Soul Relenter (Soul Saga #3) (20 page)

“You mean that?”

She nodded. “Of course I do.”

Aleco sighed.
“I’m sorry for the way I’ve been treating you. Please understand this has been—difficult for me. I hate seeing you with him.” Accacia looked away, ashamed of herself for betraying him. “But it doesn’t justify my actions. I can’t keep feeling this way—it’s going to kill me. I accept your commitment to Zyle.” He stared at her for a moment and saw the paleness of her cheek and the dim color of her eyes. Aleco knew she was in as much pain as he was. “And I forgive you, Accacia.”

She looked up at his
words. Aleco saw her smile even though her eyes were flooding with tears. “Thank you,” she said. “And I do love you, Aleco. I hope you can believe me eventually. I’ve hated hurting you.”

“I know
,” he said. “I hope that we can—be friends—I guess. I’ll never stop loving you or wanting you, but we need to work together. We can’t keep fighting like this.” Accacia nodded at his words. He stared at her face and watched her features relax in relief. Aleco hated himself for hurting her. He wished he had never left her that memory. Zyle was a lucky man, the luckiest one in the world. “Do you love him?”

Accacia met his gaze.
“Yes,” she said. Aleco felt his heart drop at her words. He already knew she loved Zyle. She would have made love to him if she didn’t, but the knowledge didn’t soften the blow. He wasn’t sure why he had even asked. “He’s my soul mate, Aleco.” She saw Aleco close his eyes in pain at her words. “I—there was nothing I could do. We are meant for each other.”

The Lorunien Tree had recognized their shared soul, but Aleco assumed that meant they had joined their souls together, similar to what he and Accacia had done wh
en they exchanged Soul Catchers. He had a piece of her soul and she had a piece of his. “Accacia, just because he is your soul mate doesn’t mean you are destined for him—it just means you are more compatible. You still have free will. You can still be just as happy with someone else—it doesn’t have to be him.” Aleco secretly hoped she would leave Zyle for him but it was becoming clear she never would. She would have done it already if that was her intent. Aleco knew she loved Zyle more than him. He felt his heart throb at the realization. “Would you ever leave him for me?”

Accacia hugged herself. She had alread
y hurt Aleco beyond repair and now she was going to give him a death blow. She shook her head. “I’m sorry, Aleco.”

Aleco looked down.
“Accacia, he may be your soul mate, a man that completes you on every level, but I have your soul as well. You gave it to me first. I have as much of a claim on your life as he does. So, does that change anything, Accacia? Is he still your fate?” He rose from his chair behind the desk and approached her. He kneeled at her feet and faced her. “Drake and I are exactly alike. We both share the same unbridled anger, something I know you have noticed, and we are both capable of doing unspeakable things. I could be just as disgusting as he is, fall into that darkness easily and accept my faith, but I choose not to, Accacia. I make my own destiny—I choose to be what I am.”

“Please don’t do this to me, Aleco.”

He stared at her for a moment. “You still choose him,” he said quietly. “You love him more than me.”

“It isn’t like that, Aleco,” she said as she shook her head.

“Yes, it is. And that’s fine. If he is the one you want then you should be with him. You choose him and I accept that choice.” Accacia pressed her forehead against his and cupped his cheek. The tears fell from her eyes like a flowing river. Aleco wiped them away. “He is a very lucky man, Accacia.” Accacia nodded but said nothing. She was too overwhelmed to speak.

“I love you so much, Aleco,” she said as
she felt his cheeks with her palms. She kissed the tears falling from his eyes and held him close, knowing how much this conversation hurt him.

“I know you do.” Accacia smiled at him. She was relieved that he believed her. “I am happy for you, Accacia—I want you to be happy. I wish—things were—different, but they aren’t. I wish you were mine. But I accept our fate—I accept the loss.” She sobbed at his words and he wanted to kiss her tears away but he was bound by his oath not to touch her. He wanted her to kiss him so he could return the embrace but he knew she wouldn’t—she was married. Aleco took the Soul Catcher from his capsule and handed to her. “I can’t keep this anymore, Accacia.”

Accacia looked at the stone in his palm then looked back at him. He was returning her soul back to her, forsaking his possession of it. He was severing his ties with her completely. The action made Accacia shake with tears. She didn’t want to lose him, but she knew she already had. She pushed his hand away. “It was a gift—keep it.”

“No,” he said as he handed it to her. “It doesn’t belong to me. This contains your soul, Accacia. And now it belongs to your husband exclusively—I have no right keeping it.” He reached up and opened her capsule and took the Soul Catcher from the necklace. “And you shouldn’t burden yourself with mine either.” Accacia nodded through her tears, unable to say what she fel
t. Aleco remembered all the memories of his past, the ones she had seen, and he asked what he always wanted to know. “Accacia, did the memories change the way you feel about me? Is that why you chose him?”

“No,” she said as she shook her head. She kissed him on the cheek. “It changed nothing Aleco. I love you as much as before. It was hard to watch—but I know you and he aren’t the same. I will never hold that against you.”

Aleco sighed. “I’m that you feel that way.”

“I love you, Aleco,”
she said. “Please tell me you love me.”

“I don’t need to. You already know.”

“Please?”

He grabbed her face and looked into the emerald eyes he adored. The flames in her eyes were absent, completely dead and barren of any light. His fingers grazed her cheek and stopped at her lips, staring at the thin lips he wanted to caress with his own. He remembered the first time he had kissed her and the intense feeling of love he held for her. Aleco didn’t
know when the feelings began. It was as if they always existed. They argued and bickered excessively and she drove him insane with her stubbornness but he loved everything about her—even the annoying habits. He remembered the first time he made love to her and the way she held him to her, whispering his name as he showed her the depth of his devotion and loyalty to her. He was never happier than he was with her, and he knew he would never feel that way again—ever. He realized he was saying goodbye to her—that this was the end. He would never tell her that he loved her again and he would never look at her this way. He was going to move on—they were over. He felt the tears fall from his eyes in sheets like a rainstorm pounding on the sails of a ship. Aleco wished their fate was different, that she was his wife and the future mother of his children, but he knew she would never be. He breathed through the sobs that cracked his soul and forced the words to escape his lips—the very last time he would utter them—forever. “I love you, Accacia. And forever I will.”

