Read Liberty Belle Online

Authors: Patricia Pacjac Carroll

Tags: #Christian Books & Bibles, #Literature & Fiction, #Historical, #Westerns, #Religious & Inspirational Fiction, #Religion & Spirituality, #Christian Fiction

Liberty Belle (29 page)

BOOK: Liberty Belle
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The little girl’s curly hair and dimples would melt the coldest heart. Her boss would have his hands full with that one. The boy remained guarded.

“Well, how is breakfast?” Mr. Rowen’s deep voice rumbled through the little nook.

Libby quickly finished chewing the last of the biscuit. Why did she feel like a child caught eating a forbidden cookie? Swallowing hard and hoping he didn’t notice, she nodded. “Very good, thank you. The children and I were getting acquainted. They are delightful.”

He placed his arms over them and kissed their heads.

Aw, he is such a good father.
He’d never leave his son with strangers. Of course, Mark wasn’t really Wade’s son, but he’d been ready to leave him. The smile went out of her heart.
Wade
. How could she miss him so much?

“Is everything all right?” Mr. Rowen, Jane, and Robert were staring at her.

Her mind snapped to the present. “Oh my, yes. Fine.” Libby sighed. Now she was starting to sound like Flora.

Her boss pointed to the kitchen table. “This is the classroom. School will begin promptly after breakfast and continue until lunch. I expect Jane to be reading in three weeks and for Robert to learn his addition and subtraction. I also expect you to clean the children’s rooms, dust the furniture, and tidy up the house.” He rearranged the dishes so that they were perfectly aligned. “I like things done a certain way.”

Libby straightened, placed her hands in front of her on the table, and stared her employer in the eye. She was not a child. “Mr. Rowen, I will teach them how I believe is best, but I am not a housemaid.”

A flicker of anger narrowed his brows. “We will discuss this later. Do you have any other questions?”

Emboldened, she stood to face him. “I need to talk privately about the rudeness of your servant Andrew.”

“No need. I fired him this morning.” He glared at her, his eyes cold. “I need to attend to some business. Please keep the children quiet.” Without waiting for her reply, he left the room.

Feeling flushed, Libby turned to the boy and girl. Jane was snuggled against her brother. Their eyes wide and mouths open, if she were to guess, they were either afraid of Terrence or her manner. Clearly, they were not used to anyone standing up to their father.

“Well, let’s go outside for a walk. I find that the mind is cleared by fresh air.” She held her hand to Jane.

The little girl squirmed out of her brother’s grasp, took Libby’s hand, and squeezed Libby’s hand with pudgy, baby fingers. They started toward the door. The boy had yet to move.

“Robert, come with us. Please?” She smiled at him. So young to have such a great loss. He must miss his mother. Her thoughts stung.

She missed her own mother. What she wouldn’t give to see her. She and Flora sent letters several weeks ago. Perhaps one from home would arrive soon.

Small footsteps caught her attention. The boy came to her and took her other hand.

“Good. Let’s see what kind of flowers we can find.” She walked them out the door and heard angry voices spoiling the morning.

Libby hugged the children to her, but before she could turn to go back into the house, Andrew rode out of the barn.

He trotted his horse in front of her and glared. “Knew you was trouble the minute you showed up. Now you’ve cost me my job.” With a final scowl, he galloped away.

What was he talking about? Terrence hadn’t fired him because of her. She glanced to the barn and was startled to see her employer. His face was dark and scowling, whether his anger was aimed at her or the retreating former servant, she wasn’t sure.

Chapter 29

 

 

Sunlight clipped the treetops but failed to lighten the darkness in Wade’s heart. All yesterday, he’d tried to talk to Mark. The boy wouldn’t even look at him. Wade hoped this morning would bring a change.

Wade stretched but couldn’t shake the gloom. Heaviness pressed in and around him, lowering his head, bowing his shoulders. He walked to the fire, but all that remained was the dying light of burning embers.

He searched the camp for Dan. There was no sight of him. Surprisingly, Wade missed him. He trusted the old mountain man. Owed him. Dan tried to comfort Mark. The boy had spent most of yesterday with him.

Mark stumbled out of the tent, sorrow plagued his face. The boy glanced at him. As soon as their eyes met, Mark slipped his gaze to the ground and turned away. Shoulders slumped, he limped for the creek.

