Memory of an Immortal Heart (Immortal Hearts) (18 page)

“Did
you?”

Brand
stared at Eva, caught in his regret. “Did I what?”

Eva
frowned. “Did you help Khael?”

“At
first.” Brand watched the concern fill Eva’s eyes. He inhaled, feeling the
warmth of her palm as he held it to his lips. Her clean scent filled the air,
and he wanted nothing more than to bury his face in the delicate arch of her
neck to taste her smoothness beneath his tongue. To savor her until she
screamed his name and they both forgot.

More
often than not, Brand was jealous of forgetting.

“You
never told me,” Eva said, stroking her hand slowly down his chest, accepting
his silence, “where you fall in your Gens.”

Brand
watched her, admitting, “Ayin.”
Second
.

Most
days, Seth could outfight Brand, but Seth refused the job. So by skill,
temperament and ability Brand was Stronghold’s Ayin. He was, Brand admitted
grimly, probably the only one who could work with Seth to keep both Gaviros and
Khael from killing each other while ensuring Stronghold’s overall safety.

Eva’s
hand had stilled over his heart. Her clean clear scent darkened, tinged with
old pain. “My uncle was our Ayin. He was – I miss him. After he died, my
mother wasn’t the same.”

Brand
reached down, pulled Eva into his lap. “Your uncle makes you sad.”

Eva
didn’t speak for a long moment. She leaned against him, setting off small fires
under Brand’s skin. Then she sighed.

“He
died in a car wreck. We were all there: Rainey, my mom, uncle Tad and me. We
were celebrating – Tad had gotten the Resh to give mom leave to go to
college. She was going to be a doctor. Mom would have been good at it,” Eva
murmured, touching his cheek. “She would have loved your ability.” Brand
tightened his arm around Eva, cupping his fingers over her soft dark hair; Eva
glanced up, her expression struck him. She was frightened.

“Go
on,” Brand forced his voice to be gentle.

“It
happened so fast, but – Tad had good reflexes. So when the semi hit us,
he steered the car so that we…so
we
would be okay. But he died. Not even
a Kaspian can heal from…that. Rainey’s arm was…” Eva swallowed. “She healed but
I know it hurts her.” The silver in Eva’s eyes shimmered. “She’s my sister,
Brand. She’s all I have left. I miss her.”

Guilt
struck Brand as he remembered how he had prevented her from going home. “Your
mother died?” he asked gently.

“Not
then,” Eva’s voice turned flat. She looked away and out the window. “No, mom
died later. My ability never even gave me a Warning…” Her lips turned downward,
she stopped.

When
Eva looked up again, her smile was forced. Her lips wavered, her eyes were
dark, and she appeared on the verge of tears. “So. That was what happened to
Tad. Any painful childhood stories
you
want to share?”

“No.”
He had too many. And very few of those memories were actually his own. “You
have enough nightmares,” Brand said, leaning to take her lips. Eva resisted,
frowning at him.

“Brand,
I shared myself. Now you need to...” Her voice dwindled as Brand lowered his
head, their noses touching.

“You
don’t.”

Her
body stiffened. She started to move away off his lap, and with a soft curse he
caught her and held her against him. She squirmed, trying to push away, but he
ignored that.

“Okay.
Let’s try this again.
Why?
” Brand tried to tamp down on the battle
inside him. There were things Eva didn’t need to know. Didn’t
want
to
know. Eva tensed at his tone.

“It’s
only fair. I told you all about myself, but I barely know
you
. And yet,
here you are, insisting I go to Stronghold with you, thinking you can kiss me
whenever you like…” She inhaled sharply and he heard her mutter under her
breath, “…and I don’t know
what’s
wrong with my libido,” as the scent of
her anger burned clear, warm and seductive.

Brand
growled softly. He tilted his forehead to Eva’s and searched her eyes. The
silver in her gaze had the faintest sliver of rich gold, the faintest ring of a
not-quite-hidden angry arousal.

