Better Off Dead (24 page)

Bill didn’t say anything as he handed his phone to Tallis who checked it one last time, before placing it into his sporran.

“Don’t get any ideas, yo,” Bill started. “I want that phone back.” He narrowed his eyes on the enormous Scotsman. “Got lotsa chick’s digits, ya know?”

“An so ye shall hae it,” Tallis responded. “As soon as fis mission is ova.”
Then, without another word, he started forward, pushing through the gate, with me right behind him and Bill right behind me.

As soon as my foot touched the asphalt road of the Underground City, my stomach felt as if it were trying to turn inside out. It was so sudden, and the pain so immeasurable that I couldn’t move, breathe or even think for at least a few seconds. Then it felt like someone dropped a hundred-pound sack on top of my shoulders, even though no one had. My knees buckled in response and I collapsed onto the freezing ground. Despair, the likes of which I’d never known, completely overcame me. A deluge of tears fell from my eyes and my chest heaved with sobs.

“Lily!” Bill yelled, throwing his arms around me and trying to lift me.

My body was so weak, I could only flop around in his arms like a dying fish. But I wasn’t fully aware of anything, really, except fear, which radiated through me. The pain became so fierce, I couldn’t think of anything else, much less comprehend what was going on around me.

I suddenly saw nothing but darkness. I could hear Bill’s and Tallis’s voices, but couldn’t make out what they were saying. Someone shook me and when my eyes popped open, I realized it was Tallis. He was holding me, and gripping my cheeks to hold my head up as he forced my mouth open. The agony inside me continued to rage. It felt as if my blood was on fire, along with my organs and skin. I was barely aware of Tallis’s thumb over my mouth until I saw drops of red sailing through the air and felt them landing on my tongue. I frowned at the salty taste, which was instantly replaced by a searing pain that overcame my entire body.

“Hauld ’er!” Tallis shouted at Bill.

Faced with darkness again, I could feel Tallis’s large hand around my upper arm as he shook me, and forced my eyes open. I felt thick fingers around my neck, and I flopped my head back, only to see Bill, who was holding me in place. My bleary vision returned to Tallis who appeared rather angry above me, using his free hand and squeezing his thumb until blood gushed up. He rotated his thumb, holding it above my mouth, while using his other hand to part my lips and ensure my mouth was open. I felt the drops fall on my teeth. Tallis squeezed my lower jaw between his thumb and index finger, forcing my mouth open wider. Then many more drops of blood landed on my tongue.

“Swallaw!” he yelled at me.

My throat was swollen shut and the blood that landed on my tongue simply pooled in the back of my mouth. I was so overcome by whatever was destroying me that I didn’t even buck at the realization that Tallis was feeding me his blood.

“Swallaw, damn ye!” he roared again and at the fury in his eyes, I felt a bite of fear which urged me to open my throat, if only slightly. I threw my head forward, and tried desperately to swallow. Tallis thumped me hard on the back, causing my throat to open for the briefest moment, and I swallowed a mouthful of his blood.

I had no idea how much time passed until I could inhale deeply. It could have been a mere few seconds or a whole minute. As soon as the icy air filled my lungs, I exhaled it and inhaled again. With every breath came renewed relief. The fire devouring my insides began to subside and I could now breathe and swallow with much more ease.

“Are you all right, babydoll?” Bill whispered, his wide, concerned eyes on me.

I felt winded and unable to form words so I just glanced up at him and tried to nod. Bill looked at Tallis, still standing above me, with a frown. “What happened to her?”

Tallis sighed and studied me for another few moments, while I took notice of my surroundings. I was resting against Tallis’s immense chest and I felt his muscular thigh beneath my back as he knelt. I continued to inhale and exhale deeply, as my vision began to clear.

“Innocence cannae exist in thess place,” Tallis said softly, his eyes on me, and a haunted expression on his face.

“What does that mean?” I ground out, in a rough voice. I tried to lift my head, but Tallis held me in place, firmly shaking his head.

“Take yer time, Besom.” He took a deep breath. “Yer innocence was bein’ strangled, taken frae ye.”

