Dying Dreams (Book 1 of Dying Dreams Trilogy) (19 page)

“And end up being his live-in best friend, like you?” She didn’t even try to hide her sneer.

Liza could have been offended but she wasn’t. She knew where she stood with Ellison and she understood why they hadn’t worked. It wasn’t a sore point, and Marcy couldn’t hurt her that way. “Ellison never felt for me one-tenth of what he feels for you.”

Marcy slumped. “I’m sorry. It’s just not so easy for me. The last time I got serious about a guy, he treated me like shit. I’m a little gun-shy.”

“You?” Liza couldn’t believe the tough, take-no-shit Marcy could have ever been mistreated by anyone.

“It was a long time ago. I was young and stupid and he… He wasn’t anything like Ellison, but he… The way he acted, in the beginning, he…”

“He asked you to move in right away?”

Marcy nodded and tears overflowed her eyes and ran down her cheeks. It may have happened a long time ago, but for her the wounds were still fresh. “He was so charming and he’d show up and surprise me with flowers when I least expected it. He called me ten times a day. He took me out every night. He was the first guy who’d ever shown me so much attention and I fell for it. So, when he asked me to move in with him, after only a few months of dating, I did. I was in college and he was older, with his own place, so I moved in, and… Everything was great for a while, but slowly things started to change. He asked me to stop going out with my friends and, if I insisted, he’d accuse me of sleeping with one of them. After a while, I got tired of fighting and I just stopped seeing anyone but him. He even gave me a hard time about going to class if it was in the evening. He’d accuse me of meeting up with some guy, and he’d yell and get so angry. Then, he…”

“He hit you,” Liza guessed.

“No.” She bit her lower lip. “He never laid a hand on me. He never hurt me. He was just insecure and jealous and he… Anyway, he started yelling at me every day about one thing or another and I… I argued with him at first, but then I started to believe he was right. I really wasn’t a good girlfriend, I really couldn’t do anything right. I started walking around on eggshells, being so, so careful not to make him mad, but it never worked. He always got mad anyway.”

“How’d you get out?”

She shrugged. “I had a really good friend, and she saw what was going on. She confronted him and she packed up all of my stuff and moved me out.”

“Wow.”

“After I left, he tried to convince me to go back, and he stalked me for a while, but the farther I got away from him, the more I realized I didn’t want to go back, and I stayed away.”

“That’s terrifying.”

Marcy nodded. “I still have nightmares sometimes. It probably sounds silly to you, but it’s made it really hard for me to trust men. I mean, I guess it’s really that I don’t trust myself, that I’ll attract the same kind of guy with the same kind of insecurities.”

“He didn’t have insecurities, Marc, he was abusive.”

“No, he’d had a tough life and he was insecure and a little–”

“Mean. He was mean as a snake and he abused you, Marcy. Most guys, 99.9% of guys aren’t like that, sweetie. Ellison is not like that.”

Marcy sniffed and wiped her eyes. “Ellison wasn’t like that with you, but if the problem’s me…”

Liza walked around the table and wrapped her arms around her friend. “You aren’t the problem, sweetie. That asshole you dated was the problem. Ellison will treat you like an equal. He’ll let you have your own life. If he doesn’t, I’ll kick his ass.” Liza gave Marcy one more tight squeeze and returned to her seat. “You should tell him what you told me and you shouldn’t move in with him until you’re ready.”

“You think he’ll be okay with that?”

Liza tried not to let her eyes show how crazy she thought Marcy sounded. “Yes, Marcy, he’ll be okay with that. He’s a good guy.”

She nodded, but she didn’t look entirely convinced. It was the first time she’d ever seen Marcy anything but calm and confident, and she didn’t like it. Unfortunately, she’d told Reynolds she’d be in the office at one, which was only fifteen minutes in the future, so she couldn’t stay and make sure Marcy was going to be okay. Liza gave her three more hugs before she left, and Marcy seemed fine. Still, Liza couldn’t help worrying. She needed to make sure she was there for Marcy and for Ellison. Liza would not be like her mother and get so involved with a guy that she forgot all about her friends.

