Everything I've Never Had (15 page)

“Celeste, do you understand that what he did was assault? Sexual assault? Do you understand that he has no right to touch you like that? I understand that things get overlooked in this family. Chalked up to strong personalities and an overwhelming passion. But this will not be swept under the rug. You will not be forced to pretend this didn’t happen.”

If he only knew the whole ugly truth of the matter, I’d never be able to talk him out of gaining revenge against William. Placing both my hands on his cheeks, I beg, “Please don’t do anything. I’ve handled it. He’s not going to mess with me again. Tripp would’ve let me handle this the way I wanted.”

“Newsflash, I’m not Tripp. Never wanted to be but in one aspect. We are very different people.”

I thought the Tripp comment would win him over. He admired him so much. But I should’ve known better. Adrian is a strong-willed person and, like he’d just reminded me, he didn’t do politics. Last ditch effort, I try, “As a favor to me, will you please leave it alone? I don’t want everyone to know about it. I would be humiliated.”

He stares at me and I can see the battle raging in him. “Shit!” he roars and I know I’ve won. I relax and think to offer him gratitude when I hear the barn door being jostled open. They’re back. Adrian moves away from me, and I move in front of him.

It’s all of them—my father, my father-law-in, my brothers, Tripp’s brothers, and Bradford. It looks as though the kids have already gone in, and I thank God for that little blessing. Now, get me through these next few minutes as I try to get us all out of here without it all going to hell.

Louis breaks the awkward silence that has ensued by finding Adrian and me alone together. His brow is furrowed as he strides forth to stand in front of me. “What’s going on here? Celeste, are you all right?”

I guess the tension was that thick because even Louis could feel it and he’d just arrived. I open my mouth to assure him and everyone else that everything was fine, but William beats me to the punch. “She told you,” he states. “Unbelievable. You won’t be happy until everyone hates me, will you?” He sneers the last comment at me and my eyes meet his. Unfortunately, his are trained on Adrian’s and I turn to take him in. Remember what I said about those expressive eyes? Well, they’re trained on William and William should be the pile of ash now. “I’m curious to see how you’ve twisted the story to make yourself seem like the victim?”

“Told him what?” Louis asks me.

He beats me to the punch again, and his words ignite a fire of indignation in me. “She told him that we fooled around. That things got a little out of hand. No worries, she put me in my place.” He walks around our fathers and stands behind Louis. “I don’t see how it’s any of your business what happens between me and Celeste anyway, Adrian. I’m pretty sure you agreed to—”

“That’s enough,” Adrian barks and I can feel his anger radiating out from his chest and into my back as he moves closer to me. “And ‘what happened between you two’ comes nowhere near describing what you did to her.”

Louis spins to face William. “What did you do to her?”

“Nothing she didn’t like at first. I can’t help it if her regrets cause her to view things a little differently after the fact.”

Adrian’s chest bumps my back with every word he fires at William. “You ass. You forced yourself on her. You fucking sicken me. You always have, but this goes beyond anything I’ve ever thought you capable of. And beyond forgiveness. You’ve pulled that shit for the last time, cousin.”

William raises his eyebrows at Adrian and his eyes widen in disbelief. The four of us have ended up practically on top of one another. My eyes shoot to my father’s, imploring him to stop this, but he just stands there, transfixed by what is happening before him. I allow my eyes to drift over all the other male counterparts, and they’re all staring at me as though I’m the one causing all this drama and they’d like nothing more than to squash it— and me—out. When my eyes meet Bradford’s, I see tenderness and questions. I’m pulled from looking at them with William’s next words. “It wasn’t the first time she begged for it, cousin. And I can assure you it won’t be the last.”

I barely let out a gasp as a fist slams into William’s face. It’s not the fist I’d expected, though. It’s Louis’s and he’s not stopping there. “Is that where you got your busted lip from, William?” Louis bellows as his next blow glances off of William’s chin. “You’re sick, man. I happen to know Celeste doesn’t want shit to do with you! You attacked her and you’re gonna pay.” Louis has William backed into a stall and is pummeling him before anyone can get to him and pull him off. The sickening thud of fist on face actually thrills me. The fact that William is getting the shit kicked out of him actually makes up for the mortification I was feeling about everyone knowing everything now.