“But your blood?” I started before he interrupted me.

“’Tis th’ bluid ah someone devoid ah innocence. Ah polluted ye wif it, tah save ye.”

Reaching forward, he lifted me underneath my arms, and pulled me to my feet at the same time that he stood up. My body felt light, pins and needles numbing my extremities. He started to release me, but when my knees began to buckle again, he reestablished his grip.

“Shake yer feit oot,” he commanded.

Obeying his order, I felt the warm flush of blood returning to my toes, stinging like a blazing fire. I shook my hands and felt each of my fingers come alive again, thanks to Tallis’s blood. “I think I’m okay,” I said softly.

Tallis released me, and this time, despite being a bit unsteady, I managed to remain on my feet. I took a step, feeling stronger with every second that passed.

“Are ye right?” Tallis asked, studying me with his piercing midnight eyes.

I took a deep breath, surprised to feel like I was mostly back to myself. “Thank you,” I whispered.

He just nodded, evidently uncomfortable with my show of gratitude. He simply turned around and resumed his stance ahead of me. The awful demon skull continued glaring down at me from its position against his back. Bill stepped behind me as we started forward again, walking single file, into the city.

My first impression of the city, from this side of the gate, was that it was pretty much like any other city. Skyscrapers reached the clouds while a few paved roads wove between the buildings. The only difference I could make out between this city and any other was its utter lack of foliage. There were no trees, bushes or vegetation of any kind. In every direction, nothing but asphalt and concrete were visible. The sky, too, lacked any life. No birds or insects, only ugly, monolithic buildings. The air was remarkably chilly, and smelled like the inside of an old freezer.

Tallis’s stride was long and purposeful as we started down the street. With Bill just behind me and Tallis right in front of me, I felt some level of protection. I gripped my sword as tightly as I could, scared to death at what awaited us, although I had to admit that, so far, the city didn’t appear that threatening—unless you considered urban sprawl threatening. ’Course, I
had
nearly died as soon as I touched foot in the place … but I didn’t want to think about that. Not now. Not when I needed to pay attention to my surroundings, and remain on the alert.

We moved at a fast clip. As soon as we passed the first skyscraper, the clouds in the sky eclipsed the moon, leaving us in near darkness. My eyes widened as I glanced around and saw we weren’t alone. I wasn’t sure why I hadn’t seen them before, or maybe we were too close to the entrance of the city for them to freely walk around; but now we were surrounded by what appeared to be business men. They wore suits as they shuffled this way and that, all rushing about in a hurry.

“Ew, someone got walloped with the ugly stick,” Bill whispered as one of the “business men” crossed Tallis’s path.

I gasped when my eyes fell on the … creature. Its body looked like a man’s, but its face had lines so deep, it almost looked like a mummy. It had no hair, but a round, greyish head with what looked like spaghetti weaving across it. Its face was a salmon pink, while its nose and mouth appeared almost orange. Sheets of taut skin formed the bridge of its nose and walled in its eyes, making them look as if they were small and deeply set. The lower region of its face was charcoal black. Four teeth peeked out of the narrow drain of its striated mouth. It glanced over at us with a hostile expression, pausing for a second or two when it saw Tallis. Then it retreated and we continued forward, the moon’s illumination reflecting the sheen of its sports coat.

“What was it?” I breathed down Tallis’s neck.

“Ah watcher,” he answered with little interest. We turned to the right once the street T-boned into another. “They keep an eye oan fings, reportin’ back tae th
’ master.”

“Who is the master?”

“The keeper ah th’ Oonderground City.”

Another watcher crossed our path, and gave each of us the once-over. Even though this one also continued on his way, just like the other one had, I definitely sensed that neither one was exactly happy to see us. “Will they report our whereabouts?” I
asked.

“Aye, they awreddy hae.”

“How?” I demanded, frowning as I wondered how that could be since none of them carried cell phones or walkie-talkies, or anything else of that nature.

“They are th
’ master’s eyes,” Tallis responded. “Whit they see, he sees.”

