Miyu's Wish (2 page)

The clouds disappeared, and a beautiful damsel rose before me, addressing a crowd of people with a gracious smile. She made my heart jump, and I reached out for her—but no, I had already been nudged in a different direction. I was now staring into the jubilant, heart-shaped face of a Japanese pop artist, her sweet, cooing voice like a spell on her enchanted audience. I could feel her song rising from my mouth…

A match will come
, the thought sang again. A nun—perhaps the prettiest I had ever seen—walked past me, a line of doting kids
prancing behind her. A woman in white appeared, administering medicine to a sickly man as others called out her name. A blonde beauty dressed in a shimmering gown sashayed forward, smiling and posing before a storm of flashing cameras. I could feel her gown press tightly against my breasts and her shoes dig into my feet. I was becoming confused.

Follow your heart
, the thought resounded. A flurry of images swept past me—a mother, an ice skater, an author, an activist—each drawing me in from all sides. I felt the serene exhaustion of giving birth, felt the biting chill in the air as I twirled toward my awaiting partner, felt the sharp ache in my hands after typing all night, felt the fierce satisfaction of fighting for a noble cause.

I didn’t know who I was anymore. I was all and none of them. I was being torn apart.

Now rest and embrace your destiny.

I was capsizing, free-falling into an empty abyss as silhouettes of countless girls called out behind me. They had all slipped through me like puffs of air; but no, there was still a figure drifting upward. We collided. I felt a sharp, striking pain, then an electrifying tingle of wonder as I folded into her image. My body shook, and I squealed, clutching myself into a tight, tender ball.

And then everything went black.

I awakened with a soft murmur, slowly rolling onto my back and stretching gingerly in all directions. I licked my lips, feeling as though someone had just massaged my mouth with a sweet, everlasting kiss. I giggled as I forced myself awake.
What crazy dream did I have last night?

A sentimental melody about choices and destiny was playing on my phone, urging me to rise. I did so slowly, sitting up and gazing around my pretty room. It was a sanctuary of pink and white, with a stately piano in the corner and a shiny dresser standing across from my bed. A crystal that hung from the balcony window dappled everything in sprinkles of color—I couldn’t imagine a happier way to begin the morning.

I focused my attention on the closet, knowing I needed an extra cute outfit for my big day. But I felt distracted, as if I was forgetting something important. I bit my lip carelessly, sliding my tongue against the bottom row of my teeth as I pondered the strange feeling.
Had my teeth always felt that smooth? Been so tiny?

I grabbed a lock of my hair and twirled it around my fingers thoughtfully.
My beautiful hair…had it always been this long? This black?
A sharp chill seized my body as I glanced at the mirror. In place of my reflection stood a boy, his hair redder than flame, staring at me through the glass. I screamed, falling backward and banging my head against the headboard.

“Miyu, sweetie, are you OK up there? You need to hurry into the shower or you’re going to be late!”

“Yes, Auntie Mari,” I heard myself say, feeling the sting of tears.

I shook my head and dashed to the mirror.

I saw myself, a pitiable little thing, staring outward with desperate, shimmering eyes—for behind me watched that hideous stranger.

Chapter Three

I
 
jerked my face away and stumbled backward, shutting my eyes as two indistinct voices beckoned within me. One felt coarser, manlier, like shards of glass prodding and poking in all the wrong places. I wrenched myself away from it, falling instead into the softer, creamier embrace of the other. A tantalizing melody drizzled over me, entangling me, and I breathed it in desperately like sweet perfume. I trembled and felt my body sink to the floor, the voice sliding off my lips in a sweet, heartfelt murmur. The voice was my own.

I returned to the mirror. My reflection stared back as it always had, my eyes like two azure planets staring back in relief. The boy was gone. Only an illusion. A bad dream. I was still myself and always had been.

But I had to be sure.
I pressed my face up to the mirror and examined my teeth—the two rows of neatly arranged stones
gleamed brightly. I licked them with my tongue, ran my fingers over them, and then attempted a smile. It was the same one I had always known.

I then turned away and removed my pink nightgown. My body was now completely exposed, and with a small shiver, I turned myself around.

My petite, doe-eyed reflection watched me intently; my hair was the color of midnight, with gentle, silky tufts hanging over my breasts like furry feathers. I drew closer, sweeping the soft locks away and letting them fall against my back. I then spun around, studying my dainty bosoms from all sides, and finally gave a satisfied sigh of affirmation.

I again drew closer. My skin was creamy with a hint of peach, my lips pink and delicate, my fingernails both trimmed and polished. My ears bore the diamond earrings I had placed there the night before.

The bedroom door swung open, and my aunt bounded in, staring down at me incredulously. Indeed, I was sitting naked on the floor, inspecting my toes.

“Miyu! What are you doing? We have to leave in forty-five minutes! Get in the shower!”

