Faithful Heart (25 page)

Tillman remained silent. Jerrod had pounded him so hard, he was dizzy and nauseous. He had nothing to say.

When they reached the sheriff’s office, Clancy McBride stood with his mouth open when he saw Jerrod Harper shove Marty Tillman through the door. Clancy locked Tillman up in his cell, and the Harpers sat down in the office to wait for Donner and Hall to return.

Jerrod told the entire story to McBride, and as the hours passed, they discussed Jerrod’s mental problem. The sun was setting when Donner and Hall finally rode up in front of the office and dismounted. The instant the two lawmen entered, surprise showed on their faces.

“Jerrod!” the sheriff exclaimed. “You’re … you’re back!”

“Yes, sir,” Jerrod nodded. “I never would’ve left if Tillman hadn’t forced me to go with him. He was gonna kill me when we got far enough away from town. I caught him off guard and … well, you’ll see. He’s back in his cell and not feelin’ too good.”

Donner took off his hat and hung it on a wall peg. He looked at his deputy and said, “Well, Myron, looks like we owe Jerrod an apology.”

“We sure do. Both of us assumed you’d plotted the escape with Tillman.”

“Apology accepted,” Jerrod said with a grin. “Can I go now?”

Donner’s gaze swung to Dottie. “He is going to see Dr. Carroll?”

“Yes, Sheriff,” she said. “I had to wire his office and cancel the appointment today, of course, but we’re going first thing in the morning. I’m sure Dr. Carroll will work him into his schedule.”

The last shadows of twilight were on the land as Jerrod and Dottie pulled up in front of the Reeves house. James and Molly Kate were on the front porch with Grandpa Will, who sat in his rocking chair.

Molly Kate was playing with two of her dolls. When she saw that her father was at the reins, she picked her dolls up, placed one under each arm, and moved close to the old man.

Will rose to his feet, laid a hand on her shoulder, and said in a half-whisper, “Don’t be afraid, honey. Your daddy won’t hurt you.”

James also pressed close to the old man. Will laid his other hand on James’s shoulder and squeezed it tight.

Jerrod helped Dottie out of the wagon, and Maudie came out
the door as they were mounting the steps. “Well,” she said with a wide smile, “how did it go with Dr. Carroll?”

Dottie said that Jerrod had not yet seen the doctor, then between the two of them, they explained what had happened. Maudie invited them to stay for supper, but Dottie graciously declined, saying they needed to get on home. There were things Jerrod needed to tend to before morning, and he could do some of it while she was preparing supper.

An hour and a half later, the Harper family sat down to eat. Jerrod could see that his children were afraid, and he spoke calmly to them, telling them that he loved them and that they didn’t need to be afraid of him. Dottie reminded them that their father was going to begin seeing Dr. Carroll, who would help make Jerrod better.

Both children tried to relax. Molly Kate sat on Jerrod’s right, holding a doll in the curve of her left arm while attempting to eat with her right hand. The fear that her father might go into one of his spells at any moment had stolen her appetite. She picked at her food with her fork.

Jerrod noted it and said in a firm voice, “Molly Kate, you’re not eating. Lay your dolly down beside your chair, and sit up and eat your supper. You haven’t even touched your milk.”

Molly Kate’s hands trembled as she lowered her doll to the floor. Then to please her father, she reached for her glass with both hands, as she had been taught to do. But she was shaking so bad, the glass slipped from her fingers and overturned.

Dottie jumped up and rushed to the cupboard for a cloth. James’s eyes were fixed on his father, whose face went suddenly red. Jerrod shoved his chair back and stood, glowering at the terrified child.

“Molly Kate, why can’t you be more careful?” Even as he
spoke, he backhanded her across the face, knocking her off the chair.

James left his chair and backed up until he ran into the wall. Dottie dashed to her daughter and picked her up. Molly Kate was dazed and glassy-eyed. Dottie held the child close and glared at Jerrod, who was moving toward her.

“Jerrod!” she screamed. “Stop!”

“Put her down, Dottie!” he roared. “She spilled her milk! She needs to be punished!”

“Jerrod, no!” Dottie cried, backing away. “She dropped the glass because she was frightened of
you!”

