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Authors: Michael Thomas Ford

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“It sounds like he stole a little more than that,” said Walter. “I’d have decked him too.” He looked at Jane and grinned. “In fact, I believe I threatened to do exactly that.”

“Boys,” Jane said. “You’re all impossible.” Despite what she said, she reached out and took Walter’s hand.

“Who
is
that guy?” Kelly asked. “Some kind of bisexual writer kung-fu expert, or what? And how weird is it that right after you had a run-in with him he came on to Bryce?”

“Not as weird as you might think,” Jane said. “Speaking of which, how are you feeling about things with Bryce?”

Kelly waved a hand in the air. “I don’t know,” he replied. “I’ve been with the man for almost ten years. And I guess if I was willing to fight for him, I must still love him. He’s going to owe me big time, though. We’re talking a trip to Europe, or maybe a country house.” He bit his lip, then raised an eyebrow. “Besides, I have to admit, there really is something about Brian.”

“Don’t you even think about it,” Jane said quickly.

Kelly laughed. “Don’t worry. I’ll be a good boy.” He stood up. “And now it’s off to bed for me. This has been more than enough excitement for this city boy. I had no idea you country folk were so wild.”

“Wait until tomorrow,” Walter told him. “We’re planning a barn raising.”

Kelly went upstairs, leaving Jane and Walter alone. Jane still hadn’t let go of Walter’s hand. Holding it was reassuring. He was something solid to cling to, something real and warm and safe.
I could sit like this forever
, she thought.

“I like him,” Walter said.

“Like who?” Jane asked.

“Kelly,” said Walter. “To tell you the truth, I was sort of hoping he’d say things are over with this Bryce guy. I was going to set him up with Hank.”

“Hank?” said Jane. “You mean your electrician Hank?” She got a mental picture of Walter’s longtime friend and sometime co-worker. He was a big man, with a thick beard and hands that reminded Jane of bear paws.

Walter nodded. “Big Hank,” he confirmed.

“I had no idea,” said Jane. “Anyway, I don’t think they’d have much in common.”

“There you go, making assumptions again,” said Walter. “Isn’t that what you thought about us?”

“Not at all,” Jane said. “Well, perhaps a little,” she admitted.

“Hank might surprise you too,” Walter told her. “And look at Kelly there. He threw a pretty mean punch. I wouldn’t be surprised if pretty boy’s nose is a little bit crooked after this.”

I wouldn’t count on that
, Jane thought. More likely, Byron had already healed from the encounter, as well as from the minor
wounds Charlotte had inflicted. As for Charlotte, Jane really wasn’t terribly worried about her. Now that she’d revealed herself, she likely would be afraid to try anything more. Still, Jane would be on the lookout.

Walter squeezed her hand, and Jane looked at him. He had a somewhat worried expression on his face. “There’s something I’ve been meaning to ask you,” he said. “It’s a bit difficult for me to say.”

Here it comes
, Jane thought. Her heart sank. Walter had figured out that there was something not quite right about her. He was going to tell her that they couldn’t be together after all.

“Things have been moving very quickly, and I feel that—” Walter began. But before he could continue he was interrupted by Jasper, who ran into the living room. He woofed and looked meaningfully toward the kitchen.

“You already had dinner,” Jane reminded him.

Jasper woofed again.

“I think he wants to go out,” said Walter.

“Of course,” Jane said. “I’ll take him. You just hold that thought.”

She jumped up and hurried into the kitchen. She was relieved to get away from Walter. She knew what he was going to say, and she wasn’t ready for it.
Just when I decided that ‘maybe things can work
, she thought sadly as she opened the back door and watched Jasper run into the yard. She stepped outside and shut the door behind her.

“I suppose it was inevitable,” she said.

“What was?” Byron stepped out of the shadows, startling her.

“Why must you do things like that?” Jane asked him. “Can’t you just ring the bell like other people?”

Byron looked up at the moon, which was full and round.
“First, I’m not like other people,” he said. “Second, I don’t think Walter would be very keen to see me right now.”

“I don’t think it will matter after tonight,” said Jane. “I think he’s about to end things.”

