Love Beyond Time (Morna's Legacy Series) (23 page)

As I continued to shuffle books around the room, I realized that the real reason I seemed so preoccupied with re-organizing the space is that I was doing my very best to put off the inevitable. I had to write to Mom and let her know I wasn’t coming home.

I was completely confident in my decision. Regardless of the unusual circumstances that had brought me into this time, it had landed me exactly where I was supposed to be. That being said, it didn’t make it any easier for me to go about saying goodbye to my mother for what was most assuredly forever.

The thought brought forth a familiar lump inside my throat. The same lump that had lodged itself into place when I’d attended my father’s funeral, the same lump that I’d been forced to choke down after laying eyes on Donal MacChristy.

I knew my mother wasn’t dying. She would undoubtedly go on to live a happy life, endlessly dating men either too young or too old for her, and traveling the world on whatever dig caught her fancy. But she’d not only been my mother but my very best friend for my entire life. And while I knew she would understand, I also knew it would hurt her to know that I’d chosen not to return to be her partner in crime.

Once I’d rearranged every book in the room at least twice, I knew it was time to sit down and just get it over with.

I tore a blank piece of parchment from one of Morna’s old journals and practiced what I would say to her.

Twenty-five drafts later, I knew that the truth was that it didn’t matter what I wrote. It was going to hurt her regardless. It was best that I keep it simple and only touch on the most important things: that I was safe, that I was happy, and that I hoped she would understand.

In the end, I wrote only four sentences, ensuring that I left room in case she wanted to write a reply.

“I don’t want you ever to doubt how much I love you, Mom, but I found it. That love you talked to me about at the inn? He’s here, and I have to stay with him. I’m safe and happy, and I know that’s all you’ve ever wanted for me.”

It was done. And while I knew I’d made the right decision, it had cost me the best mom in the world.

I was unsure of how long I sat there, staring blankly at the wall, feeling oddly cold and hollow. I’d been shattered when my father had been killed in a boating accident. Losing someone so suddenly wraps you in a sort of black shock that takes years to shake off.

Somehow, this seemed harder. It was just as sudden a break, and the knowledge that she was alive and well and would go on living and sharing her fun, witty, and wild self for the world to see, but not for me to get to witness, left me feeling utterly lost.

The hand that touched my shoulder was my anchor, and I gladly turned into his embrace. He too understood the grief of loss, with his father’s death occurring shortly before my arrival. He didn’t ask what I’d been doing. He looked around at the tidy room and at the words on the page and silently sat down beside me, wrapping me in his arms.

He held me without saying a word, silently stroking my back, bending occasionally to plant a gentle kiss on the top of my head, letting me know that he was there for as long as I needed him.

Eventually I pulled away and managed a smile to reassure him that I wasn’t re-thinking my decision. He smiled back and reached for my hand.

“I know it may no be customary. My parents kept separate bedchambers throughout their marriage, but how would ye feel about moving into my bedchamber? I doona like the thought of ye being so far away. I want to fall asleep each night with ye next to me, wrapped in my arms.”

I stood and pulled him toward the doorway. “I would love to. I’d already asked Mary this morning if she would have someone move my belongings across the hall. In my time, it would be uncustomary for us not to share a room. Besides, I don’t want to be alone tonight.”

Chapter 35

Kinnaird Castle

“What does the lad want with me?” Ramsay marched from his bedchamber, furious that someone would dare have the nerve to arrive unannounced.

“I doona know, sir. All he said was that he must see ye straight away. He had an item to give ye.”

“The damned fool had better be bringing me Eoin Conall’s head on a spike if he’s to wake me at this hour.” Ramsay burst through the doors of the study where the father of his two stable lads stood uncomfortably at the end of the room. “Well, what do ye possibly have that ye think is warranted to disturb me?”

“I . . . I met with the man ye sent to Conall Castle. He gave me this ring to give to ye. Said it’s the signet of the late Alasdair Conall, and he believed it could be of some use to ye since Eoin has asked that the MacChristy clan gather at the castle as well.”

