Assassin (34 page)

Rain knew she had to do something to pull Case back from the old memories. She needed to remind Case that the past was over and she had a chance for a new life now. Only one thing came to mind.

"I love you, Cassandra."

Case looked up, startled at the use of her name and the words she'd never heard directed towards herself before. She tried to speak, but her throat was too tight. Rain continued as she took another tentative step forward to close the distance between them.

"I love you and no matter what you've done or what you ever do, that won't change," Rain promised. She caught Case's eyes again. "I've dreamed about what it would be like to lose you and I can't take that again. Never again."

Rain slowly reached up and brushed the tears from Case's cheeks. Case finally accepted the touch and closed her eyes for a moment to enjoy it. Then she opened her eyes and stared into Rain's with so much intensity that Rain actually stopped breathing in anticipation.

"I love you, Rebecca."

Case felt more tears come at finally saying those words out loud and letting Rain hear them. It felt wonderful just to say them, and the joy she saw on Rain's face made her feel so good inside. She wanted to be with Rain so much.

Too much. It would destroy her if she lost Rain. She couldn't take the risk of believing they had a chance together, only to be devastated when it all finally fell apart the way she knew it would. So, she did the only thing she could to keep herself safe. She pushed away her heart and clamped down on the feelings that threatened to overwhelm her if she gave them half the chance. There was nothing else she could do.

Case sighed in resignation as she gently disengaged from Rain and turned away.

"But it doesn't matter. We just weren't meant to be together," Case told the agent as she crossed her arms in a subconscious attempt to console herself.

Rain felt her heart stop beating as she stared at Case in shock. She couldn't move. She couldn't breathe. Nothing seemed real. A cold numbness was quickly sweeping through her body and the intellectual part of her mind recognized the beginnings of panic.

She'd been holding onto the fantasy that Case would stay with her. She'd believed that once they'd each told each other how they felt, they would naturally choose to be together. Forever. That was just how it was supposed to be.

But the reality was that Case truly intended to walk out of her life forever. Their love wasn't enough, and after tonight, she would never see Case again. The woman was just going to disappear and nothing Rain said or did would stop her.

In that instant of clarity, something inside Rain broke. She'd lost too much, seen too much death and pain. Anger exploded inside her and Rain suddenly screamed without thinking.

"NO!"

Case jumped and turned back around to find tears streaming down Rain's cheeks. Rain shook her head violently and began pacing as she continued to shout furiously.

"We were always meant to be together, damn it!" Rain yelled. She didn't know where her conviction came from, but she was sure it was true as she continued to speak without censoring herself. "We just keep fucking it up! And now you just wanna walk away?! Well, fuck you! I didn't come here to lose you, god damn it!" Rain paused as the pain in her chest made her gasp on a sob. "Please," she cried, and found she almost couldn't draw a breath to speak, so she whispered. "Don't leave me."

Rain felt like she'd been kicked in the stomach and she slowly went to her knees on the asphalt. Only the news of her brother's death had come close to causing her the kind of anguish she was experiencing right now. She swallowed to keep from throwing up and her voice was hollow when she spoke.

"I'd rather you just killed me," she requested.

Case stood in shock. It was the absolute dejection in Rain's voice that got through to her and made her move. She knelt down in front of Rain and pulled the sobbing woman into her arms and held her tightly. She kissed the top of Rain's head several times and suddenly felt a sense of relief to know that Rain was alive and in her arms. She never wanted to let go and she felt stupid for even considering a life without Rain. She finally allowed herself the briefest hope that they could actually work something out.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." Case's tears fell onto Rain's hair, but she smoothed them away. "I promise, we'll make it. Somehow, we'll find a way. I swear," Case promised from somewhere deep inside herself.

Rain nodded in acceptance and wrapped her arms around Case in return. They stayed like that for a long while, just rocking with each other as they held one another. Eventually though, Case pulled back again. She wiped at her tears as she spoke.

