Authors: Cassandra Clare
“How do they know about the baby?”
Alastair's eyes darted away from hersâhis tell, the small sign that he was lying, which he had displayed since he was a small child. “I don't know. Someone must have told them.”
Cordelia could not speak. It was all she had wanted, for so long. Free her father, save her family. It had been her mantra, the words she had chanted over and over to herself as she fell asleep at night. Now she did not know how she felt.
“Alastair,” she whispered, “the reason I went to the Silent City
with Matthew and James was to talk to Cousin Jem. I know
Mâmân
wanted Father to go to the Basilias as a patient. I thought perhaps if we told the Clave of his sicknessâand it is a sicknessâthey might let him be treated there instead of imprisoned.”
“Ah, by the Angel, Cordelia.” Alastair covered his eyes with his hands for a long moment. When he dropped them, his dark eyes were troubled. “You would have been all right with that? With everyone knowing about his drinking?”
“As I said to you before, Alastair. It is not our shame. It is his.”
Alastair sighed. “I don't know. Father always refused to go to the Basilias. He said he disliked the Silent Brothers, but I think he was always worried they would see through him to the truth. I imagine that is why he always kept Cousin Jem away from our family.” He took a deep breath. “If what you want is for him to go to the Basilias, you should write to him and tell him so. You were the last of the family who did not know his secret. That you do now might well make a difference.”
Cordelia set her hairbrush down, relief coursing through her at last. “That is a good idea. Alastairâ”
“Are you happy, Layla?” he said. He pointed to the Herondale ring on her hand. “I know that is what you wanted.”
“I thought you might be angry,” she said. “You were so furious with James when you thought he was trying to compromise me.”
“I did not think at the time that he would be willing to marry you,” Alastair said apologetically. “But he has stood up and claimed you in front of the world. That is a gesture that is meaningful. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.”
She almost wanted to tell Alastair the truthâthat James was sacrificing more than he guessedâbut she could not, any more than she could tell her mother. He would be angry; Sona would be crushed. “I have what I wanted,” she said, unable to bring herself to say that she was happy, “but what of you, Alastair? What of your happiness?”
He glanced down at his hands. When he looked back up at her, his smile was crooked. “Love is complicated,” he said. “Isn't it?”
“I know I love you, Alastair,” Cordelia said. “I should not have eavesdropped on you and Charles. I have only ever wanted you to talk to me, not to overhear you.”
Alastair flushed and rose to his feet, avoiding her eyes. “You should sleep, Layla,” he said. “You've had an eventful day. And I have an important matter to attend to.”
Cordelia leaned forward to glimpse him as he left the room. “What kind of important matter?”
He ducked his head back into the room with a rare grin. “My hair,” he said, and vanished before she could ask him anything else.
Let no one who loves be called altogether unhappy. Even love unreturned has its rainbow.
âJ. M. Barrie,
The Little Minister
Lucie could not help but
be impressed, despite her conviction that it was wrong to be impressed by one's parents. Her mother had thrown together the traditional engagement party for James and Cordelia at a moment's notice, but it was so lovely one would have guessed she had spent weeks planning it. The ballroom was bright with festive witchlights and candles, the walls hung about with ribbons in wedding gilt. Lace-draped tables bore plates of sweets, all in the theme of yellow and gold: iced lemon pastries stuffed with cream, cut-glass dishes of crystallized fruit, bonbons in fancy gold wrappings on an epergne, yellow plum and apricot tartlets. There were tumbling arrangements of flowers in urns on pillars around the ballroom: peonies, creamy camellias, sheaves of tall yellow gladioli, sprays of mimosa, pale gold roses and daffodils. The room was full of happy peopleâthe quarantine was over, and everyone wanted to gather and gossip and congratulate Will and Tessa on the happiness of their offspring.
Yet Tessa, even as she slipped an arm around Will's waist and smiled at Ida Rosewain, who had arrived in a simply enormous hat, looked worried. Lucie guessed most people wouldn't see it, but she was a trained observer of her mother's moods, and besidesâshe was worried herself.
She should have been filled with delight. Her brother and her closest friend were to be married. This was a moment to be happy ever after. But she knew the truthâboth James and Cordelia had told herâthat the marriage was a sham, a formality to save Cordelia's reputation. Tessa and Will did not know, nor did anyone want to tell them. Let them think James would be happy with Cordelia. Let them think it was all real. Lucie wished she thought it was real herself, and if that could not be the case, she wished she had someone to talk to about it. The Merry Thieves had all decided to treat the marriage as if it were a lark on James's part, and she could hardly voice her worries to Cordelia and make her feel even worse than she surely did already.
Perhaps life was not like books. Perhaps life was never going to be like that. Her brother, elegant in black and white, had joined her parents in greeting guests. Gabriel and Cecily had just arrived with Anna, Alexander, and Christopher and distributed embraces and congratulations; Thomas had already come with his family. The Fairchilds had also arrived earlier, Matthew breaking away immediately from his family to make a beeline for the games room. Meanwhile, Charles was wandering around shaking hands and generally taking credit for the end of the attacks. The sound of carriages rattling into the courtyard made its own sort of odd music as the room began to fill up: the Bridgestocks arrived, Ariadne thin but bright-eyedâand with them, Grace Blackthorn.
