More Than Just One Night (The Selwood Sisters Novellas) (5 page)

Cora ignored Lily’s comment. “Having a relationship
means that at some point we’d have to see each other naked with the lights on,
and he’s not my husband. Paul had to accept the changes in my body; he was
responsible for some of them. His babies caused the stretch marks and the
caesarean scar, and then of course, you don’t really notice the effects of
aging when you see someone every day and it’s a gradual process, and you’re
aging yourself at the same rate.”

“I know what you mean,” Lily said. “I know
I’m younger than you, but I couldn’t imagine letting anybody but Daniel see me
starkers.”

Cora shook her head. “No, exactly. I don’t
think I could cope with Alex’s reaction.”

“If he really likes you, though, he won’t care,
will he?”

“I don’t know about that. I’m not convinced.”
Cora flicked through the files on her desk, looking for the one she’d need for
her first meeting of the day. “And besides, we’re on my home ground here. This
is where I live and work. It’s where people know me, and those same people knew
Paul.”

“You could go to Sydney to see him, and then
no one would have to know about him.”

“But I really don’t have the time for
travelling backwards and forwards. I have a business to run. He’s busy too, but
he’s happy to come here whenever he can, only...he doesn’t see why we shouldn’t
be open about our relationship.”

“I have to admit, I don’t get that either,” Lily
said. “It’s not as if you’re going to be cavorting with someone unsavoury. I
mean, I know he’s a lawyer, but there are worse things he could be.”

Cora smiled. “True. He could be a tax auditor.”

“Or a politician,” Lily said. “I agree with
him. You don’t need to hide him away. No one is going to think badly of you for
having a relationship after all this time. You must get lonely.”

Cora sighed. It was true. Apart from her
sister, she didn’t have any friends to speak of. She’d lost touch with her
single friends after marrying Paul, and he wasn’t big on socialising, so the
few friends they’d had as a couple early on, drifted away — apart from Eric,
but the two men had known each other forever. She’d got on with Eric’s wife
Dinah, but only because it meant she had someone to talk to when they were all
together. She’d hardly seen Dinah since Paul died, and she only saw Eric on
business matters.

She sighed. “I don’t have time to think about
being lonely. Work keeps me occupied.”

“I know,” Lily said, shrugging. “But still.”

Cora shook her head. She was flattered that a
man like Alex wanted to see her again.
What middle-aged
woman wouldn’t be?
But flattering was all it was.
Realistic, it wasn’t.

Cora put the final touches to the first
proper meal she’d cooked in ages — proper in the sense that she’d made every
part of it from scratch, even the puff pastry for the Beef Wellington — while
Alex sat at the table, watching her. He’d offered to help, but it was weird
enough having him there in the house she’d shared with Paul, without seeing him
doing anything so domestic as helping her prepare a meal.

She’d offered to cook for him, not because
she wanted to impress him with her rusty culinary skills, but because of her apprehension
about being seen around town with Alex by people she knew.

It was now four weeks since they’d had dinner
at the Clarendon, and he’d phoned her several times. Every couple of days, in
fact. Before long she’d anticipated his calls, waited for them, her stomach
somersaulting at the sight of his name on her phone’s screen. Then, a week ago,
the calls had stopped. She’d assumed that he’d come to his senses and given up on
her. She’d been okay with that. Well, she’d
told
herself she was okay
with that despite every cell in her body calling her a liar.

But then he’d phoned and apologised,
explaining that he’d been working day and night on a major case and with the
bulk of the work out of the way, he was taking time off and wanted to see her. As
hard as she’d tried to treat the call casually, Cora had failed. At the sound
of his voice, her heart had banged against her ribs like a feral cat caught in
a cage. With her heartbeat reverberating in her ears, she couldn’t even think
of refusing to see him. She couldn’t, and she didn’t want to.

“It’s just about ready to eat,” she said now,
turning to face him and receiving a jolt, once again, because the sight of him
did that to her. Every time.

The table was set. He’d already opened the
wine and there was nothing to do but serve it up. Oh, and pray that she hadn’t
lost her touch and it would be edible, maybe even impressive enough to justify
inviting him. How embarrassing if it turned out to be ghastly.

Later when they were, to Cora’s relief,
enjoying the meal, Alex said, “This is a nice house. Have you lived here long?”

“Yes, years. My husband and I designed and built
it together. We started off in a very small place and then, when the business
was doing well and we could afford it, we bought this block of land. It was a
few more years before we could start to build, but we knew it was going to be
our forever home, so we didn’t mind the wait. Well, not
too
much. It was
worth waiting, anyway.”

“You must have been very happy here together.”

“Yes.” She swallowed. “Very happy.”

“You don’t mind living here alone?”

“But I don’t live here alone. Well, yes, I’m
the only one here most of the time, but it’s the kids’ home as well. Fern comes
home during the holidays, and for the odd weekend when she can. Justin will be
back when he’s finished his travels. So, it’s still a family home.”

“Right. I see.”

“What kind of home do you have? I bet it’s an
apartment, one that’s all minimalist and masculine.”

“It’s a house. A renovated Victorian
terrace.”

“Really?”

“I have to live somewhere suitable for my
daughter, remember? The garden is only small, but it’s big enough for us, and
it’s shady, so she can play outside safely. I hope you’ll come and see it.
Soon.”

She balanced her knife on the edge of her
plate and lifted her wine glass, saying, “Alex, we need to talk.”

“I thought we were talking.”

“I mean, about your expectation that I’ll fall
into a relationship with you.” She sighed, shaking her head. “I didn’t mean to
give you the wrong idea by agreeing to see you tonight. I still believe it wouldn’t
work.”