My bottom lip trembled in protest, but before I could say anything, she was already dragging me down the hall and toward the bathroom. She then slapped my butt just hard enough to hop me into the already-running shower. I squealed; the water was too cold.

We stared at each other as I shivered unhappily.

“First day jitters?” she finally asked. “Only natural, I suppose. I’ll choose your outfit. You just get yourself clean.” I looked at her quizzically; she seemed vaguely different today, but I wasn’t sure why.

Aunt Mari paused, noticing me still pouting, and sighed haplessly. “I know you miss our old home, but you’ll find your place here in due time.” She then caressed my cheek with a tender smile. “I promise.”

I looked at her guiltily. “It’s just that your new job, the move, it happened all so fast.”

She nodded. “It’s been tough on both of us, believe me. But getting to school late isn’t going to help matters, either. So get going on that shower!” She gave me a sympathetic glance and then hurried out of the room.

I closed my eyes and let the faucet’s spray massage my back. I was feeling a little better, but the boy in the mirror…who was he? The water was now nearly scalding, but I shivered.

I finished showering and then examined my complexion in the mirror. I had done the same procedure countless times, but today I gazed at the collection of moisturizers, exfoliates, bases,
and foundations with uncertainty. I spread on a light moisturizer and then tentatively reached for a primer.

“Honey, we’re almost out of time,” my aunt warned as she stuck her head into the bathroom. She saw what I was doing and, despairing, walked in.

“This is all you need, sweetie,” she said softly, taking a bottle of foundation and dabbing a little onto an applicator. I watched her gratefully as she gently spread the liquid strategically across my face, her long, brown hair swaying with her graceful movements like reeds in the wind.

“You see how natural that looks? For skin as nice as yours, you don’t need much.” Her own face was smooth and fetching, and I nodded, trusting her judgment.

“All done,” she said, admiring her work. “You might also consider a dash of blush, but for now, just hurry and get dressed!”

I thanked her and scampered to my room, knowing I still had a lot to do. I first opened a drawer and selected an appropriate pair of panties—
kitties were good for a first day, right?
—and then began dressing into the outfit Aunt Mari left on my bed. It was a simple but attractive ensemble, with a white, tight-fitting blouse and a blue, ruffled skirt. A fancy, black belt struck a sense of balance between the two garments, while a pair of dark leggings accentuated everything perfectly.

But I bit my lip, looking myself over and over.
Everything seemed fine, but…

“Miyu! Hurry!” Auntie called from downstairs.

I sprang to the bathroom. I still needed to do my hair.

Just minutes later, we were zooming through the neighborhood and skidding onto the main road. I bounced around in the adjacent seat, contemplating the morning and day before. Twenty-four hours ago, all I had been able to think about was my first day in the eighth grade—now I was imagining things and questioning my sanity.

My thoughts drifted to more pressing matters, however, as we entered Beckett Middle’s parking lot. Swarms of kids were bounding out of vehicles and making their way inside the main building, while others remained chatting with friends near the front entrance. I smiled hopefully at the sights and sounds, and unbuckled my seatbelt.

“Have a wonderful day, sweetie,” Aunt Mari said, kissing my cheek. “I’ll be back to pick you up around four.”

“Thanks Auntie,” I replied, grabbing my pink backpack and hopping out of the car. “I’ll be OK!”

Aunt Mari’s eyes suddenly bulged forward. “Miyu, did you put on a bra this morning?!”

I felt my bosoms through the tight fabric of my blouse. Two prominent bumps pushed back.

I bit my lip.
I knew I had forgotten something.

Chapter Four

I
 
quickly abandoned my mortified aunt and scurried inside the school, whirling about looking for a bathroom. I shuddered under the gaze of my prospective classmates, feeling as if I held some terrible curse they were sure to discover.
And maybe I did.

“How could you have forgotten your bra?!” Aunt Mari had exclaimed. I now shook my head despondently, remembering again that boy I had seen in the mirror.

I finally spotted a bathroom and dashed inside. Amazingly, it was empty. I immediately went to work stuffing thin strips of tissue into my blouse in the hopes of covering my more notable features. As I fumbled with myself, two girls suddenly walked in and laughed harshly.

“So you’re
that
kind of girl,” one said dryly, her electric gaze sizing me up and down.

My face blanched. “No, no, it’s not like that,” I insisted, swiftly pushing my blouse back down within my skirt. “You see, I—”

The second girl chuckled. “Oh, leave the little thing alone. She’s obviously new here.” She smiled and walked over. “You are new here, aren’t you?”

I nodded cautiously.

“I thought so,” she grinned. She was at least a head taller than I was, with hazelnut eyes and shoulder-length, brown hair. She wore a white and yellow summer dress with dark tights, and possessed an air of easy confidence. I had never seen her before, but she seemed familiar somehow, and I felt a drop of sweat roll down my pits. “I bet you’re a sixth grader, right? Their classes are usually on the other side of the building.”