Loving a Bad Boy (9 page)

His throat tightened at the pain in her
voice. “How old were you?”

“
Six. I had six years with
her. She’d gotten pregnant twice after me and lost both. The
doctor’s told daddy it was dangerous for her to keep trying. So he
stopped.”

Julio stilled at the implication. He had a
strong sex-drive and couldn’t imagine living without it. “He
cheated on her.” It was a statement.

She nodded. “I didn’t find out until I got
pregnant with you. But according to daddy, she found out and was
devastated. She wanted to leave him. They argued about it and he
promised to stop.”

“
Did he?”

She shrugged. “He said he did. For a while
at least. But she never fully forgave him. She kept trying to
leave. Once she made it past the gate before he discovered we were
missing. She told me we were going for a walk. I remember being
pushed to the ground as bullets flew by my head.”

She turned toward him, her eyes like lasers.
“That’s when I discovered what being daddy’s daughter meant.
Families weren’t safe. Mama screamed and kicked as security threw
us into a car and took us back to the house. Daddy ran down the
stairs, picked me up and carried me into the house. I remember mama
crying in the background, but I was so glad to be safe with my
daddy again that I just snuggled closer to him. They argued all the
time. Once daddy slapped her and she spit on him.” She sighed. “It
was a hard time. I never went for walks with her again. Daddy hired
me a nanny and we spent most of our time together. Mama would come
and sit with me sometimes but she never took me anywhere
again.”

The sadness in her voice made his heart ache
for her. He threw his arm around her shoulder and pulled her
close.

“
Umm, you smell good,” she
said as she inhaled.

“
It’s that cologne you
bought me for my birthday.” He grinned looking at her upturned face
as she sniffed him over like a hound.

“
I know. I love that
scent. Funny, I can’t remember the name of it right
now.”

He chuckled. “Me neither.”

She leaned her head against his chest. “I
loved my mama, but she was so sad all the time. When she came into
the room, she was like a Debbie Downer, all gloomy like, you know
what I mean?”

Thinking of some of the guys he met in
prison, he nodded. “Yeah, I met a few people like that.”

“
That’s why I felt so
guilty for not being upset when she finally did leave.”

“
So, she managed to run
away?”

“
I think daddy let her go.
Anyway, she went to her family, the Delgado’s. They sent her back
in a bag. Daddy went ballistic. Within twenty-four hours, all her
family in South America and the U.S. was dead.”

That was some serious shit, Julio thought.
“You said he let her go. He didn’t know what they’d do in
retaliation for him taking out those guys?”

“
I don’t know. He never
said. What he did say was she was his wife and no one was supposed
to lay a finger on her. He claimed they’d been the ones shooting at
us at the gate months before and they would pay for all of it. I
was sent to Aunt Frances.”

“
That’s Roberto’s mom,
right?”

She nodded. “Yeah. Daddy’s younger sister.
She was married to Uncle Ricardo.”

“
They worked munitions
back then I think,” Julio said wondering what the man would think
of the colossal fuck up his son had made.

“
I guess so. But anyway
that’s when Roberto and I became so close. He’d called me a spoiled
brat but he’d do anything I asked.” She smiled.

“
You probably drove them
all crazy.”

She swatted his arm. “I was six and my mama
was gone, they were supposed to be extra nice to me.” She smirked.
“Anyway, Roberto was eight years older than me and I was the
closest thing he would get to a sister, so we spent a lot of time
talking and hanging out. I don’t have to tell you how great that
felt having someone that much older pay attention to everything you
say. I loved him for it, we remained close.”

“
Yeah, Roberto’s a real
peach.”

“
He has changed some. More
stuffy—”

“
Full of
himself—”

“
But deep inside, he’s a
good man. Loyal and loving,”

“
I’d never argue with you
Mrs. Black. But I reserve judgment on the matter.”

“
Good, thanks. I knew
you’d be fair.” She paused. “Next thing I know, Daddy is dating my
nanny.”