"I've dreamed about losing you, too. I did kill you, only I didn't mean to. I didn't want to, but everything happened so fast... And then tonight, I almost..." did it again.

Rain put her fingers to Case's lips.

"Shh. It's all right. You didn't kill me. It was just a dream," Rain said, more to convince herself than the assassin, as her own dream of killing Case played clearly in her mind's eye.

Case nodded slowly and hugged Rain a little tighter. She wished she could stop time and stay with Rain in that moment forever. She just never wanted to let go of the woman.

But it was only a few minutes later when Case's watch alarm informed her it was time for them to begin their vigil. A slow and tender kiss marked their parting to reaffirm their pledge to stay together. Then they went their separate ways to carry out Case's plan.

Rain took up a position that allowed her to watch the road, so that she could check off the license plate numbers from the notepad. Case moved to the other side of the building they were hiding behind in order to keep watch on the warehouse itself.

Half an hour before the meeting was supposed to begin, the first string of cars arrived. Case zoomed in with her high-powered lenses and tried to make out all of the people who exited the three cars. Case recognized the shortest man as a boss, second only to Antonio himself, while the two men on either side of him were his seconds.

Another two men took up posts leaning against one car each, while the only woman stood by the third car. Case knew the last three were the drivers and she had been counting on the woman's presence as the boss's favorite chauffeur. In fact, without her, Case would have been in trouble, and she breathed a small sigh of relief that everything had worked out so far.

A few minutes later, another string of cars arrived, and then another. Case watched as each group exited the cars and entered the building. She wondered what they were talking about, whether they'd started arguing with each other or were ignoring each other completely. She almost wished she'd set up listening devices so that she could hear what they were doing, but she knew it wasn't important to her goal, so she let it go.

Case continued to observe the latest arrivals through her binoculars as new groups showed up every few minutes.

CHAPTER 32

RAIN WATCHED THE road through her binoculars and placed a mark next to each of the license plate numbers she saw as the next string of cars went by. As the sun began to set and the time came closer and closer, she tried not to think about what she was helping Case to do, but her conscience was relentless.

There had to be a way for her to remain with Case without having to kill the leaders of the Carlotti organization. That wasn't what she'd been assigned to do, even if she was starting to think it might be justified. It wasn't her place to decide their punishment for breaking the law. If she'd wanted to do that job, she would have become a judge.

Carlotti was already dead, and there was nothing she could do about that. If she was being really honest with herself, there was nothing she wanted to do about that. But she was going to be responsible for the deaths of nearly six-dozen people, since by her count, for each boss that had been invited, they all seemed to be bringing two seconds and each of their drivers. Criminal or not, Rain didn't think she could allow herself to become a party to mass murder. If she went along with it on the grounds that they deserved it for the things they'd done, then she had to agree that Case deserved to die as well, and Rain didn't believe that was true.

She loved Case and she would stand by her through everything, but she couldn't justify so many deaths simply because she loved Case. Those were people in that building, and they were going to die if she did nothing.

As Rain continued to watch the road, she finally made her decision and entered the emergency number on her cell phone. It rang twice and then she heard the line pick up.

"Special Agent Dawson speaking."

"It's Rain. There's something big going down at the warehouse at the end of State Street in about half an hour."

"What's going on?" he asked.

Rain smiled wryly. She'd been asking that question all day.

"Just hurry up and send a team with a bomb squad," she ordered, and then hung up before he could protest.

Rain put the cell phone away and checked off the numbers she saw on the next few cars that passed her by. She didn't want to think she was betraying Case, but it was hard to look at what she'd done as anything else.

Rain sighed. The deed was done and she couldn't take it back now. She continued to mark off the cars that drove by until there was at least one for each boss. Then they stopped coming.

Rain heard Case walking over to her a couple minutes after the last set of cars had driven past and she looked up as she put the binoculars down.

"Let me see the notepad," Case requested, and Rain handed it to her.