“Then the master knows we’re here?” I continued, gripping my sword so tightly, my knuckles turned white.

“Aye.”

“Is he going to come after us?” I asked, unable to mask my fear.

“Ah doona ken,” Tallis answered, his tone of voice level, precise. “Boot it doesnae matta. Ye have ah reit tae be haur, as ye are employed by AfterLife Enterprises.”

“Then there’s nothing anyone can do about us being here?” I asked immediately, feeling slightly relieved at the mere idea.

“Jist coz ye have ah reit tae be haur doesnae mean anyone has tae like it. An’ moost doennae like oos bein’ haur.”

The watchers continued coming and going, some stopping and staring at us while others showed less interest. I stayed quiet, almost afraid to attract attention or distract my own attention away from constant awareness of our surroundings.

“Shit, you weren’t kiddin’, Conan,” Bill piped up as he pointed to the end of the street.

In slow motion, I turned my head and swallowed hard. There, in red, glowing fluorescent lights, was a sign that spelled out:
Freak Show.

“I came into a place mute of all light, which bellows as the sea does in a tempest, if by opposing winds 't is combated.”

—
   
Dante’s
Inferno

FOURTEEN

Luckily for me, my new body was healthy and fit, otherwise I might have had a heart attack or a stroke because my heart was beating so quickly. I was intensely reluctant to even consider crossing the threshold of the amusement park,
Freak Show
, the first level of the Underground City.

Reluctant or not, however, we started forward and passed through the turnstiles which separated the amusement park from the rest of the city. I immediately focused on the brilliant lights of the numerous rides and attractions surrounding me. The garishly colorful lights almost blinded me against the backdrop of the pitch-black sky. What was even more uncanny was that we appeared to be the only ones here, as far as I could tell anyway. Even though the rides were lit up and some were even moving, there wasn’t a soul in sight. It was as if every patron had simply disappeared.

“What does Dante say about this level?” I demanded of Bill, not daring to glance over my shoulder to look at him. Nope, instead I kept strict attention on everything in front and beside me.

“I don’t frickin’ know,” Bill answered, sounding put out.

“Well, look!” I railed at him, not meaning to sound so angry, but I was beyond scared, and my fear was doing a number on my nerves. “You’re the one with the book!”

I could hear Bill grunting as he reached into his back pocket. Seconds later, I recognized the sounds of him rustling through the pages of the
Inferno
. I yanked my foot forward when I felt him stepping on my heel and clipping me.

“Sorry,” he muttered. “Not exactly easy to read and walk.”

“It’s okay, just get to the part about this level.” I needed some sort of warning as to what we would encounter next, and even though Tallis was less than impressed with Dante’s travel guide, I was desperate for the information.

“Chitty-chitty-bang-bang, we love you,” Bill started singing beneath his breath as he continued rustling through the pages. “Oh yeah, chitty-chitty-bang-bang, where the fuck is level one?”

More sounds of pages turning as he fumbled through them. “Found it!” he called jubilantly before clearing his throat. “Um, Dante says this is the level of the lustful.” He was quiet for a second or two. “Damn right, maybe we’re gonna see some tig ol’ bitties.”

I rolled my eyes and shook my head at the same time that Tallis slightly turned his head in my direction. “Whit is he goin’ oan aboot?”

“Boobs. He’s talking about boobs,” I muttered, wishing I had the peace of mind to be thinking about male body parts instead of my impending fate.

“Why?” Tallis continued. I could see his furrowed brow in his profile.

“Because he’s Bill,” I answered, rather snidely. Tallis just shrugged and faced forward again, the demon skull grinning down at me while I tried to ignore it.

“This shit don’t look very sexy to me,” Bill grumbled.

“No, it doesn’t,” I agreed. Glancing over my right shoulder, I took in an awful carnie ride just beside me. It appeared to be a haunted house or something of that nature. At the entrance and, coincidentally, hanging just above me was a green monster prop. It had a skull for a head, and its bright, blinking lavender eyes were making me nauseous. Red and yellow lights danced in the background beyond it, their flashes enough to give someone a seizure. I moved my eyes from the green monster to another prop beside it—a skull with small horns protruding from its forehead and cheekbones, with a whole lot of blood just below its chin. Its infernal, yellow eyes glowed from their gaping eye sockets as its mouth chomped up and down.