“
Your nanny?” He smiled
thinking of the wily old fox.

“
Yeah, Ms. Lucia. She was
wonderful. She helped soften the blow when daddy found out I was
pregnant. Daddy wanted to kill Felipe with his bare hands.
Sometimes I wonder…”

“
Felipe?... You wonder
what?”

A dreamy smile crossed her face. “Felipe
Santiago. He had come home with Roberto for some dinner Auntie was
having. I hadn’t been allowed to go the prom. Daddy and I weren’t
speaking so I was with my aunt, sulking when Roberto and Felipe
walked in. He was over six feet tall, a little shorter than you
though. He had muscles and a great body.”

“
He looked good. Got it.”
Julio tried to picture his sperm donor and couldn’t.

She laughed. “He was six years older than me
and very quiet. We sat next to each other at dinner and talked. I
was giddy.”

He chuckled at her use of the word. “Giddy?
You?”

She rolled her eyes at him. “Brat.”

He laughed.

“
You just don’t get it. I
had never been this close to a boy before. I went to an all-girl
school with a bodyguard. It was hard to have friends. No one came
over to visit, I missed all the parties and shopping was a major
event because of security. It was horrible.”

He sobered as he visualized her life. His
mom had such a vibrant personality that it was hard to imagine her
in those surroundings. It would have been hellish for her. “I’m
sorry. That must’ve been hard.”

She nodded. “It was. I was
miserable. So sitting, talking with Felipe
was
a big deal. Roberto was nervous,
tried to keep us apart. But I was seventeen and a bit head-strong.
Plus Roberto had been letting me have my way for years, there was
no way he would stand in the way of what I thought was true
love.”

“
True love? Was it just
you or both of you?” The thought that anyone would deny his mom
their heart pissed him off. But he knew most men would simply go
for a piece of ass.

She shrugged. “Turns out it was just me. Of
course at the time he said all the right things, made it a
memorable weekend. But in the end he returned to his fiancé and his
accounting job.”

The sliver of anger blossomed in his chest.
“Accounting job? Tell me this asshole was a mole. Tell me he
seduced you deliberately to get info on your dad. Tell me he is
dead.”

She tsked him. “Did I mention how much alike
you are to daddy?” She waved aside his answer. “Felipe was a whore,
he wasn’t involved with any organization, and didn’t know about
daddy…at first. The real problem was his fiancé. She found out he
had cheated and wanted to confront me. I guess she planned to give
me a warning or something.” She shrugged. “It didn’t work. Roberto
warned Felipe to get her to back off. Like a fool he didn’t, and
decided to stay out of it. That’s about the time I found out I was
pregnant. Daddy was furious. Not long after, Felipe and his fiancé
disappeared.

“
Women are more devious
than men,” he said thinking of Felipe’s fiancé.

“
And your point
is?”

“
Nothing. Okay, where’d
you meet Pops?” Gerald Black had been in his life for as long as he
could remember. As far as he was concerned Gerald was his father.
It was obvious the blond haired giant wasn’t his natural father,
they were just too different, but he knew Gerald had his back no
matter what. Despite all their problems, and disappointments, their
bond went bone deep.

Smoke had been under Gerald’s command in the
military. Gerald had asked Smoke to keep an eye on Julio who was
incarcerated as a juvie for stealing a car. That hadn’t been the
first time Julio had a brush with the law, but it was the first
time his stepdad and mom allowed him to stay in jail. It probably
saved his life. He met Smoke while playing cards in the cafeteria.
He beat Smoke in two games of gin, and that was the beginning of
their friendship.

His heart leapt seeing her face light up. He
released a breath, she really loved Gerald. For a moment when she
spoke of Felipe, he’d been concerned.

