Secretly Hers (Sterling Canyon) (9 page)

Trip raised himself onto his elbows and brushed hair from her face, then kissed her before rolling onto his back and dragging her against his side. His fingers trailed back and forth along her waist while he stared at the ceiling.

When he’d stormed out of Backtrax, he hadn’t intended to end up at Kelsey’s. Yet here he was, sated and happy. She must be, too, because she wasn’t crying anymore. Then the recollection of her tears nettled.

“Kels?” His fingers toyed with her hair, but he kept his eyes on the ceiling.

“Hmm.”

“Tell me why you were upset earlier.” He turned his head to look at her, but as soon as he spoke, she stiffened and looked away.

“It’s personal.”

“More personal than what we just did?” When he pinched her ass in jest, she swatted his hand.

“Yes, actually.” She met his gaze. “What we just did had nothing to do with feelings. What upset me earlier is all about feelings, ones you’ll make fun of, too. I’m not up to a verbal brawl.”

Trip frowned, irrationally angered by her narrow view of him, despite knowing that was all he’d ever let her see. He rolled to his side and tugged one of her hands to his lips for a kiss. “I won’t make fun of you, I promise. I’m a good friend, just ask Grey.”

“Are we friends, then?” Her skeptical expression burned like a slap to the cheek.

“Of course we’re friends, princess. Now, if you don’t tell me why you were driving around town in tears, I’m going to have to go investigating on my own, starting with one Wade Kessler.” Trip ignored the spark of displeasure that thought ignited.

Kelsey giggled, her smile lightening his heart. “He’d be mighty confused then, because it has nothing to do with him.”

“Then what, or who, is the problem?”

“My sister.” Kelsey blankly stared into space and bit her lip.

“Maura?” Trip curled his arm around Kelsey’s waist. “But you two seem so close.”

Kelsey nodded. “We are. I’m just being petty and stupid.”

“How so?”

“She’s pregnant, which is wonderful news, I know.” Kelsey closed her eyes. “It’s just that, instead of us being mothers together, her family keeps growing while here I am . . .”

She swallowed the rest of her sentence and flashed a rueful grin, but he could see the ache behind her eyes.

“Here you are wasting time with me, right?” He smiled so she knew he didn’t blame her for the sentiment, although it did sting.

“That’s not a slam against you, Trip. Honest. It’s really about me, and whatever it is I do or don’t do that makes me so undesirable.” Little creases formed between her brows, which he promptly kissed.

“Listen up, princess. There is nothing—
nothing
—undesirable about you.”

She shook her head. “I’m not talking about my body.”

“Neither am I. You’re bright, tough, ambitious, generous, and warmer than any woman I’ve met around here.” He squeezed her waist. “If I ever wanted a wife, kids, and a picket fence, you’d be at the top of my list. So quit selling yourself short. You just haven’t met the right guy yet, that’s all.”

About halfway through his pep talk, he noticed a change in her demeanor. Rather than thinking of her own issues, she’d shifted her focus to him. She rolled onto her side, so they were face to face. “Why are you so dead set against settling down?”

“Let’s just say I didn’t have the same kind of upbringing you seem to have enjoyed with your family.” Mason’s face zipped through his mind, stirring up the unpleasantness that had brought him here in the first place.

“Are your parents divorced?”

“No.” His heartless chuckle caught her attention. “They were never married. My dad was already married when he had an affair with my mother. My mom raised me, until she died just before my eleventh birthday.”

Kelsey reached out to touch his cheek. “I’m sorry you lost your mom so young.”

“Thanks.” That Kelsey had seized on that detail rather than the salacious elements of his response only proved what he’d said about her minutes earlier.

“What was she like?” Kelsey slipped her foot between his feet. He couldn’t deny liking the way she kept physical contact with him while they talked.

“Awesome.” He smiled at his memories. “She worked an admin job in a doctor’s office. But at home she was super creative. Always decked the house out for the various holidays. Made a big deal out of birthdays. She wasn’t a great cook, but hers are still the best chili-cheeseburgers I’ve ever had.” He glanced at Kelsey and grinned at her rapt attention. “We lived in a normal house, a lot like your sister’s. My grandfather lived a few blocks away, so he was around all the time. He and I remained close until he died.”

“So that’s why you don’t want to part with that old cowboy hat.” She looked up at the bookshelf, to where she kept his Stetson.

“Does that mean you’ll give it back now?” Trip looked back at the hat. “And by the way, you should keep it upside-down when you aren’t using it so the brim doesn’t get misshapen.”