Adrian darts around me to pull Louis off of a slumping William. “He’s good, brother. Ya did good,” he congratulates him and pounds Louis on the back as he turns him and guides him out of the stall. When Louis reaches me, my eyes fill with tears and I throw myself at him.

“Thank you,” I whisper. “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.”

Louis is breathing hard and he squeezes me tight as he assures me, “You didn’t do anything wrong, baby girl. That’s all on him. You’re going to put that behind you. You’ll be stronger for it.” He stops abruptly and leans back and narrows his eyes at me. “And you’re gonna tell me if he or anyone else ever tries that shit again. I know you’re my big sister, but it’s my job to look out for you.”

“Louis,” I whisper as I wipe a little of William’s blood from his cheek.

“What is going on in here? Everyone can hear you all.” My mother’s shrill voice cuts through our tender moment. The brothers Hebert are helping William out of the stall as my mother takes him in. “William, what happened to you?”

“I had to teach William some manners, Mother. It seems he didn’t know how to keep his hands to himself where Celeste was concerned.”

My mother’s eyes, currently shooting darts out of them, cut to me. “You told them. After all this time. You TOLD them,” she accuses.

“No, Mother,” I try.

But my father finally intervenes, “Everyone out! Now! Essential parties only.” Most everyone moves to leave. I feel Adrian close in on me again. “Adrian, you too. This doesn’t concern you.”

“Everything about her concerns me,” he replies with quiet firmness. I thrill at his little declaration and I give him a little smile that, I hope, conveys my gratitude.

My eyes shoot an apology over to Bradford as he turns to leave. He gives me a lingering look before his eyes glance over to Adrian and then back to me. I try for a tentative smile before focusing my attention back to the involved parties. After most everyone has exited, my father takes control of the situation, “How do you know about this, Claire?” my father demands.

“They were very young,” she starts, “I told her that it was just normal teenage hormones and not to be alone with him for a while. Leave it to Celeste to dredge up old misunderstandings in a most melodramatic fashion.” Her cold resolve makes me shiver. She didn’t care then and she doesn’t care now. As that reality slaps me in the face yet again, I shake my head, dazed.

“What are you talking about, Claire? This incident just transpired.”

Finally, my mother looks shaken, but only because she’s just discovered that she’s ratted herself out. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

I move from Louis’s embrace and Adrian’s quiet support to stand before her. “They’re talking about the fact that William attacked me again, Mother. He forced me to get him off,” I spew, taking great pleasure in being so vulgar in her presence, “when I was twelve years old and he tried it again a few days ago. He didn’t get so lucky this time,” I sneer.

My father’s steely voice slices the thick air in two. “You little bastard,” he says to William. “And how dare you, woman? How dare you keep this from me and force our daughter to keep that secret.”

“That’s not exactly—” William tries but one look from Louis has him cowering where he stands.

“Don’t speak to me like that,” my mother says. “You know what I’ve endured for the sake of this family. And it’s quite sanctimonious of you to pretend otherwise.” Wow! I was really impressed with my mother for standing up to my father. He was one of the most intimidating men I knew. She must have something really good on him because he doesn’t say any more.

Chip finally intervenes by telling William that he should leave and keep his distance for a while.
How about forever!
William storms out but not before kicking the recently rearranged barn tools to the ground. His brother and father follow him out.

My father moves to stand in front of me. He places his hands on my upper arms and pulls me to him slightly. I get lost in his expression for a moment, mesmerized by the look of regret and compassion that I’m fairly certain I’ve never seen from him before. “Please know that we will deal with William. He will not hurt you again, and you won’t be forced to further endure his presence. Do you understand?”

“Yes, Daddy,” I murmur, grateful, but is this really what it took for him to finally get it? “Thank you for supporting me.” It feels awkward to thank him for something that he should have done, but honestly, I was that surprised that he had sided with me. He just gives me a nod and leaves me with Louis and Adrian.

