Awaken to Pleasure (11 page)

“Can’t?” she cried, desperate. “You have to! It feels wonderful.” The sensation of his big body moving inside her was the best thing she’d ever experienced.

He glanced down at her with that dark male look that had always scared her. Except on him, it made her want to pet and soothe. And give.

“I. Can’t. Go. Slow.” He was enunciating his words very carefully, as if he’d forgotten how to speak English. The Italian in him was very much apparent, all smoky heat and possessive hunger.

Wrapping her arms and legs tight around him, she whispered, “Then go fast.” Her trust in him was absolute.

“Taylor.”
His eyes went darker than night at her consent and she could almost see his control snap. “Hold on,
mia moglie e bellissima.”

Clasping her hard against him, he surged into her and then there was only passionate fury. Her husband’s body drove deeper and deeper until she felt indelibly marked. Forever branded. Her skin tightened over her entire body as he stroked her closer to a shattering crescendo so magnificent that her mind could barely comprehend the sensory overload.

Then every muscle in her body seemed to stiffen and barely a second later, explode. She screamed as hot, hard sex
ual pleasure short-circuited every nerve she possessed, shocking her into ecstasy so powerful that she felt singed. Her only anchor was her husband, big and powerful and hers.

Hers.

J
ackson roused at six the next morning to find Taylor crushed under him. He lifted himself off at once.

“Whatchya doin’?” A sleepy Taylor raised her arms above her head and stretched. Her breasts rubbed against his chest, plump and inviting.

“I was squashing you.” He laid his hand on her rib cage, indulging in the feel of her sleep-warmed skin, like liquid satin under his palm.

“Um.” Lazy blue eyes blinked at him. She raised her hands and squeezed his biceps. “You’re kinda heavy but I didn’t mind. It’s nice. Like a sexy blanket.” Then she tried to span one muscular upper arm with her small hands, without success. “You’re so…” She just sighed.

His throat turned dry. “I wasn’t hurting you?”

She leaned up and ran her teeth along the muscles she seemed fascinated with. “What?”

“Never mind. Go right ahead.” He let her push him onto his back, more than ready for her soft caresses.

To his surprise, she suddenly sat up wide-awake. “Am I being selfish? I should be thinking about my brother.”

“We’ve done all we can for the moment.” He reached up to touch her cheek. “Enjoy yourself. It might be tough for a while once the paparazzi descend.”

Her scowl was ferocious. “If they hurt you again, I swear I’ll kill someone.”

He pulled her down to sprawl on top of him. “Thank you.” His heart was so used to cynicism that he could barely understand this new emotion shouldering its way in.

“You’re welcome.” She made a solemn face, then leaned up on her elbows and kissed his jaw. “Jackson?”

“Yes,
piccola?”
He felt such tenderness for her that he spoke to her as he never did to another human being.

“Thank you for last night.”

She was thanking him for the most sensual experience of his life? “I’m the grateful one here, Taylor. I’ve only one word to describe you. Hot.”

“Really?” She propped herself up on his chest with her forearms. “I’m hot?” Her wildly tousled hair caressed his skin while her smile brought sunshine into the room.

“Yes.” He chuckled at her delight. “I forgot to give you something last night.”

“What?”

“It’s over there, in the drawer.” He hadn’t wanted to give her the intimate gift until she’d accepted him as a lover, but hadn’t been able to stop himself from buying it.

She wiggled off his body and walked over, holding a sheet to her front. Grinning, he feasted on the back view instead. “This big box?” She pulled out a flat box, her long hair curling just above her bottom, drawing his eye to her perfect shape.

“Yes.” Hot was an understatement. She was giving him third-degree burns with that body of hers.

He sat up when she came to kneel beside him on the bed. Tearing off the paper, she bared the name of a well-known lingerie designer. “Ooooooh.” Eyes wide, she pulled off the lid to expose several pieces of lacey silk underwear. Picking up a tiny pair of panties, she gave him an arch look. “Is this a present for me or you?”

He kissed a nipple, biting back a smile. “Both.”

She dropped the silky creation back into the box and pushed her hands through his hair, her smile bright. “I think I’m okay now, Jackson. I’m not afraid anymore.”

He looked up into her blue eyes. “Perhaps you accept that you are safe with me in bed, but what about the fears in here?” He touched her heart.