After three hours of physical and mental tests at SPA, Liza found herself on the evening street without anything to do, but think of Sloane and how much she wanted to tell him about her day and how hard every test had been for her. She considered herself to be in good shape, but fifty push-ups hadn’t come easy, and she was pretty sure she’d failed miserably. Her next thought was to talk to Ellison, and she dialed him as she walked.

“Hey, Li. How’s it going?”

“I’m tired. Can I come over there and hang out for a bit?” She hoped the desperation in her voice wasn’t obvious.

“I’d love to hang out with you, but Marcy’s coming over and it seemed like she needed to talk to me alone.”

Liza tried not to, because it was good that Marcy was going to get it all on the table with Ellison, but she couldn’t help feeling a little jealous. Even when Ellison had other girlfriends, Liza had always come first with him. “You should talk to her then. We can hang out some other time.”

“Great. Oh, by the way, Agent Rice called. He wanted to know if I knew how to get in touch with you. I told him you’d gotten a new phone, but I didn’t feel it was my place to give him your number.”

“Okay, thanks for letting me know.”

“You gonna call him?”

“Why do you care?”

There was a long pause and Liza felt immediately guilty. It wasn’t Ellison’s fault she was in a pissy mood.

“Ooh, somebody’s defensive,” Ellison said, a laugh in his voice. “You really like the guy don’t you?”

“No,” she said, way too quickly.

“Uh-huh, well I think you should call him, sweetheart. He sounded a tiny bit desperate to speak to you. Just short of begging.”

“Well, if he begs, let me know, then maybe I’ll call him.”

“Wait, are you mad at him? Did he hurt you?” Ellison sounded like he was ready to track the guy down and break his nose.

“No, he didn’t hurt me. Quite the opposite, in fact. I just… I can’t talk about this over the phone.”

“Yeah, okay, I’ll let it go. Just don’t do your usual thing, Li, okay? Don’t get scared off by how much you like him.”

Liza hung up the phone and stared at it. She’d never hung up on Ellison before, and she suspected he was laughing at her. Who the hell did he think he was? She didn’t get scared off by anything. She didn’t run from guys because she liked them. She ran from them because they got clingy, just like Sloane, expecting her to call just because he asked. Well, fuck that. She was her own person, and she wasn’t going to let some guy mess up her head or her life.

She went back to Marcy’s place, walked Beauty and fed him and Beast. Then she changed into sweats and a t-shirt and went outside for another walk. She had to get out of the apartment, because she kept picking up her phone and almost calling Sloane. Ellison had texted her Sloane’s number, just in case she didn’t have it. So thoughtful of him. She wanted to dial it, every part of her wanted to dial that number. She just wanted to hear his voice. Just wanted to tell him about her day and hear about his day and thank him for the flowers. And that was exactly why she wasn’t going to call him. She wasn’t going to get sucked down that rabbit hole. She left the phone at the apartment, grabbed her bag and stormed out.

After an hour of walking, she found herself in front of the public library. She went in and looked up everything she could about ocean drilling.

*SLOANE*

Sloane stared at his phone as though he could make it ring using his mind. He couldn’t understand why she hadn’t called. He knew it was crazy, he knew it had only been a day, but something just felt off, like an itchy tag in his shirt, and he knew he’d feel better if he could just hear her voice.

“You got better places to be?” Gabriel Moon asked, his voice calm. Sloane almost dropped the phone. He’d heard that tone before, but never when Moon was addressing him. Usually, when Moon used that tone, somebody died.

“I’m sorry. I’m just a little confused, Moon. It’s not like you to ignore a SPA warning and we’re continuing to get reports of wolf sightings.”

Moon narrowed his eyes and Sloane glared right back. He wasn’t one of Moon’s wolves who had to cower when their alpha displayed his dominance. He had every right to speak his mind and he wasn’t going to apologize for that. Next to him, Fulsom’s breath hitched and the two other agents in the room leaned back in their chairs, but Sloane leaned forward. “If you were paying attention,” Moon said. “You’d know that the problem is that none of my wolves run without my say-so. Either you’ve got a wild wolf problem or your people calling in the sightings are liars.” Everyone in the room was aware of the other option, that rogue wolves had moved into Moon’s territory, but no one dared say it out loud. Suggesting there were interlopers questioned Moon’s authority. Sloane was sure Moon had his own wolves hunting for rogues, but he needed answers to take back to Reynolds.

