Brecht Collected Plays: 1: Baal; Drums in the Night; In the Jungle of Cities; Life of Edward II of England; & 5 One Act Plays: "Baal", "Drums in the Night", "In the Jungle of Ci (World Classics) (48 page)

FIRST MAN
: Get some hair on your chest.

They wrestle
.

FISHERMAN
enters with his head bent forward, dripping water
: What’s the matter with you? You’re disgustingly drunk. In my cottage too. I’d kick your arsehole up through your neck if I wasn’t too tired.

They break off
.

FIRST MAN
: He started it!

SECOND MAN
: Liar!

The fisherman lies down on the leather sofa
.

FIRST MAN
: Come on out.

SECOND MAN
: Suits me.

FIRST MAN
: Night, Tom.

SECOND MAN
: Already asleep? Well, we’ll see who wins.
Exeunt both. Silence. Distant sound of the sea
.

WIFE
appears in the doorway
: Tom! Tom! Asleep.
Stretches
.

FISHERMAN
half asleep
: Shut the window! Bleeding music.

WIFE
shuts the window
: What are you lying on the sofa for?

FISHERMAN
: Shut up.

WIFE
: Can’t even be fagged to take his trousers off. What a beast. Sprawled out. Asleep already. He’ll never wake up either. And the bed’s all ours. He’s daft. Well, he’s only got himself to blame. I’m flesh and blood too.
Sits on the bed
. It’s two o’clock. It’ll be light at four. He’ll sleep till eleven, though. But everybody can see our door then. And the others’ll be off fishing, not like him. Why shouldn’t I have some fun? He’s asleep all right.
Takes the candle and puts it in the window
. Where’s he got to? Think he’s passed out? He wasn’t all that sober. Here he comes. What in God’s name is he making all that row for?
Sounds of panting and wrestling. Wife looks out. Exclaims
: Christ … Fred! And they’re fighting. O my God, save us. Our Father, which art … That’s fixed him, thank heaven.

FIRST MAN
rushing to the window
: Hey, love.

WIFE
: What
are you
after?

FIRST MAN
: Don’t ask silly questions.

WIFE
: I’ve every right to ask what you’re doing at my window.

FIRST MAN
: What did you put the light there for?

WIFE
: So you could tell he was asleep.

FIRST MAN
: You said you’d put the light there once he’d gone to sleep.

WIFE
: And that’s what he’s done.

FIRST MAN
: And that’s why I’m here.

WIFE
: I never said so.

FIRST MAN
: What’s the point of telling me, then?

WIFE
: You said you were frightened he might strike me.

FIRST MAN
: Didn’t he?

WIFE
: What for?

FIRST MAN
: For acting like that in the kitchen.

WIFE
: Oh, he was drunk.

FIRST MAN
: So why did you put the light in the window?

WIFE
: Oh, come on, or they’ll see you.

FIRST MAN
climbs right in
: There we are. A proper puzzle, you women.
Picks up the light
.

WIFE
: What’s happened to your friend?

FIRST MAN
: He got a belt in the earhole.

WIFE
: Where is he?

FIRST MAN
: Happy as a sandboy.

WIFE
: So long as you didn’t hurt him.

FIRST MAN
: Um.

WIFE
: Won’t you come over here? There’s room enough.

FIRST MAN
carrying the light around
: In a minute.

WIFE
: He’s sleeping on the sofa.

FIRST MAN
: Hadn’t we better go outside?

WIFE
: What, now? They’d see us. What are you up to?

FIRST MAN
shining the light on the fisherman’s face
: See if he’s asleep.

WIFE
: Of course he is. You’ll wake him up like that.

FIRST MAN
: Suppose we go outside …

WIFE
: Don’t you like it here?

FIRST MAN
: I like you.

WIFE
: Can you feel your way over this way?

FIRST MAN
: Why not?

WIFE
: Then we’d save the candle.
Trembling
. It’s got to do for tomorrow.