Wade grimaced. This day wasn’t going to be any better than the last one. He rummaged in the pack and pulled out bacon and eggs. Mr. Sweeny had stocked the provisions generously. He was a good man. Wade groaned. He longed to feel like a good man again. Soon, the aroma of sizzling bacon drifted on the light breeze. Maybe warm grub would help Mark’s mood.

A deep-throated shout of “Hallelujah” shattered the morning’s quiet. Startled, Wade dropped one of the eggs and whirled to see Dan lumbering toward him. Good thing the man called out. With his size, buffalo robe, and wild hair, Wade might’ve shot him thinking it was a grizzly.

“I smell bacon!” Dan thundered as he entered the camp. He looked around and narrowed his eyes. “Where’s the boy?”

Wade pointed to the creek. “He didn’t feel like talking. Went straight for the water.”

Rubbing his scruffy beard, Dan frowned. “Prayed all night about you two. Was hopin’ the Lord would’ve taken care of the rift between you and Mark by now.”

“I can’t believe I let the words spill out. Should’ve kept my mouth shut.” Wade forked the bacon, but thinking about the hurt on Mark’s face caused his appetite to disappear.

The big man pointed to the stream. “Maybe not. Things kept secret have a habit of sneakin’ out at the worst times. Best it’s out now. A sore can’t heal till you clean out the dirt.”

Against the background of nature’s splendor, Wade cringed at his hate-tarnished soul. The blackness in his heart hadn’t died with Taylor. Instead it’d festered and now lurked like wounded animal, waiting to lash out. Last thing he’d wanted was to hurt Mark. But Wade wasn’t so sure he wouldn’t let his feelings slip out again.

Dan shucked his buffalo robe, raised his arms, and faced the mountains. “Goin’ to be a wonderful day.” He turned and eyed Wade.

Wade’s skin crawled under the mountain man’s scrutiny.

“Now, I been thinkin’. I’ll care for the boy and give him some of my wisdom. You go on out there and meet with the Lord. It does a soul good. You are a Christian man?”

Anger rising, Wade nodded. Who did the old coot think he was ordering him around like some kind of preacher?

“I can see you’re not takin’ kindly to my thinkin’.” Dan looked into the sky and closed his eyes. After a moment, he wagged his shaggy head, clapped his huge hands, and grinned. “Yep. You’re supposed to meet with the Lord. Don’t worry son. He’s full a mercy.”

Wade bit off a piece of bacon.
Go out there and talk to the Lord and ask Him what?
He grabbed a rock and threw it at a dove cooing in a nearby tree. Remorse struck instantly. A quick glance at Dan added to his regret.

The gentle giant frowned in disapproval.

Wade thought the rage had gone, but Dan couldn’t understand the pain. The hate that drove him and threatened to explode at seeing Martin reflected in Mark’s face. Anger seethed inside Wade as he thought on how Dan talked about Taylor as if the murderer deserved compassion.

Dan knelt in front of him, his brown eyes shining. “Go on. You’ll know what to say when the time comes. When you return, I’ll have a nice catch of fish for ya. Now, I’ll go conversate with Mark.” He rose and headed toward the creek, not even looking back.

Stubborn rebellion told Wade to stay put and eat his breakfast. After one bite, he threw down the plate.
Crazy old man.
Deep inside, a yearning to discover what would happen moved Wade to his feet. Before he knew what he was doing, he was walking into the center of the meadow. With clenched fists, he vowed he’d be back long before lunch. He didn’t have much to say to God, and didn’t believe God had much to say to him. Didn’t believe he’d want to hear it if He did.

The sweet fragrance of spring surrounded him, but he scowled at the beauty. How far was he supposed walk? A startled rabbit jumped in front of him and hopped away. Wade slapped his hand to his side and frowned. Once again, he’d forgotten his gun. A mistake he couldn’t afford to make in this country.

In the midst of the meadow, a large boulder towered out of the rippling grass. A bold red stain in a sea of green. Good as any place to sit for a while. If God was going to meet him out here, it’d most likely be with lightning anyway.

The longer he sat, the angrier Wade became. Dan was probably laughing at him. Then Wade remembered the genuine caring in the old trapper’s eyes.

Memories of home, his parents and siblings, dinners around the table, and prayer. He’d believed in God as a kid. Even when the hard times set in, he’d still believed.

“Taylor,” he growled. The murderer had killed Wade’s faith along with his family.

So much for mercy. The blackness of revenge soaked his heart, and it wasn’t lessening. He hated Taylor as much today as that night of death.