Louis pulls me to his side and kisses the top of my head, rubbing his hand up and down my arm in silent support before he follows the rest of them.

I’m afraid to look at Adrian. He knows the whole ugly truth. Will he see me as a damaged, defiled woman? One he has to tiptoe around and coddle? That would kill me. I like how unpredictable and unruly he is with me. Nothing needs to change between us.
Wait! All that needs to change between us. Back to just friends. And not this twisted back and forth. Friends only! That’s the plan, right?
I groan with frustration, and I hear him chuckle behind me. Yeah, I was totally lost in my own head for a minute there.

Spinning around, I take him in. All confidence, leaning against the barn wall with his arms folded and one leg kicked out over the other. I swallow hard as his pure, overwhelming masculinity hits me all at once. Faded jeans, scuffed up cowboy boots, faded navy, button-down Oxford with folded sleeves, disheveled dark brown hair, those unbelievably brilliant blue eyes…
How am I ever not supposed to want him?

Shaking my head slowly at my dilemma, I remark, “I can’t believe you can find any humor whatsoever in this situation.” I try to mask my grin, but I just can’t because he’s so freaking adorable with his smug smile and his laugh lines.

“You’re right. Nothing about that situation was funny, but I know what you’re thinking, and that’s damn laughable.”

I quirk my brow at him. “Really? You know what I’m thinking, do you?”

“Yep, you’re wondering if I’m going to hold this whole mess against you. Think about you differently. Treat you differently.”

Damn! He’s good.
Well, pretty good. He’s missed all my wayward thoughts about how irresistible he is. His comments sober me up a bit, and I nod my head at him seriously.

“Celeste, I didn’t think it was possible, but I admire you more than ever—your tenacity, your strength, your independence.” He pauses for a second and runs his hand over his stubble for a second before continuing. “I had a friend in college who experienced something similar. It was date rape, though. And it happened to be someone I’d considered a friend who assaulted her. Anyway, I knew something was wrong and had to pull it out of her and convince her to do something about it. Not to make light of what happened to you, but she wasn’t able to fend him off, so it went way further for her and she didn’t deal with it well. But the one thing she worried about more than anything else—looking weak and being embarrassed in front of everyone.” He runs his hand through his hair, seeming to try to shake off his bad memory. “Anyway, we didn’t need to attack William. You’d taken care of him all on your own. I’m just happy we were able to do it. The one thing that pisses me off, other than the fact that it happened, was that you didn’t confide in anyone.”

My heart aches for his friend and rejoices at his kindness. “I’m so sorry about your friend. In many ways, I was fortunate that he didn’t take it farther. And, well, I did confide in someone—my mother—when I was a child, and she told me that it was a woman’s duty to see beyond male weakness.”

He blinks rapidly and leans his ear toward me as if he’d misheard me. “Excuse me?”

“Yes, could you imagine being a twelve-year-old child and being given that little gem of advice when someone has held you down and used you in that way?” My voice falters a little as I remember feeling so disgusting and so used and so distraught, yet my mother brushed it off like it was inconsequential.

My eyes had drifted closed, but they spring open with his gruff command. “Why are you still standing way over there? Come here,” he orders. My feet move without any prompting from my brain. I don’t stop until I’m completely enfolded by his warm, strong embrace. The few tears that escape are dried by the heat seeping through his shirt. After a few minutes, he releases his hold on me.

“Jesus, that woman is a piece of work. I’d always known she was…cold. But that’s just heartless. I’m sorry, Celeste.”

“Me too. But I think it actually feels good to have it out in the open. Maybe Chip and my father will quit with their interest in me and William becoming a couple.”

“Yeah, that’s definitely gonna happen. Don’t you worry about that, OK?”

My brow furrows a little at his reassurance because I don’t see how he can really stop it. My appreciation for him grows with his promise, however. “All right.”

“I don’t want to give you anything else to worry over, but we should probably discuss this now. Does Archer know the details of what happened?”

I blow out a relieved breath. “No, he only knows that William scared me and caused me to run into the table. Oh, and that I yelled at William in our front yard.”

“Thank God for small blessings, right?”