Byron laughed.

“Why is that funny?” Jane asked him. “Don’t think it means I’ll come running to you.”

“Oh, I think I know better now,” said Byron. “Besides, I have a new distraction.”

“That’s another thing,” Jane said. “Why did you have to go and seduce Bryce?”

Byron held his hands up in protest. “That was entirely accidental,” he said. “I had no idea he was connected to you. It was a happy coincidence.”

“Not so happy for Kelly,” Jane snapped. “He’s very hurt. Oh, and don’t think I don’t know that the only way you could get Bryce was by glamoring him.”

Byron looked hurt. “Are you saying I’m losing my looks?”

“Unfortunately, no,” said Jane. “But I know those two are very much in love.”

“Yes, well, then it might amuse you to know that Bryce phoned me earlier today and told me in no uncertain terms that things are over.”

“See!” Jane said. “Serves you right.” Then something occurred to her. “What are you doing here, anyway?”

“It’s a beautiful night,” said Byron.

“You’re hunting!” Jane accused.

“Not hunting,” said Byron. “Watching. For Charlotte.”

“You don’t think she’ll come back?” Jane said.

“No,” Byron said. “At least not for some time. But I don’t want to take any chances.”

“I think I can handle her myself if need be,” said Jane.

“Actually,” Byron said, “I don’t think you can.” His voice suddenly took on a serious tone. “Charlotte isn’t the only one we have to worry about.”

Jane looked at him. “What do you mean?”

“You know that throughout the years there have been vigilantes who have sought to eradicate our kind.”

Jane shuddered. She knew all too well the people to whom Byron was referring—well-known personages whose special skills had led them to be recruited as vampire hunters. One name in particular came to her, and instinctively her fangs descended as she recalled their last meeting—and the taste of the woman’s infamous coq au vin. “Of course I do,” she said.

“There has been renewed activity,” Byron told her, his voice taking on a worried tone. “Rumblings of a resurgence. This incident with Charlotte may have … repercussions. Particularly now that you’ve raised your profile.”

“Wonderful,” Jane sighed.

“It would be wise to be prepared for any eventuality,” Byron continued. “There are things we can do, Jane—things
you
can do—that you aren’t even aware of. You’ve barely tapped the possibilities.”

“I don’t know what you mean,” Jane said.

“You’ve never been taught,” said Byron. “You’ve spent so many years apart from your own kind that you don’t even know what you are.”

Jane looked into his face.
He’s telling the truth
, she thought.

“I can teach you,” Byron told her. “If you’ll let me.”

“I knew it,” Jane said. “For the last time, I am
not
going away with you.”

“I’m not asking you to,” Byron replied. “I can stay here.”

“Here?” Jane repeated.

“Not
here,”
Byron said, nodding at the house. “But here in Brakeston.”

“Are you mad?” said Jane.

“Probably,” Byron said. “But it’s time I made things up to you, and I can start by showing you what you really are. Besides, I already have the house.”

Jasper, who had marked every bush in the yard, ran over to where they were standing. Byron bent to pet him, but Jasper growled. “He never did like me,” Byron said.

“He’s a good judge of character,” said Jane.

“I’ll go if you tell me to go,” said Byron. “I swear I will. But please consider my offer.”

Jane started to tell him to leave. Getting rid of him once and for all would make things much easier for her. But then she thought about what he was offering her.
What kinds of things can I do?
she wondered. Was there really more to being undead than just being undead?

“I’ll think about it,” she said quickly, before she could change her mind. “In the meantime, stay away from Lucy. I suppose you’ve figured out she isn’t really one of us.”

“I have,” said Byron. “But it was a good ploy.”

“Thank you,” Jane said. “But I mean it—stay away from her.”

“What if I promise not to turn her?” Byron asked. “I have to say, I’m rather fond of her. She has quite a spirit.”

“Don’t make me change my mind,” Jane threatened. “Now go. We’ll talk more tomorrow.”

Byron nodded good night and disappeared into the shadows. Jane herded Jasper back into the kitchen, where he stopped to
get a drink. Jane continued on to the living room. Only when she saw Walter sitting there did she remember that she’d run away from what was certain to be bad news.

