Play It Away: A Workaholic's Cure for Anxiety (11 page)

Bonus Points

Fix Micronutrient Deficiencies

For a few months, I was feeling unusually fatigued. I had no idea what was causing it. I was getting good sleep, I was eating healthy, and I was exercising regularly. I did some research, and found that I had a ton of symptoms for Vitamin B-12 deficiency: I felt mildly depressed, I had very little motivation, I was short of breath, my brain was foggy, and my fingers occasionally went numb.

Vitamin B-12 is in meat, fish, and certain dairy products.
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The normal range for B-12 is between 500 and 1,000 pg/ml (picograms per milliliter), and if your levels fall below500 pg/ml, your brain ages twice as fast. In other words, if your body isn’t absorbing enough B-12, your mind rapidly deteriorates and stops functioning properly. Holy Guacamole!

When I got tested for B-12 deficiency, the results showed that my levels were
200 pg/ml
— less than half of the minimum amount my body required. Even though I was eating meat almost every single day, I was still massively deficient.

I immediately began taking Vitamin B-12 liquid drops — 1,000 mcg every day, sublingually (under the tongue). Within one week, I could already feel a difference. I was less foggy and more energetic. When I got tested again for B-12 a month later, my levels had shot up to
529 pg/ml
. I was back in the normal range.

A few of my friends took micronutrient deficiency tests, as well. None of them had B-12 levels as low as mine, but they
were all deficient in something. One found he was deficient in magnesium. Another was deficient in selenium, while another was deficient in potassium. All of them took measures to correct their deficiencies, brought their levels back up to the normal ranges, and felt like new people. Their minds were clear and sharp, and their energy went through the roof.

Below is a list of three common deficiencies that
tend to amplify anxiety
. If one were so inclined, one could actively work on ingesting an ample amount of these nutrients for 30 days, while assessing their anxiety levels every week. That might prove to be a worthwhile experiment, but only if one were so inclined.
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1. The Vitamin B club
   . I was deficient in B-12 (methylcobalamin, found in meat), but other people might be deficient in B-2 (riboflavin, found in yogurt, spinach, almonds, and eggs), or B-5 (pantothenic acid, found in avocados, mushrooms, and sweet potatoes), or B-6 (pyridoxal phosphate, found in tuna, chicken, turkey, and cod). Fortunately, it’s possible to get the recommended dose of all the B vitamins by taking a B-complex pill once per day. Check out the resources below for the brand I take.
   
2. Omega-3 Fatty Acids.
   You can find omega-3 in salmon, fish oil, hemp seeds, flax seeds, and chia seeds. I take 2-4 servings of Nordic Natural’s cod liver oil pills each day, which contains a solid dose of the three fatty acids: EPA, DHA, and ALA.
   
3. Potassium.
   Easy deficiency to develop, but just as easy to fix. Good sources of potassium include sweet potatoes, bananas, oranges, tomatoes,potatoes, and beets.
   

Everyone should get tested for micronutrient deficiencies at some point. There are plenty of reasons why this is a smart move, but for me, the most obvious reason is because of
our soil.
The most nutritious foods we eat absorb their nutrients from the soil they grow in, and the purity of our soil has been severely compromised through hyper-aggressive agriculture and mining practices. So even if you are eating a natural and well-balanced diet, you could still be lacking in some of the key nutrients your brain and body need in order to function properly.

One final note on deficiencies: It’s possible that your gut isn’t absorbing nutrients properly. If you suspect that’s the case, you might consider taking a probiotic supplement to introduce more healthy bacteria into your stomach. You can also get more healthy bacteria by eating fermented foods, like sauerkraut and kimchi.

FREQUENCY:

Once you’ve been tested for deficiencies, ingest an ample  amount of the desired nutrients (via food or supplements) for 30 days. Get tested again and re-assess.

COST:

Varies, depending on whether you’re ingesting food or supplements. $80 for the B-12 deficiency test at Any Lab Test Now. $400 for the micronutrient test. I know, I know - it’s expensive.

DO IT NOW:

Research the nutrients in this chapter to see if there’s anything you might be deficient in. Visit anylabtestnow.com to find a location nearby. Schedule an appointment to get a micronutrient test.

RESOURCES:

[None of these resources are affiliate links. I will not earn money if you decide to purchase anything I suggest.]

Any Lab Test Now (anylabtestnow.com)
You can get tested for deficiencies in just a few minutes at Any Lab Test Now and have the results emailed to you within 48 hours. You can also get micronutrient tests at your doctor’s office, but (depending on which state you’re in) they will probably make you jump through a few hoops first.

Vitamin B-Complex Caps by TwinLab (playitaway.me/vitaminb)
This covers all of your bases for the B vitamins. These pills are free from common allergens, like soy, yeast, barley, wheat, and lactose.

Nordic Natural’s Arctic Cod Liver Oil (playitaway.me/fishoil)
I take 2-4 servings of these pills per day.

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If you’re a vegetarian or vegan, you’re likely deficient in B-12.
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I know I sound coy, but that’s because it’s important to remain skeptical of my suggestions. Just because I say something might work doesn’t mean you should run out and buy a bunch of supplements. You need to do your own research first! Granted, it’s very unlikely that any of these nutrients will harm you if you ingest them. Still, it’s best to remain cautious about putting things into your body, especially when you know nothing about them.

Release Pent Up Frustration

The doctor gave me a relaxation cassette. When my blood pressure gets too high, the man on the tape tells me to say ‘SERENITY NOW!’
Are you supposed to yell it?
The man on the tape wasn’t specific.

