees, then my thighs stopping once he reached my stomach.
He traced the fading pregnancy line that was once proof of a growing fetus and I could tell he shared my pain. In his own way he embodied my loss. I watched his eyes water as I put my hand to his face catching his tears.

Money
If I tried to explain the way I was feeling I couldn‟t. I didn‟t understand it myself but laying here with her, being so close to the spot where a life once lived, it touched me; overpowered me in a way that was beyond my
comprehension.
I wanted to take away the hurt, erase her scars and repaint her the way she should be portrayed.
Her skin was so soft, scent so enticing; I‟ve imagined this night so many times, fantasies flooding my daydreams of what it would be like but even while she licks my nipples and my dick gets hard, I push all selfish thoughts to the side, tonight is about deeper, switching up his pace lapping my juices like a kitten does warm milk.
I begin to get butterflies, my breathing becomes rapid. I try to retreat towards the head board only for him to squeeze my ass, place my legs on his shoulders and pull me back into him.
It‟s like he has a blue print of my body, instinctively he knows where to touch, how much pressure to apply, and suddenly I‟m moaning and within seconds he finds that spot again, ravaging it until I explode.