“Okay. But no, I’m not giving it back yet. You haven’t won the bet.” She smiled, but he no longer had much enthusiasm for that damn bet. “He must have been like another dad, right?”

“Better, because he was more patient than most men. He never had a son, so he loved taking me fishing and hiking and camping. Got me involved in little league and pee-wee football. He thought I was the most amazing thing on the planet.”

“That explains a lot about your ego.” She bit his shoulder in jest, tempting him to bite her right back in more delightful places. “Tell me more.”

“There isn’t more.” He reached over and caressed her hip, but couldn’t shake the conversation from his mind. “I had a really happy early childhood, which made the loss more painful. Something I hope I never feel again.”

Kelsey’s eyebrow lifted, as if something had clicked into place in her mind. “What about your dad?”

“Like I said, I didn’t know him until my mom got diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. She’d never told him about me because their brief affair had ended before she knew she was pregnant, and then she worried the news would destroy his family. But when she got sick, she reconsidered.” Trip felt Kelsey’s hand stroking his arm, the way one would caress a child to make him feel safe. Funny thing, it was working.

“Do you get along with your dad?”

“We don’t fight, but we’re not close.”

“So you didn’t see him much after your mom died?”

“Oh, I saw him. He adopted me.” He avoided Kelsey’s surprised gaze. “I’m sure he thought he was doing me a favor when he moved me into his palatial estate, as if a swimming pool or private school could compare with what I’d lost. Unfortunately, his wife and my half brother resented my existence and made my life pretty miserable whenever he wasn’t around, which was often since he was busy building his empire.”

“That’s horrible. So you’re not close to your brother, either?”

“Understatement of the year, princess.” He quirked a self-mocking smile. “And here you were thinking
you’re
the undesirable one.”

“But if your dad went to the trouble to adopt you, surely he must love you.”

“Not necessarily.” Trip closed his eyes as if he could blot out the upsetting memory that had started playing.

Trip sneaked down the hall toward the kitchen for a late-night snack, starving because of the energy he’d expended taking his eighth grade football team to victory in the season championship game earlier that evening. As he drew near, he overheard Mason talking to his dad in the breakfast room.

“You love him more, just admit it. He’s the kind of son you always wanted—popular, athletic. I can’t wait to go to college and get away from having to watch you drool all over him.”

“Of course I don’t love him more, Mason. You’re my firstborn son. You came into this world wanted by your mom and me more than anything. Trip wasn’t born of love like you were, but he’s my son, too. What kind of man would I be if I turned my back on my own flesh and blood, especially after his mother died? He’s in our life now. You need to make peace with it. Show your brother some compassion.”

Hunger fled as Trip’s stomach clenched and his lungs burned. Despite his awkward, rocky start in this home, he’d begun to believe his dad actually loved him. But now he knew what he’d first suspected. He wasn’t wanted and loved, not really.

“Let’s just say I’ve never been convinced my dad loved me as much as he felt obligated toward me, that’s all.” Perspiration coated his skin, though whether it was due to the memories, the fireplace, or the nearness of Kelsey’s naked body, he couldn’t be sure.

“How could he not love you?” Kelsey tenderly ran her hand through Trip’s hair and along his cheek. “You’re his son.”

“I’m sure you can’t imagine it, but it doesn’t mean you’re right.” Trip flopped onto his back and stared at the ceiling again. “That’s actually what got me worked up today. My dad’s pushing for a family reconciliation. I wouldn’t mind being a better son to him, but I’ve no desire to mend fences with my brother or my stepmom. I tried for years, but they rejected every attempt. I’m done.”

He braced for a lecture about forgiveness and the importance of family. Instead, Kelsey rested her head on his chest and nestled tighter against his body, pliant and warm. “I’m sorry you’re still hurting. Maybe you can find some way to get closer to your dad without dealing with the others. In the meantime, you’re not alone here.”

“Because of Grey? He’s around less often now because of Avery.”

“Grey, and me.” Kelsey propped her chin on his chest. “Whenever you need a soft place to fall, you call me and I’ll listen.”

“I’m sure I don’t deserve that kindness.” A surge of tenderness washed through him, prompting him to pull her in for a kiss.

“Probably not, but I’m notoriously foolish.” She grinned. “Ask anyone.”

He rolled over, cradling her. “And anytime someone hurts your feelings, you call me and I’ll set them straight.”

“Deal.” Her fingers brushed through his hair again, shooting tingles down his neck.