FIRST MAN
puts out the light, feels his way
: He’s pissed to the eyebrows.

WIFE
: On the sofa.

FIRST MAN
: Not in the bed. Those your knees?

WIFE
: Yes. Look out. Sit down there.

FIRST MAN
: He’s completely pissed.

WIFE
: He’s like an animal.

FIRST MAN
: Is that your hand?

WIFE
: What’s he want to get so boozed for?

FIRST MAN
: So I can carry him home.

WIFE
: And to get me out of bed.

FIRST MAN
: Warm, was it?

WIFE
: I was waiting.

FIRST MAN
: In your nightdress …

WIFE
: He caught nothing all day.

FIRST MAN
: What about putting out his nightlines?

WIFE
: He’s a pig, I tell you.

FIRST MAN
more laboriously, like her
: That your breast?

WIFE
: Leave me alone.

FIRST MAN
: Does it hurt?

WIFE
: Leave me alone, Mac.

FIRST MAN
: You put the light there.

WIFE
: But you – you mustn’t do that.

FIRST MAN
: So the Sixth Commandment says.

WIFE
: Your breath doesn’t stink of brandy; that’s something.

FIRST MAN
: I’m respectable.

WIFE
: Leave my knee alone.

FIRST MAN
: It’ll be more comfortable for you.

WIFE
: Ow!

FIRST MAN
: Let’s get rid of that.

WIFE
: You get rid of it.

FIRST MAN
: That’s better.

WIFE
: No, no.

FIRST MAN
: Can’t you keep still for a minute?

The stone falls to the floor with an immense crash. The wife gives a subdued scream, the man curses, then the two of them lie quite motionless
.

FISHERMAN
lifts his head
: The sky’s fallen in. Hullo. That’s going to cost her a packet. Waking me up.
Gets up and lights the candle
. Must have blown it out almost at once. Bastards.
Addressing the bed
: Cheers, Mac. Back here again? Are you all that pissed? That’s fine. Right over the top? Ha ha ha!
Bastards! – How’s that for a draught of fishes? Glory be to God. The Lord rewardeth the just even as they sleep, Mac.
Goes to the window
.

FIRST MAN
rolling about and cursing
: Bloody buggery, a net.

FISHERMAN
: Right first time. Don’t bust yourselves. It’ll hold.
She
mended it. And to think I caught nothing all day. I felt so sleepy.
Drumming on the window-sill
. Hey, fish! fish! Something worth looking at here, boys. Come along over. Got something here. Dearly beloved brethren, I’ve made a catch.

VOICES
: You all right in the head? – What’s it about?

FISHERMAN
: Fish! Fish!

VOICES
: You’re bloody drunk.

FISHERMAN
: Across here! Fish!

FIRST MAN
: For Christ’s sake. It’s
your
reputation that’ll suffer.

FISHERMAN
: It did suffer, Mac. Fish! Fish!
Goes to the door
.

FISHERMEN
come crowding in
: What’s up? – What’s all the row about? – Had a baby?

FISHERMAN
: Something’s happened. I’ve caught some fish.

THE OTHERS
craning their heads
: Here? – A minute ago you were pissed as arseholes.

FISHERMAN
: Too pissed, I was. That’s why I couldn’t go out. I did my fishing here.

THE OTHERS
: O he’s too far gone. – Where’s his wife? You can get some sense out of her.

FISHERMAN
: My wife’s gone. I’m so stinking pissed I think she must have turned into a fish. Hear that wind? That’s God Almighty coming in the storm-cloud. Go forth, says he, and thou shalt make a great catch.

THE OTHERS
: Better slop some water over his head. – He’s wandering.

FISHERMAN
moves away shouting, having blocked the view up to now
: Fish! Fish!

THE OTHERS
pressing forward
: She dead? Is that a body? – Look, there’s another. There are two of them. – Is that a body?
All laugh
. It’s his wife with Mac!