Sloane knew he should back down, but he needed a distraction. He needed to shake off the bad feeling somehow and there was Moon, ready for a fight. “Or you’ve got a problem you aren’t sharing with us. Just give me something I can take back to my boss so I can get out of here.” And get back to Liza, he thought.

Sloane was pretty sure the other three agents stopped breathing and Moon trembled with barely contained rage. “You think because you aren’t part of my pack I won’t rip you apart for questioning my authority? You think that badge makes you safe here?”

Sloane knew he should be afraid, but all he saw was red. He wanted that fight. He really, really wanted that fight. “I don’t care–”

“He’s bonded.” Fulsom sounded desperate. “He slept with some fae girl and he’s bonded with her and she hasn’t called him.”

Moon sat back down, but the hard anger didn’t leave his face. “A bond hardly excuses the words he spoke here.”

“I think I have every right–”

“She’s not returning his calls,” Fulsom said. “He didn’t even realize they’d bonded, and the girl left his bed before he woke up this morning.”

Moon’s expression softened the tiniest bit. “I never thought I’d see you lose your head over a woman, Rice.” Moon chuckled. “It’s good to see you have a heart in there somewhere.”

“It’s not me, it’s this damn magic.” Sloane couldn’t help but shudder.

Moon laughed loudly and fully. “Ah, I see. You should be grateful for the magic. A bond is a gift and the sex… It is a gift.” Moon steepled his fingers under his chin and studied Sloane. “You should go. Take a few days off and spend them with the girl. Figure out this magic between you two. I’ll tell Reynolds you’re here and so will the other agents.”

Sloane sighed and dropped his head in his hands. He had to get a handle on this or he was going to lose his job. He straightened and took a deep breath. “I’m fine, Moon. I’ll get it together, you can’t send me home over some woman.”

Moon sighed. “Please excuse us, fellows. I need to talk to Agent Rice alone.”

The others filed out and Moon smiled at Sloane and slapped him on the back. He opened a drawer in his desk and pulled out two shot glasses and a bottle of whiskey. He filled both glasses to the rim and handed one to Sloane.

“I can’t drink while I’m on the job.”

“Oh, you’ll drink because we’re celebrating. It’s clear that whoever told you about the bond, didn’t tell you everything, and I’m going to fill you in on what you’re missing.”

*LIZA*

Liza dreamed she was at a party, dancing to some sort of tribal music with pounding drums. The pounding got louder and more insistent, until she couldn’t keep up with it any more. She stopped dancing and slowly climbed out of the dream to realize the pounding was on her door. She pushed off the covers and pulled on the plaid pajama bottoms that she’d dropped on the floor when she’d gone to bed. She was wearing an old, holey t-shirt, but she didn’t own a robe and the t-shirt covered enough to be decent. Her heart pounded as she walked to the door. A knock in the middle of the night was either a serial killer or someone with very bad news.

She peeped through the peephole and saw Sloane, his expression so pained it made her chest ache. She knew if she opened the door, she’d wrap her arms around him and do anything to make that pain go away and she couldn’t afford to lose herself in him. She just couldn’t.

“What do you want?” she shouted through the door.

She hadn’t thought Sloane’s frown could get any more severe, until it did. “We need to talk. Apparently, I’m the last person you want to see, but you need to hear what I have to say.”

“Can you say it through the door?”

“I would have said it over the phone, but you won’t call me.”

Liza sighed. It was only a matter of time before Marcy’s neighbors got angry enough to complain and she didn’t want to get Marcy evicted, too. She unlocked the door and opened it, then ran back to the couch and got under the covers, before he stepped in and closed the door behind him. He squinted in the darkness. “Um, do you think we could turn on a light?”

“There’s a candle and matches on the table next to the door.”

Sloane lit the candle, walked over to the couch with it and put it down on the coffee table, illuminating her face. He looked at her and, for a moment, something like peace washed over him. His expression lightened and he almost smiled. Then he seemed to remember where he was and he sat down in the armchair several feet from the end of the couch. “Ellison said you got evicted. I’m sorry about that.”

“It’s not your fault.”

Sloane accepted that with a nod. “I tried to get in touch with you today.”

Liza suddenly found her hands fascinating. “Yeah, Ellison told me. I’ve been really busy today and I just… um… I forgot to call you back.”