Authors: Leigh Talbert Moore
“What I told you—going to New Orleans, meeting with Tulane officials, touring the campus. Then William started asking questions about what we were doing now. Lucy talks a lot when she’s nervous, and he makes her very nervous.” Jack laced our fingers together and stroked the inside of my forearm.
“But why would your brother care about me?” My voice sounded too desperate, but it was hard to hide my feelings. “Other than to note our differences, I mean.”
“We’re not so different,” he smiled. “My family’s just been here longer. Your dad’s in development, right?”
“Sort of. He’s a contractor.”
“Well, suppose you guys had lived here fifteen years ago, and he’d been one of the men on the golf course. We could be neighbors.”
“But would you notice the girl next door? You seem to prefer going outside the box.”
“Would the girl next door have such cute curls or cry at the end of
Song of Solomon
or want to learn to sail with me?”
“Yes.”
“Then you bet I’d notice her.”
I pressed my cheek against his shoulder still worried. He smiled and gently lifted my chin and kissed me. It was a soft kiss, then a little nibble, a little touch of his tongue. As always, my whole body lit right up, but my chest was tight. It was hard to breathe. He pulled me around so I was facing him, my back toward his knees, and slid the band out of my hair, spreading out my curls.
“What are you doing?” I tried to fight him and pull them back into a knot.
“I love these.” He grabbed one lock that had managed to hold together in a large spiral and pulled it around in front of my face.
“Well, too bad there aren’t more of those. The rest are just fuzz,” I tied my hair back again. “So you didn’t tell me what William meant by ‘where you belong’? Why is he here?”
“He’s trying to convince Dad we should graduate mid-year. Start college in the spring.”
My heart slammed to the ground, and I knew he could see the look on my face, even in this light.
“He won’t do it?” I whispered.
“I don’t know. William makes a good point that we’re really just wasting time now. We’ve got the credits. There’s no reason to wait.”
“But what about Lucy? I’m sure she doesn’t want to leave so soon.”
“That’s where you come in. She panicked. It seems your artist-friend made a real impression on her, and she flipped out at dinner going on about how she couldn’t leave Julian. Said I wouldn’t want to leave you. Threw us right under the bus.”
“What did you say?” I asked quietly.
“I didn’t say anything. Lucy’s not smart enough to know the best way to handle those two is to tell them as little as possible. Of course, Will had to take a few days off to come home and see what’s going on here.”
“What’s his problem?”
“He’s worried about our future, meaning me. Says we should be moving into the Gulf market, making more investments in South America, the Caribbean. He’s ready for me to get in the business now, and if he has to wait another year, he’s afraid there won’t be any prime real estate left. It’s already disappearing fast.”
“Is that even safe? I mean, hurricanes regularly wipe everything out, and with global warming and all, won’t it just happen again?”
“Listen to you,” Jack chuckled. “What do you know about these things?”
“I hear my dad talking.”
“That was a concern immediately after the last big storm, but now it’s been several years and things are getting back to normal.”
“So you’ll start working with him in college?” I frowned, but it made sense. “I guess I can understand why your brother wants you with him.”
“Will’s just greedy. Dad’s made enough good decisions to keep us comfortable for a long time. Leave something for the rest of the world. And get off my back,” Jack’s anger had returned.
“I take it he doesn’t agree with you.”
“He thinks I’m lazy.” It sounded like he was repeating an old argument.
“You’re not lazy. I mean, I guess you are coasting this semester, but you did the work once already. If it weren’t for your concern for Lucy—”
“What do you know about that?” His sudden sharpness made me hesitate.
“Rachel said something about it being Lucy who got expelled, and you dropped out to save her reputation or something.”
“Rachel doesn’t know what she’s talking about.” Jack looked off.
“What did happen?” I asked softly. “I mean, it’s personal. And maybe you don’t know me well enough yet…”
He smiled that gorgeous smile and leaned forward to brush his lips over mine. His breath whispered across my cheek, and my heart skipped a beat. It was so nice when he did that.
“It’s really Lucy’s business,” he said. “So I hope you can keep this to yourself.”
“Of course! I mean, who would I tell?”
“Rachel?”
“Oh, god no. Rachel’s a big mouth. I didn’t even tell her about us. I mean, it was obvious when you started driving me to school and all, but she would’ve been the last person—”
“You would’ve talked to if you’d had someone to talk to about me?”
“Right.” I smiled and slid my fingers under his bangs, smoothing them out of his eyes like I’d always wanted to do.
His voice turned serious as he told me the story. “Well, I told you Lucy likes to find a hero.”
“Right. Although, I think you’re her real hero.”
“She got involved with an older man who took advantage of his position, and she ended up pregnant. He blamed her for the whole thing, said she’d entrapped him, and insisted she have an abortion.”
My brow creased. “Oh, god. Poor Lucy.”
“Dad pulled her out of school and sent her to Sedona, to Gigi, and found an adoptive family for the baby.”
“But why did you go?”
“I got expelled.”
“What?” He said it so casually, I thought I’d misunderstood. “Why?”
“I met the guy in the parking lot one afternoon and beat the shit out of him. Brad and a few of his football buddies helped me. Somebody called the cops, but they took a long time getting there. Played out nicely.”
My mouth dropped open for a moment. Then I closed it. This was new, and I wasn’t sure how to interpret it. “Were you… arrested?”
His lips tightened. “Dad’s lawyer handled it. The bastard decided letting me off was better than getting charged with statutory rape.”
I didn’t answer immediately; more questions were answered. “I guess your dad was pretty angry.”
“I think he was more pissed I might lose my chance at Yale.” Jack looked off again and the tension was back. “I asked to go to Sedona. Lucy was a wreck, and I figured some time with Gigi would be nice. She pretty much raised us.”