Jerrod grabbed his chair and threw it across the room. He started for her.

James ran in front of him, wailing, “No, Daddy! Don’t hurt Mommy!”

Jerrod fixed the boy with wild eyes and knocked him out of the way. James hit the closed pantry door and fell to the floor.

Jerrod bore down on Dottie and raised a hand to strike her.

“Daddy-y!” Molly Kate screamed.

The high-pitched little voice stopped Jerrod short. He blinked and looked at the hand poised to strike. Then he turned and bent over the table and wept.

Dottie put Molly Kate down and helped James to his feet. “Go up to your room, children,” she said above the sound of Jerrod’s weeping.

“But, Mommy,” argued Molly Kate, “Daddy might hurt you!”

“No, honey. He’s the real daddy again. He won’t hurt me. Go on now, both of you.”

When the children were out of the room, Dottie went to Jerrod, put an arm around him, and said, “Here, honey. Sit down.”

Jerrod slumped sideways onto James’s chair and wrapped his arms around his wife. Dottie stood there, holding his head in her arms. He sobbed over and over that he was sorry, begging Dottie to forgive him. When his sobs had subsided, she stroked his hair and said, “I love you, Jerrod.”

“I don’t deserve you, Dottie,” he said, his voice breaking. “I don’t deserve those wonderful children. Oh, why doesn’t God just kill me!”

“Sh-h-h,” she said, laying her head down against his. “You can’t help it, darling. That old war did this to you. Dr. Carroll will help you. I just know he will.”

The next morning, James and Molly Kate were once again with the Reeveses as Jerrod and Dottie pulled up in front of Dr. Matthew Carroll’s office in San Francisco.

Jerrod slid from the wagon seat and hurried around to the other side to help Dottie down. Holding hands, they stepped onto the boardwalk and approached the door of Dr. Carroll’s office.

Suddenly Jerrod froze.

Dottie looked up at him with concern in her eyes. “What’s the matter?”

“I can’t go in there!”

“Jerrod, you
must!
You’ve got to have Dr. Carroll’s help.”

“No, Dottie! He’ll put me in the asylum. I know it! That jail
was bad enough, but there’s no way I could stand bein’ caged in the asylum!”

Desperate and frightened, Dottie gripped both his arms as hard as she could. “Jerrod, listen to me! He’s not going to put you in the asylum! Remember what you did last night? Do you remember what you did to your children?”

When he didn’t answer, she shook him. “Jerrod, are you listening to me?”

He licked his lips and met her gaze. “Yes. Yes, I … I’m listenin’.”

“Jerrod, if you won’t let Dr. Carroll help you, I have no choice. I’ll have to take James and Molly Kate and leave you. Those children have suffered enough! I cannot … I
will
not let them go through another episode like last night’s! Do you hear me? I must protect my children! If you don’t go in there right now, I’m taking them and leaving!”

Jerrod grabbed Dottie by the hair, yanked her head back, and yelled, “You try to take the kids and leave,
I’ll kill you, Dottie!
Do you hear me? I’ll kill you!”

Passersby stood and stared. Someone spotted a police officer crossing the intersection on horseback at the end of the block and called to him.

Suddenly the earth trembled. The boardwalk began to undulate, and Jerrod and Dottie grabbed hold of each other to keep from falling. By the time the police officer skidded his horse to a halt, the quake was over. As he dismounted, people pointed at the couple and told him the man had just manhandled the woman and threatened to kill her.

The policeman moved up quickly, pulling his night stick from his belt. He scowled at Jerrod and snapped, “Let go of her, mister!”

“Officer, this man is my husband,” Dottie said. “He’s having some emotional problems, and I’m taking him in here to see Dr. Carroll. He got a little upset, but he’s calmed down now. May we go on in?”

The policeman eyed Jerrod sternly and said, “You going in to see the doctor?”

“Yes, officer,” Jerrod said, wiping sweat from his face.

“Okay, I’ll just go in with you.”

As the Harpers moved inside the building, Jerrod looked down at Dottie and said with a quaver in his voice, “I’m sorry, Dottie. I didn’t mean it when I said I’d kill you and the kids.”

Dottie squeezed his hand and said, “I know you didn’t.”

