Shadow Heart (44 page)

Grace paused, the air of the Stone Hall seeming to press in upon her. If she joined her forces, she risked death. If she didn't, death. If she used her power to dismantle the System in the city she risked betrayal from her new allies. If she didn't, betrayal by her old ones. Death and betrayal on every side, and still that nagging sense that she didn't have a clue what she was doing, that she had ventured so far from her core strengths that at any moment she would be proven a fool and an imposter.

She had never wanted to be a Silent Thunder commander, but the situation had demanded it. She had never wanted to rule a city, though now she saw how naive that had been. She had always imagined handing over power to someone older and wiser after her conquest. Where she had planned to find that person, she no longer knew. For in military conquests, the conqueror rules. She had not conquered Corridor Prime with an army, but she would need that army to seize all the rest. Every city would one day be hers, and she would give them all the gift she had been denied all her life: freedom.

Grace would rule, and she would conquer, but not because it was what she wanted. It was because that was what the situation demanded.

Only one option stood out to her as capable of delaying the web of death and betrayal that spun all around her, and she could see the glint of it in Liz's imploring eyes.

“I would like to speak with General Crenshaw alone, please,” Grace said.

Liz raised her eyebrows, but said nothing as she pushed away from the wall and made for the door. Davian looked as if he might object, but seeing Liz's retreating form thought better of it, and followed her out. Grace couldn't help but smile at his obvious intentions despite the lingering pang of jealousy and regret. His path would diverge from hers now, and she would have to learn to rejoice for him. She just hoped Liz did not break his heart. She would not be an easy pursuit.

The Stone Hall's doors shut loudly, leaving Grace and Crenshaw alone in the hollow expanse. He watched her for a moment in silence, as if still reconciling her presence with reality. Perhaps he had feared her dead and given up hope of ever seeing her again. It brought to mind the face of her father and the way he had looked at her in those weeks after her return from captivity.

“You remind me of him sometimes,” she said. “Dad, I mean.”

“I was just thinking the same about you,” Crenshaw replied. “He always had that tendency to throw himself at any given situation, to do whatever was necessary for the greater good. You lack his impulsiveness, however. You can thank your mother for that.”

She laughed lightly, “One day I will.” A familiar heaviness settled on her chest, and her tone became somber, “Do you think they can see me, from where they are?”

“I do,” Crenshaw nodded. “Love is what tethers us to those who have moved on to the next life, and if I know anything at all about Jacob, he would not let anything stand in the way of watching over you, in whatever way he can. Your mother, too. They would both be proud of you, Grace. I have no doubt about that.”

“I hope you are right,” she said. “I miss him, so very much. They were both taken from me too early, my mother before I even got to know her, and my father just when I needed him more than ever. So many people taken by this war...you have to wonder when it will end.”

“When the last tyrant falls.”

“There will always be more tyrants waiting in the wings,” she said. “There are tyrants in every form of government, fueled by the basest instincts of corruption and greed. So a smart man once said to me.”

“I should be more careful with my words, now that I know you're listening,” he smiled. “Yes. Even if we are victorious against Napoleon Alexander, there will always be another war. We may achieve peace in our lifetime, but it will shatter one day. It is inevitable.”

“Then we must be pragmatic and attempt to mitigate loss where we can. I am tired of all the death and destruction. I don't want any more fathers and brothers and husbands to die. Daughters now, too. I hear that there are two girls in the ranks now training with the Gladius.”

“Yes, inspired by you of course,” Crenshaw said. “Though one lost her father as the Spectorium harried us west.”

The heaviness in Grace's chest clenched around her heart. She knew the girl's pain all too well. “How old is she?”

“Sixteen, I believe.”

“Once this is over, I will be the one to complete her training,” Grace said. “Can you see to it?”

“Of course.”

“This endless cycle of suffering...I may not have the power to stop it. But perhaps I can slow it down. I need the Great Army to do that, and I can't destroy the only thread that binds the generals and rulers to me. You understand that, don't you?”

“Yes,” Crenshaw said. “Your choice is wise, Grace, but that doesn't mean it will be easy.”

“You're right. What I need is to consolidate my power over the Corridor so we can begin to build a rival state to The Alexandrian System and the Imperial Conglomerate. Only Van Dorn stands in my way.”

“And the soldiers at his back.”

“No, they will follow whoever leads them. It is only Van Dorn.” She paused to take a deep breath. “My generals recommend sending an assassin to eliminate him. Liz believes the same, and even volunteered to do it herself.”

Crenshaw pursed his lips into a troubled line, “She seems quite eager to gain your approval and trust.”

Grace cocked an eyebrow, “And you were so accommodating. But of course you don't really trust her...I thought you warmed to her a little too quickly. I would trust Liz with my life, Crenshaw, which she delivered to me several times while we were out there.”

“I don't doubt it,” Crenshaw said. “And for your sake I hope you're right, but I will be watching her discreetly. Often people become what they know you expect them to be, so it is best if she continues to believe she has been accepted into the fold.”

“Clever,” Grace said dryly. “But I'm not wrong about her.”

Crenshaw tilted his head in acquiescence, though she could see he was still not convinced. “In any case,” he went on. “Assassination seems like a World System tactic.”

“Wasn't that the entire premise of the assault on Alexandria?”

“And it failed,” Crenshaw shrugged. “Yet still it was a tactic planned by the Resistance, not by you. Don't get me wrong, Grace, the suggestion may very well work, and if you choose to go that route I will stand behind you. But, all this talk of the System's central computer choosing you...doesn't it make you wonder why? That perhaps it sees a pattern in the data collected on your life that suggests you can alter the course of the System for the better?