Lucie tugged anxiously at the locket around her throat. Grace was lovely as new spring in a pale green dress, her silver-blond hair caught up in a waterfall of curls. Having seen Chiswick House up
close, Lucie wondered again that Grace always seemed so splendidly turned out when she lived in a large pile of dirty bricks.
Well, she
had
lived there. She lived with the Bridgestocks now, and would until her marriage to Charles. This was not a celebration for Grace, Lucie thought, looking at the other girl's pale face as she greeted Will and Tessa. James was perfectly composed, both he and Grace almost painfully polite as he received her congratulations. Did Grace
mind
? Lucie wondered. She was the one who had broken it off with Jamesâshe was marrying Charlesâand Lucie did not want to forgive her for breaking James's heart.
And yet. She watched Grace excuse herself and walk stiffly across the room toward Charles. They greeted each other like strangers or business partners, she thought. Oh, how she wished she could talk to Jesse. Perhaps he would be able to tell her how his sister was really feeling. Perhaps he would be able to tell her more than thatâ
“She's here,” whispered a voice in Lucie's ear. “The guest of honor.”
“Cordelia, you mean?” Lucie turned to see Jessamine hovering just beside her near the tall French doors that led out onto the stone balcony. Through them, she could see an electric streetlight in the distance, casting a strange halo on the glass. Jessamine, though, cast no reflection.
“She looks lovely,” Jessamine said. She gave a mysterious smile and vanished in the direction of the dessert table. Ghosts could not eat, but Jessamine still enjoyed looking at cakes.
Cordelia did look lovely. She came in with her mother and brother, Sona looking darkly regal in a green dress and black velvet
roosari
, Alastairâwell, Lucie hardly noticed Alastair until he handed his hat to the maid and she realized he'd dyed his hair back to its natural black. It stood out strikingly against the brown of his skin.
And then there was Cordelia, arrayed in a tapering gown of
deep blue silk and golden tulle, sleeves ruched and an opalescent brooch gathering together silk and gauze in a rosette between her breasts. Risa had dressed her hair with pearls winking among the dark red strands.
James took her hands and kissed her cheek. Both he and Cordelia looked aware of how many people were staring at them and probably whispering. Cordelia's announcement at the Enclave meeting, though it had led to marriage, remained the shock of the season.
Annoyed on their behalf, Lucie began to make her way across the room toward her family. She was headed off by Thomas, carrying their little cousin Alexander. Aunt Cecily and Uncle Gabriel had clearly palmed Alexander off on Thomas while they devoted themselves to party preparation. It was rather sweet to see tall, muscular Thomas carefully carrying a child, though Lucie would never tell him so lest he get a swelled head.
“Luce,” Thomas said. “I must go greet Cordelia and Alastair. Could you take this awful brat?”
“Not a brat,” said Alexander, who was sucking a piece of licorice.
“I
could
,” Lucie acknowledged. “I don't particularly want to, though.”
“Matthew,” demanded Alexander darkly. Matthew was his favorite pseudo-relative.
“Oscar.”
“I don't think Oscar was invited, old chap,” said Thomas. “What with him being a dog.”
“I think you'd better go look for Matthew,” said Lucie, as Alexander appeared to be about to slump into despair. Thomas gave her a wry salute and headed into the crowd, which had only grown. Lucie saw with some delight that Magnus Bane had appeared, dressed rather like a pirate, with ruby buttons on his waistcoat and ruby jewels in his ears. He definitely raised the tone of the party.
She was halfway across the room when Charles, wobbling a bit as if he'd had too much to drink, climbed up onto a low bench and
tapped his family ring against his glass. “Excuse me!” he called, as the noise in the room began to quiet. “I've something I'd like to say.”
The Herondales had been so immediately kind, welcoming Cordelia to their family. She did not know how to look them in the face, knowing it was all a lie. She was not Will and Tessa's new daughter. She and James would be divorced in a year.
James was being horrifically kind too. In the time since the engagement, Cordelia had convinced herself she had somehow trapped him into marriage. She knew perfectly well that if she hadn't thrown her reputation away to protect him, he'd be in the prisons of the Silent City. He'd been obliged to propose after that.
He did smile at her whenever he looked at herâthat lovely smile that seemed to say she was a miracle or a revelation. But it didn't help; James had a good heart, that was all. He didn't love her, and that would not change.
To her immense shock, Alastair had been a great support through the past few days. He'd brought her tea, told her jokes, played chess with her, and generally kept her mind off things. They had talked very little about Elias's return. She didn't think he'd left her alone in the house at allânot even to go see Charles.
Speaking of which, Charles had climbed on a bench and was calling out that he had something to say, creating a racket that quickly got the attention of the room. Everyone looked immensely surprised, including Tessa and Will. Sona frowned, clearly thinking Charles was very rude. She didn't know the half of it, Cordelia thought darkly.
