Hungry for Love (54 page)

It was all so frustrating—he hadn
’
t been like this in years.  Every day at lunchtime he called
,
to say hello to Laura.  Sometimes she answered the phone
,
but rarely did she linger in a conversation.  How did it come to be that what formerly was an innocent hobby—chasing after a woman he wanted but wanted only for an hour or two—had devolved into him chasing after his own wife
?
  His life had been upended and it was disorienting and Kevin felt out of sorts on a constant basis.  He knew he should have sex—with someone—anyone—just to see if he could do it.  His heart filled with terror at the possibility of having that same problem again.  At least once a day he thought of taking a drive over to Angie
’
s to see if they could do it at last
,
but something inside of him said no
,
and he didn
’
t bother.  This was what depression was like.  Kevin was depressed
,
and he knew it.

It was time to face facts—he loved his wife and he wanted her back.  Divorce was quick in
California
—it took only six months.  He had to do something now
,
not linger around wishing things were different.  He had to make them different.  Kevin knew one thing: he was a charmer
,
had always been so.  There wasn
’
t a woman around who could resist him for long.  Hadn
’
t he charmed Laura in the first place
,
hadn
’
t he stolen her from that guy she was dating after college
?
  And now they were married with a child and a home and on some level she must want to preserve it.  He had to step it up
,
rev up the charm
,
and make Laura want him again.  Surely it wouldn
’
t be that difficult.

Laura was aware of what was on Kevin
’
s mind but she couldn
’
t decide if it was exciting or merely amusing in a kind of pathetic way.  When he tapped softly on the kitchen door one night at dinner time
,
Julie let him in and squealed happily at the heart shaped boxes of chocolates he
’
d brought for each of them.

“
Oh a Valentine!
”
said Julie.

“
The best part is after you eat the chocolate
,”
said Kevin.

“
You mean saving the box to put stuff in
?”
asked Julie
,
stuffing two pieces into her mouth.

“
Dinner is in a few minutes
,”
said Laura
,
setting her box unopened on the counter. 
“
Only one piece now
,
Julie.
”

“
I can
’
t just spit it out—that would be rude
,”
said Julie
,
speaking with her mouth very full of candy.

Kevin laughed. 
“
Nope there
’
s something under the candy.
”

Julie went scrounging through her box of candy
,
moving each piece around until she found a little velvet pouch.  She quickly popped another piece of candy into her mouth then opened the pouch
,
which contained a little silver necklace with a tiny heart dangling from it. 
“
Oh wow!  Put it on me
,
put it on me
,”
she said excitedly.  After Kevin fastened it around her neck
,
Julie ran off to look at herself in a mirror.

“
Aren
’
t you going to look in yours
?”
he asked Laura.

“
Do you think I
’
m that easily confused
?”
Laura replied.  She watched as Kevin opened the large candy box and gingerly removed another velvet pouch.  From it he spilled into his hand a necklace with a sparkling heart-shaped diamond solitaire.  Kevin had very nice hands and very good taste in jewelry.

Laura sighed. 
“
It
’
s beautiful.  But I wish you hadn
’
t….
”

“
I know I
’
ve been a jerk and for a long time I haven
’
t acted like much of a husband.  I just wanted you to know you
’
re the only woman I
’
ve ever given my heart to and you still have it.
”

Julie ran back in the room before Laura could reply and said
,
“
I
’
ll set a place at the table for Daddy.
”

“
Smells good
,”
said Kevin
,
looking at Laura.

“
Roast beef
,”
said Julie
,
“
Your fave.
”

Laura sighed again and handed Julie a plate and some silverware.

Kevin thought the dinner had gone pretty well and after Julie had her bath and was tucked into bed
,
he lingered to talk to his wife. 
“
Thank you for letting me stay
,”
he said rather humbly
,
“
I
’
ve missed this so much.
”

“
Julie was happy to have you here
,”
said Laura.

“
Only Julie
?”

“
Go home
,
Kevin.
”

“
I thought I was.
”

Laura opened the back door and Kevin morosely walked back to his cabana.  It was clear he would have to try harder.  Kevin would have to woo his wife
,
seduce his wife.  This was something he could do
,
something he
’
d done many times before with many women.  It was just harder with a pissed off woman
,
he knew that
,
but didn
’
t she have a certain softness in her eyes when she saw the diamond
?
  Kevin thought maybe she did. 

Another first date
,
thought Bill.  No wonder everyone hated dating.  He didn
’
t actually know if people hated dating but he assumed that must be true.  Here he was
,
in another restaurant
,
across from another woman
,
square one.  How did people have the time and energy for it
?
  He wondered should he try to become a better sport and consider it more of an adventure.  He
’
d hardly dated at all when he was young
,
here and there in high school and in his second year of college he
’
d met JoEllen.  Then the dating stopped and real life began.  If there were a way now to fast forward past all this crap and resume real life
,
Bill would be delighted
,
but hadn
’
t he tried that with Chrissy and look where it had led.  At least he
’
d learned a lesson and had become hyper vigilant.  Where before he gravitated toward women who physically reminded him of JoEllen
,
he was currently so spooked by his year with Chrissy that now he strenuously avoided them.

The current interviewee
,
as he
’
d begun calling them
,
was thus not a pert redhead but a sultry brunette
,
but perhaps she seemed sultry only because she was so enraged.  It started hopefully enough with a mellow exchange about the school soccer program and some laughs about the parent volunteers who
’
d gone too far overboard about getting high scores and winning the matches. 

In the middle of this benign conversation
,
Erin
had looked over Bill
’
s shoulder emitting a staccato gasp
,
“
It
’
s Henry.  With a hooker.  At this posh restaurant.
”

Bill discretely turned his head and glanced in the direction Erin indicated but saw only a normal man with one sort of typical
Beverly Hills
woman
,
low cut dress
,
fake boobs
,
too much jewelry. 
“
I don
’
t think she
’
s a hooker
,”
said Bill.