Seeking Evil (Looking Into The Mind Of A Killer Series) (17 page)

“
John
?” His name was little more than a breath, but
something
br
o
k
e
in
him. Or maybe it was her touch, both of her hands now cupped his face, and his control shattered. Eyes squeezed shut, he turned his face into her hand, for the first time, his tears began to escape, spilling hotly onto her palm.

“Oh,
John
…” She pulled him down, kissing his cheeks, his lips, his eyes. “I need you,” he said hoarsely, his lips meeting hers in pure demand now, his big body shaking, his hips jerking against her. He held her head to his, taking her mouth in a kiss that was more desperate than artful. She drowned in him, trying to hold him tight.

She ached to say the words but she couldn’t, not with him devouring her. She could only will him to feel them, even as her heart and body began to rise. He moved over her, desperate passion removing any kind of finesse as he pumped ruthlessly into her. She took him, meeting him, her arms and legs wrapped tightly around him.

He broke the kiss, burying his face in her neck, rising to his knees and lifting her onto his lap to thrust harder, stealing her breath but not her will. “Love me,
Anna
.” She reached for him, sobbing herself when his hands met hers and took hold, stretching her arms over her head. Raw emotions swirled through her
.
She realized then, that was part of what had gone wrong. Even here, at their most open and intimate, he had hidden from her. Closed her out.

She couldn’t shut him or her feelings out if she tried, the truth in her heart spilled free.

“
Yes
.” Thought disappeared in the white heat of their passion. There was only the building tension, the need spiraling through them and finally, the breaking snap when she came apart around him, the clenching grip of her body dragging him with her over the edge, his shout of completion stifled against her skin as she smiled into his hair. They were both shaking this time, his arms so tight around her she could barely breathe, but she didn’t care.
She
realized he was whispering something, words tearing free as if ripping right from his soul…and tearing hers right along with him. “
I've missed you
…”

* * * * *

Everything
was
the same and yet nothing would ever be as it was before he
’
d touched her again. He
glanced
down at the woman in his arms.

Sound was magnified. His breathing roared against his ears. Renewed need coursed through his body like wildfire. Outside the door, the dog let out a worried whimper.
And f
iltered moonlight reflected his arousal, along with her uncertainty. Part of her still didn
’
t trust him fully.
He could see that.
The thought hurt to consider but it didn
’
t kill the craving. Or the curiosity.

“
Are you okay?
”
h
e asked over the thudding of his heart pounding in his ears.

“
Yes.
”
Anna drew in a breath and
tried to steady her voice.
“
Yes, I
’
m okay.
”

He wanted her again. His body hardened at her nearness. While he hesitated, arguing with himself, Anna took the decision out of his hands. She twisted in his arms until she sat on top of him, straddling his rock
-
hard cock.

His gaze slid over her slowly, his body reaching closer to the breaking point. Tension soon became the only barrier left between them.

“
You
’
re so sexy, John.
”
Her arms circled his waist. She leaned close enough to touch her lips against his, her full breasts scraping his taut chest, robbing him of breath. His hands cupped her shoulders, prolonging the kiss, pressing her body closer.

“
You feel so good. It
’
s been so long.
”
She lifted her head to look at him.
“
There
’
s never been anyone since you, John.
”

God, it killed him that
t
his piece of news thrilled him.
His only regret was that he couldn’t answer as honestly.
His hands stroked over her silken flesh. He gripped her hips
as
she pressed her moist and ready body hard against his erection.

He didn
’
t give her time to change her mind. She was wet and ready for him. His fingers stroked her pussy then slipped inside. Anna arched against his stroking, her eyes slitted.

John waited until the climax passed, his throbbing hard penis demanding retribution. He pushed inside her willing body then rolled her over on her back.

“
It
’
s always been good between us
,”
he whispered
in
her ear before his mouth claimed hers once again. His lips devoured hers
,
filling him with a hunger he
’
d denied for so long. One that only she could quench.

“
God, I can
’
t get enough of you.
”

Anna trembled with each stroke, each kiss. Each word. Her legs circled his waist, her fingers digging into his shoulders, urging him on.

The last of John
’
s control slipped away into a long, low groan. His body lunged within her, her kisses and her soft murmurings becoming an intoxicating drug, stealing all rational thought from him. And yet it wasn
’
t enough. He couldn
’
t get close enough.

