Sea of Desire (35 page)

Jared met her defiant stare, then turned on
his heel. He didn’t look back until he’d climbed down the hatch,
and then she was well out of sight.

On deck Merideth sucked in her breath,
letting it out slowly. She let go of the brooch, using her free
hands to hug herself. She was losing her mind. There was no other
explanation. There had been a time when she’d thought herself
falling in love with the captain.

Now, knowing what she did, with all the more
reason to distrust him, she still couldn’t rid herself of those
feelings. If anything, they grew stronger.

At least the desire for him did. She couldn’t
close her eyes at night without him invading her dreams. She
thought of him constantly, excessively. Of how it felt when he
touched her, when he whispered her name... when his body joined
hers.

Stepping away from the rail, Merideth shook
her head. Her blood ran hot and her heart raced. She had to stop
this. To stop thinking of him. But she had five more weeks confined
on board the
Carolina
. And then she’d be with him at his
plantation.

Unless...

Maybe Daniel’s offer was a good idea. Maybe
it was the only thing that made any sense.

“I don’t think you’re paying much
attention.”

“I’m sorry, yer Ladyship. Truly I am. I guess
I just don’t have it in me to study none today.”

“Today?” Merideth tilted her head and looked
at Tim over the book on the captain’s desk... the book he attempted
to read. “You haven’t had your heart in our lessons since we
began.”

“Aw, now that ain’t true, Lady Merideth.”

After closing the copy of Payne’s
Observations on Gardening
, Merideth crossed her arms. She
had been on the
Carolina
only a few days when she’d had the
idea of tutoring Tim. Padriac was busy and had let his sessions
with Tim slide. And since Merideth had plenty of free time, she’d
volunteered to teach the boy.

Nonexistent was a good word for her own
formal education. However, before most of the books were sold to
pay off his debts, her father’s library, begun by earlier
Banistars, had been the best in the area.

Merideth, who’d spent much of her time alone,
had learned to devour the books... the ones she could understand,
that is.

Helping Tim seemed the perfect idea. At least
it did to her.

But now that she recalled it, Tim’s initial
reaction hadn’t been very enthusiastic. He’d given some excuse
about the captain needing him, which had made Merideth annoyed with
Captain Blackstone. She’d been ready to go to him herself when Tim
had assured her he would.

“I shall be glad to talk to him,” she’d said.
“I’m sure he will agree to the lessons.” Actually, she hadn’t been
at all certain.

But Tim had insisted he should be the one to
broach the subject with the captain. And knowing how tenuous was
the trust between her and Captain Blackstone, she’d agreed.

Merideth had been elated when Tim had
approached her the following day with word. The lessons were fine
with the captain. Fine, but apparently he wasn’t enthusiastic about
her tutoring, for Tim sure wasn’t. Reading ahead and making lessons
had been a good way to keep her mind off Captain Blackstone. Now
she saw this diversion threatened.

Her mouth flattened.

“I suppose we have Captain Blackstone to
thank for this.”

“Aye, yer Ladyship. I reckon we do.”

Taking a deep breath, Merideth resisted the
urge to march out of the cabin and head for the quarterdeck. She’d
tell the captain a thing or two. Instead she smiled at Tim. “You
can’t let Captain Blackstone’s reluctance keep you from learning.”
The boy’s expression showed confusion, and Merideth continued. “I
realize I shouldn’t talk about the captain, but he doesn’t know
everything and—”

“That’s just what he said.”

Merideth’s brow creased. “What who said?”

“The cap’n. He said there was a lot a things
he didn’t know. Things ye could learn in books.”

“There you are. He admits it. Then he should
be the first to want you to read.”

Tim screwed up his face. “I reckon he
is.”

“He... But why is he opposed to the lessons?”
She had a feeling it was because she was teaching them.

“He ain’t. I’m the one who don’t like ‘em
none. The cap’n, he said I had to do ‘em.”

“Captain Blackstone said—”

“Captain Blackstone said what?”

Merideth’s jaw dropped open as the subject of
their conversation strode into the cabin. Learning he had forced
Tim to take the lessons was surprising enough, but now to see him
back in the room that he’d avoided for a fortnight bewildered her.
She tried to answer, but found her words shaky. “We were just...
well, we...”

“I was tellin’ her what ye told me about
learnin’, Cap’ n.”

“I see.”

“Yes.” Merideth straightened her shoulders.
She refused to allow him to intimidate her. They might be in his
cabin, but they certainly weren’t alone. “Tim seems to blame both
of us for his lessons.”

“Hmmm.” Jared closed the door behind him and
walked into the room. He rubbed his chin as he leaned over the desk
and flipped open the book. “Seems to me the word should be
‘thanks,’ not ‘blames.’ ”

“My thoughts exactly.” Merideth retreated
behind Tim, laying her hands on his thin shoulders. The cabin
seemed suddenly crowded and the air insufficient for breathing.

“Aw, Cap’n.” Tim twisted about to glance over
his shoulder. “Yer Ladyship. It ain’t as if I don’t like the
learnin’. It’s just... well...”

“You’d rather be scampering about above
deck,” Jared finished for him, smiling when he saw the relieved
expression sweep over Tim’s freckled face.

“Aye, Cap’n, I would.”

“Then I think that’s what you should do.”

“Thank ye, Cap’n.”

“But what of his reading? Are you simply
going to ignore that?” She and Tim both spoke at once, but Merideth
kept going after the boy paused. “I can’t believe you’re just—”

“Wait a minute.” Holding up his hand palm
out, Jared silenced Merideth. “Neither of you let me finish. First
of all, I understand how you feel, Tim. So during the day, you can
carry out your duties on deck.”

“Oh boy.” Tim tried to stand, but Jared’s
hand restrained him. Merideth pulled her own fingers away when they
brushed against his.