Continuing forward, the sudden sounds of carnie music began to roll through hidden speakers, the music sounding tinny and old. A roller coaster revved to life beside us, and the sound of its cars skidding on the tracks was the perfect macabre soundtrack
to my overwrought mind. My heart was pounding so fiercely, I felt winded and almost dizzy. Recordings of screams and shrieks pierced the black sky, lending the grisly paintings on the side of a fun house a more extreme level of realness. One painting was of a demon with shark teeth wielding a sword, and another was of a moon with a vampire face. The word
Thriller
lit up the entryway to the fun house, the white lights giving way to red, as if the letters themselves were bleeding.

“Well, this just killed anymore circuses for me,” Bill ground out with a humph.

“This isn’t a circus,” I corrected him, my voice faltering. “It’s an amusement park.”

“Whatever it is, it’s givin’ me the fright shits.”

“At least you can’t be killed,” I muttered, feeling sorry for myself again. I was the only one of us to whom this place could do permanent damage. Apparently, I also seemed to be the only one concerned about it.

Tallis continued down the asphalt, never turning his head in either direction. Instead, he paid strict attention to wherever we were going. And he wasn’t just strolling either; he was walking at such a fast pace, Bill and I had a
hard time keeping up with him. ’Course, given the fact that we were in the bowels of hell, I couldn’t really blame him—getting in and getting out did seem to be the best plan.

Tallis took a right when the street dead-ended in front of us; and after another few paces, he stopped dead in his tracks. Before us was an area of the amusement park which appeared to be shut down. There were no lights in this section; just an unused roller coaster, an abandoned Ferris wheel, and a body piercing station that appeared to be long forgotten. A large, resin clown’s face leaned against the wall. Its black-and-orange-striped hat nearly reached the shop’s sign overhead. The clown’s eyes were open, and aside from the thick layer of dust, it appeared to be in decently good condition.

Another large sign overhead read:
Welcome to Fun Town
. The letters and the bottom of the sign were also made to look like blood was dripping off them, but the paint was peeling and, as such, was less than convincing. No sooner did I drop my attention from the sign than the Ferris wheel suddenly came to life, erupting into a brilliant display of green and blue lights. The seats swung to and fro, as the wheel circled through the black air, even though no one was riding in them and no one was operating the ride.

“They ken we are haur,” Tallis said softly. “Be ready.”

At his words, a spike of fear shot straight down my spine. I didn’t know just what I needed to be ready for but I clutched my sword as tightly as I could and stood stock still, right behind Tallis. I waited for him to take another step.

“Ah am oan AfterLife Enterprises business, an’ wilnae be denied!”
Tallis yelled, although I wasn’t sure to whom he was yelling, since there was no one in sight. There was no response. But a slight whisper of wind suddenly kicked up and threw itself full-force against us. Then, from the shadows on our right, I heard the sound of labored, heavy breathing, like a smoker with asthma who’d just tried to run a marathon. Even though the breathing started as a faint sound, it got louder and louder until it seemed to fill my entire head. It was the definite sound of someone breathing, no, panting in my ears. I cranked my head to the left and right, but saw nothing, only darkness.

“The bladessssmith!” The serpent hiss came from right beside Tallis. In a split second, something materialized from thin air, within inches of him. To Tallis’s credit, he didn’t flinch
. He didn’t even move.

I screamed and jumped, I couldn’t help it. As soon as I did, though, the creature turned its hideous face in my direction and I found myself staring into the soulless eyes of the most menacing, ferocious … clown I’d ever seen. Its head was bald, with two tufts of fire-engine red hair sticking out of the sides right above its ears, like Bozo. It wore a white, Elizabethan collar that framed its hideous face. Frankenstein-like stitches attached its skin to its head. Its face was painted white, and its nose red, while black paint circled its eyes and Joker-like mouth. Blood oozed from the stitches that held its upper and lower eyelids open. It seemed to have a perpetual grimace, the corners of its lips pulling up all the way to its temples and revealing two sets of savage-looking, pointed teeth. Its eyes glowed a fierce red.

