Changing Forever (36 page)

He looks over to Emery who smiles anxiously. This can’t be easy on her either. I swear I’m seeing some sort of secret language pass between them; I miss having my dad around because he used to do the same exact thing.

When John’s eyes shift to me again, I swallow nervously. It feels like I’m on the edge of a cliff with hands pressed to my back, waiting to see if I’m going to be pushed over, and the silence is just making the feeling worse.

“Do you want coffee?” he asks.

I glance over at Emery whose smile widens. “No, sir, I’m not much of a coffee drinker,” I reply, grinning big.

“The stuff’s not that good for you anyway,” he says, reaching for his cup. Emery gently squeezes my hand, and I know everything is going to be all right. For the first time in a long time, things are where they are supposed to be. Life’s changed for the better.

W
ITH
TWO
WEEKS
LEFT
until my due date, we’re finally settled into our apartment. It’s not much, but it’s close to campus and has two bedrooms to accommodate our growing family.

“Are you ready for your date with Kate?” Drake asks, wrapping his arms around me from behind. He’s been unpacking everything himself the last two days, and I love him for it.

“Yep, I just need to find shoes that still fit on my feet. Does this dress fit okay?”

I spin around and follow his eyes as they take in the long, navy dress I borrowed from Kate. It’s not maternity, but it’s flowy and fits perfectly. “Let’s put it this way … if you don’t leave soon, that dress will be on the floor, and you’ll be under me in bed.”

I smile, taking that as a yes. My cell buzzes. It’s Kate, texting me to let me know she’s here. “I need to go. My ride awaits.”

He cups my face in his hands and kisses me slowly, his lips lingering on mine. He kisses each corner of my lips before pulling away. “Have fun, but hurry back. I already miss you.”

“I’ll miss you, too,” I say, brushing some hair from his forehead.

He grabs my hand, bringing it down to his lips to kiss my palm. “Love you, Em.”

“Love you, too.”

He smiles as I walk past him toward the door. Things have been going really well the last several weeks. After he left my house, we each took a couple weeks to tie up loose ends so we could put our lives back together. After lots of searching, we found this apartment. It wasn’t easy because we could only afford so much, and Drake was picky about the neighborhood. He wanted it to be safe for the baby and me when he wasn’t home. I think we did okay.

I sold my car to get enough money to help with the deposit and first month’s rent. We’re going to have to make do with one car, but Drake and I were raised to make it through with what we have. We’re professional survivors.

When I walk outside, I spot Kate’s little red car sitting in front of the building. She waves and hops out to open my door for me. Everyone’s been treating me like I’m going to break if they don’t baby me. I only have a couple weeks left, though, so I guess I’ll allow it.

“Are you ready?” she asks, climbing back into her seat.

I laugh, feeling the baby against my ribs. “As long as there’s food, you can take me anywhere.”

“So like vegetables and fruit?” she jokes, pulling out onto the street.

“You better be kidding. I need cheese and salsa. Oh, I hope we’re going for Mexican?” I ask, placing my arm over my bulging stomach.

“It’s a surprise … how many of those do you get in life?”

Looking down, I say, “Well, over this last year, I’d say I’ve had my fair share.”

“You’re lucky, though.”

“I know, but it’s weird saying that because I’m pregnant at twenty, living in a small apartment, and I have to work all over again to earn my scholarship. I guess it doesn’t matter what I have or what I’ve accomplished. Happiness was all I needed.”

“I could have told you that,” she says, pulling into the parking lot in front of a salon and spa.

“What are we doing here?”

“Well, since you didn’t have a baby shower, I wanted to do something special for you. I have an appointment for each of us to get a pedicure, and then we’re doing lunch.”

“Seriously, Kate, you didn’t have to do this.”

“I wanted to. You deserve it.” She turns the car off and reaches behind the seat, pulling out a soft green gift bag. “Here.”

“This is too much,” I say, pulling the bag onto my lap. I’ve never had a friend who’s been as good to me as Kate.

“Open it,” she instructs, biting her lower lip.

Reaching inside, I pull out the white tissue paper followed by a soft fleece blanket. It’s a light yellow with green polka dots and has the little ties around the edges. I roll the material
between my fingertips, imagining the little baby growing inside of me lying on top, cooing and kicking. It brings an instant smile to my face but also makes me tear up.

“I made it,” she says quietly. “I know it’s not much.”

“I love it. Really.” I drop the blanket back into the bag and pull my best friend into a hug. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” she whispers, squeezing me back. When she pulls away, she reaches in the back and pulls out another small yellow bag. “Rachel wanted to be here, but she couldn’t because of what happened with Cory. She told me to give you this.”

My life hasn’t been perfect, but I couldn’t imagine what it would be like to be in Rachel’s shoes right now. I went to the Cory’s funeral, but I haven’t seen her since. Pulling the small bag open, I find a Target gift card with a cute little note in Rachel’s handwriting. “Buy what you need. Love, Rachel.”