“Have
you ever been with a Kaspian?” he asked abruptly. “Or have you only had sex
with human males?”

She
froze in shock, staring at him. “What?! No, only humans – I mean…what
business
is it of yours…”

With
only human lovers, Eva never would have let them see her eyes as they took her.

When he
took her, he would see that silver gaze. He would watch it darken to gold, then
explode with color.

Eva
would keep her eyes open for him. Only for him.

“
Brand
.”

Annoyance
flickered, but he decided to humor her.

“What
do you
want
to know?” A bare growl.

“Anything!
Pick a memory,
any
memory. Just…
give
me something! Or
let
– me – go.
”

“When I
was five, Sakai attacked our castle.”

“
What
– ”

“My
mother killed them all,” Brand snapped, less than pleased to unearth the
memory. Even for her. Centuries of habit, centuries of silence, did not break
so easily. Brand growled low, then claimed her lips as they fell open. Eva’s
shock spiked the air like summer rain.

She
started to speak, but Brand deepened the kiss. He didn’t want to talk. He
didn’t want to go into the past. It haunted him too much as it was.

“
Brand
.”

“No
more talking.” Eva’s lips were soft, still against his; then, as he nipped her,
Eva gasped him and he slipped his tongue into the warmth of her mouth. His hand
traced down, cupping the softness of her breast; it filled his palm, just
barely. As he ran his thumb across that small peak, Eva arched.

Brand
wanted to drown in her.

But the
taste of the memory followed Brand down, an unwelcome flavor on the back of his
throat.

Because
Brand hadn’t been afraid of the Sakai that day, he hadn’t been afraid of dying.
He hadn’t been afraid at all. No, what Brand remembered most was his mother,
drenched in blood.

He
remembered the ancient smile on Ashtoreth’s face as she licked the blood from
her fingers, savoring it.

That
was the day Brand first began to understand what he was.

A
castle?

Wait.
His mother
killed them all?

Brand
nipped her bottom lip and Eva gasped, opening as he tilted her head back,
bracketing her neck with his palm. Brand’s fingers forged through her messy
hair. His kiss was rough, almost fierce, which was when Eva realized that
Brand
was trying to forget. That Brand hadn’t wanted to tell her about himself,
almost hadn’t been able to give her that portion of his past.

Eva
regretted pushing him.

Sort
of.

Because
now she
knew
something about Brand. Something
real
. It was small,
confusing, but it was a part of his life.

Good
enough for now.
Because she hadn’t been kissed like this –
ever.

Eva
relaxed into the kiss, her skin tightening as the heat within her belly
expanded. She nibbled his lips, stroking her tongue against his, and Brand’s
growl reverberated beneath her palms. When Eva looked into his eyes, she saw
hunger. Pure lust. A growing, soul-deep
need
.

No man
had looked at her like that before. With such naked want.

It
poured through Eva’s bones like lava, calling to her own desire, and kindling a
response. Heat pooled in Eva’s thighs, tightening her breasts, as the skin over
her body became too tight, too small.

Brand
was using her to forget. But Eva had to forget too.

They
needed each other. For this.
Once can’t hurt
.

Eva
grasped those broad shoulders to pull herself upwards, toward Brand as his hand
came to grip the curve of her spine. His muscles were hard beneath the sweater,
his body was tense as he pressed forward.
Still pushing
.

“Brand,
look at me.”

His
blue eyes flicked up, full of shadows and dark desire. Gold flecked his gaze,
but it was haunted. So haunted. Brand leaned away to follow along the neckline
of Eva’s sweater, sending her further into the seat, so that her knees nudged
apart, and Eva caught the faint scent of her growing arousal. She twined her
fingers into his silky hair, pulled his head back. “Brand. Wait.”

“What?”
Then Brand closed his eyes briefly, shook his head. “Too fast?”

“No.
Wanted you to know. We can forget together,” Eva whispered, touching his lips,
that stubborn jaw, as he stilled.

