Messed Up (28 page)

“Who are all these people,” I wondered aloud, “They look like they belong in middle school.”

“Close,” Levi smiled at my observation, “Most of the incoming freshman class should be here. You could say this is our little welcoming party.” His tone sounded sardonic, a far cry from hospitable.

We reached the living room where Levi’s friends lounged on the chairs and sofas, looking something like VIP’s with box seats at a sporting event. Camille spotted us and got up to hug me warmly. Her greeting inspired a couple of the other female counterpart to Levi’s entourage to embrace me as well. It did not go unnoticed that Mandy ignored me completely, her body slung over Calvin in a chair. Noah stood up instantly so that Levi and I could sit down on the couch.

“Camille,” Levi said, “Get me a beer.”

“I’ve got it,” I interjected, patting Levi lightly on the leg and standing again.

“Let me show you where they are Chels,” Camille said grabbing me by the hand and pulling me toward the kitchen. She retrieved a bottle of beer from the restaurant sized refrigerator and handed it to me, “How’s everything,” she asked conspiratorially as I positioned myself on the kitchen counter.

“Same, I guess,” I shrugged. We went over the details of the past several days that we hadn’t seen each other. Apparently Levi hadn’t made any middle of the night visits to Camille’s for several weeks. I wondered if this turn of events signaled my virgin status was not long for this lifetime.

“Has Levi told you about what is going to happen tonight?” Camille asked as she began filling her trademark silver flask with a combination of one part Redbull to three parts vodka.

“What do you mean?” I asked, confusion spreading across my face.

“I guess not,” she took a swig of her concoction, “Try not to let it bother you too much. We all go through it and most of us make it to the other side just fine. This has been going on for decades. Just follow my lead,” she turned away from me, avoiding my eyes as she reentered the living room.

Levi and his band of followers were all standing around, many of them filing out the backdoor, with freshman boys at their heels. I handed Levi his beer, and he barely acknowledged my presence, but for a slight nod of his head. He whispered something to Camille and they both glanced over at me. “Stick with Camille, okay Punky,” said Levi before kissing my check quickly, and retreating out the backdoor.

Slowly I became aware that the only people left in the living room were the female counterparts to Levi’s male followers. They looked strange to me without their male equivalents. Camille made her way to the center of the room, pulling me with her. Mandy moved to flank Camille on her other side.

“Okay bitches,” said Camille in a loud and commanding voice, “Tapping time. Remember one each, and they’d better be cream of the crop or they’ll be dropped
stat
. Meet me in the clearing in ten.”

Like ten year olds beginning a scavenger hunt, the girls immediately fanned out into the rest of the party. My eyes followed Mandy who went directly to a thin girl with long straight blond hair and tapped her on the shoulder. She was standing with a group of girls all looking awkwardly at their hands. Her beauty clearly set her apart from her clique, who were generally overweight, greasy haired, and wearing indistinctly out of fashion clothing. A look of dread spread across her face as she followed Mandy out the back door of the house. Her friends, whom she’d left behind, looked pleased and jealous in equal parts.

“What is this all about?” I asked Camille, still confused.

“I’ll explain it later. Follow me.”

Camille handed me one of two large canvas bags. We walked out the back door of the house and past a large pool illuminated by dark blue lights. We made our way to the back fence of her property and through a gate. As we walked into a small thicket of trees, the night became quiet, aside from the hushed giggles of the girls walking just ahead of us.

We reached a small grass covered meadow in the middle of the trees. The older girls stood in a circle, while the younger, recently
tapped
girls huddled together in the middle, excitedly hugging each other and looking thrilled. They immediately fell silent when Camille entered the circle. She dropped her bag at her feet, so I did the same.

A broad smile appeared on Camille’s face, “Okay ladies,” she called out in a booming voice, “You’ve been tapped.” The girls went wild with cheers, and more hugging and bouncing. Camille let the excitement go for a couple minutes before speaking again, “This means you have been selected to be a Delancey Girl. For those of you who live under a rock, The Delancey Society is the most sought after frat at St. Jacobs.”