His gorgeous grey eyes regarded her steadily.
“Okay, you said we need to talk, so let’s talk for real. You explain to me why
it wouldn’t work. Don’t just tell me that and expect me to accept it. Let’s get
all your reservations out on the table, and then we can move past them.”

She lifted her chin. “What’s the point in me
talking about my concerns if you’re already planning to dismiss them as if
they’re unimportant?”

“I won’t dismiss them out of hand. I’ll
listen, I promise, and I’ll consider each one of them on its merits.”

“You sound like a lawyer.”

His mouth twitched. “Is that your first
reason?”

“No!” She took a drink, but what she’d meant
to be a sip turned into a gulp. At this rate she’d polish off the bottle on her
own, and a fat lot of sense she’d make then. She put the glass down. “Okay, for
a start, the age difference is a major hurdle for me.”

“Why?”

“Isn’t it obvious?”

“No. If we’re supposed to be getting
everything out in the open, you need to explain that statement.”

“All right. Since you’re making me say it,
I’m not a young woman any more, and I don’t have a young woman’s body. I have
wrinkles and cellulite, and nothing is where is used to be.” She could see that
he was struggling to keep a straight face now. “Don’t laugh at me!”

“I’m not laughing at you, I swear. But I’m
amused by the picture you paint of yourself, because it’s so far from reality
that it’s comical.” He shook his head. “You’re beautiful, Cora.

Exasperated, she said, “I’m not talking about
the person you see when I’m fully clothed. It’s easy to hide things like that. The
only time you saw me naked the lights were off.”

He was silent for a long moment, then he
cleared his throat. “That’s not strictly true, you know.”

“What?”

“I woke up at first light.” He shrugged. “I
would have got up and closed the curtains, but I didn’t want to disturb you. It
took me half an hour or so to get back to sleep. What else did I have to do but
look at you? I’ll say it again. You’re beautiful.”

“Oh my.” She covered her mouth with her hand,
too horrified for words.

“So, you see, that argument holds no water
and we can disregard it. Now, is there anything else about the age difference
that bothers you?”

She tried to drag her thoughts into order. “Well,
yes. You could be with a younger woman.”

“I could.” He sighed. “I was married to a
younger woman, and believe me, there are advantages to dating a woman over forty.”

“Like what?”

“Well, would you wake me up in the middle of
the night to ask me what I’m thinking?”

Her mouth twitched into a smile. “No.”

“No, and you wouldn’t clog up my phone with
nonsensical texts either. You’d only message me when you had something to say.
I know you wouldn’t whinge if I had to do some work instead of going out,
because you’d probably have some of your own to do. And you’re dignified.” His
face twisted as if he was remembering something distasteful. “You wouldn’t want
a public screaming match, especially over something trivial, would you?”

“God, no. I can’t think of anything worse.”

“Have I answered your question?”

“Well, yes. But my daughter’s boyfriend is
older than you.”

“Is he?” He shrugged. “I’m sorry, but I can’t
do anything about that. Still, I think your issue is with him rather than me.”

“Yes, that’s true.” She nodded, blowing out a
breath. “I have a big problem with him and he knows it.”

Alex returned to his meal. “This Beef
Wellington is great, by the way.”

“Thanks. I’m glad you like it.”

After several moments, he said, “So, is that
all? Have we finished discussing your concerns?”

“No.” She hesitated, picked up her glass
again and sipped at it. “You see, I hate the thought of people gossiping about
me, especially my employees. I have an image to maintain.”

“Right. Well, nobody likes to be subject of
gossip. Why would people gossip about us, though?”

“Not about you. The fact that you’re younger
than me is only part of it. I’d probably feel the same way about being seen
with any man, no matter who that man was, to be honest. Paul was well-known and
well-liked in this town, and I’m still thought of as his wife.”

“Do you still feel like his wife?”

Slowly, she said, “Yes, I guess I do, despite
the amount of time that’s gone by.”

He stared at his plate for a moment before
raising his eyes to meet hers. “Maybe you’re not as over your husband’s death
as you thought you were? Did you feel guilty after our night in Sydney? Did you
feel as if you were betraying him?”

“No,” she said quickly, then she frowned, considering
his question. “Well, yes, I suppose there was some guilt mixed in with
everything else I felt, if I’m honest.”

“Please be honest with me. Do you still love
him?”

This felt too personal. She didn’t want to
discuss her most deeply-buried emotions with this man, as much as she liked
him. She didn’t know him well enough. It took time to develop the level of
trust she’d need to feel able to talk about such private feelings.

She sighed loudly. “I care about what other
people think of me. I can’t help that.”

He took the change of direction in his
stride. “And you really believe that people will judge you for dating again
after six years of living alone?”

“Some of them will.”

“Do those people matter?”

“Some of them do. Especially my children and
my sisters.” As she spoke she remembered Lily encouraging her to see Alex, and
Gwen might react the same way, but her children wouldn’t, she was sure.

“Your family would want you to be happy,
wouldn’t they?”

She didn’t answer his question. Instead, she said,
“I can’t afford to get distracted, or sidetracked. I’m trying to run a
business. People rely on me for their wages.”

“I understand. But a little relaxation makes
for a healthier mind, don’t you agree?” He looked at her expectantly. “Surely
that’s a good thing?”

He did have a point. And if that relaxation
included fantastic sex — her eyes closed as memories overwhelmed her — then it
could be a very, very good thing. With a little gasp, she pushed those thoughts
back into their box, and opened her eyes. She saw his triumphant smile, and
okay, it did seem a waste to let him fly back to Sydney when she had this big,
empty house, and a big empty bed. And good, thick curtains on the windows which
she would definitely close before they went to sleep so that no early morning
light could sneak in and wake him.