“Give it to me.” Ramsay thrust his hand eagerly in the man’s direction. He knew he’d done right by sending the man. The lad was a quick thinker, and he’d just proven that he was worth more than Ramsay had previously expected. He studied the ring, recognizing Alasdair’s signet immediately. “Thank ye, lad. Now, get out.”

The man’s face dropped, obviously disappointed at a lack of reward, but he retreated quickly, leaving Ramsay alone with one of his messengers in the study.

“Dress in the colors of the Conalls and take this ring to MacChristy Castle at once. Doona give this ring to anyone but Donal, do ye understand? Ye will have no trouble gaining an audience. Donal will welcome any Conall. Once ye have given him the ring, tell him that Eoin no longer requires his men or his presence for the battle. The situation has been taken care of, and there is no going to be an attack.”

“Aye. O’ course, sir.”

With one less clan to worry about, Ramsay was certain his plan to annihilate the Conalls would succeed. In three days’ time, he would gather his men and everyone at the castle. Together they would march to the aide of the Conalls, gladly assisting them in their bloody deaths.

* * *

Conall Castle

“I assure ye, lad, I’m in no hurry. I’ll gladly spend as many nights down here with ye as ye wish. But we willna be leaving until ye tell me what it was that ye gave to the stranger in town and where ye got it from.” Arran threw a fist into the stomach of the man who was now strung up by both wrists in the center of the dungeon.

The runaway groaned painfully as one of his ribs snapped at the impact of Arran’s fist. “I already told ye. The man was my uncle, and I was only returning an item I borrowed from him.”

“Ye lie. The man was no old enough to be yer uncle, and ye had no such item when ye arrived here.”

“I did so. I keep it in my bag. Ye dinna search me when I arrived. I’ve had it with me all along.”

Arran thrust another fist forward, this time hitting the man’s other side. “What was the item ye borrowed from him?”

“Only . . .” the man paused as a cough racked his chest, sending blood spewing out onto the dungeon floor. “It was only a coin.”

Arran shook his head at the runaway’s pathetic attempt to lie, this time sending his fist for the man’s jaw. He wrung out his hand as the runaway spit up a few of his teeth. “Like I said. Doona expect to see daylight until ye tell me truth.”

Chapter 36

The days following my decision to remain here passed by in a blur of hurried activity, with everyone in the castle and village rushing to make preparations for the arrival of the MacChristys and Kinnairds as well as preparing for the upcoming battle.

It was the night before the expected attack, and while both Eoin and Arran seemed confident all would be well, I found my anxiety building. They’d not seen the devastating ruins of our home, as I had. And while I knew that having two clans join us for the fight increased our chances, knowing what happened before made me uneasy and it made me wonder why there were still ruins on Mom’s side of time, if we were going to succeed in battle.

Mom had responded to my message the following morning, playing it upbeat as always, but I could see the tear stains on the parchment where she’d cried. She was happy that I was happy, but she was as heartbroken as I was at our separation from one another. We’d written back and forth over the days leading up to the battle as I did my best to assure her that the fate of the Conalls would no longer stay the same now that we had reinforcements headed our way.

I wondered how it would affect everything on the other side of history if we succeeded. I hoped that I would still be able to use the book to communicate with my mother if the castle never ended up being destroyed. If we were defeated, it didn’t really matter.

Dusk had long since crept over the castle, and with each passing hour the tension throughout the castle heightened. Both the MacChristys and the Kinnairds should have arrived at the castle by now, and, although Eoin was trying his hardest to remain calm, I could tell that my hovering, nervous energy was doing nothing to help the situation.

I walked over to him and placed a hand on his shoulder as he sat in one of the studies on the main floor staring out the window for any sign of the clans’ arrival. “Would you like me to leave you alone for a while?”

He reached up, latched onto my hand, and pulled me down onto his lap. “Aye, lass. It’s no that I doona want ye here. But there’s no need for ye to stay up so late worrying with me. I’m sure they were only delayed and will arrive sometime during the night. Go on up to bed, lass, and I’ll join ye once both clans have been settled around the castle. It will calm me to know that ye are soundly asleep.”