She looked troubled. “Just being able to make love isn’t enough, is it?”

“No, but it’s a fine place to start.” He tumbled her below him, vowing to teach her to entrust him with her love. For now, he’d work on obtaining her complete trust in bed, because despite her belief that she wasn’t afraid anymore, flickers of fear still shadowed her eyes, her wounds too deep to be healed by one night of loving.

To her everlasting shock, Taylor found that she liked sex with Jackson. There was no painful groping, no horrible kissing, no embarrassment. It was just bliss. Two days of indulging her new addiction hadn’t in any way lessened her ardor. Though it worried her that Jackson was holding back so as not to scare her, that worry wasn’t enough to dim her delight at having overcome her fear of intimacy.

Keeping her end of their bargain was no longer an issue…physically. But, what about the emotional scars? Jackson had alluded to her decision never to love, but he had
no way of knowing that she feared having a child even more than simply loving. If her mother hadn’t been pregnant with her, she might’ve been less vulnerable to a man like Lance. And, if Helena hadn’t had Nick to link her to Lance, she might not have descended into despair at his desertion.

But, she thought with sudden insight, she wasn’t Helena and Jackson was unlike any other man she knew. Lance had never wanted her because she was another man’s child. Well, so was Nick. Yet, Jackson’s treatment of him had been nothing short of paternal.

But what about her? Was she strong enough, secure enough to give Jackson what he wanted? The truth was, she didn’t know. He was the only man she could ever imagine being with, but a part of her didn’t believe that he’d never leave her and condemn her to the emotional hell Helena had endured. Perhaps time would prove her fears to be groundless. But, the clock was running against her. If she wasn’t pregnant within twelve months, she’d lose her husband. Yet, a year wasn’t very long when she’d had twenty-four years to nurture her beliefs about marriage, children and a woman’s dependence on a man.

Jackson walked out of the shower while she was sitting on the bed. Immediately, she pushed her anxiety aside. For this week out of time, she’d given herself permission to indulge. There would be more than enough time to face reality when they returned home.

Towel hitched around his lean waist, he shoved a hand through his wet hair. Instead of heading to the wardrobe, he stood in the centre of the bedroom, scowl on his face.

My, but he was sexy, she thought, her face heating. So rawly masculine that it made her feel ultimately female. She might like sex but she was new at it. Her husband’s thickly muscled body made her want to squeeze and stroke and just plain old touch! She bit her lower lip as heat pooled in her
stomach and spread throughout her body, fingers of flame that enticed and urged.

“What’re you thinking?” she asked softly, shifting to kneel on the bed. Her frivolous and decadently short white nightie, part of Jackson’s gift, brushed her upper thighs. The tiny hairs on her bare arms rose in anticipation.

“Hmm?” He walked over to stand in front of her kneeling form. “The call this morning was about our newest picture. Britnee Case is demanding another million.”

She raised a brow. “That girl’s not worth it.”

He nodded. “But she’s the only one David wants.”

“Hmm.” She ran a finger up his washboard stomach, still slightly damp. “Can you replace David?”

He slid his hands through her unbound hair. In the heat, she would’ve preferred to put it up, but she was well aware that her husband liked to play with it. And she wanted to please her husband, the way he pleased her.

Deep inside, she was afraid that he found her wanting. He always had to hang onto his control because, despite everything, she wasn’t quite able to make love without fear yet. Groundless fear. He would never hurt her—she just had to remember that and she’d be fine.

“No, he’s too valuable,” he said. “The last movie he directed is the hot favorite for several Golden Globes. Even more important,” he admitted wryly, “his films make money.”

Something floated up from her subconscious. “David’s proud of his rep as a straight arrow. Drop a few hints that if you meet Britnee’s demands, it might look like you were doing favors for the director’s lover. He’ll either talk Britnee around or get another actress.”

“Lover?” His voice was becoming husky.

Screwing up her courage, she licked his stomach. Impossibly, the muscles tightened even more. “Uh-huh. A little birdie told me.”

“Taylor, you’re an excellent source of information and you haven’t even been in the business for a year.” His hand fisted in her hair, a heavy weight that told her he liked what she was doing.