What the hell? I thought. Since when did high schools have fraternities? I was beginning to feel like I’d just fallen down a rabbit hole.

“
Being a Delancey Girl” explained Camille, seeming to answer my thoughts, “is like an all-access pass to the best parties and hottest guys at St. Jacob. Only the best of the best are allowed in and we only accept people who want to be part of our little group. So you have two choices at this point. Number one pledge your dedication and unyielding commitment to the Delancey Society tonight and have a guaranteed spot in the most respected clique at school for the next four years,” she paused for effect and then continued, “Or take door number two and leave now.”

Camille was silent as she looked from face to face. No one moved. I watched the thin blond girl that Mandy had tapped carefully. She wore an expression of extreme trepidation that I could completely identify with. It was like she knew in her brain that the right thing to do would be run for her life, but she couldn’t move a muscle because she was already in too deep.

“
That’s what I thought,” Camille said when nobody moved, “Alright then, just one more little test before you are official. Everyone strip down to your bras and panties.”

Some of the girls started undressing immediately, I figured these were the girls with older sisters who had warned them, but the majority of them stood frozen staring at Camille, waiting for her to say she was just kidding. That it was only a joke and they were all going to be treated to ice cream sundaes instead. Not even.

“
You have until I say ten,” Camille’s voice had turned cold, vicious even. As she began counting slowly the girls began rapidly pulling off their clothes. My eyes glanced over to the blond girl who now looked like she was going to be sick. I wanted to comfort her. To tell her it wasn’t going to be that bad, but of course I had no idea how bad it was going to be. Levi was behind this strange ritual, so it was not going to be good.

When Camille stopped her counting all the girls stood in their minimally clothed state staring at her, many with genuine dread in their eyes.

“
Line up side by side,” she commanded, and they did exactly as they were told. I watched as she walked down the row inspecting each of them, like she was choosing between prom dresses, “Not bad,” she finally said, “Now, time for your final inspection. You’re up Levi,” she yelled.

My head swung around as Levi entered the clearing with James and Calvin at his side. I noticed several small, embarrassed smiles flash across the faces of the nearly naked girls. Levi made a point of walking directly over to me, kissing me gently on the mouth, and whispering, “Don’t worry, I’m keeping you,” into my ear with a smile. He held my hand as he forced me to follow him as he walked down the line of girls. Some of them smiled at him eagerly, while others looked down at their feet. When we reached the thin blond, I noticed she was shivering. Levi stepped back to look at the group as a whole, “You pick Chelsea,” he said not looking at me, “Two of these girls need to go,” my eyes flashed over to Camille who looked stunned.

“
What the fuck!” I heard Mandy practically scream from behind me.

“
Shut it, Mandy,” Levi roared. “Go for it Chelsea. Pick the two weak links,” Levi said smiling. The girls giggled politely.

“
Okay,” I stammered. Slowly my eyes skimmed the group. This is a test, I told myself, and there is a right answer, a correct way to do this, “Her,” I said pointing to the most attractive of the group. I figured she didn’t need to be part of any weird club to improve her popularity; she’d do fine on her own. She looked dejected and more than a little insulted, “And her,” I indicated the trembling blond. I couldn’t tell if I was just projecting my own distorted feelings onto her, but she seemed to be begging me with her eyes to be eliminated. An audible gasp spread through the crowd of girls and I could see Camille smile out of the corner of my eye.

“
You constantly amaze me, Chelsea,” Levi said looking pleased with me, “I knew you’d choose correctly,” he winked, “Alright, you heard her. You’re out.” The two girls wandered off in the direction of the house putting their clothes back on as they went.

“
Ladies,” Levi purred, flashing one of his heart melting smiles, “I’ll look forward to meeting you all soon,” he bent down to kiss me before disappearing into the trees.