FIRST MAN
on the bed, under the net
: For Christ’s sake get that thing off us. For … Christ’s sake … put some kind of sheet over us, will you?

THE OTHERS
roaring with laughter
: It’s all a matter of habit, as the woman said to the eel when she skinned him. – What’s sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander, as the wife said on her wedding night. – That was a bright idea, getting in there, mate. – You’re in clover. Must have had a struggle to make it, eh?

FISHERMAN
: I bet he’d stand the company a bucket of rum to be allowed out.

FIRST MAN
: A bucket of rum, you old devil, but let’s have a sheet first.

FISHERMAN
to one of the spectators
: Go and get the rum, mate, before he thinks better of it. Now then, boys, let’s take these fish and drop them in the bay to cool off. Take that pole and carry them carefully, like in a procession, with some nice singing. This isn’t something you’ll see every day.

THE OTHERS
loop the net over a pole. Two of them carry the couple out, amid great laughter
: Take it easy, kids! Don’t burst yourselves laughing. – Better knock off a moment. – If you come back you’ll have done better than a fart; they only go one way.

FISHERMAN
: Fine fish! Glistening fish! Fresh fat frisking fish! They can swim away; I don’t want them. Let them go, I give up. But it was a splendid catch. And all of you must stay here, because you’re invited to the wake. My wife’s died; she was a good soul. So have some of the rum her lover’s bought us and let’s celebrate my being in the shit. Sit down with me; you can help me drown my sorrows.
The fishermen sit down. A jar of rum is brought in. Some of them sing. A game of cards starts
.

FISHERMAN
lights candles
: Those are the lights of the dead, those candles in the mugs. Careful not to blow them out when you laugh. This table’s in a house of mourning. Kindly turn your heads away when you throw up. I’m
giving you glasses from the pub, because my wife’s dead and I don’t know where our own are kept.

Wind blows. Fishermen sing
.

A FISHERMAN
: Wind’s getting up. It’s chilly outside. Drink up and keep warm.

A SECOND
: God, how I laughed. I liked it when they wriggled, but it was still better when they lay doggo and pretended they weren’t there and hid their faces in the sheets. Ha ha ha!

FISHERMAN
: This is a house of mourning, and I must ask you not to laugh. Can’t you get drunk without making all that noise? Don’t you see I want to pass out?

A THIRD
: Ah, she was a good wife, she was: she kept you going. Washed your face and brushed your hair and let you kick her about.

THE FIRST
: What a wind! Just you listen to that wind.

A FOURTH
: Better drink up. That wind’s no business
of yours
.

THIRD
: She didn’t half look good in that nightdress, let me tell you.

SECOND
: That wasn’t a nightdress. That was a shroud.

FIRST
: When she clasped the top of it and pressed up to Mac so as to stop us seeing, that was your fault, Tom.

FOURTH
: It started with a bang, and the rum’s good, but there’s no real atmosphere.

The two fishermen (fifth and sixth) come back
.

FIFTH
: There was a bloody great splash.

SIXTH
: They asked for it.

FIFTH
: Your own bed; I ask you.

SIXTH
: Didn’t half yell, they did.

FIFTH
: Go on, can’t you lot say anything? It’s like a funeral here.

SIXTH
: Rum, no wife: what else do you want?

FISHERMAN
: Sit down and shut up. My wife’s dead. The wind’s up now, and when it drops she won’t be there. She was a good wife, and God has come and taken away his own. The wind’s got up, listen, drink, and let’s say my wife drowned in the wind.

SECOND
: Don’t take it too hard. She lost her head.

FOURTH
: She oughtn’t to have done it, not in your bed.

FISHERMAN
: God has punished me. I’ve drunk too much. She was the best wife I’ve got. The wind came, and the boat went down with her. Drink up and say a rosary for her and her soul. Hail, Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee. Lord grant her eternal rest.
He prays on his own
.