Vengeance is mine, sayeth the Lord.

The words whispered through him. Wade glared at the pitted sides of the red boulder and then up into the clear blue sky. “I wanted to take my own revenge. Is that so wrong? Is it?”

No answer.

Just like he figured. How long did Dan expect him to sit out here? Waste of time.

An eagle shrieked.

The majestic bird soared on the wind. Free from earth’s bonds and troubles. A desire worked its way from some hidden place in Wade’s spirit. He longed to be free from the hate that had his life on the run. But try as he might, he couldn’t forget.

Forgive and you shall be forgiven.

Wade bolted to his feet. “Forgive Taylor after what he did? Never!” Heart pounding, Wade whirled and scanned the landscape. No one. He was yelling at a whisper of wind.

For Mark? For Libby?

Wade couldn’t breathe. Was he crazy? Was God telling him if he didn’t forgive Taylor that Mark and Libby were in danger? A crushing weight seized his chest.
Please, not again
. Whatever it took, he’d do anything to protect them.

He scowled and nailed his gaze into the sky. “I told, You. Kill me! Please don’t hurt Mark or Libby.”

Silence met his outburst. No birds. No breeze. No answer.

Wade was tired. Tired of fighting. Tired of running. Exhaustion sapped his strength and the desire to rail against a God he couldn’t see. Giving up, he slumped against the rock and gazed skyward. He stared at nothing, letting the silence speak for him.

After a time, he let his thoughts drift. He’d leave the boy with Dan and ride off. Then God would have no reason to hurt Mark or Libby.

Thinking of her dulled the hate in his heart but added anguish to his mind. If he was sure of anything, it was that he loved her. What he wouldn’t give to hold her right now. To build a cabin in this valley and bring her here. To live the rest of his life loving and providing for her.

He whom the Lord sets free is free indeed.

Crazy thoughts. Set free? Not likely. Wade shuddered. He’d done his best. Always worked hard to do what was right. But setting aside his hate for Taylor was one task he’d not been able to accomplish. He growled a low feral moan. “I tried to forgive the man. I can’t!”

Your hatred lashes out at Mark and separates you from Libby. My love overcomes. My love is stronger than hate and never fails.

Wade turned to the rock and pounded his fist against the boulder. “Don’t You understand. I can’t do it!”

Again and again, he struck the gritty rock until his blood mingled with the crimson dust of the boulder. Spent, he slumped to the ground.

“I can’t do it.” Over and over, he mumbled his failure, until even his voice was spent.

I died for you and forgave you. 

The words took his breath. Wade stared at his bleeding hand. His gaze darted skyward and back to the blood dripping onto thirsty ground.

Jesus.

A long-ago sacrifice on a cross.

Wade sat up and leaned against the rock. This was too much. The words came from nowhere and everywhere. Not loud, or a fiery bush, but quiet whispers in his soul. A tear fell, followed by another. Grief for his family swelled until he could no longer stop his soul’s rain of sorrow.

Broken, he surrendered. “God forgive me. Help me forgive.”

Quiet blanketed him inside and out. Light cracked the darkness. He wasn’t alone. A presence comforted him and gave him strength.

Again the eagle soared overhead, calling out as if he owned the world. Wade stood and wiped the blood from his hand. For the first time in a long time, his heart was light. “Wasn’t much of a prayer, but I guess it’s a start. Now, help me talk to Mark.”

Wade glanced at the blood-stained boulder and patted the rough rock as if it were an old friend. He turned and walked toward camp his step lighter, his burdens left behind, and the presence of peace walking with him.

Everything appeared brighter, from the yellow and purple flowers to the multiple shades of green on the grass and trees. He felt new. He was no longer at war with God. Better yet, he somehow understood God wasn’t at war with him and never had been.

By the angle of the sun, several hours had passed, though it seemed he’d been in the field for only a few minutes. He wasn’t sure if he had the meeting with God that Dan thought he should, but life was suddenly full of light.

Nearing the camp, Wade saw Dan and Mark sitting by the fire.
The boy
. Wade wasn’t leaving him. Somehow in the Lord’s plans, he and Mark belonged together. Soon, he’d find out if his harsh words the night before had ruined their partnership.

“I see you have my fish sizzling.”

Dan grinned. “Yep, and by the looks of you, I think you had your talk.”

“Let’s just say God and I made a truce. Not sure of a lot of things, but I think it’s a start.” Wade gazed at Mark.

BOOK: Liberty Belle
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