“We strike good bargains, princess.” He kissed her while twisting a lock of her hair around his finger.

“So far.”

Somehow all this mushy talk had aroused him. He didn’t want to think about why, especially when he had a more immediate problem. “I want you again, but since I didn’t plan on coming here, I’m not prepared with extra condoms. Do you have any?”

“Why would a girl who normally doesn’t have casual sex keep condoms?”

Why did the fact she hadn’t had other lovers in a long time totally turn him on? He kissed her shoulder and then her breast. “Are you on the pill?”

“No. Maura told me her doctor made her go off the pill for three months before trying to get pregnant. I’m already thirty-one. Once I meet Mr. Right, I don’t want to have to wait that long to get started.”

He grimaced at being forced to think about babies when all he wanted to concentrate on was sex.

“So I guess I should stop kissing you, touching you.” He kissed her again as he slid his fingers between her legs, which she parted willingly. His body throbbed in response to her hot, wet center. “Kelsey.”

Her hips swiveled, her lips parted on a breathy sigh. “Are you clean?”

“As a whistle.” He kissed her again, his body rigid with need. “I’ll pull out.”

She nodded before pulling him into a hungry kiss. Consumed by passion, Trip quickly pushed himself inside her body, disregarding all caution in deference to his fever to possess her. When she finally cried out his name, it took a Herculean effort to withdraw, but he hoped he’d managed just in the nick of time.

Chapter Eight

Kelsey’s knees bounced so hard they banged against the desk just as she hung up the phone. She wiggled in her chair and drummed her hands on her desk, smiling. So close! Nick Copeland only had one sibling whom he’d not yet convinced of the benefits of selling their property. If she could pull this deal off for Wade, she’d be on her way to financial freedom.

After typing a quick update to Wade, she reviewed the email Mason had sent her outlining his rental unit preferences: two or three bedrooms, two baths, in or near town, updated interior, $3,500 per month rental rate. At that price point, she should be able to find something suitable, but why did he need the extra bedrooms?

That request had surprised her, mostly because she couldn’t remember whether or not he’d worn a wedding ring. Normally she catalogued the status of a man’s ring finger before asking his name. Last week, however, she’d been off her game.

Off her game from the moment she’d agreed to Trip’s sexy proposition. And getting in deeper every day thanks to his nightly drop-ins this past week. Just picturing him caused her to absentmindedly stroke her neck, as if his fingers were toying with her hair.

She smacked her forehead to knock his image out of her brain, then bookmarked a few listings and scheduled appointments to go see two newer ones.

She glanced out the huge picture windows of her office at the cloudy skies hovering over town. Next month, she and her friends would be basking under the brilliant Mexican sun.

While sipping her latte, she studied the website of the Esperanza resort, where she’d booked a three-bedroom suite for four nights.

Sun-Baked Stone Massage and Cucumber Lime Facial sounded nice. Papaya-Mango Body Polish. Avocado Butter Mani-Pedi. Just as she got swept away by the menu of spa treatments, the devil breezed through her office door, throwing her emotions into chaos once more.

“Good morning, princess.” Trip greeted her with a cheerful smile when he came to a stop on the other side of her desk. He glanced around the front room of her office, with its muted Tibetan carpet, cozy chairs, opaque glass lamp, and large mahogany desk—which she knew was a huge step above Backtrax’s decades-old decor. “Wow. Nice digs.”

“Thanks.” From her desk chair, she craned her neck to meet his gaze. He looked as handsome as ever in faded jeans and an untucked blue-and-green plaid flannel shirt.

Her fingers itched to run through his shiny, dark hair. Her lips ached for his kiss. Her eyes raked over every inch of his six-foot-three-inch frame, coming to rest at the animal crate in his one hand and stuffed paper grocery bag in the other.

“Whatcha got in there?” She stood and walked around the desk, happy for an excuse to draw nearer to him, while trying to peer into the darkened interior of the crate.

“A surprise.” Trip’s radiant grin chased away the dreary skies and heated the room, even though she knew she shouldn’t let herself get used to him brightening her days.

He set the bag on one of the two client chairs facing her desk, and then placed the crate on the table in between. Once he’d unlatched the door, he pulled out a tiny gray-and-white kitten. It wriggled in his large hands as he tickled beneath its chin. “Isn’t he cute?”

Kelsey bit her lower lip to keep from chuckling. “I’d have pegged you as a dog person. How will Grey’s dog handle this addition to that tiny apartment you two share?”