Case scanned the list to double-check her own mental inventory and nodded her head.

"They're all here. The last ones just went inside," Case said, and turned to go back to the truck for the detonator.

Rain grabbed her wrist.

"Wait. You don't have to do this."

Case stopped and turned around to face her. The look on her face was patient, but not incredibly open. Rain went ahead anyway.

"You can testify against Carlotti's men and bring them to justice the right way. I know you don't trust the law; you've never been given much reason to, but trust me. I won't let anything happen to you."

"You're not the one I have to trust. You don't even have the power to make that kind of deal. And the kind of justice you're talking about is bullshit. It doesn't matter whether those guys are behind bars or not. As long as they're alive, they'll continue to run the organization. And then they'll know it was me and I'll end up with a death sentence."

"But we can protect you," Rain argued. "I'll personally see to it that you're kept safe from harm. I've had experience as a bodyguard and I know you can take care of yourself. Together, no one should be able to touch us," Rain said confidently.

"God, you just don't get it, do you?" Case said in exasperation. "I don't want to be on the run for the rest of my life, Rebecca, and I don't want you to have to look over your shoulder all the time either. But that's how it's going to be if I don't kill them now. You're just going to have to trust me on this one. I know these people better than anyone because I'm one of them, or at least I used to be," Case amended. "If someone double-crossed me the way I'm about to do these guys, I wouldn't rest until they were all dead. In fact, Antonio is a good example. He crossed me and now he'll never have the chance to cross me again. The men in that building knew what he was planning and went along with it, so as far as I'm concerned, they get everything Carlotti got. No loose ends. If I let those men live, they'll find out I killed Carlotti. And then if I testify, that'll be another dozen nails in my coffin. Not to mention yours. FBI agents aren't immune to having hits put out on them either. This is the only way to take care of all those problems once and for all. Can't you see that?"

"No. There's always another way," Rain protested.

"Not this time," Case replied quietly.

"I can't just stand aside and watch you kill..."

"Why not? You've been doing it for three years," Case interrupted her.

Rain paused in confusion.

"What are you talking about? I only met you a week ago."

"But you've been working for Carlotti for three years. You've killed people to protect his people. You've helped him sell drugs, kept him in power. You've done just about everything I have, but somehow it's okay because you weren't doing it for real. You could walk away at any time and just go back to your real life. But all the people he hurt, all the money he made... You were living off that money the same as the rest of us."

"I was undercover. I couldn't..." Rain began to protest.

"Oh, so it's all right because you were going to do something about Carlotti. How many people have died in the last three years, huh? How many women have been raped and killed? How many people have gotten addicted to the drugs he sold? How many cops have been killed? How many agents? How many kids have gone to bed each night knowing they're going to become part of the business, if they aren't already? How many people have lived in fear for the past three years because they didn't know if they were next on my list? How many people have been blackmailed and threatened each day just to keep their mouths shut or cough up some money for "protection"? All while you "gathered evidence." Did you ever do one damn thing to help those people?! Did it ever even occur to you? And now suddenly when it's all on the line, when it's all real, you want to tell me no?!"

Rain stood speechless. She wanted to argue, but her mind was a blank. Everything Case had said was true. She'd been so focused on putting a case together against Carlotti and his people that she'd never once considered any other alternatives. She'd grown up in the system believing it was the best and only way to do things, while Case had lived outside of the system, learning about its flaws firsthand, as she became one of its casualties.

"You can live in your goddamn fantasy, but it doesn't change a thing. Your cop friends can't come in here and just make it all better. If they could, they would have been able to stop Carlotti a long time ago, but that's not how the system works." Case sighed. "Maybe you can't take responsibility for the things you've done, but I am. These people aren't going to have a change of heart and I'm not going to let them live just so you and your friends can feel like you did the right thing. It's not the right thing, and maybe what I'm doing isn't right either, but at least they'll never be able to hurt anyone else again."