Surprise
sparked deep in Brand’s gaze, turned the blue to gold. He froze for a long
moment – then leaned forward, nuzzling her throat. “
Thank you
,” he
whispered against her ear. They both needed this.

Time to
forget
.

Time to
forget about Rohe, her Gens, her mother. Time to forget about whatever it was
that darkened Brand’s eyes over his past.

As
Brand’s lips found her breasts through the sweater, Eva parted her thighs to
straddle him, the scent of her arousal permeating the air of the cabin. She
watched Brand’s face change, his nostrils flare as he drew it in. His jaw
tightened, his muscles clenched, becoming so hard beneath her they felt like
steel.

Eva
gasped as her fingers found his rigid erection, stroking the solid length
through his pants. Brand was huge, thick…
god
how he would fill her. Eva
wanted his pants off, she
needed
…hunger sparked painfully inside her
lower belly. “
Brand
,” she gasped, fingers tightening, her eyes flashing
to his. She was wet enough.

Brand
growled, opened his eyes.

Deep
ruby striations traced the edge of his irises. His jaw was tense, his gaze
wild. His thighs, his body, were hot beneath her. And Eva realized that Brand
had gripped her hips, fastening her to him. The length of his erection pulsed
against her cleft, so close, blatantly proclaiming his hunger. Eva slid
forward, fitting herself against him, and tilted her hips. Brand hissed.

“What
do you need?” It was a bare growl.

“
You
.”

“No.
For this to work. To be right. What do you need?”

Eva
looked up and smiled...ran her palm under the edge of Brand’s sweater…and
rocked against his erection. He was hard beneath her swollen cleft, hot. And
she was ready. So very ready.
Not much
.

The
breath hissed from Brand’s teeth. The pained expression on his face made her
even wetter.

She
shivered. “That’s not all – of you – is it?” Eva whispered, meaning
to tease…but her words came out breathy with anticipation. God, he felt like
more than enough. She nibbled his throat, licked him.

“
Eva
.”
Brand’s fingers dug into the softness of her hips.

“Shhh.
Stop. Stop thinking. We’re forgetting. Remember?” Eva reached up to cradle
Brand’s face as she rocked again, and he let her. She pulled back in time to
see a feral expression enter Brand’s gaze.

“
Answer
.
Tell me what you need.
Now
. Because I,” Brand’s voice was harsh,
guttural, and for the first time, had the faintest twist of an accent in it,
“…am going to fuck you, Eva. You keep rocking on me like that. But you need
kind. If you want me to be kind, you tell me what you need.
Now
.”

 Eva
just smiled and ground against him. Brand closed his eyes, his jaw turning
white. Biteable. She leaned forward, nibbled.

“
Evita
.”

“But
that’s the point…isn’t it?” she breathed into his ear, inhaling the beautiful
sunlit scent of him, beginning to get the faintest hinting scent of his own
arousal, and gave a quick lick on his neck. “To fuck?” She pressed against the
ridge of his erection,
hard
. “Maybe I don’t care about kindness. Maybe
fucking
is what I need.”

Brand
was on her.

“Goddamned
sweater Joshua bought you,” a snarl as he ripped the material away, as if he
were offended by it, the lines of his claws trailing seductive points over her
skin, then disappearing as he gripped her ribcage, running his callused palms
up over her waist. The rough sensation of his hands rippled through her skin
and Eva arched against him. The hunger inside her was mounting, the press of
him against her maddening.

“It
was…too hot anyway.” She needed him closer… “I thought it was…
ah.
” Eva
gasped, her head falling back as Brand palmed her breasts, ran his thumbs up
and over the confines of her bra, suckling the pulse of her neck.

“Joshua
knows better. Buying clothes for my…” Brand focused on the red bra that set off
the creaminess of Eva’s skin, and swore. When he looked up, the flecks in his
gaze weren’t entirely due to lust, but to rage. “You let him buy that.
Fucking…”