Trip furrowed his brow as he shook his head. “It’s not for me. It’s for you.”

He thrust the kitten toward her, dropping it in her hands.

“For me?” Kelsey tentatively took hold of the living fur ball. Her mind raced, but her heart instantly warmed to the pint-size creature. Its teeny tongue grazed her fingers like a fine-grained nail file. She looked up at Trip, whose gentle smile softened an intense expression that caused her breath to catch. She cleared her throat and asked, “Why?”

Trip avoided her gaze while he stepped closer and stroked the kitten’s back. “I know you’ve been a little blue. My buddy Jon’s girlfriend’s cat just had a litter of kittens. I thought you might like one.” His cheeks had turned a bit red, and he cracked his knuckles in obvious discomfort. “It’s cuddly. Girls like cuddly stuff, right?”

Her lips quirked at his awkward behavior. “Some of us do, yes.”

Trip finally looked directly at her, his expression tentative. “If you don’t want to keep him, I can take him back.”

“Oh, just try and take him from me.” She clutched the little kitten closer to her chest, still reeling from the fact that not only had Trip been genuinely bothered by her sorrow, but he’d also hoped to remedy it with this pet. “This is very sweet of you, Trip. What’s his name?”

Trip shrugged. “Up to you, I guess.” He scratched his neck, one side of his mouth curving upward. “I got kitty litter and some food and other stuff in that bag. Not sure what else you need, but this should get you through a couple of days.”

Kelsey placed the kitten back into its crate and faced Trip, trying to square this considerate side of him with the womanizer she’d known for most of the past year. She stepped closer to him, cocking one brow, and lightheartedly poked his chest with her finger. “You know, this clinches it. Your carefree cowboy act is just that—an act. But don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone.”

He narrowed his gaze and spoke with the playful cockiness he’d perfected. “I know you won’t, princess, because that would mean you’d have to disclose our little fling, and I know that terrifies you.”

“Touché.” On impulse, she grabbed his hand and led him away from the prying eyes outside the street-level windows to the small storage room in the back of the office. “Now I want to show my appreciation. Tell me, what can I do for you?”

“Hmm.” He tugged her ponytail free. “First, stop putting your hair in these contraptions. I like it better down.”

“It gets in my way when I work.” She shook it loose then wrapped her arms around his neck. “Besides, I didn’t plan on seeing you today.”

“That makes two of us.” He brushed his hands along her sides, tugged at her hips, and then kissed her. “But I’m not sorry, are you?”

“No.” Kelsey kissed him again, pressing herself against his body. His erection drove into her lower abdomen, making her chuckle. “You’re always ready to go.”

“Like Pavlov’s dog whenever I see you. Hell, it happens anytime I think about you, actually.” He lifted her and sat her on a file cabinet, then kissed her while running his hands up under her skirt along her thighs. “I want you right now.”

His hands stroked her waist and breasts. The low rumble coming from his chest aroused her.

“I’m all yours.” Kelsey spread her legs, locking her ankles behind his hips, wishing she could say those same words in a different context without scaring him away.

As she kissed his neck, he shoved her skirt up to her hips and unzipped his jeans.

Then they heard the front office door squeak open just before Avery’s voice called out, “Kelsey? You back there?”

Trip froze. Kelsey slid off the file cabinet while yelling, “Just a sec, Ave. I’m coming.”

“
Almost
coming, princess,” Trip whispered in her ear, sending another wave of tremors through her core.

Kelsey pressed her fingers to Trip’s lips to silence him and then straightened her skirt and smoothed her hair before grabbing a batch of paper and striding out of the storage room to greet her friend. “Sorry. What brings you by?”

“Emma and I wanted to take you to lunch to discuss Cabo. We’re so excited, although Grey’s a little crabby about it.”

“He can do without you for four days.” Kelsey dropped the paper on her desk. “But I can’t meet for lunch today. I have a client appointment at twelve thirty. Maybe dinner?”

“Okay. I’ll talk to Emma.” Avery looked at the crate and grocery bag. “What’s all this?”

“Oh.” Kelsey had nearly forgotten about the kitten. She brought him back out of his crate. “A rescue kitten. Isn’t he cute?”

“I didn’t know you wanted a pet.” Avery rubbed its leg.

“Neither did I, but he’s just the perfect thing for me right now.” Kelsey brushed her cheek against his soft fur.

“What’s his name?”

Kelsey frowned for a second, and then smiled as it came to her in a flash. “Cowboy.”