I gulped so hard, I was afraid I’d swallowed my tongue.

“And who isss thissss?” the thing asked while cocking its head to such a degree that a human neck would have broken. Its voice reminded me of a talking snake—it accentuated its esses.

“Nae oone ye need tae bortha yerself wif, Ragur,” Tallis answered in a steely voice, not even an ounce of fear in his tone. “We hae coome fur the sool an’ sae we shall retrieve it.”

But Ragur, the obscenely ugly clown, didn’t hear Tallis or, more probably, just didn’t care. Instead, it stared at me, its head arcing in each direction as it examined everything about me with an expression of complete fascination. I swallowed down my own utter revulsion and fear, refusing to drop my gaze from the blood-red of its eyes, refusing to notice how it smiled even more broadly to reveal its myriad razor-sharp teeth.

The only sound to fill the air was the creature’s labored heavy breathing, the same sound that had been echoing through my head only moments earlier.

“Hey, Darth Breather, move along. Ain’t nothin’ more ta look at here,” Bill announced from behind me.

“Angel,” the clown hissed. It turned its head and glared at Bill right before it spat a loogie beside Bill’s feet. Its spit, the color of lemonade and the consistency of Jell-O, immediately fizzed against the concrete, burning a hole into it.

“Son of a bitch!” Bill yelled as he hopped back like a frightened rabbit.

My heart climbed up into my throat as I clenched my sword tightly, wondering if I’d need to use it. A second or so later, Ragur simply stepped aside. Tallis, never one to waste time, proceeded forward, with Bill and me right behind him, like baby ducks in a row.

“What the hell was that messed up shit?” Bill roared. “Flippin’ Stephen King just nearly took ma damn toes off!” he continued once we were out of earshot from Ragur. That is, of course, unless the clown also possessed incredible hearing—something I didn’t want to find out. “Frickin’ thing nearly turned me into handiman!” Jabbing me in the back, he asked, “You see that shit, nips?”

“Yes, Bill, I saw it.”

“’Twas ah demoon,” Tallis answered nonchalantly as he reached into his sporran, and pulled out Bill’s phone. He glanced down at it for a moment or two before putting it back, and saying, “Fiss way.”

We walked down a long and dark walkway, a thick black tarp obscuring the top of the walkway and falling down on either side of us, so that we were completely enclosed by it. I felt beyond claustrophobic. Upon reaching the end of the walkway, I realized we were on a boardwalk that led into a black and white tent, similar to what you’d see in a circus. The entrance to the tent was a simple flap, which was pulled to one side and fastened.

Tallis had to duck under the flap; Bill and I were right behind him. As soon as I entered the tent, I felt innumerable large, fat drops of rain as they shot down from the tent’s
canopy. The rain came down so hard, it was deafening and I had a hard time keeping my eyes open. I ran my sleeve across my face, clearing my bleary vision, only to have my eyes flooded with more rain.

“What is this place?” I had to shout against the torrential downpour. Wiping my arm across my eyes again, I tried to identify what I was looking at. A whirlwind of lights, circling round and round in a hurricane suddenly appeared in the center of the tent. Surrounding the hurricane was nothing but darkness—so dark that I couldn’t even see the tent’s walls. It was as if we’d walked inside the tent, only to end up outside during a severe storm.

The driving rain splashed right past the revolving lights which changed direction, whenever a gale of freezing wind pushed through them. The lights began to change color from a greyish-white to a blazing yellow-green, and then to an aqua blue. They moved so quickly, they were no more than a mere blur.

“Sools,” Tallis answered as he plodded forward, forging a path against the wind, and taking us ever closer to the tempest in the center of the tent.

“Souls?” I repeated as I peered at the whirling lights more closely. “It just looks like a bunch of swirling lights.”