Used to the way he played with her hair, she found the gesture possessive but nonthreatening. “I kept in touch with the staff I met while working for you.” Her real objective had been to keep track of him, but gossip of all sorts had flowed to her. She’d be useful to him in that way as she had no intention of letting those contacts lapse. “Is using that kind of stuff unethical?”

“Not when she’s blackmailing us with the location shoot scheduled to start in three days.”

“Umm.” Just to see if she could, she tried to take a bite out of his firm stomach. There wasn’t enough excess flesh to do so.

He tugged at her hair. When she glanced up, he said, “Only if you want to,
piccola.
I am in no hurry.”

She was shocked that he understood her fears. “I want to be the woman you need.”

“You are. Everything about you pleases me.”

The simple statement rebuilt her confidence and the look in his eyes reignited her desire. “How much do you exercise to stay like this?” She kissed her way halfway up his chest, relieved to be allowed to just touch his body, without expectations or demands.

He tugged her head up with the hand clenched in her hair, dark eyes indulgent in a way that she’d only ever seen in bed. When he looked at her like that, she wanted to lay herself down for his delectation.

“I always kept fit but after Bonnie began to cheat, I did it obsessively. Better than becoming an alcoholic.” His smile was tight.

Bonnie, she thought with an inward flare of anger, had a lot to answer for. “And now?”

“Habit. Once a day or at least once every two. Why?”

“Can I watch?” she found herself asking, admitting to a secret fantasy that was at once exciting and scandalous.

“Watch?” He was aroused under the towel. In fact, she had no idea how the soft white fabric was staying in place.

“You, working out. Do you wear a T-shirt?” She saw him swallow. Her heartbeat accelerated.

“Sometimes. Do you want me to?” Rough and dangerous, his tone told her that she’d be well loved tonight.

If she wanted to be loved.

His hunger for her was a heady aphrodisiac that made her fight her fears. “No. I want to see you sweat.”

He groaned. “Taylor, I hope you’re trying to seduce me because if you’re not, we’re in big trouble.”

She laughed and stood up on the bed, which made her a little taller than him. “Am I any good?”

A slow smile broke across that dark face. “You’re better than good.” His hands rested on her barely covered bottom, moving in slow circles. “How about you pay up?” A far more serious question lingered in his eyes.

“Promise, first.” She pressed close, a silent answer to his unasked question. This play was more than okay. It was delicious and tempting and wicked.

“Promise what?” He seemed distracted by her breasts.

“That I can watch.” The heavy sensuality on his face made her want to give him the delight he gave her in bed, made her want to be bold and sexy and wild. She’d never know whether she had it in her if she didn’t try.

He shuddered. “Promise. Now, down woman.”

Taylor slithered out of his arms and down his body before Jackson could catch her, a look in her eyes that seared him from the inside out.

“No.” She pushed at his abdomen when he would’ve followed her onto the bed. “I want to…” Leaving the sentence
unfinished, she knelt before him again, running her hands over his hips. The towel fell to the floor.

Taylor’s gasp made his entire body go taut. Her captivated expression destroyed any will he had to press her down onto the bed and just take her. He’d been afraid that the way she was rushing her exploration of sensuality would backfire into fear, but the look in her eyes was one of dazed discovery. His tough little Taylor was more than up to the challenge of facing her demons.

“Does it hurt?”

“No.” His voice sounded strangled to him. “Yes.” He contradicted himself. “It hurts good.”

“Oh.” She looked up, all big blue eyes, and he thought that maybe she was out of her depth.

“Cara,
let me…” he began. It was enough that she’d come this far. More than enough. He wanted to adore that body of hers and tell her without words just how much it meant to him that she was able to be so free with him.

Then she smiled, a soft woman smile that let him know she was perfectly happy to muddle her way through this…if he’d let her. Stunned, he stood there and let her.

Her gaze returned to that part of his body which declared his hunger. Reaching out, she clasped his erection in one slim hand, the action almost nervous. Jackson could feel his shoulder muscles screaming as he forced his body to remain still instead of thrusting as instinct dictated. He didn’t want to scare her and lose this precious moment of complete trust.

“Jackson?”

“Yeah?” he groaned.

“How hard can I squeeze?” The concern in her tone pulled him back from the beckoning edge. Though they’d made love countless times, he’d always been the one in control. This was a first for them. Holding her gaze, he reached down and clasped his hand around hers and squeezed.