“Did you talk to her?” I ask, tucking it back into the bag.

“I did the other day when she called to make sure I got this. She’s a mess. It doesn’t sound like she’s coming back this semester.”

“I wish there was something we could do.” I run my fingers along the top of the gift bag, trying to imagine what Rachel’s going through. In all honesty, I think it would be very hard to move on … impossible really.

“She just needs time. I told her to call if she wants to come visit, but I think it’s going to be a while before she’s ready.”

“That’s totally understandable. It just sucks.”

She grabs her purse from the backseat and places her hand over the doorknob. “Are you ready to be pampered?”

Smiling, I say, “I don’t know. This is a first for me.”

“Well, let’s show you what you’ve been missing, and when we’re done, I’ll get you some chips and enchiladas.”

“Have I ever told you you’re my best friend?”

“Every day, but I don’t mind hearing it.”

By the time I step back into my apartment, I’m exhausted. After we finished our pedicures, we each had a plate
full of enchiladas, and then went to Target to buy a few necessities with the gift card Rachel gave me. It was fun to relax and hang out, but I’m ready to lie in bed with my feet up.

I notice that the only light on is the small lamp next to the couch, and Drake is nowhere in sight. Usually, he’d be at the door waiting for me. He’s not in the kitchen either, so I look down the small hallway that leads to the bedrooms, and notice a light peeking out from underneath the nursery door. We haven’t done much with it yet, but we plan to start tomorrow.

I slip my sandals off and follow the light. “Drake,” I yell as I push the door open.

I cover my mouth with my hands, taking in everything. When I left earlier, the room was a blank slate, white walls and tan carpet. Now, there are little characters on the walls from my favorite Dr. Seuss books, as well as a crib, changing table, and rocker. The giant frog Drake had given me a while back rests against the corner of the crib. A perfect touch, a symbol of the start of our new life.

Tears well in my eyes, and I feel Drake’s arms wrapping around me. “Do you like it? I did what I could since we don’t know if the baby’s a boy or girl.”

I nod, still too in shock to put anything into words. I recognize the crib as the same one from all my baby pictures. The changing table looks new, but the wooden rocker was also mine. The curtains and bedding are a light green, yellow, brown and orange with hints of cream. It’s beautiful … more than I could have ever imagined.

“Em,” Drake whispers against my ear. “When I said I wanted you and the baby to have everything, I meant it. I love you.”

His hands move in circles along my stomach as the trail of tears start to fall. “It’s perfect. I couldn’t have done it better.”

“I was afraid you’d be mad because I did it without you, but I wanted to surprise you. I called your dad, and he helped me pull it all together.” He kisses the top of my head, squeezing me tightly again.

“I have pictures of my mom and me in that rocker. I didn’t realize that Dad still had it.”

“It looks like he kept everything up in your attic. He even brought you baptism outfit in case it’s a girl, as well as some of your old toys. I think he had fun helping.”

“Is he still here?”

“No, he left an hour ago. He wanted this moment to be ours.”
Over these last several months, I’ve realized how much my dad loves me. He did the best he could with me when I was growing up, and I think he’ll make a fantastic grandpa.

Turning in Drake’s arms, I wrap my arms around his neck, pressing my lips to his collarbone. He holds me so tight, I swear he’s never going to let me go. “I love you, Chambers.”

“And every day I’m grateful for that because I love you so damn much, Em.”

After kissing a trail up his neck, I look up into his blue eyes, remembering the first day I ran into him. It’s weird how life gets us from one point to another. “Do you remember when you said you were going to marry me someday when I’m ready?”

He nods, watching my curiously.

“I’m ready. I don’t ever want to think about not being with you.”

His eyes widen, and he leans in to kiss my forehead. “I’ll be right back,” he says, running out of the room.

While I wait for him, I look around the room some more. He put a bookshelf in the corner beside the rocking chair, and it’s full of all of my favorite childhood books. Reading is important to me, and Drake knows it. I look forward to reading to our baby every night before bed. It was one of my favorite things to do with my mom.

When I turn back around, Drakes is in front of me on one knee. For the second time today, my hands cover my face. I’ve seen him like this before, but this time I’m ready.

“Emery,” he says, emotion pouring from his voice. “There are two versions of forever: the one I dreamed of every day as a kid, and the one I made my own after the old dreams faded away. The old dreams weren’t meant to be, but this one is. You’re my forever. I just had to take a few wrong turns to find you, and now that I have, I never want to live without you. Will you marry me?”

His hand shakes as he holds up a small black box with a small round solitaire inside. It’s simple, but perfect. The same way I like my life.

I nod, kneeling down to get closer. “You changed my idea of perfect, and this version makes me happy. I can’t imagine ever going to bed without you by my side, or waking up and not seeing your face.”

His trembling fingers pull the ring from the box. He uses one hand to hold mine, and the other to place the ring on my finger. “I love you,” he says, pulling me into his arms.