“But in the evenings, you report to my cabin
for lessons,” Jared continued. “That is, if it suits Lady
Merideth.” His eyes searched hers questioningly.

“Yes. That would be fine.”

Jared’s gaze lowered to Tim, who had resumed
his chair. “And you have to show more enthusiasm for your lessons,
or they get moved back to the day.” He held out his hand.
“Agreed?”

Tim stuck out his hand. It was immediately
swallowed up by the captain’s. “Ye’ve got yerself a deal, Cap’n.”
Tim wriggled out of the seat. “Can I go now?”

“Aye. Tell Mr. Delany I said you’re to help
with heaving the log.”

It was obvious to Merideth as she watched Tim
hustle from the room that this was one of his favored activities.
It was also obvious that she was now in the cabin, alone with the
captain. And he seemed in no hurry to leave.

Settling into the chair Tim had just
deserted, he flipped through a few pages of the book, reading a
line here and there. “This was my brother’s,” he said when he
finally closed the pages. The heel of his hand rested on the
leather cover while he traced the gold-embossed title with a
fingertip. “He did love his books.”

Merideth, standing safely behind the chair,
watched the almost caressing movement of the captain’s hand. He
leaned forward, his broad back bent. Though he’d tied his hair with
a leather thong, the sea wind had loosened some ebony strands. They
waved down the column of his sun-browned neck, making him appear
vulnerable. Merideth resisted the urge to lay her hand on his bent
head and pull him to her breast.

“I never met your brother,” she said,
swallowing when he twisted to look at her. Merideth caught her
lower lip between her teeth and forced herself not to shift her
gaze away.

He was the first to break the hold of their
stare. When he did, it was to reopen the book, and Merideth let out
a breath. “He was brilliant,” Jared said. “There was a sort of
laboratory in one corner of his room. My mother used to say he
would most likely end up burning down Royal Oak.” He paused to
chuckle. “One time he nearly did. We had to pour water from the
pitcher and the slop jar on the fire to put it out.”

“The slop jar?” Merideth couldn’t control the
giggle that escaped her.

“Aye. At the time it seemed preferable to
fulfilling Mother’s prediction.”

Pushing away from the wall, Merideth settled
on the window seat. It was to the captain’s side, and about as far
from him as she could get in the small cabin. “Did you... did you
work with your brother?”

“Nay.” Jared shook his head. “He’d oft try to
capture my interest with his experiments. But I never could sit
still long enough to understand what he found so interesting about
plants.” He seemed to prove his restlessness now by standing and
walking around the desk. He leaned his hip into the scarred wooden
corner. “There was many a time I feigned interest, though,” he said
with a grin that made Merideth’s stomach flutter.

“You must have loved him very much.”

The smile faded, leaving but a ghost of his
dimple. “Yes, I did.”

“I don’t know anything about his death,”
Merideth said, the words rushing out before she could stifle them.
His expression changed, from sad to something she couldn’t define.
He pushed away from the desk and came toward her, his pace
reminding her of a stalking animal. It was all she could do not to
bolt to the side and run from the cabin.

When he loomed over her, Jared smiled again.
“I came below to see if you’d care for a walk above deck. The day
is exceptionally clear.”

“A walk?” She’d strolled on deck every day
since they’d left Land’s End, and he’d never accompanied her. Why
now did he feel the need? Before Merideth could begin to find an
answer, he took her hand and drew her up till she stood nearly
plastered to his body. His scent of fresh sea air and musky male
drifted about her.

Her breath caught. Of its own accord her head
tilted up; her lips parted. She could only stare into the depths of
his black-fringed green eyes. His kiss was not unexpected. His slow
descent gave her plenty of time to pull away. His tongue filled her
mouth, swept the deepest recesses till a moan escaped her.

As always, the fire of desire started not as
a slow burn but an explosion of emotion. An explosion that had her
ears buzzing. Her limbs felt weighty and weak, and it was with
great effort that she dragged her arms up and around the strong
pillar of his neck.

When she did he jerked her closer, pressing
his hard strength into her softness.

“Oh God, Merideth,” The words seemed dragged
from his soul as Jared tore his lips from hers. His hand cupped the
back of her head, tangling in the thick fall of golden curls, and
he pressed her to his heart.

Closing his eyes, he swallowed, trying to
steady his breathing. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. He was
supposed to be in control. His plan... his damn plan depended upon
gaining what information she had. Seduction was the only way open
to him.

It should be fairly easy. He was no fool. His
effect on her would be obvious to any but a green boy... which he
definitely was not. He had to no more than touch her to spark her
reaction. But what he hadn’t counted on was the way she drew him
into the web of passion.

The visit to his cabin was calculated. A
moment of togetherness after two weeks of holding himself at bay—a
fortnight of watching her and wanting her. The kiss was an
afterthought.

Or perhaps it was the moment he first lost
control.

Regardless, the impact of his desire hit him
instantly, like a squall on a calm afternoon. Within seconds of
touching her, all thoughts except having her fled his mind.

It was not his usual way of dealing with
women. But he found nothing about Merideth Banistar was usual.

Leaning back, he separated her from the front
of his shirt. Her reluctance to leave caused a tightening in his
chest. When he gazed into her guileless blue eyes, he found them
shiny as crystals with unshed tears.

“I don’t want this,” she whispered, her words
a soft feathering of air on his chin.

“Don’t you?” His fingers bracketed her face,
his thumb catching the tear that finally slipped through the
gold-tipped lashes to start a path down her soft cheek. “I think
this is the one thing you do want. The one thing we both want.”

“Nooo...” Merideth shook her head. His hands
loosened, allowing her freedom, but he bent his head, catching her
lips with his. ‘Twas but a slight brushing, but the contact sparked
an eruption of emotion.