I knew I wouldn’t sleep until he came up to the bedchamber, but he was doing his best to politely tell me to beat it, and I didn’t blame him. Leaning in to give him a quick kiss, I turned and made my way upstairs.

* * *

It was well into the deepest part of the night when Arran alerted him that Ramsay’s men were almost to the castle. Eoin stood from the seat in his study and went to the castle’s entrance to greet them.

He’d expected Ramsay to burst through the doors with some elaborate tale which would explain their late arrival and have them all laughing and breaking into the ale within minutes. Instead, as Ramsay Kinnaird pushed his way into the castle’s main foyer, Eoin knew instantly something had gone terribly wrong.

Ramsay and his men, their clothes wet from the rain and splashed with mud, looked as if they’d been riding hard through the night. Their faces were panicked and frightened.

Eoin didn’t bother with greetings as he rushed to grab Laird Kinnaird, who appeared as if he was about to fall over from exhaustion.

“What is it, man? What’s happened?”

“Ach, Eoin! I’m afraid we’ve all underestimated Laird MacLyrron’s forces. We only just escaped in time. And I was forced to bring not only me men, but my daughter and all the women and children.”

Eoin blanched and suddenly felt unsteady on his feet as he took in the news. “So they doona only plan to attack us. They tried to attack yer territory as well?”

Ramsay spoke in between over-exaggerated gasping breaths. “Aye. I believe he split up his men and sent half to my keep and half to the MacChristy’s. For when we passed through Donal’s territory . . .” Ramsay paused as if unable to finish.

A terrifying sense of dread crept over Eoin’s heart.

“What is it, man? What did ye find at Donal’s?” Eoin ushered Ramsay over to the staircase in the center of the room, and they both collapsed onto the stone steps next to one another.

“The MacChristys will no be coming to our aide. They’re all gone, Eoin. The clan MacChristy has been completely wiped out. Women, children, livestock, all. Laird MacLyrron left nothing alive. And now he’s headed in our direction.”

Bile rose in Eoin’s throat. If what Ramsay said was true, their hopes of surviving the attack were greatly diminished. “Do ye think with our combined men we can stand against them?”

Eoin took in Ramsay’s pained expression and knew his response before he spoke.

“Nay. I doona believe we can. He has three times the number of men we do. The best we can hope for is to hide our women and children as long as we can, and nay let them take us without a fight.”

“How far away are they? Do we have time to prepare at all?”

“Aye. A group of my men were scouting their location. Tis how we were warned they were headed our way. They are reconvening to gather after splitting directions. They’ve camped for the night in between my castle and what was the MacChristy’s keep. They canna make it here before tomorrow night.”

“A small mercy, but at least yer men shall be able to get a short time of rest before we prepare for battle and hide the women tomorrow. We shall all need our strength. While I know sleep is likely to escape us all tonight, I think we should all try. Tell yer men they are welcome to set camp anywhere on castle grounds. I will show ye to yer chamber. Yer daughter may stay in my mother’s old room. Blaire resides with me.”

“Thank ye, Eoin. It calms an old man’s heart to know he will die beside such a fine laird and ally. Let us reconvene in the morning.”

* * *

Eoin opened the door to his bedchamber as quietly as he could, although he knew Bri would still be awake waiting for him. He kept his back to her as he blew out the candles next to the bed. Then he undressed and crawled in beside her.

If he let her see his face, she would know something was wrong, and he couldn’t bear for her to know just yet. He wanted one last night, as sleepless as it would be for him, to hold her in his arms and thank the heavens for sending the lass throughout time to find him.

He finally knew the love that his own father had shared with his mother. When his mother had died, it had taken every fiber of strength his father possessed to keep on living. His love for her never ceased, and Eoin had known it had been her name on his father’s mind and heart as he’d watched his father take his last breath.

He’d never understood how a lass could have such a hold on someone’s heart. Eoin grew up wondering why his father never remarried; he would’ve if it had been he who’d lost his wife. It was unnatural for a man to live alone so long, and how many years did it take for a heart to heal anyways? Surely not a lifetime.