“That was a long pee,” Walter remarked.

“Wasn’t it?” said Jane. Her mind had gone fuzzy, and she couldn’t think straight.
He’s going to dump me
, she thought. She sat down and kept her hands in her lap, afraid to reach for Walter’s hand lest he pull away from her.

“As I was saying,” Walter said. He cleared his throat. “This is harder than I expected.”

“You don’t have to—” said Jane.

“Yes, I do,” Walter said. “It’s something I should have said a long time ago.”

Jane’s heart fluttered wildly. All of a sudden she felt not like a woman of 234 but like a girl of 18. All of her years of experience disappeared in an instant. Lifetimes no longer mattered. Walter was about to break her heart as if it were the very first time.

“I love you,” Walter said.

Jane stared at him.
What did he just say?
she asked herself.

“I know you don’t want to hear that,” said Walter. He was speaking quickly, stumbling over his words in an uncharacteristically anxious way. “I know I’m probably going to scare you off. But it’s true, Jane. I do love you. And if that frightens you, then I can accept—”

“I love you too,” said Jane, stopping him.

He looked at her for a long time. “You do?”

Jane nodded. “I do,” she repeated.

Walter opened his mouth, then closed it again. He repeated this several times.

“You’re looking a bit like a fish,” Jane teased.

“I’m afraid if I talk I’ll wake up,” said Walter.

Jane took his hand in hers. “You won’t wake up,” she said. “Unless, of course, you mean in my bed in the morning.”

Walter stood up, pulling Jane to her feet. He took her in his arms and kissed her for a long time. When he broke away he continued to hold her against him. She looked into his eyes, seeing in them everything she’d been longing for.

“Jane Fairfax,” Walter said, “are you propositioning me?”

“Yes, Walter Fletcher,” said Jane. “That’s exactly what I’m doing.”

Walter kissed her again. “It’s about time,” he said, taking her by the hand and leading her toward the stairs.

Acknowledgments

Many thanks to Liz Scheier (for starting it), Caitlin Alexander (for finishing it), Mitchell Waters (for championing it), John Scognamiglio (for loaning me out), and Patrick Crowe and the Fur People (for everything else).

About the Author

M
ICHAEL
T
HOMAS
F
ORD
is the author of numerous books, including the novels
What We Remember, Suicide Notes, Changing Tides, Full Circle, Looking for It
, and
Last Summer
. Visit him at
www.michaelthomasford.com
.

Our favorite heroine returns in
Michael Thomas Ford’s

Jane Goes Batty

Hollywood VIPs have descended on Jane’s sleepy town in upstate New York to film the movie version of
Constance
. As if that’s not bad enough, a terribly intrusive team of cameramen has been following Jane around, filming her every move for a reality TV show Of course, the Janeites have decided to hold their annual convention in Brakeston at the same time, and there are never fewer than ten women in period costumes trailing behind Jane or peering in her windows. Dear Walter has been asked to restore a house for the movie set, so he’s off in his own world of special plasters and varnished wood. Meanwhile, Byron insists on teaching Jane a few new vampire tricks. And something is really
off
about those twins who’ve been hired to work at the bookstore …

Keep those fangs in check, Jane!

Coming soon from Ballantine Books

Jane Bites Back
is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

A Ballantine Books Trade Paperback Original

Copyright © 2010 by Michael Thomas Ford

All rights reserved.

Published in the United States by Ballantine Books, an imprint of The Random House Publishing Group, a division of Random House, Inc., New York.

B
ALLANTINE
and colophon are registered trademarks of Random House, Inc.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Ford, Michael Thomas.
Jane bites back: a novel / Michael Thomas Ford.
p. cm.
eISBN: 978-0-345-51900-9
1. Austen, Jane, 1775–1817—Fiction. 2. Vampires—Fiction.
3. Women novelists—Fiction. 4. Women booksellers—Fiction. I. Title.
PS3606.O7424J36 2010
813′.6—d22 2009043773

www.ballantinebooks.com

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