Forgive Me (Callaway Book 2) (23 page)

They walked out of the bedroom hand in hand. When they reached the bedroom he'd spent most of his life in, she squeezed his hand in support. He smiled when he saw a dark-haired little girl dressed in one of his old shirts sitting up on the bed, looking at the pictures on his wall. When he saw her, his whole world stopped. His mom had been right; there was no denying she was his. She was so beautiful it made his heart ache.

He took a deep breath and knocked on the open door, watching her face attentively as she laid eyes on him for the first time. "May I come in?"

Her big, brown eyes shined with curiosity and to his surprise, he didn't see any fear or uncertainty in Lucy's face as she answered him with a simple, "Yes." His heart filled itself with joy at the sound of his little girl's voice.

He stepped into the room, glancing at Amanda who gave him a supportive look. He didn't know where to sit, so he leaned against the dresser on the other side of the bed. "Did you sleep okay?" he asked, hoping he wouldn't ruin this first interaction.

She looked at him with big, sad eyes, and his heart broke a little when she spoke. "I missed my bunny."

He was going to have to ask his mom if she still had some of Becca's old stuffed animals and anything else they could find in storage. "Well, I don't have a bunny, but I'm sure we can find something else to keep you company. My mom kept all my sister's stuffed animals."

"Are you my dad?" she asked, like it was the most natural question in the world.

He hadn't expected her to come out and ask that, and he didn't know what to say. Was there a correct answer to something like that? Should he ask if her mom had told her anything about her dad? He gathered himself and opted to go with the truth. "Yeah, I am."

She glanced down at her knees and for a moment, he thought she was going to cry. However, before he could ask her if she was all right, she looked up at him a bit nervously. "My mommy only had one picture of you, and you were sleeping, so I didn't see your face. We have the same hair, see?" She took her hair in her little hand and pulled it to the side to show him, and he smiled at her. She was obviously very smart, and she was handling this much better than he was.

He sat down next to her on the bed, careful not to get too close to her, not wanting to startle her. "Yeah, we do. Lucy, can I ask you if you know where your mom is?" He hated asking her that, but they had to get all the facts if they had any chance at making this work.

"She just said I was going to stay with you for a while, 'cause she needed a break. But I'll try to be quiet, and I won't make noise. I promise," she told him, almost like she was afraid he wasn't going to keep her. He hated seeing that look on his child's face. Hell, when they were younger, he and his brothers made more noise than a rock band; that was what children were supposed to do, right?

He took her little hand in his and when she smiled at him, he knew they would be okay. It wouldn't be easy, far from it, but she was his flesh and blood and he wouldn't let her down. "It's okay, Lucy. You can make as much noise as you want. I don't mind one bit."

"Is this your house?" She was full of questions, and that was when he realized Amanda was right. She was leading this conversation, and he was thankful for it because he had no idea what he was doing.

"No, this is my mom's house. You met her last night."

She smiled at him and when she moved closer, he held his breath. "Is she the one who tucked me in? She's pretty, and she was really nice. My mom never tucks me in."

"Yeah, that's her. That's your grandma, and she loves to spoil little girls," he managed to get out past the chunk of emotions building in his throat. This was real, this was his daughter. He closed his eyes briefly to get himself under control.

"I never had a grandma before. Can I call her grandma?" She sounded so sad telling him that, which just raised even more questions about her mother and the life they had before.

"Yes, you can. She's really happy to have you as her granddaughter. She's always saying she wants more girls in the family." He heard Amanda laughing from the doorway, like a balm to his soul.

"What about you? Are you happy I'm here?"

"I'm really happy, too, honey. But I've got to tell you, I don't know much about being a dad. I'm probably going to make a lot of mistakes, so you'll have to teach me a lot of things. We're going to learn this together," he told her, remembering how Amanda said it was important to make Lucy feel like she was part of building something.

She nodded and said, "Okay." He watched as her eyes travelled to where Amanda stood. When she saw her, Lucy pointed. "Who is that?"

Drew looked over to Amanda, who was smiling at the both of them. He opened his hand for Amanda to come sit with them. "That is my girlfriend, Amanda. Amanda, this is Lucy."

"You are very pretty, Lucy," Amanda told the little angel, making her smile like she had just given her the moon.

"Thank you. You have pretty hair," Lucy said as she reached to touch Amanda's hair.

He watched as the woman he loved more than anything in the world leaned forward and stroked Lucy's hair, the same way his little girl was stroking hers. "You think so? Maybe we can braid each other's hair."

"Really? You would do that?" Something inside of him ached when he saw the combination of doubt and happiness on Lucy's face, once again reinforcing the million questions he had. They would most likely never be answered if Lucy's mom never came back, though.

He saw something soften in Amanda's expression, like she was thinking the same thing he was: what kind of childhood had Lucy had so far? "Of course, and we can bake cookies, too."

Lucy looked down at the comforter on the bed as she spoke the words that made his ache grow into something almost unbearable. "My mommy says I'm too messy to be in the kitchen. When we have food, she asks me to stay out."

"Well, I think there is no such thing as being too messy in the kitchen." He was thankful to have Amanda with him because he wanted to punch something. She was a goddamn child. What kind of mother told her daughter to be quiet and that she was too messy to bake? He had a feeling that was only the beginning of things that would piss him off.

He didn't like it and he wanted to scream, but when Lucy asked her next question, his anger was the least important thing in the world. "Did my mommy leave me because I was bad?"

"No, honey. She left you with us because she needs some time to herself. It has nothing to do to you."

"Do you have a dog?" she asked, looking between him and Amanda.

He smiled when Amanda ruffled her hair. "I do, and he loves little girls with brown hair."

