Read Holly Hearts Hollywood Online
Authors: Kenley Conrad
Tags: #social issues, #young adult, #love and romance, #self esteem, #contemporary romance
“I didn’t want to hurt you,” I said pleadingly. All I wanted her to do was to give me some kind of indication that we could still be friends, despite all of this.
“Do you think I want to be this girl?” Lacey said with sudden strength. “Do you think I enjoy having my every move monitored by my mother, my agent, and the label? Do you think it’s fun to have people with cameras following me every second, just waiting for me to make a mistake? And do you think I liked hearing my boyfriend—someone I cared about so much—tell me he’s in love with my best friend? Not to mention the fact that I have to pretend to be with him so my career—the only thing I have going for me, apparently—doesn’t go up in smoke.” She leaned in close to me, and I swear I could actually smell the salt from her tears. “I don’t actually feel like being friends, Holly.” She sniffed loudly and leaned back. “I hope you enjoy Grayson behind closed doors, because I’ll be enjoying him way more where it counts: in front of cameras and screaming crowds.”
She turned and walked out of the hotel before I could blink.
My life has officially turned into a teenage soap opera. Is Grayson going to be worth it? Will he be worth losing Lacey as a friend and putting myself in Mr. Salazar’s line of fire?
I don’t want to think about the answers to these questions.
I just hope Lacey changes her mind. I miss her already.
Later, 11:45am—JFK International Airport
I wanted to write in the car like I usually do, but Grayson sat beside me and held my hand, so I thought it’d be rude. Also, I like holding his hand. It’s so big and warm and scratchy from his calluses. Lacey took a different car, which I guess wasn’t surprising, considering our earlier conversation, but it was sad to see her climb into that other car. She had on a huge sweatshirt and had stuffed her hair into a beanie. I could barely recognize her, especially with her giant bug-like sunglasses.
When we got to the airport, I tried my best to act the same toward her, as if nothing had happened.
“Good morning, Lacey,” I said cheerily, as if it was the first time I had spoken to her all day. I was trying to pretend like our earlier conversation had never happened.
I imagine she looked over at me, but her eyes were shielded behind her sunglasses. “Hello,” she said coolly.
“We’re going to miss the flight if we don’t hurry,” Grayson said from behind me. Lacey turned on her heels and walked into the airport without a word.
We’re on the tarmac now, waiting to take off. I can’t even sit next to Grayson on the plane. Someone might snap a photo of us and sends it to TMZ. It was a risk to ride to the airport alone in the first place. I don’t know what he and Lacey are talking about, but it doesn’t look like they’re saying much of anything to each other. Lacey is flipping furiously through a magazine. I’m surprised she hasn’t ripped a page yet.
I always thought a secret relationship sounded romantic and fun, but I’m starting to second-guess that. Ugh, I feel awful about Lacey. How am I going to explain this to Serena?
Oh! Grayson looked over his shoulder and winked at me. How adorable. Darn it, the flight attendants are telling us to put our trays up. LA here we come!
Later, 8:30pm—Car ride home
I’ve decided to think positively about this whole thing. The whole plane ride home, I worked on my homework instead of writing in here. I even finished reading
To Kill a Mockingbird
, and let me tell you, it was hard to remain positive during that experience.
Every once in a while, Grayson would glance over at me and give me a knowing smile, and that kept me going. But all the while, I kept thinking about the fact that more sacrifices could still be around the corner. For all I know, Grayson could break up with me next week and then what? Do I ignore Lacey and Grayson for the rest of my life?
I decided to not dwell on it. I knew I’d give myself an anxiety attack. When we landed at LAX, I immediately had all sorts of flashbacks to the first time I arrived here, back when I was completely unaware of the adventures ahead and the friendships awaiting me. And I thought I’d be back home in Iowa in just a few days! Now I can‘t imagine living anywhere else.
We walked off the plane with our carry-ons. Grayson walked up beside me and said quietly in my ear, “That was the longest flight I’ve ever been on.”
I shrugged. “I don’t know, I’ve heard the flight to Sydney is the longest flight in the world.” The moment the words left my mouth, I realized he was flirting and not trying to be literal.
He chuckled. “Anything is long when you have an ice queen for company.” He paused. “I missed you.”
“I missed you too,” I whispered back. “Now go. We don’t want the paparazzi to get suspicious,” I joked.
He laughed and went back to get his carry-on from the overhead compartment. We walked off the plane first, as we were traveling first-class, and headed toward Arrivals where I knew my mom would be waiting for me with a big smile and hug.
As we got closer, it got louder. After a minute, it sounded like a swarm of bugs. When we rounded the corner, I saw why. The room was filled with reporters and photographers. When they saw Lacey and Grayson, they went wild.
“Lacey! Are you excited to start rehearsals for your tour?”
“Are you worried about the strain the tour will have on your relationship?”
I couldn’t even see my mom, one of the only people I genuinely wanted to talk to. My mouth tasted sour. I took deep breaths, suddenly feeling very anxious. Lacey and Grayson walked past me and up to the foray of reporters. Ryan and the other bodyguards had appeared magically around them.
I wanted to call out to Grayson, wanting to see him smile at me one last time. I was waiting and hoping that maybe he’d turn around and run toward me. He’d kiss me in front of all of those photographers, no longer caring about the tour or his career. But he didn’t. He kept on walking with Lacey, their fingers intertwined, and my heart sank like a stone.
I realized then that I don’t know if I can do this. I don’t know if I can watch him be with her when I’m supposed to be his girlfriend. What if he falls in love with her during all their fake canoodling?
They walked through the reporters and the flashing camera lights, disappearing in the sea of people. I stood there, completely alone. No one looked at me. No one cared. I was ready to turn around and get on a plane, any plane, when the sea of people thinned just enough for me to see Grayson and Lacey kissing passionately for the cameras. The crowd went wild.
I realized I had made a terrible mistake.
THE END
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
There are so many amazing people in my life; I don’t even know where to start. Firstly, a huge thank you to my wonderful agent, Terrie. Thanks for listening to me groan, rant, and babble on about characters we’ve both come to love so much. To Georgia and everyone else at Swoon Romance: thank you for believing in Holly and me. A big thanks to my editor, Nichole, for wading through my first and final drafts! Thank you to my parents for putting a book in my left hand and a pencil in my right hand. I wouldn’t be here without you. There were so many fantastic people who read this book in its early stages and gave me their thoughts and edits: Ashley Maker, Rachel Morrow, Jacqueline Rushing, Kelly Fulcher, and many more who I hope will forgive me for not calling them by name. A huge thanks to Ian and Sam who encouraged me and gave me inspiration in a jar. Okay, it was actually a candle, but it was the best smelling candle ever. A huge thank you to the real-life Meredith who’s support throughout these last few years has been invaluable. This book wouldn’t be the same without you. To the real-life Amanda, you’re an amazing and supportive friend. Thank you for showing me what good friendship looks like.
Kenley Conrad
Kenley is a twenty-something cat lady who lives in Phoenix, Arizona. When she’s not working her office day job or writing books, you can find her either singing and dancing or binge-watching TV shows on Netflix.
Twitter:
@kenleyconrad
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