—
S
EINFELD

My anxiety changed my behavior. I usually joked around with people, but suddenly, I was walking on eggshells in every interaction. I was submissive, agreeable, and excessively nice. I didn’t realize it until a couple friends told me I had to stop worrying about hurting their feelings.
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This new behavior was partially caused by how isolated and lonely I felt (I couldn’t stand the thought of my friends shunning me), but mostly, it stemmed from a fear of confrontation. I was trying to avoid an emotional breakdown because I knew if someone screamed in my face or tried to fight me, I’d probably fall apart on the spot.

I masked how I felt for months, always trying to maintain poise. Even when I was out with a group of friends, I just faked my enthusiasm by mimicking theirs, doing my best to hide my frustration.
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I didn’t talk to anyone about how I felt because, for better or worse, guys don’t really talk about feelings.

When guys hang out, we joke around and mess with each other. Our interactions are light and fun, and excessive displays of emotion (especially fear or sadness) are viewed as weak and emasculating. We usually don’t discuss feelings because it’s always been off-limits, so it makes us really uncomfortable. Almost every man has been raised to value how he
thinks
more than how he
feels
, and because a lot of our feelings aren’t easy to rationalize, we block ourselves from expressing them.

While I was putting a clamp on the feelings I didn’t want to show, I was unknowingly screwing up all the others. Every emotion I experienced felt clumsy and filtered. My face started twitching as my body begged me to release the frustration that was bubbling over.

One night, I received a phone call that sent me over the edge. I don’t even remember what the call was about. All I know is that right after I hung up, I went into my bedroom, shut the door, wailed on my mattress until I collapsed, then wept for 10 minutes. I slept like a rock that night, and felt like a new person the following morning.

The next day, I sat down with a friend I was really upset with. I’d been holding in my frustration with them for so long, simply to avoid getting into an argument. I talked to them face-to-face and admitted that I’d been angry but reluctant to speak up. I didn’t verbally attack them; I just asked them to hear me out, explained how I felt and why I was upset, then asked how we could fix the situation.
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I repeated this process with a few more people that I was frustrated with. We didn’t always resolve our issues, but having a levelheaded conversation, where we both tried to empathize and understand each other, released a lot of the tension we both felt. And usually, we bonded and grew closer just by talking.

It was really hard to initiate those uncomfortable discussions, but it was completely worthwhile. It helped me realize that I was doing things that were upsetting those people too, which I needed to fix in order to make things right. Those realizations saved some of my most important relationships from falling apart.
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You can’t be happy and awesome and stoic all of the time. Period. It’s just simply not possible. Life is not always great; sometimes it’s really tough. That’s why you were equipped with a full spectrum of emotions; they help you get through the hard times. Stop resisting the expression of your being and listen to your body. Screw perfection, screw poise – just let go. If you’re sad, give yourself permission to bawl. If you’re angry, go beat something to a pulp (preferably a pillow or cushion), then yell at the top of your lungs. Keep doing it until you’re exhausted.

When you’re relaxed and composed, go speak with the people who have been upsetting you. Be honest and vulnerable, hear each other out, and keep talking until you find a solution both sides are happy with.

Feel better? I thought so.
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FREQUENCY:

As needed. This isn’t a one-time technique that will cure you; you’ll need to practice expressing your emotions on an ongoing basis (even when you’re not watching sports).30

COST:

Free, or extremely expensive if you like to destroy property.

DO IT NOW:

What are you feeling? Go into your bedroom, close the door, and express it. Who are you upset with? Go have an honest discussion with them face-to-face.

RESOURCES:

Stress-releasing exercise.
You can go to the batting cages, take boxing classes, do yoga… Any physical activity that allows you to release your emotional tension.

Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most
(playitaway.me/difficult)
If the thought of being mildly confrontational toward another person sends you into a panic, you ought to read this book.

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I remember a friend offering me a snack, then making a joke about how I never shared. I was so paranoid that he was accusing me of being a bad person that I apologized profusely while he stood there looking confused.
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I distinctly remember being in a bar one night, looking around the room and feeling so depressed that I was participating in the weekly ritual of poisoning myself with alcohol, just so I could have superficial interactions with people I’d probably never see again. And it was my fault. My priorities were screwed up. I was working all the time, and never having guilt-free play with my friends.
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If you’re not sure how to approach someone like this, check out the book
Difficult Conversations
by Douglas Stone.
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Some people are impossible to talk with directly. They might be emotionally abusive, or maybe they just never listen to you. If that’s the case, you might want to consider talking to a therapist instead   
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  If you’re feeling suicidal and can’t express how you feel to the people around you, dial 1-800-273-TALK. Calls are free and confidential, and the line is open 24-hours a day.

T.R.E. - Trauma Releasing Exercises

Note from Charlie: This next technique is going to sound bizarre. I don’t blame you if you’re skeptical, but it worked really well for me and there’s a good amount of research to back up the benefits of T.R.E.

One of the weirdest effects of anxiety is how much tension builds up in your body. I couldn’t even take a deep breath because my stomach always trembled, like it was being stretched to its limits. Relaxing felt physically impossible.

My body was so tense because I was constantly in fight-or-flight mode. Every day, I was producing the energy needed to survive a life-threatening event. The problem was that this event was
in my mind
; it was imaginary and it never took place. I had all this excess energy that wasn’t being released, so I became extremely high-strung.