"Sorry to interrupt, but I found some of Becca's childhood things, stuff when she was a child, and I thought Lucy might like some clean clothes." He loved his mom for being such a kind and generous soul. She dropped the box of clothes on the dresser then looked at him. "Everyone is in the kitchen if you have a minute."

The last thing he wanted to do was leave Lucy, but he also knew they needed to talk about this as a family, although he had every intention of keeping this conversation short and to the point. What he wanted to do was take Lucy and Amanda home and start figuring out what came next.

Amanda squeezed his hand. "Why don't I stay here with Lucy and braid her hair while you go down to the kitchen. We'll be okay."

"Okay. I'll be right back, Lucy, and then we'll go home." He kissed the top of her hair before he could stop himself. It had come over him so naturally, he hadn't had time to process the thought before acting on it. When she put her tiny hands around him and hugged him, he felt the tears running down his face but he didn't care. He didn't know how long they stayed like that, but when she pulled away, Amanda was crying, too. He kissed her as tamely as possible, conscious of the four-year-old looking at them.

He was at the door when he turned around at the sound of laughter. Amanda and Lucy were in a tickling fight on his bed, and he swore it was the prettiest sight he'd ever seen. Forcing himself to walk away, he headed to the kitchen to face the choir. He walked into the room where his brothers and sister were all standing, obviously anxious. His mom poured him a cup of coffee, and he knew he had to make this short and fast if he wanted to get out of there anytime soon.

"Let's get this done so I can take Lucy and Amanda home. I didn't know I had a daughter until last night, and I don't know who her mother is. But at this point, in this moment, it's not relevant because she obviously didn't care about her enough to stick around. We are all that little girl has, so we need to make the best of it."

"How do you even know she's yours, Drew?" John asked in the same tone his brother used when he was trying to decide something.

"One look at her and I know. I'll have a DNA test done just to make sure, but I don't have any doubts. Now, Amanda and I have decided it would be best to move in together. We've practically been doing it anyway; it was going to happen with or without Lucy. I know you all have a million questions, and I do, too, but I don't have any answers right now. What I really want to do is take both of my girls home and get to know my daughter before everyone else gets involved." He looked around the room, hoping no one would press him on this.

"We get it. We'll be up at the cabin, so if you need us you just have to call. You can do this, Drew. You're going to be a great dad," Cole told him from the table, looking as tired as he felt. Drew hated that this happened on his brother's wedding night. As if Cole could read his mind, he looked at him. "Don't even think it, man. You didn't plan this. It isn't on you."

"Becca, do you still have any of your old stuffed animals? Lucy was talking about a bunny this morning, and I just want her to have something she can hold on to." His sister looked to be in physical pain at the situation, which was strange.

"Mom and I will look in the attic for whatever we can find, and I'll drop it off at the house later. We'll find her something," Becca told him before kissing his cheek and walking out of the kitchen like the room was on fire. He made a mental note to ask her about what was going on later.

"Do you need anything from us?" He looked at Nick as his brother spoke to him, and then it hit him that they probably didn't have child-friendly food at the house.

"If one of you could make a run to the grocery store to get things kids like, it would help us a lot. Mom, maybe you could go with them?" He glanced at his mom, who was beaming at him with pride in his eyes, and he hope he would earn it.

"Sure, honey. Now, you go take your girls home." His mom kissed his cheek and with one deep breath, he went back upstairs and prepped himself for the changes about to happen.

The second Amanda had seen Lucy, she knew she was Drew's daughter. She had the same hair and eyes as Drew; the resemblance was undeniable. Leaning against the doorframe, listening to Drew and Lucy talk, she felt something snap open inside. Some people say she fell in love with Drew at first sight when she was just a little girl. Well, standing there looking at Lucy, Amanda was pretty sure she was in love with the little princess staring at Drew like he was the strongest man in the world.

On the drive home from the ranch, Amanda hadn't been able to stop replaying what Lucy had said about not making noise, and being too messy to bake. It broke her heart to see such a loving and caring child be so afraid of being a child. They were surrounded by unknown elements, but in that moment, she made a promise that she would do whatever she could to make sure Lucy was happy. She had no idea where things stood with the girl's mother, if the woman would ever be back, but she did know Lucy was a part of their lives for the time being.

When they pulled into the driveway, Amanda looked at her newly renovated house like everything suddenly made sense. Her dad always used to say that when something needed fixing in your life, it was because something better was on its way. As she looked between the house and the little girl in the backseat, she knew her dad was smiling down on them from Heaven.

"Wow, is this your house?" Amanda turned around in her seat to face Lucy, who was wide-eyed at the sight of her home, and she couldn't help but wonder where she had lived before.

"Yes, and you can even have your own room. You can decorate it, too. Right now, it's white, so you can pick a color, and whatever else you want." She looked down when she felt Drew's hand close on top of hers. He stared at her with so much love in his eyes, and she couldn't wrap her head around why he would ever think that he wouldn't be a good father. He had all the best qualities a dad could have. He might not know it yet, but he was going to be an amazing father.

"Can it be pink? With bunnies?" Lucy asked them, clapping her hands like she had just been given the best gift in the world.

Amanda looked at Drew and let him answer. "That sounds perfect to me. I love bunnies."

Tango had gone completely crazy when they walked inside the house, and the instant Lucy had started petting him, she had that dog wrapped around her little finger. As Amanda walked around, she couldn't quite pinpoint what was different until they were went upstairs and saw the bed and dresser in the spare bedroom. Drew had seemed just as confused as she had been until they saw the note pinned on the dresser:
Picked this up early this morning for your little princess! Hope she likes it! John and Abby