Riding and Regrets (12 page)

Jody agreed. “I know, I know. It’s all just been a mind-fuck. I don’t know how I managed to have sex with Elena, but I did. There’s no doubt Prissy’s mine.”

Noel finally got to ask one of the questions that had been preying on his mind. “How can you not know? I mean, you had sex with a woman. You had to.”

“I know that, but I don’t remember,” Jody said, stressing the last word. “Elena was always trying to get me to have sex with her, but I knew I was gay. She didn’t do anything for me, even though she was pretty. Sixteen and horny as hell, I still couldn’t envision having sex with a girl. No one knew I was gay, though. I couldn’t tell. I lived in this small town in Texas, and my dad was the preacher at the Pentecostal church there in town.” Jody frowned and rubbed his temples. “There was a party…”

When he didn’t go on after a few minutes, Noel debated prodding him or letting him be.

He went with the latter, because Jody looked like his head was hurting him.

It was becoming apparent to him that something bad had happened in Jody’s past. Noel knew full well how things could haunt a person. At least he remembered all the bad shit that had happened to him.

What must it be like to not know something as important as how you helped make a child?

Chapter Nine

Prissy ran along the stalls, singing a song she’d learned in daycare. The stalls were empty, but Jody still wanted her to learn caution. “Honey, remember, if there were horses in here you could spook them, and they’d maybe get hurt or hurt you.”

Well, he felt like he’d just rained all over her parade when Prissy stopped and turned to him, her bottom lip quivering. “Aw, honey,” he sighed, crouching and holding his arms out to her. “Come here. Daddy ain’t trying to be mean. I’m just trying to teach you some ranch safety rules.”

The idea of one of the horses freaking out, of Prissy getting too close to a stall and getting bit or worse scared the shit out of Jody. He wavered between worrying he was overprotective and not protective enough.

Prissy ran into his arms and Jody closed his eyes as he hugged her. How in the world had he lived for twenty years without this kind of deep and abiding love?

“I just want to keep you safe,” he whispered.

Prissy sniffled and he heard her whimper ‘Mommy’, which was happening less and less often in the month and a half she’d been with him. It still broke his heart, but honestly, Prissy didn’t seem to miss her mom as much as he’d have thought. Melissa had told him that Prissy had often been shuffled around among Elena’s friends while Elena partied. He guessed that was true, and it made him ache to think of his baby girl being handed off like that. It also made him realise how lucky he was that Melissa had brought Prissy to him, even though Melissa hated his guts.

She hadn’t wanted to take on the responsibility of raising Prissy, and neither had anyone else in his family, since she’d been born illegitimately. Crazy in today’s age and times, but that’s the way they were.

Melissa had made sure he knew he was dead to her and the rest of his family. Jody had figured as much, and it’d contributed to the lost feeling he’d had, but with Prissy in his life now, he had a purpose.

And with Noel in his life, he had hope, too. A different kind of hope than he had in regards to Prissy.

During the weeks they’d been seeing each other, Jody had found more and more to like about the man. Noel was kind and funny, generous to a fault, and he was a bone-meltingly good lover.

He also still had nightmares about that Clive fucker. Jody wondered if there was more to Noel’s nightmares than he was telling. More to the reality that had caused the nightmares he was sure Noel still had at times.

Jody stood up with Prissy in his arms as someone entered the barn. He turned and saw Troy walking his way. “Hey, Troy, what’s up?”

Troy waved at Prissy, who ducked her head and giggled. Jody thought she had a little crush on the big man.

“I was just coming to see what you two were doing. Figured you’d be in town with Noel, since it’s your day off.” Troy clapped his hands then held them out to Prissy.

Prissy wiggled and Jody handed her over. “Unca Twoy, I wanna see the swings.”

“See ’em or play on ’em?” Troy asked her. He had helped Jody put together a swing set the week before, and Jody had never had a clue there were so many pieces to those damned things.

“Play, silly,” Prissy told him. “You and Daddy push me.”

“Troy might have things to do,” Jody said, looking at him.

Troy hitched one shoulder up. “Nah, not right now. The mobile home is going to be delivered in an hour or so, then the company is doing the set-up. You and Prissy should be in your own place by tonight.” Troy waggled his eyebrows at Jody. “You going to have a house-warming party?”