The fear and uncertainty melted away with each thrust, each kiss. And the world around them was reduced to just the space of one bed, two people. One moment.

“Y
ou feel so good,
”
he whispered once more against her ear, his teeth grazing along the pulse point at the base of her throat. John
’
s hands clutched her thighs, shifting her further beneath his weight, allowing him to plunge deeper within her warmth.

Each thrust gave more pleasure and brought him closer to losing his fragile control. He could feel her body tightening and releasing around his. Watching her pleasure, the pressure within him spiraled out of control. A thousand different convulsions rocketed through his body. Anna
’
s broken whimper mingled with his groan of satisfaction. His hands framed her face. His mouth captured her cries of surrender into a kiss.

She said something so softly that he didn
’
t catch the words. He rolled over onto his back
,
taking her with him. Gathering her close, he waited for the world around them to stop spinning once more.

It wouldn
’
t matter how many times he made love to her
,
it would never be enough. A year was a long time to need someone
this badly
.

Chapter
Eleven

There could be no stopping it now. No turning back. The deed was done. The note sent. Soon, the
whole
world would know their dirty secrets. A light had been shone into the darkness. The monster that lived within its recesses couldn’t survive the warmth of the light
of truth
. Once it was over, the world would see the terror she’d survived. They’d understand. They had to.

But would her family? Would God? She’d prayed. Her knees were as bloody as her body was bruised. She’d done everything she could for God’s forgiveness. It was now up to him.

She’d been strong. She’d outsmarted him. He’d thought her simple, but she’d gotten the better of him.

The knife shook in her hand as she raised it high above her head. She’d waited until he slept to play out the final scene. For a moment, as she considered the consequences, her courage stumbled, but only for the length in time it took to say a tiny prayer then plunge the knife home with deadly accuracy, the first of many times.

A bloody smile touched her lips. She’d won. God had answered her prayers after all. The monster had
finally
met his match.

* * * * *

Anna
sat up in bed, gasping for air
. She
could feel the knife. Her fear. The pain. The terror the monster instilled in her.

“
Anna? Are you al
l
right?
”
John
’
s strong arms tightened around
her protectively
.

Anna
struggled to remember it was just a dream.
She
wasn
’
t
her
.
“
Yes, I
’
m okay.
”

He didn
’
t believe
her
.
“
Are you sure? You
’
re trembling. Come, l
ie
back down. It was only a dream.
”

She
let him gather
her
close and
she
clung to him because he was warm and real. And not part of the dream. John was real, the dream was just part of
Anna's
…no
,
her
troubled past.

When Anna
awoke
again
sometime just before dawn,
she was
still wrapped in John
’
s arms. The dream still fresh and real even with the dawning of a new day.
She’
d needed John
’
s strength. His body, his warmth
,
to make
her
feel human again.

Regrets were everywhere around
her,
making it impossible to remain in bed next to him.

Her body screamed to life along with all of her buried needs. F
or the life of
her
,
she
wanted to wake
John
up and make love to him again. It was always this physical between
them
, which was all the more reason why
she
couldn
’
t stay in bed with him.
What she and John shared had nothing to do with love
. Love was
n’t
this combustible. Love was gentle.
Like the kind of love you shared with Aaron?
The truth mocked her.

Anna
slid out of bed,
gathered
her
scattered cloth
ing, and then
slipped into the tiny bathroom down the hall
. She did her best to
ignore the woman in the mirror
condemning her,
showered and dressed
,
then went in search of coffee.

She had
just started the pot when John found
her
. He
’
d dressed in jeans and nothing more. His bare chest hard and defined. Tempting.

“
You
’
re up early
,”
h
e said from the doorway.

She
turned away from the temptation he represented and poured coffee.
“
Would you like some?
”

He read the gesture for what it was. An attempt at dodging the confrontation that was sure to follow.

John ignored
her
question.
“
What is it? Are you worried that what happened between us will get in the way of the case?
”

Anna
steeled
herself
to say the things
she
needed to say to him.
She
had to define
their
relationship, clarify the boundaries.
She’
d muddied them last night.

“
John, what happened between us last night was great, but it was a mistake. You know it was.
”
She
hated the small hint of pleading in
her
tone.
She
turned back to him.