Flora Downing greeted Dottie and told her the doctor was just finishing with a patient. He would be able to see them in a few moments. While they waited, Dottie explained the presence of the officer to the receptionist, telling her what had happened on the street. They talked for awhile about the brief quake, and soon the patient came out of Dr. Carroll’s office. Flora went in and told Dr. Carroll the Harpers were there and why the police officer was with them.

Dr. Carroll came out with Flora and smiled at Dottie, then extended his hand to Jerrod. The big man shook hands with the doctor, but his nervousness was showing. Dr. Carroll said Flora had told him of the incident on the street, and he thanked the policeman for his presence.

“Mrs. Harper,” Dr. Carroll said, “before I sit down with Jerrod, I’d like to talk to you alone for a few minutes.”

Fearful Jerrod would bristle at that, Dottie looked at him and said, “It’s all for your good, darling.”

“Yes, I can assure you of that,” Dr. Carroll said.

“I understand,” Jerrod said. “I’ll wait right here.”

“And so will I,” the officer said.

“After the way I acted out there on the street, I can’t blame you,” Jerrod said. “Don’t worry, Dottie. I won’t give him any trouble.”

D
R
. M
ATTHEW
C
ARROLL
leaned on his elbows and looked at Dottie Harper as she sat in front of his desk and worked some more to get her hair back into place. Again his heart went out to her. She was such a sweet and lovely woman. She didn’t deserve the kind of treatment she had been subject to, being married to Jerrod Harper.

“All right,” he said. “I want you to tell me everything that has happened since we talked last. I need to know in order to better help your husband.”

Dottie spilled it all out, almost breaking down a couple of times.

When she was done, Dr. Carroll sighed, eased back in his chair, and said, “Mrs. Harper, Jerrod has to be locked up.”

“But, Doctor, you said—”

“That was before he threatened to kill you. He’s dangerous.
Very
dangerous. It wouldn’t take much for him to kill you with his bare hands. He’s got to be locked up.”

Tears welled up in Dottie’s eyes. Her lower lip quivered as she said, “Can’t you at least try using the sedatives, do the counseling here in your office so Jerrod can live at home? It would be so
much better for his state of mind. He—”

“No,” Carroll said flatly. “He’s too dangerous.”

“But if the sedatives would do as you thought, I’m sure Jerrod won’t be dangerous … and the counseling.”

“Mrs. Harper, I deeply appreciate the magnificent love you have for your husband and your unceasing faithfulness to him. But if Jerrod isn’t placed in the asylum, your faithful heart is going to get you killed.” Dottie stared at him, wiping tears. “Until it’s done, you and the children will not be safe. It’s not only best for the three of you, but it’s best for Jerrod. You must see that.”

Dottie bit down on her lower lip, blinking against the tears in her eyes. She stared at the floor for a long moment, then looked up at the psychiatrist. “I’m terrified, Doctor. I’m afraid of how Jerrod will react when he’s told he must go to the asylum.”

“Well, Officer Felton is out there. The best time to tell him is right now. We’ll have the officer escort us while we walk Jerrod to the asylum.”

Dottie drew a shuddering breath and said, “All right, Doctor. I will go along with you on this … but you’d better be ready to see Jerrod go into one of his spells.”

“I’ll tell Officer Felton to stay near, okay?” Carroll said, rising from his chair.

“I’m not sure he’ll be enough.”

“Well, I’m here, too. Certainly between the two of us we can handle him.”

The doctor opened the door and stepped into the outer office. There were no other patients present. Flora was at her desk, and the two men sat opposite each other in the waiting area.

Jerrod rose to his feet. “You ready for me now, Doctor?”

“Yes, please come in.”

The doctor let Jerrod move past him and told him to sit next to Dottie. Pulling the door shut, he whispered to Felton, “Stay close, will you? I may need you.” The officer nodded.

Carroll left the door open about an inch and returned to his desk and sat down. Before he could say anything, Dottie laid a hand on Jerrod’s arm and said, “Honey, I’ve told Dr. Carroll everything that’s happened since he and I last talked … and we’ve come to a conclusion as to what’s best for you and for the children and me.” She paused. “That is what you want, isn’t it? What’s best for all of us?”