Jody’s face warmed up as he got just what kind of party Troy meant, and it wasn’t one that would include more than Noel. “Uh, if Noel’s up to coming out, sure. If he wants.”

“Have you even asked him?”

“No, I didn’t want to push.” Jody sighed at the exasperation on Troy’s face. “What, man? I’m trying. I don’t know how to do a relationship thing, but I’m giving it my best shot. I don’t want to scare him off by being too needy.”

“Wanting to spend the night with your boyfriend isn’t being too needy,” Troy said.

“Noel’s Daddy’s boyfweind,” Prissy chimed in with. “He’s fun. I love Noel.”

The thing was, Jody suspected he might love Noel, too, at least a little. It scared the crap out of him. For all he knew, Noel didn’t intend to make Ashville his permanent home. He hadn’t had anything else moved there, not that Jody knew of, and Noel still lived with Gertie and didn’t talk about moving out on his own.

Troy gave her a high-five. “He’s a cool dude, huh? Why isn’t he out here today?”

Prissy looked at Jody. “I dunno.”

“It’s his Saturday to work,” Jody explained. “And after the daycare closes, the whole staff has to do some extreme cleaning because Gertie just found out today that there’s some awfully contagious virus going around making kids and grown-ups pretty sick.”

“That stinks, doesn’t it, pretty girl?”

Prissy bobbed her head. “Let’s go swing.”

“Maybe you should have lunch first, hmm?” Troy glanced at Jody.

“Yeah, we need to eat or Drake’ll come out here and we’ll be in trouble.” Jody checked his watch. It was just after noon. “After we eat, you can play on the swings.” He wished there were kids on the ranch for Prissy to play with. She got so bored on her own, and Jody spent most of his time playing with her. Troy and the other guys helped out, as did Rocky and Jen. Really, Prissy had a big, loving family surrounding her.

“You get those papers back all official now?” Troy asked him as they walked to the house.

“Yeah, it’s all handled legally.” The relief was huge, knowing that Prissy couldn’t be taken from him now. The judge had signed the custody papers and they’d been filed and recorded. Prissy was his baby girl, and that was that.

“She’s on your insurance, too. Carlos made sure.”

“You guys have been great,” Jody told him. “Seriously, I…” Oh, he maybe shouldn’t say it because he was going to sound like a kid with hero worship going on, but Troy looked at him and Jody found the words spilling out. “I really admire you, Carlos and Will. Y’all have gone so far out of y’all’s way to help me and Prissy, and y’all have shown me more about being a man, about being a good person, period, than my own folks ever did.”

Troy blushed, a sight Jody had never seen before. “That’s— Thank you, Jody. I know you came from a hard upbringing. It’s obvious in how you don’t talk about it, or how none of your family comes around or contacts you. They’re fools, all of them. They don’t deserve a son like you, or a brother like you.” Then Troy gave him a one-armed hug that made Jody’s eyes burn with unshed tears. “You’ve grown up a lot in the past couple of months. I think we’re all pretty proud of you.” He let go of Jody then hefted Prissy up in the air. “And we’re all crazy about you, Prissy!”

“Y’all checking into having some of your own?” Jody dared to ask.

Troy tossed Prissy until she was laughing wildly, then he settled her on his hip. “We aren’t that far along yet. Still in the talking it out stages.” Troy put Prissy down. “Run on inside and see if Drake needs some help.”

“Okay!” Prissy ran, her little legs carrying her faster every day, it seemed to Jody. Troy didn’t follow so Jody waited with him.

“We have to consider how our relationship would affect any kids we had,” Troy explained. “There’s some friends of ours back in Texas, they’re a triad or ménage, I hate both of those words. They’re just… They all love each other, okay?”

“Yeah, okay.” Jody didn’t see a problem with people loving each other. There was already too much hate in the world, so love was a good thing in his book, even if it didn’t fit the societal definition of love. “They got kids?”

Troy took out his wallet. “They have twin girls, and last I heard, there’s bets on Annabelle being pregnant again. I’d heard her swear it wasn’t ever happening a second time, but who knows?” He opened his wallet and flipped to the plastic covered pictures. “That’s the twins, and that’s Justin, Annabelle and Evan behind them. They had these pictures taken professionally, and I guess they got some strange looks, but no one’s gonna argue with Annabelle.”