“Let me be the first to raise a glass to the happy couple!” said Charles, doing just that. “To James Herondale and Cordelia Carstairs. I wish to add personally that James, my brother's
parabatai
, has always been like a younger brother to me.”
“A younger brother he accused of vandalizing greenhouses across our fair nation,” muttered Will.
“As for Cordelia Carstairsâhow to describe her?” Charles went on.
“Especially when one has not bothered to get to know her at all,” murmured James.
“She is both beautiful
and
fair,” said Charles, leaving Cordelia to wonder what the difference was, “as well as being brave. I am sure she will make James as happy as my lovely Grace makes me.” He smiled at Grace, who stood quietly near him, her face a mask. “That's right. I am formally announcing my intention to wed Grace Blackthorn. You will all be invited, of course.”
Cordelia glanced over at Alastair; he was expressionless, but his hands, jammed into his pockets, were fists. James had narrowed his eyes.
Charles went on merrily. “And lastly, my thanks go out to the folk of the Enclave, who supported my actions as acting Consul through our recent troubles. I am young to have borne so much responsibility, but what could I say when duty called? Only this. I am honored by the trust of my mother, the love of my bride-to-be, and the belief of my peopleâ”
“Thank you, Charles!” James had appeared at Charles's side and done something rather ingenious with his feet that caused the bench Charles had been standing on to tip over. He caught Charles around the shoulder as he slid to the floor, clapping him on the back. Cordelia doubted most people in the room had noticed anything amiss. “What an excellent speech!”
Magnus Bane, looking fiendishly amused, snapped his fingers. The loops of golden ribbons dangling from the chandeliers formed the shapes of soaring herons while “For He's a Jolly Good Fellow” began to play in ghostly fashion on the unmanned piano. James hustled Charles away from the bench he had clambered onto and into a crowd of well-wishers. The room, as a whole, seemed relieved.
“We have raised a fine son, my darling,” Will said, kissing Tessa on the cheek. He glanced over at Cordelia and smiled. “And we could ask for no lovelier girl to be his wife.”
Alastair looked as if he wished to edge away. Cordelia didn't blame him. “Thank you, Mr. Herondale,” she said. “I hope to live up to your expectations.”
Tessa looked surprised. “Why would you ever worry about that?”
“Cordelia worries,” Alastair said unexpectedly, “because of the idiots who mutter about our father, and our family. She should not let them bother her.”
Tessa laid a gentle hand on Cordelia's shoulder. “The cruel will always spread rumors,” she said. “And others who take pleasure in that cruelty will believe them and spread them. But I believe that in the end, truth wins out. Besides,” she added with a smile, “the most interesting women are always the most whispered about.”
“Very true!” said Charles, appearing suddenly in their midst. Alastair started violently. “Might I speak to Alastair for a moment? It's a private matter.”
He took hold of Alastair by the elbow and began to lead him toward one of the more shadowy nooks in the ballroom. Alastair's hand shot out and seized hold of Cordelia's wrist. To her immense surprise, she found herself dragged along after the two of them.
When Charles stopped and turned to face Alastair, he looked as surprised as Cordelia felt. “Ah, Cordelia,” he said, looking puzzled. “I had hoped to speak to your brother alone.”
“No,” Alastair said, startling Cordelia. “She will remain.”
“Che kar mikoni?”
Cordelia hissed. “Alastair,
what
are you doing? I should goâ”
“I do not wish to speak to you alone, Charles,” Alastair went on. “Surely you got my letter.”
Charles flushed. “I did not think you meant it.”
“I did,” said Alastair. “Anything further you have to say can be said in front of my sister. She will tell no one your secrets.”
Charles seemed to resign himself. “Very well,” he said tightly. “I haven't seen you since the meeting. I came by your house, but Risa indicated that you weren't at home.”
“I do not plan to be at home to you ever again,” said Alastair evenly.
Cordelia attempted another break for freedom, but Alastair was still clamped firmly onto her wrist. “I should have left you when you became engaged to Ariadne,” he said to Charles, color flaming in his cheeks. “I should have left when you abandoned her in such a terrible way. Now you are engaged yet again, and I have realized that you will never care half as much for meâor for anyoneâas for your career.”
His grip on Cordelia had loosened. She could have left, had she wanted to, but in that moment she realized Alastair needed her there. She stayed, even as Charles went a grayish color.
“Alastair,” he said. “That is not true. There is no other way.”
“There are other ways,” said Alastair. “Look at Anna. Look at Magnus Bane.”
“I am not a bohemian, willing to be exiled to the fringes of society. I wish to be the Consul. To be part of the Clave. To
matter
.”
The sound Alastair made was half pain, half exhaustion. “And you can have whatever you wish, Charles. You just cannot also have me. I wish to live my life, not to hide in the shadows as you engage yourself to a series of women in an attempt to conceal who you really are. If you choose that for yourself, it is your choice, but you cannot choose for me.”