Contessa (100 page)

“
Oooh, that
’
s right,
”
Lexi says.

“
Your mom was so mad,
”
I add.
“
And she made my dad go and look for you.
”

“
Yeah. Oops,
”
she says, completely nonchalant.

“
So what are y
’
all going to do all night?
”
Lexi asks.

“
There
’
s some party at the hotel.
”

“
Your parents are letting you go to an after party at the hotel?
”
she asks, suspicious.

“
Oh, it
’
s not like that. The parents of the senior class are apparently hosting it.
”

“
Well, that
’
s nice,
”
she says.

“
Whatever!
”
Clara argues, and ignores my warning glare.
“
It sounds lame. I mean, why
’
d we get you these if you
’
re going to be hanging out with parents all night?
”
She waves a container of pills in front of
Lexi and me
.

“
Clara!
”
I yell, grabbing them from her and shoving them back in the back of my drawer.

“
Livvy!
”
Lexi says,
stunned
.
“
Are those...
”

“
No!
”
I lie. Clara ambles over to the bed, sitting down.
“
Yes,
”
I say, feeling guilty,
“
but please, Lexi, don
’
t say anything to my parents, or yours.
”

“
Liv, I won
’
t. But what are you thinking?
”

“
I mean,
”
I start, not wanting to explain this. Originally, I hadn
’
t wanted to talk about it with anyone other than Jon, but I was nervous to go to the doctor alone and I figured Clara wouldn
’
t be judgmental. Plus, with all the secrets I
’
d kept for her over the years, I thought she
’
d be better about keeping mine.

“
You haven
’
t talked to Emi about this?
”

“
No.
”

“
But you tell her everything.
”

“
Well, I wasn
’
t going to tell her
this
.
”

“
Oh. Well, Liv, are you sure you want to do this? Tonight, I mean?
”

“
Yes. Jon and I talked about it. We
’
re ready.
”

“
Okay. But sweetie, it
’
s one of the most important decisions you
’
ll ever make. It
’
s one of the most intimate moments of your life, giving yourself completely to another person. This isn
’
t something you should take lightly.
”

“
I
’
m not!
”

“
And you
’
re sure he
’
s the one you want to give this precious gift to?
”

“
Oh, Lord,
”
Clara starts.

“
Shut up, Clara,
”
we both say to her.

“
Virgins,
”
she mumbles under her breath. I find a pair of socks on my dresser and throw them at her.

“
I
’
m sure he
’
s the one. I love him very much, and I know he loves me, too.
”

“
And prom night? Isn
’
t that a little cliché?
”

“
It
’
s totally cliché,
”
Clara chimes in,
“
but who cares? It
’
s sex!
”
she whispers enthusiastically.

I ignore her and continue addressing my older, more mature cousin.
“
It
’
s an important night to Jon, and to me. I mean, we get to dress up like adults and have a nice dinner like adults, and I have no curfew, like an adult–
”

“
Because your parents trust that you
’
re going to make smart decisions.
”

“
I am, Lex. I
’
m taking the pill–
”

“
It
’
s not guaranteed–
”

“
Will you let me finish? He
’
s going to use protection, too. We
’
ll be extra safe.
”

She looks at me, disappointed.
“
Well, where is he taking you?
”

“
He got a room at the hotel that his prom is being held at.
”
I start looking through the drawer that Clara has made a complete mess of until I find the invitation.
“
The Manhattanite Inn.
”
Internally, I cringe a little. I
’
ve only driven by the place a few times, and there
’
s nothing special about it.

“
The Manhattanite? Livvy, is that good enough for you?
”

“
Lexi, it doesn
’
t matter where, she
’
s in love, and she
’
s ready. Will you stop trying to talk her out of this already?
”

“
I
’
m not, Clara. I just want to make sure she
’
s considering all of her options. When she thinks back on this night, is she going to have any regrets? Will she wish it
were
another man? Another day? Another place? Another time? This should be perfect, Livvy.
”

“
It will be. I
’
ll be with him, and that
’
s all that matters to me. He
’
ll take care of me, no matter where or when this happens. All I
’
ll remember is that it was with him. And I
’
m good with that.
”

“
Hey, girls,
”
my mom says, knocking on my door only after she
’
s opened it. My heart starts to pound in my chest, afraid that she
’
s heard what we
’
re talking about.
“
Oh, Livvy, look at you,
”
she says with a growing smile on her face.
“
You look stunning. Your cousins definitely did a better job than I would have,
”
she admits.

“
Thanks, Mom.
”
I let out a quick breath, relieved that she didn
’
t hear.

“
Jon should be here soon, right?
”

“
I think so, yeah.
”

“
Come show your dad, before he gets here. I think he
’
s got something for you.
”

I start out of my bedroom, followed by my cousins. Clara grabs the small clutch I
’
d left on my dresser and hands it to me.
“
Lipstick. A mirror. Powder. Condoms. You
’
re set,
”
she whispers. I blush hard, and notice Lexi quickly looking away.

“
Dad
’
s in our room,
”
my mother says.
“
I think he wants to talk to you for a minute.
”

“
But if Jon comes–
”
I pause at the base of the stairs to the third floor.

“
We
’
ll entertain him,
”
Clara says.

“
That doesn
’
t comfort me,
”
I tell her sarcastically, clasping tightly to my small purse. I walk slowly up the stairs, taking each step carefully. I knock on the bedroom door, and wait for him to respond before I walk in.
“
Hey, Daddy.
”
I push the door open and take two steps inside. He
’
s struggling with one of his cufflinks.
“
Got somewhere nice to go?
”
I ask.

“
I thought I
’
d take your mom out since Jackson
’
s at Stevie
’
s house. We won
’
t be late, though, should you need to call us for anything. Don
’
t hesitate.
”

“
Dad, I
’
ll be fine.
”

“
Right, you
’
ll–
”
He finally looks up at me, and his eyes grow sad
. “You’ll
be fine. My god, where did my little girl go?
”
he asks.

“
She
’
s right here, Dad. I swear to God, if you make me cry, you
’
ll have Clara to deal with.
”

He laughs aloud, walking toward me.
“
So this is the dress that cost more than my first car, huh?
”

“
It
’
s perfect, though... isn
’
t it?
”

“
It
’
s lovely. You look exquisite, Livvy. I just can
’
t believe how grown up you are.
”
I give him a stern look, silently warning him to not make me get emotional.
“
You know, I
’
ve got half a mind to send a bodyguard with you. With that necklace, too? Let
’
s just say I hope Jon
’
s schoolmates aren
’
t desperate.
”

“
I
’
ll be fine, Dad. No one will even think it
’
s real. They
’
ll assume it
’
s costume jewelry.
”

“
If they have any iota of who you are, they
’
ll know it
’
s real.
”

“
Well, it
’
s safe to say I don
’
t look like the Livvy Holland everyone recognizes. And I know Jon has been discreet about me with his classmates.
”

“
Just promise me you
’
ll be safe tonight.
”
My cheeks burn hot, my guilt obvious. I maintain eye contact, though, to try to counteract my reflexive reaction to his plea.

“
Of course we will.
”
I should have said I. Don
’
t ask me anything, please. Don
’
t.

“
Good. Now, Liv, I think you look beautiful, but something
’
s missing.
”

“
I
’
m not wearing a coat, Dad. It
’
s too warm and this dress is too hot,
”
I tease him.