Jody admired the men—both were handsome in their own ways. Annabelle was the star of the picture, besides the twins of course. She was a beauty, and she had a look about her that conveyed her intention to kick your ass if you crossed her. “I bet she’s something. Those are cute babies.”

“They’re about Prissy’s age now, I guess.” Troy closed his wallet and put it back in his pocket. “Anyway, I know there’s some concern about those twins catching shit over having three parents. As much as Annabelle and her guys try not to flaunt that there’s the three of them, people know. You can’t hide something like that for long, just like all y’all figured out me, Carlos and Will are together. We didn’t go makin’ out in front of anyone.”

“But it’s obvious y’all love each other,” Jody said. “It’s nice to see, actually.”

Troy chuckled and started towards the big house. “Yeah, maybe for you and people here with open minds. Outside of this ranch, though, that’s another issue. If we had kids, what would they have to go through in school and town?”

“You could home school ’em.” That was what Jody would like to do with Prissy, because Ashville’s schools weren’t all that great from what he’d discovered while researching them. He couldn’t do it and work, though, so she was going to have to go to the public schools and he’d just have to supplement her education.

“Not sure that’d be doing ’em any favours. They’d have to be out in the world at some point.” Troy loped up the steps.

Jody followed and thanked Troy when he held open the door for him. “Sure they do, but not right off the bat. Maybe when they were old enough to understand things,” Jody continued on with his semi-argument. “When they could comprehend that people are different and some people are just out and out assholes, and those people need to be ignored.”

“I heard a bad word,” Will called out from the living room. “That’s a dollar, Jody. At this rate, with all the cowboys cussing, we’ll have enough money to retire on in a year.”

Jody laughed at that. “We gotta cussing jar in the bunkhouse too. Got over a hundred bucks in it so far. I’m not sure what we’ll be doing with it when it’s full.”

Will came into view, stepping close to the opening of the hallway. “Y’all have a hundred bucks in it and it’s not full? What size is that jar? Or is it a fifty-five gallon barrel?”

Jody pretended to think it over. “You know, that’s a good idea. We could use something that size, what with the bunch of foul-mouths out there.”

“Except you and Prissy will be moving out soon.” Will beamed at him. “Drake’s already planning a house-warming party for you. Why are you blushing?”

Jody took off his hat and glared at Troy when the big oaf started laughing. “’Cuz someone has a dirty mind.”

“One of the many reasons I love him,” Will murmured. “And I’m pretty sure Drake wasn’t planning on the same kind of party you and Noel will be having. Is he coming over tonight?”

Troy guffawed and Jody rolled his eyes. “Why are you guys so interested in my sex life?”

“Because we’re pervs,” Will said happily. “Come on, Drake and Prissy have just about got the table set. Eat, then you can tell me about your plans for the night.”

“Like I’d share that!” But Jody laughed as Will took him by the arm and led him to the dining room.

* * * *

It wasn’t much, maybe, but it was his and Prissy’s, or it would be once he paid the note off in fifteen years or so. Jody blinked and his mind spun. Prissy would be eighteen by the time he had the place paid for, or close to eighteen. He couldn’t imagine it. Would they still be living on the Mossy Glenn?

A knock on the door caused his heart rate to spike up, but when he answered, it wasn’t Noel on the outside. It was Duke, stopping by to tell Prissy goodnight. There’d been a steady stream of cowhands coming by, all of them wanting to see Prissy before bedtime. She’d won the hearts of everyone in the short time she’d been with them.

“Come on in,” Jody said.

“Thanks.” Duke stepped inside and Jody closed the door. “Hey, kid, I wanted to tell you, I’m sorry I tried to hit you.” Duke’s cheeks turned ruddy. “I don’t remember doing it, but Frankie told me yesterday. You know I wouldn’ta ever done that if I’d been thinkin’ right.”

“I know.” Jody still thought Duke was different, angrier since he’d been hurt. “It’s okay. I wasn’t ever mad about it. Come on, Prissy’s in bed, but she’s awake. She’s waiting for Noel to come tuck her in when he gets here.”

“She likes him a lot, huh?”

“She does.” And she wasn’t the only one. Jody showed Duke to Prissy’s bedroom “Hey, Prissy, look who’s here to tell you goodnight.”

“Duke!” Prissy hopped up off the bed and ran to Duke. “Stowy!”

“She’s had a story from everyone who came by.” Jody found the fruit bat book, Prissy’s current favourite, and held it out. “This one okay?”