“It seems to me that instead of conforming to the ways of the World System, you might try conforming the World System to you. Find a better way.”

Grace sighed, and as she exhaled some of that weight on her chest subsided. She smiled, “I have missed you, General. Thank you.”

“I will help you through this in whatever way I can.”

“I know you will,” she said. “And I also know you have business in Corridor Prime. You have said nothing of the fragment since your arrival. Is there some reason?”

“The fragment can wait,” he said. “If what you said about Aiken is true, the weapon may be lost to us forever, and perhaps that is just as well. I have always been a little troubled by what I might find at the end of that journey. Part of me wishes now that I had never involved any of you in the search.”

“What's done is done,” Grace said. “But we cannot run the risk that the Persians gained the fragment for themselves. Once this is settled with Van Dorn, we will swing east to engage and destroy the Persians, eliminating the threat and gaining justice for our fallen friends.”

Crenshaw again looked perturbed, his eyes vacant as he intoned, “Yes, I suppose that is our only choice.”

Grace watched him for a moment, trying to discern what was going on behind that secretive stare. He had worn that same look when she had first told him about the Persians. Not fear or anger or sadness, as she had expected. More like...curiosity.

“General, is there something you wish to tell me?”

Crenshaw hesitated, obviously trying to decide. But in the end, he merely smiled, “No. Nothing I am yet prepared to say.”

Grace forced down her frustration. This was just one of the general's personality quirks, and she had decided some time ago to just get used to it. She had to trust that he would not keep his secrets if hiding them would place her in any kind of danger.”

“So what will you do? About Van Dorn?”

“I'm not sure yet. But in the meantime I want Prime prepared for battle. Integrate our warriors as much as you can with the Great Army. If it comes to a fight, I want to make sure we win, and win fast. Don't give our generals time to think about changing sides.”

“We will want to choose a field somewhere outside the city to minimize civilian casualties.”

“And we must be prepared if the Spectorium joins the battle. By now Derek Blaine will have heard of my accession and will be even more motivated to see me dead. We will eventually have to deal with him as well.”

“And he will not be the last,” Crenshaw said. “The road to victory is long, but we have a chance now, Grace. A slim chance still, perhaps, but a better one than we could have ever hoped for. Some will come to you on their own now.”

“But not all. It may not be enough to hold when Sullivan's armies get here, or if Alexander comes to take his fortress back.”

“It will have to be enough,” Crenshaw said. “Before we can have peace, all of your enemies must lay dead at your feet.”

“I know,” Grace said sadly. “I used to have romantic notions about the fight for freedom, but no longer. Experience has taught me what war truly is, and it brings only one certainty: that there will be no clean hands in the end.”

D
AVIAN FOUND
L
IZ OUTSIDE
the Stone Hall speaking with a Great Army soldier. His heart jumped at the sight of the dark green uniform, but as the soldier walked away unconcerned, he relaxed. It was going to take some time to get used to seeing his former enemies without reaching for his Spectral Gladius.

But is that what they were—former enemies? Or was this just a break in the everlasting struggle against the World System: a temporary truce while it served both their interests? He actually preferred to think of it as the latter. All the people the Great Army had killed…how could Grace even suggest they team up with them?

“Something bothering you, Soldier?”

Davian made eye contact with Liz, who had turned at his arrival, and immediately forgot all about the Great Army soldier. Pulled into those pools of deep sapphire blue, intoxicated by her beauty in a way he had never experienced before, all he could do was stare. Her clothing at the moment was neutral, neither Silent Thunder nor World System, and accentuated her curves in the most subtle ways. She had been beautiful even when he saw her under the pallor of death. The woman who stood before him now was vivacious and alluring, radiant with the glow of life.

“I, uh—no,” he stammered and cleared his throat.

She grinned at him, eyes alight with amusement, “It will take some time to get used to, but you'll manage.”

Davian felt red creeping up his neck. He must be gawking at her like an idiot! “I'm sorry, I didn't mean to stare.”

She cocked her eyebrows, “I was talking about the Great Army soldier. I assumed his presence put you on edge.”

The floor seemed to be falling away from him, and it took Davian a moment to regain his balance. Luckily, she didn't seem to notice, though that wouldn't matter if he couldn't somehow recover from this embarrassment.

“The soldier? Yes, I—”

“Oh, relax, Soldier,” she laughed musically. “I am just messing with you. I've seen worse stares than yours. Plus, it's not every day you meet a person who has saved your life. Davian, was it?”

“It was—
is
.”

“That a first name or a last name?”

“First,” he replied, swallowing to cure his dry throat. “No last name. Parents didn't much care about teaching me what ours was, and they died before I could ask.”

Her lips turned down in a frown, “I'm sorry.”

“Don't be. They escaped Hell on Earth and I managed to land on my feet. More or less.”

“Lieutenant Commander of an elite fighting force, trusted confidante of a World System magistrate, rescuer of dying women in the Wilderness...I'd say so.”

Davian's heart thumped loudly at the look she gave him every time she mentioned him saving her. It both thrilled and made him uncomfortable at the same time. He averted his eyes and attempted to divert the conversation, “So what did he want? The Great Army soldier.”

Her smile returned, “To bring me a bit of good news. I could tell you, but it would probably be easier to show you.” She stepped forward and took his arm, and before he could object she was dragging him down the hall toward the elevator—not that he
would
have objected.

“You don't like this deal, do you?” she said quietly. “Having to be here, working with the very people who have been your enemies all your life.”