Authors: Bianca L. Eugene
We danced our asses off. It was the first time that day I hadn’t thought about Cliff. Maybe it was Chanel, maybe it was the liquor. Whatever it was, I was enjoying myself.
I got caught up in my own world for a moment. I’d lost track of Chanel. When I turned to look for her, I saw she was grinding all up on some slender brother. She was putting it on him. When I got closer, I saw it was Jay. I figured if Jay was here, Cliff wasn’t too far behind.
My panties instantly got wet at the idea of him being here. I suppose my anger subsided because of his presence. I missed him. I looked around, but I didn’t see him.
“I’ma
go
to the bar.” I shouted to Chanel. She nodded as she continued to dance with Jay. I headed over to the bar and asked for an apple martini. I went into my purse to pay for the drink.
“No charge, baby. My man over there got it.”
I turned to the direction the bartender pointed. Sure enough, there was Cliff. He just nodded his head at me. He was looking so good.
He was wearing a pair of dark blue jeans, a cream button up shirt, and caramel colored Timberland boots. His hair looked so soft and wavy. His mustache and goatee were lined up nice and precisely. He was puffing on a cigarette looking so smooth.
I wanted to walk up to him and kiss him passionately, but, I didn’t want to give him too much power.
“Thank you for the drink.” I said nonchalantly.
“I had to do somethin’ to get your attention.
You lookin’ good, Ma.”
I couldn’t help but blush.
“Well thank you for the drink, but I can’t really talk to you, because I got a man.” I said with a smile.
“Fuck that nigga. He let you out the house wearing that dress too? He fuckin’ up, ‘
cause
if I was yo man I’d rip it right off you right now.”
He took his large hand and placed it on my waist before pulling me closer to him and pressing his manhood up against my body. My body began to shudder. He leaned down and whispered in my ear sending chills down my spine.
“I wanna take you somewhere. Tell Chanel you leaving with me. I’ma
be
in the car.”
He didn’t have to tell me twice. It only took a few minutes for me to find Chanel all booed up in the back of the club with Jay.
“I’m leaving with Cliff.”
“Okay.
Me
and Jay will get a cab home.”
We gave each other a quick hug.
“I’ll see you back at the house.” I shouted back before making a beeline for the exit. I went outside and saw Cliff’s truck outside across the street and headed towards it.
“I guess
they
letting anybody in the club tonight.” I heard. I turned around and Carmen was standing there with that stupid grin on her face.
It took everything in me not to slap the shit out of her ass.
I just rolled my eyes and continued to Cliff’s truck. I put on my cutest walk just for her.
Jealous ass.
I got up to the truck and saw Cliff’s head leaned back on the headrest. I looked closer inside and saw Ingrid with her head below his waist.
What the fuck!?
I began to beat on the window as hard as I could.
“Open the damn door!” I yelled.
Cliff was startled. He pushed her head away frantically before the door swung open, “Keisha, it’s not what you think.”
He was way too calm for my liking, I was seeing red. “Oh it ain’t what I think? That bitch wasn’t sucking your dick!?”
“Bitch!?
Who you calling a bitch?
You the bitch.
Step your game up-”
I didn’t let her finish her sentence, she’d already said enough. I punched her right in the mouth flooring her. As I went to do more damage, I felt someone scoop me up.
The next thing I knew, I was over Cliff’s shoulder kicking, biting, and swinging. He threw me in the backseat and peeled off. I could only cry out hysterically as he weaved through traffic.
“I’m going home, Cliff! I’m fucking going home. Fuck you!” I screamed at the top of my lungs as tears blurred my vision.
This whole trip was a bad idea. All it did was
show
me who Cliff really was. And it wasn’t someone I wanted to be with anymore. Cliff dipped in and out of traffic. My head was spinning and my heart was breaking all at the same time.
Chapter Twenty
He could go to Hell. I’d rather have had him do something like this when we were in Detroit. That way I’d at least be able to get away from him. I could go home, I could go to Missy’s, and I could even go to my mother’s house.
Here though? I was alone. I was completely alone. Alone in a fuckin’ truck with someone I thought I knew. There was no excuse for what he’d done to me. He’d put me in one of the worst situations I’d ever been in.
After a while I was emotionless. I had nothing in my heart and my soul ached. I just watched Cliff drive trying to explain himself. There was no explanation I was going to take at this point. He kept calling my name, but I wouldn’t respond. I couldn’t respond.
We were in a very unfamiliar neighborhood when the truck finally stopped. Cliff punched the steering wheel and shook his head.
“Come on.” He requested.
“No…” I said faintly.
“Keish, I ain’t got time for this shit-”
“Fuck you, Clifford! Don’t tell me what the fuck you got time for! I hate you!” I screamed.
“You don’t mean that-”
“Yes I do!” I said before opening the door. I stormed off knowing I had no idea where I was. I didn’t care.
“Keisha!” I heard after the car door slammed.