Orgoom Forest

18

“You look like hell,
” The Chief said as they walked to the southern border of the forest, the area where the refugees of the neighboring cities had settled under tents and small houses. The guildsmen also occupied the area, preparing for the imminent battle by training the citizens of the Continent in the sword and other weapons. Nolan looked over at Aleco and saw him smiling. “I’ve never seen you look worse—and I have seen you bloodied and beaten beyond recognition.”

“Yes,” Aleco said. “Those were some good times.”

“You’re about to finally move against your greatest adversary. I am finally honoring my promise to you along with the aid of the guild—what could possibly have rendered you so broken?”

The Nature Priest moved forward and said nothing for a moment. Images of he and Accacia flooded his mind. The deserted glade where they had made love under the stars wasn’t too far away from where they were standing and it froze his heart in pa
in. Accacia had denied his love. He didn’t want to live anymore. “I guess I don’t care anymore.”

“Why?”

“I already told you there are worse things than dying, Nolan—betraying someone you love is one of them.”

The Chief wasn’t oblivious to the cause of his pain. He saw Accacia with her husband in
the meeting, holding hands, as they publicly declared their commitment to one another. Nolan had never discussed the scene, assuming Aleco didn’t want to speak of it. Now he understood just how much it troubled his friend, his apprentice. “I’m sorry, Aleco.”

Aleco nodded.

“Now you understand why marriage and child-bearing are strictly prohibited in the guild—they will only cause you pain—betray you.”

“I suppose,” he said. “
You never loved someone, Nolan?”

The Chief stared at him for a moment. “Yes,” he admitted. “A very long time ago. But I realized how
unreal it was. Love doesn’t exist. It is mere infatuation mixed with lust. It was the biggest waste of my time.”

“I don’t agree with that, Nolan, but I understand why you feel that way.”

“Even after what that whore did to you? You’re trying to save her kin from the Void, knowing it’s the only way you two can be reunited, and she runs off with the first guy she sees? She never loved you, Aleco.”

Aleco didn’t react to his harsh words, but let them wash over him in a wave of pain. The union of Accacia and Zyle broke his heart, shattered his soul, and when he thought abo
ut it he felt his body give out. He didn’t want to continue on. “Perhaps,” he said simply.

“I’m sorry, Aleco, but it’
s the truth. The woman doesn’t deserve your undying affection.”

“Do you not remember what she did for me?” Aleco asked. The Chief said nothing, unsure what he was referring to. “She sacrificed herself so she could spare me from the wrath of the guild, even after what I did to her. Perhaps it seems like she doesn’t love me now, but I know she does—she has to.”

“She still doesn’t deserve your loyalty,” he said.

“That’s debatable.”

“What’s your fascination with this woman?” he asked. “Why is she special? I admit she is beautiful and alluring, and a very attractive woman, but that’s all—nothing more. She is weak and a constant liability, has no loyalty to those who matter, and she is conflicted—always bouncing back and forth between emotions and decisions. Why do you care for her?”

“There are many reasons,” he said simply. “And I don’t expect you to understand them. She accepts me for who I am and has forgiven me for my sins. I am identical to the man who tortured her, but she loves me despite that association. She cares for me so much that she looks past our similarities. She is caring and good, always choosing the right decision in the face of overwhelming adversity. I know Accacia loved me with her whole heart—I still believe that she does.”

“I think it’s just because she’s good in the sack.”

Aleco laughed despite the vulgarity o
f his comment. “It doesn’t hurt.” He smiled.

The two men approached the congregation of men along the tents. The peasants
came to Aleco and shook his hand, bowing their heads in gratitude. The Nature Priest expressed his thanks and examined the progression of the plans. Most of the men had mastered the basics of the sword and were motivated to dominate in battle. The guildsmen showed Aleco and the Chief the carts, and they both nodded their approval.

Aleco and Nolan moved away from the cro
wds of people and headed toward a mound in the earth that overlooked the inhabitants before them. Aleco cleared his throat before he spoke. “I need to discuss something with you, Nolan.”

“I’m listening.”

“Devry’s sister lives in the house with me. She doesn’t know that Devry is dead—I have to tell her.”

“And why would I care about that?”

“She is going to want to know who killed him,” he explained. “And I cannot lie.”

“If she comes after me
, I will stab her in the heart. There is no issue.”

“I sincerely hope you are kidding, Nolan. You know I would never let that happen. You will not touch her.”

The Chief sighed loudly. “Then what do you want me to do? Let her attack me? I won’t be useful to your cause if I’m a corpse.”

“I won’
t let her attack you either. But we need to go about this the right way. I suggest you show remorse for what you did, but justify your actions when you explain it to her. Remember, his children are now bastards.”

“Not really,” Nolan said. “They have you, don’t they?”

“I will never be the father they need,” Aleco said. “I’m a poor substitute.”

“I don’t agree. I knew Devry well. He was a better father at a distance. A more selfish man I have never met. You are better for them than he ever was.”

“It doesn’t change anything, Chief, even if you’re right.” Aleco watched Nolan’s face for a moment. “You need to tell her, Nolan. I will be there the entire time and control the situation in case it gets out of hand.”

“It doesn’t seem like I have a choice.”

“Yes, you do, Nolan. And I know you will make the right one.”