“
Daddy was angry with his
sister; claimed Auntie didn’t watch me properly. He threatened to
kill Roberto for bringing Felipe home while I was there. For a few
months he was on a rampage. That made me angry. I was pregnant and
he was acting as though his world had ended. I stopped eating,
wouldn’t get out of bed or anything. The only reason I didn’t run
away was because of what happened to mama. Finally Ms. Lucia
convinced him to allow her to take me to meet her parents back in
the states. Since they were going to get married, she wanted her
family to know their future granddaughter.” His mom laughed. “She
was a phenomenal woman. I wished you’d have met her.”

He stroked her arm and didn’t comment.

“
Anyway, he gave in and we
flew to Kansas. We had security and everything, but it was
different. The guys respected Lucia and gave us space to talk and
shop. We went to a fair in her home town. I ate cotton candy and
had a wonderful time. Her parents treated me like their long lost
granddaughter and spoiled me rotten.” She stretched while releasing
a long breath.

“
It was glorious. But the
thing that grabbed me was the kids. I started taking pictures of
kids running in the parks, laughing and having fun. They were
talking gibberish that was so cute, tears came to my eyes. I knew I
had to make some changes. I think I grew up on that
trip.”

She looked at him. “I decided to fight the
Cartel. I wanted to raise my kid in a place like Smellington,
Kansas. To this day, I don’t know where I got the balls but when I
returned home I knew I was leaving.”

Julio’s interest was piqued. He’d always
wondered how she’d had a choice where they lived.

“
Daddy said no of course.
We argued. I became depressed and threatened to end my
life.”

He shot forward and looked down at her.
“What?”

She shrugged, “I was desperate and
determined not to live or die like mama. We argued constantly until
the doctor became concerned and talked with him. I was underweight;
not eating right and it was affecting my son. Once daddy realized
that he could lose me and his grandson, he offered a compromise. I
could return stateside and stay with his new in-laws, but I had to
change my name and allow for discreet security.”

“
Gerald’s not from
Kansas.” He wasn’t rushing her, but he wanted his questions
answered.

“
No he’s not. He’s from
Atlanta. He was visiting one of his friends when we met at the
library. You were ten months old. By that time I was almost
nineteen and lonely for male attention. Plus he was cute.” She
smiled.

“
Um hmm.”

“
Anyway we started
talking. He fell for you right away and that made me fall in love
with him. We talked back and forth when he left for his
assignment.” She frowned in concentration. “It’s been so long, I
don’t remember where he was based at the time, but we decided to
get married. Daddy insisted on coming over and explaining a few
things to him.”

“
Wow.” His respect for
Gerald rose. “Were you scared your dad would send Pops
running?”

“
Yes and no. I don’t think
I could fall in love with someone who couldn’t stand up to daddy. I
was more afraid of how he would feel about the Cartel connection.
We had to live incognito. No one could know I was Benito Cardenas’
daughter or that there was another Cardenas.” She pointed at him.
“You. Daddy was scared someone would try to take you out if they
knew he had an heir. Gerald and Francisco promised to make sure
that didn’t happen.”

“
Whoa, they got along
then?”

She shook her head. “Not really. You know
how Francisco is, he lives and breathes this stuff, always has.
Gerald wanted you to have a broader view of the world. They clashed
big time.”

“
Hmmm, I wondered if
they’d ever been cool,” he said looking at her. “Go on.”

“
We lived all over the
world and no one found out. Periodically, Francisco would call, pay
me a visit, just to make sure everything was good.” Silence
permeated the room as they reflected on all that was said and not
said. It figures Francisco had been a shadowy part of his life, the
man had a blueprint for his training the moment he came on board
years ago.

He bent forward and kissed her forehead. “I
know that was an abbreviated version of what had to be really hard
for you. Thanks for sharing it with me. My respect for you and
Gerald is through the roof. Love you, Ma.”

She patted his face with closed eyes. “For
you, I’d do anything to keep you safe. You are my world and I am
proud of you. You wanna know why I gave up and stopped bugging you
about joining Francisco?”

Curious, he nodded. She’d never said and
he’d always thought it was because she agreed with him about saving
Smoke. Maybe that wasn’t the case.