“So Lucy never considered… the alternative?”
“What? Abortion? We’re Catholic, Anna. And, well, I don’t think she could’ve gone through with that.”
“Oh, right. Of course not. I didn’t mean she should’ve or anything. It’s just she was so young, and you guys have so much money…” I wasn’t sure how to finish that sentence, so I switched gears. “You’re really sweet to her.”
He seemed to relax. “She gets ignored a lot. She frustrates Dad, and William thinks she’s clueless. But she just wants attention from somebody. It’s been hard for her not having a mom around.”
“Do you remember your mom?”
“Not really,” he smiled. “I mean, we were three when she died. I remember her soft hair and smile, feeling good when I was with her. But that’s about it.”
His words made my chest hurt. “That’s really sad.”
“Yeah, well, it was a long time ago. We never talk about it.”
That statement seemed odd, and I wondered how much of what Tamara said was true. But I decided not to pursue it. He’d told me so much already.
“Will you be at school tomorrow?” I asked.
“No. We’re supposed to meet with the administrators to talk over scheduling. And Dad wants to make the case that my time in Sedona taught me anger management.”
“You warned me your life was complicated,” I sighed. “I guess I didn’t believe you.”
He looked down. “I’ll understand if this is more than you bargained for. We can be friends or—”
“No! That’s not what I want at all!” I threw my arms around his shoulders and hugged him close. “I really wanted to come here tonight. I was worried about you, and… I don’t want you to leave.”
My voice cracked, and tears filled my eyes. I knew the day he left this dream I was having would end, and I could hardly bear the thought.
He exhaled, and I pressed my forehead against his warm neck. Before long his hands moved to my sides, lightly massaging, and I lifted my face searching for his kiss. Our lips met, and when his tongue found mine, that delicious warmth filled my body. He moved me to lying back on the sand and leaned down, kissing me deeper. I slid my hands to his cheeks, trying to hold on as his mouth moved mine open again. My breath quickened, and his kisses traveled to my face and then to my neck.
His hand slipped under my shirt, tracing a burning trail up my stomach. My heart was skipping, but I wasn’t stopping him. All I could think was this might be my last chance, our last time together.
My eyes fluttered open. The sun had almost completely set, and everything was bathed in a deep, orange glow. Jack moved away and in one swift pull, his shirt was over his head and off. My hands spread across his chest, golden and beautiful, with just a few fine hairs scattered across the top. He leaned in again to find my mouth, and I slid my hands down, exploring his warm torso. He groaned and pulled me up, straddling his lap. I could feel where this was headed as he fumbled with the hem of my loose cotton skirt, making his way beneath it to my panties.
Heat was surging through me, and I wanted to follow him. I did. My hands moved to his wrists, hesitantly holding them as his fingers found what they were seeking. But when he touched me, I made a little noise and slid off his lap.
“Hang on,” I gasped, releasing him and then holding my cheeks as my heart tried to settle. “This is just so… well… It’s awfully public.”
Jack lay back on the sand and pressed his palms against his eyes. I could see he was breathing fast, and for a moment, we didn’t speak. I looked down. The tiny ripples of water continued to break on the shore, and I didn’t know what to say. Guilt pressed down on my shoulders. I couldn’t keep pushing him away like this, but inside I was conflicted. I didn’t want to stop, but I wasn’t prepared. All the things he’d just told me were in my mind along with my dad’s cautionary words, and the last thing I wanted was to mess up my plans or prove his stupid dad and brother right.
Finally he exhaled and sat up. “I’m sorry.”
I tried to laugh, but it sounded weak. “No, I’m sorry.” I stood and dusted the sand off my butt. “I need to get ahead of us.” My legs were wobbly, and I wouldn’t dare look into his eyes.
“It’s my fault.” He stood and pulled the tee back over his head.
I reached forward and laced our fingers, pulling him toward the house. “It’s late, and my parents don’t know I’m here. I’d better go.”
We walked back in silence, me trying to find the right words to say, to explain how I was feeling. But nothing was coming. “Your family is pretty screwed up. But you seem okay.”
He laughed. “Appearances can be deceiving.”
We stopped at my car, and I looked up at him. “They’re not so deceiving. In all of it, you’ve just been looking out for your family. That’s good.”
“Maybe,” he looked down. “Look, I knew all the way back at the beginning it was too much—”
“Stop!” That hint of desperation was back. “I meant it when I said it doesn’t matter to me. I mean, it does, but I don’t care about that. I mean… I just… I wasn’t ready. I wasn’t prepared.”
He nodded, but I wasn’t sure he understood. “It’s okay,” he said. “We’ll talk soon.”
A brief hug and he stepped back toward the house. I drove home feeling better and worse than when I’d arrived. I knew so much about him now, and it was wonderful. And terrible. I tried to imagine him being expelled for beating someone, needing anger management. Maybe Dad was right, and I was wrong. Maybe Jack was dangerous.
Things had gotten so complicated so fast. Still, I could never say he didn’t warn me. I sighed. Jack was just so totally hot and sexy and exciting. I was determined to ride this one out. Everything in me felt like I didn’t have a choice. I wanted to be with him and be a part of his life so much. It made me feel exciting, and a little glamorous, too.
Crossing the narrow strip of land that separated his world from mine, the waves seemed agitated as they crashed on the shore. The moon was hidden behind a large mass of clouds, and I could see lightening flicker purple in them every so often. The orange streetlights shone in rippling circles on the black water, and I wondered what I’d be doing right now if Gabi were still here and I hadn’t gone to the beach that day.
I couldn’t even imagine.
Chapter 9
The next week drove me crazy between Jack’s continued silence and my obsessing over what it might mean. I decided to take Julian up on his offer to visit his studio. I’d never made it over while working on the story, and he was always a good distraction.