In a rational world where feelings align themselves nicely with one’s circumstances, it would seem that the last thing I would be experiencing at that moment would be pride. What did I have to feel proud about? That I had a boyfriend who used intimidation, isolation and shame to keep me fastened to his hip like a Snap-on tool belt? But as I stood there, in front of a pack shivering freshmen in nothing but their underwear, I knew every one of them envied my position. It was the first time in my life that I felt like the popular girl, and though the high didn’t last long, I could feel the power rising in me like a swarm of killer bees.

A low mumble of voices began as soon as Levi had made his exit. The barely clothed freshman began whispering about their two rejected cohorts as the Delancey Girls on the outer circle surrounded Mandy, their faces aghast at the recent turn of events.

“
Holy shit, girl,” Camille whispered in my ear, “I had no idea how serious he is about you. This goes way beyond my expertise. He’s got plans for you.”

“
Why’s Mandy so angry?” I asked, deciding to pose one question at a time, although my list at this point was getting pretty lengthly.

“
For starters you just ousted her sister,” Camille laughed.

“
Her sister!” I exclaimed, “Shoot, she’s going to kill me.” Of course, I thought, I had seen her tapping that thin blond. I just didn’t put two and two together. Crapitiy, crap, crap, crap.

“
Don’t worry about it,” Camille said bending down to retrieve two bottles from the duffle bag and handing me one, “After the way Levi just acted toward you, nobody is going to be stupid enough to cross your path,” she looked up at the circle of girls that had formed around Mandy, “All those girls will be kissing your ass by the end of the night, mark my words. They’re all fickle ass bitches,” she turned to face the group, “Okay ladies, enough chit-chat, it’s time to play a little game we call Rotten Egg.”

28

I’d read
Lord of the Flies
, seen the movie, both the original and the remake. I knew all about Zimbardo and his famed prison experiment. I’d even studied the Nazis just last year in Mr. Housten’s history class. So with all that stored away in my sixteen year old brain, I believed I knew something about the dangers of pack mentality, and would therefore be better equipped to stand up to the pressures of it, to do the just and moral thing. But that night when Camille instructed me and the
Delancey Girls
in the circle to spread baby oil all over the bodies of the newly
tapped girls
, I found myself immediately obeying, without so much as a second thought. And that was just the beginning, it would get much worse and yet I would keep my mouth securely shut.

“Here’s how we play Rotten Egg,” Camille announced after the girls had been thoroughly glazed in oil, “There is a house about two football fields away,” she pointed in the direction of the other eye on the mountain, “It’s big. You can’t miss it. Your mission is to get there before anyone else. You don’t want to be the last one there or you’ll be the Rotten Egg,” she paused for emphasis, “and trust me, nobody wants to be the Rotten Egg,” They all looked at her with anticipation, “On your marks, get set, run!” she yelled.

And they were off and running, twelve adolescent bodies scampering into the moonlight, a pack of giggles twisting in the trees.

“
Alright,” Camille said turning to the others, “Everyone back to my house. Get rid of the tiny tots and make yourselves comfortable,” and then she turned to me, “You’d better come with me.”

“
What the fuck!” Mandy said indignantly to Camille, and then, as if I wasn’t standing two feet from her, “Why is she going?” Everyone stood still, watching the drama unfold.

“
That’s what Levi told me to do, Mandy,” Camille said, a condescending smile spread across her face.

“
She doesn’t even go to St. Jacobs! I mean look at her,” she said gesturing at me, “Like she could even afford it.”

Feeling a sudden burst of anger erupt inside of me, I took a step toward her, “You know what Mandy,” I practically spit her name, “You are more than welcome to do whatever it is that you are so goddamned eager to do, be my fucking guest,” the cursing came out smoothly, which was a shocker as I rarely swear, and when I do I usually sound like a two year old using a new word for the first time, “I’ll just go ahead and call Levi to let him know to expect you.” I had no idea that my words would have such an immediate impact, but as soon as I pulled my phone from my pocket an audible gasp seemed to rise from the group.