I stopped, fell to my knees, and threw up on the curb. Trying to regain my balance, I began to cry uncontrollably. I was losing it. I’d never felt this way before.
Out of nowhere, I felt Cliff’s large arms scoop me up. I wept as he carried me into what appeared to be a brownstone we were parked outside of.
Once inside, he laid me on a couch and began to look around the house. I wondered where I was as I heard water running in the distance.
“Come on, babe. Let’s go in the bathroom.” He said rubbing my leg.
“Don’t touch me, Clifford.” I moved away.
“I’m not playing’ with you, Keisha.
Get up-”
“You got some nerve talking to me like that after the shit you just pulled! Why you still talking to me anyway? Go be with that bitch, that’s who you want, right?”
Cliff began to shake his head and turned his back to me. Fuck him. He had no right to talk to me the way he was. You would’ve thought I was in the wrong, the way he was acting.
I used all the strength I had to stand up. I approached him and pulled his shoulder trying to get him to turn around. He looked me in the eyes expressionlessly.
“What, you ain’t got
nothing
to say?” I said putting my finger and his face, “Tell me to calm down now! Tell me to fuckin’ calm down now!”
He let out a sigh before picking me up like it was nothing and putting me back over his shoulder. I began to pound on his back angrily as he took me to the bathroom and ripped my clothes off before sliding me into the warm water.
It soothed me temporarily, but tears continued to stream down my face. Cliff sat down on the toilet seat slumping. I could see him looking at me out the corner of my eye.
“What?” I finally said.
“You think I’d do something ’foul like that?” He asked.
“You’re a liar. You’ve lied about everything.” I said wiping my eyes.
He sighed and leaned forward, “I’m not lying. I don’t fuck with that girl. I ain’t fucked with her since-”
“I’m not just talking about that. You never told me the truth about why you ended up in Detroit.” I said still not looking him in the eye, “I’m talking about you being someone completely different since you’ve been here.”
Cliff ran his hand down his beard and looked down, “Chanel told you?”
“Why do you hold so much back from me? Why it seem like you just…you have these parts of you that I don’t even know.”
“Fuck I’m supposed to tell you, Keish?”
“The truth, Clifford.
That’s all I want to know. That’s all I ever asked from you.”
“This dude used to beat my sister, you feel me?
My little sister.
Beyond that, it was like once she started
messin’ with dude, we stopped being close. The only time I’d hear from Carmen was when he’d beat her ass and she needed to come back home. Then when I’d tell her I’d set dude straight, she’d cry even more. She’d beg for me to just let it be.
“What am I gonna do? Ain’t much I can do when you livin’ with the same dude that’s beating you. You tryna be grown when you ain’t. Eventually it just boiled over. That’s my sister, Keisha. I told him straight up, I’d kill him if he laid another finger on her. I told Carmen she needed to move back home.
“Carmen acted like I was some random dude off the street. I guess that really gassed him up, because after that he started talkin’ ‘goon this’ ‘goon that’. We in the middle of Manhattan and you know I ain’t for all that slick talk so I chilled, so you pop off.
Fine.
But if I got that call again, he knew what it was gonna be.
“Prolly a week later I’m chillin’ at what I thought was a friend’s house. We bullshittin’, smokin’ a lil’ bit, whatever, whatever. At the time, ol’ boy say he gon’ call some girls through. I don’t really care, because I’m with Ingrid at the time, so I ain’t really interested. Jay with me though, so he like, ‘Send ‘em through’. All I remember was ol’ boy going to the door, sayin’, ‘Oh shit’ and these niggas in ski masks basically knockin’ the door off the hinges.
“I see dudes with guns so I grab mine and start blastin’ back. Jay ain’t really built for that-that’s my nigga, but that’s not what he do. So he run towards the fire escape and tell me to follow. It’s about three dudes so I’m backpedallin’, duckin’ and all types of shit tryna escape with him because I’m scared. You feel me? I’m scared as hell. I done had to bust my gun, but I’d never been that close to being killed.
“We made it out, and you know the streets talk. First, I find out that I killed one of them. Real talk, I was just bustin’ and trying to run so I didn’t know at the time I hit anybody. Second I find out that the Sean was related to one of them and the one I shot was his mans. Then I start hearing rumors the dude’s crib I was at knew about it all along.
“I had to stand a bullshit trial just for them to tell me it was self-defense. No shit. My mom had enough of my shit, which I understand now because I was out of control for real and she feared for my life. At the time I was real bitter though. She sent me with my Uncle out in Detroit.
“That’s the entire story.
The whole truth.
A couple of my dudes kinda put pressure on Sean afterwards and that nigga left town for Atlanta with one of Carmen’s homegirls.
Me
and Carm ain’t been the same since.” He explained.
I just began to finally wash up. I could tell by how he spoke that it was a situation that messed him up. I don’t even think it was about the incidents with Sean. It was really about Carmen.