“Huh.” Avery’s perplexed expression made Kelsey smile. “Guess that’s as good a name as any.”

“It’s the perfect name for this cat, trust me.” Kelsey longed to share her private joke with her best friend, but she couldn’t. The limitations of her and Trip’s relationship—or whatever—tightened her chest, providing a stark reminder of one of many reasons why she should end their foolishness sooner rather than later. Yet her stomach pinched at the idea.

Besides, she saw no reason to call it quits with Trip until she met someone who wanted something more than casual sex. It wasn’t like a bunch of men carrying little black velvet boxes were lined up at her doorstep.

“I’ll take your word for it.” Avery shrugged. “Anyhow, I looked into a little artisan community called Todos Santos, about an hour or less outside of Cabo. It might be a nice afternoon trip.”

“Sure. I’m up for anything.” Desperate to get Avery out of her office before her friend discovered Trip, she said, “Listen, I hate to rush you, but I’ve got to prepare for my appointment.”

“Call me later about dinner.”

Kelsey waved as Avery waltzed out the door and turned toward her physical therapy clinic. Once Avery was out of sight, Kelsey sagged against her desk and let loose a whooshing sigh. She placed Cowboy back in his crate and called to Trip, “Coast is clear. You can come out now.”

When Trip emerged, he looked agitated and uncomfortable, stuffed back in his snug jeans. “Not a fan of being interrupted.”

“Sorry.” She reached out toward him, then remembered the street-level windows and dropped her hand.

“How about I come see you later tonight?” He stepped closer, but a quick glance at the street outside kept him from touching her. Still, the heat of his body pushed against her skin.

She should say no. She should stop pretending he might actually want more than a superficial fling. She should end this nonsense before she proved her sister right and lost her heart.
A couple of weeks more,
it whispered, despite common sense. “Sure.”

A mix of satisfaction and relief flashed in his eyes before he turned to go, then he paused. “You never mentioned your trip to Cabo.”

“Avery, Emma, and I are taking a little girls’ trip.”

Trip grinned, although his expression grew distant. “Three pretty girls in bikinis. I’m guessing you’ll be surrounded by guys before long.”

Was he jealous? Her stupid heart sped up at the idea. Why was she so prone to spinning fantasies instead of facing reality?

“No wonder Grey’s been grumpy lately.” Trip blew out a breath and then glanced at the animal crate and smiled. “Like the name, by the way. If you want, I’ll watch Cowboy for you while you’re away.”

Aw, Cowboy was their cat—except “they” weren’t really a couple, and no one could know that Trip had given her the kitten.

“That’d be hard to explain. Don’t worry, though. Fee will love to be in charge of him for a few days.”

Trip chuckled. “If she can break away from Lolly.”

He remembered the doll’s name. That had to mean something, didn’t it? Or was she just grasping at anything—
anything—
to turn Trip into the man she wished he could be instead of the man he insisted he was? If only he’d always act like the cock of the walk instead of showing hints of a warm, caring man, she wouldn’t have to fight so hard to keep perspective.

“True.” Kelsey stepped away from Trip and toward her desk, needing space from him to get her head back together. “I don’t mean to be rude, but I do have an appointment in a bit.”

“With Wade?”

“Actually, yes.”

“Is this about that property at the edge of town?” Trip’s gaze narrowed while he placed his hands on his hips.

“Yes.” She crossed her arms. “I know that makes you unhappy, but you’d better resign yourself to it. If it makes you feel better, I’m going to persuade Wade that the design of the project should be in keeping with the Victorian look of town.”

“I’m hardly the only one in town not thrilled with the idea of another Kessler development. When you all hit a roadblock with the zoning board or whatnot, remember I warned you not to count on this one.” The cool tone in his voice sent a shiver down her neck. But she wouldn’t give in so easily.

“And I told you, I know what I’m doing. This transaction involves private parties, not public land. People may gripe, but there’s nothing they can do to stop it, especially when a chunk of that land is zoned for light commercial use.”

Trip opened his mouth and hesitated, as if he was considering saying something important. Ultimately he didn’t. Instead, he lapsed into his playboy persona, winked and pushed open the door to the street. “I’ll see you later.”

Trip handed his carry-on bag to the attendant and then boarded his dad’s Learjet 60XR late that afternoon, eager for takeoff. Things must be dire for Deb to have sent the jet to bring him home right away. Consumed by an abnormal bout of panic, he texted Kelsey to cancel their plans.