Always the Best Man (9 page)

“I understand, Noah.” She hated being put on the spot and the fact her brother was doing it. “Are you telling me to stay away from him?”

Noah shook his head. “You're coming off a bad divorce. I'm saying don't use Jase as a rebound fling. Both of you could end up hurt.”

Pushing off the wall, she spun toward him. “It's Jase you're worried about, not me.”

“Emily—”

“No. You don't know anything about my marriage.”

“Why is that?” He ran a hand through his hair. “How the hell am I supposed to understand anything about your life? You cut me out after Dad died.”

“That was mutual and you know it.”

“I thought we were doing better since Mom's illness?”

“We are, Noah. But it might be too soon for brotherly lectures on my private life.”

“Nothing is private in Crimson. You know that. Besides, I thought you came back to here to heal?”

“Maybe Jase is a part of me healing.” Until she said the words out loud, she hadn't realized how true they were. Tears sprang to the backs of her eyes and she swiped at her cheek, refusing to allow herself to break down. She'd promised herself she was finished with crying after she'd left Henry.

Noah cursed under his breath. “I'm sorry. Don't cry.”

“I'm not crying,” she whispered and her voice cracked.

“You really care about him.”

“We're friends. It's not a fling. Not a rebound. I don't know what is going on between us, but I'm not going to hurt him. I think...” She paused, forced herself to meet Noah's worried gaze. “I think I'm good for him. It goes both ways, Noah. I know it does.”

“Okay, honey.” Noah pulled her in for a tight hug. She resisted at first, holding on to her anger like an old friend. But her brother didn't let go, and after a few moments she sagged against him, understanding that even if he made her crazy, Noah was far better comfort than her temper could ever be.

“I'm sorry,” he whispered into her hair.

“You're a good friend to Jase.”

“But I need to be a better brother to you. You're important to me. You and Davey both.”

“You have to say that because I helped your bride pick out a wedding dress that will bring tears to your eyes.”

“I can't wait,” he said with a lopsided grin and a dopey look in his eyes that made her smile. “But I'm
choosing
to tell you the truth about supporting you more. I mean every word.”

“Then will you help me find my own place to live?”

“Mom loves having you at the farm.” He frowned. “She loves helping with Davey and having you close.”

“I'll still be close, but I want a home of my own, even if it's a tiny apartment somewhere. After the wedding will you help me look?”

“Of course.”

“Do you have any prewedding nerves?” she asked, stepping out of his embrace. “You spent a long time avoiding commitment.”

“I was a master,” he agreed.

“Marriage is a big deal, especially when there's a baby on the way.”

“I felt the baby kick the other night.”

“Oh, Noah.”

“It made this whole thing feel real. I mean, I know it's real but...yes, I'm nervous.” He looked over her shoulder toward the mountains in the distance. “Not about marrying Katie. I can't believe I was blind for so long, but now I've got her and I'm never letting go.” He took a breath, then said, “Even if I don't deserve her.”

“You do.” She nudged him with her hip. “You're a pain in my butt, but you deserve happiness.”

“What if I mess up? What if I can't be as good as Dad?”

“Don't compare yourself.” She gave a small laugh. “Do you think I could ever hold a candle to Mom?”

“You're an amazing mother.”

“You'll be an amazing dad.” She held up her hand, fist closed. “We've got this, bro.”

“Are you trying to be cool?”

She shrugged and lifted her hand higher. “Don't leave me hanging.”

With a laugh, Noah fist-bumped her, then pulled her in for another hug. “We'd better head back inside. I have a feeling Declan and Liam together are a dangerous combination.”

* * *

Jase's lungs burned as he ran the final stretch to the lookout point halfway up the main Crimson Mountain trail. At the top, he bent forward, sucking in the thin mountain air.

The late-afternoon trail run was supposed to clear his head, but his mind refused to slow down. Images of Emily and his dad swirled inside him, mixing with thoughts of the questions he'd answered at this morning's campaign breakfast.

How do you feel about Charles Thompson running against you?

Do you have too much going on to add mayor to your list of responsibilities?

When are you going to settle down and start a family?

Are you worried about not having time to take care of your dad?

What if Declan starts to drink again?

He'd answered each of the inquiries with a nod and an understanding smile, but he'd wanted to turn and run from the crowded church hall. Those questions brought up too many emotions inside him. Too much turmoil he couldn't control. Jase's greatest fear was losing control and it seemed he had less of a grasp on it with each passing day.

He sank down to one of the rock formations and watched as Liam Donovan came over the final ridge, a few minutes behind Jase. Liam's dark hair was stuck to his forehead and his athletic T-shirt plastered to his chest. The run up to the lookout point was almost three miles of vertical switchbacks. Jase had been running this trail since high school but today even the beauty of the forest hadn't settled him.

“Are you crazy?” Liam asked, panting even harder than Jase. “You were running like a mountain lion was chasing you.”

Jase wiped the back of one arm across his forehead. “A mountain lion would have caught you instead of me. I thought you wanted a challenge.”

“A challenge is different than a heart attack. You'd have a tough time explaining to Natalie that you left me on the side of the mountain.”

“I wouldn't have left you.” Jase grinned. “I'm too afraid of your wife.”

“The strange thing is she'd take that as a compliment.” He sat on a rock across from Jase. “You had a good turnout at the breakfast this morning.”

“I appreciate you stopping by.”

“Always happy to do my part with a plate of pancakes. Your dad is a character.”

Jase laughed. “That's one word for him.”

“He's really proud of you.” Liam used the hem of his shirt to wipe the sweat off his face. “My dad never gave a damn about anything I did. Not as long as I stayed out of his way.”

Liam's father owned one of the most successful tech companies in the world. It had been big news in the technology world when Liam broke off to start his own GPS software company and chose Crimson as the headquarters for it.

“I couldn't exactly stay out of Declan's way. I was too busy cleaning up behind him.”

“A fact your new opponent in the mayor's race is exploiting?”

Jase blew out a breath. “Sheriff Thompson has seen me at my lowest. He and my dad grew up together in town and the Thompsons and Crenshaws have always been rivals—sports, women, you name it.” He stood and paced to the edge of the ridge, taking in the view of the town below. “Anytime a situation involved my dad, Thompson made sure he was on the scene. Didn't matter if it was the weekend or who was on duty. The sheriff always showed up to personally cuff Dad.”

“Declan seems sincere about changing.”

“He's always sincere.” From up here, Jase could see downtown Crimson and the neighborhoods fanning out around it. The creek ran along the edge of downtown, then meandered through the valley and into the thick forest on the other side.

As a kid, he'd battled the expectations that he'd follow in his father's footsteps. People always seemed to be waiting for him to make a misstep, to become another casualty of the Crenshaw legend. He'd worked so hard to prove them wrong. When would he be released from the responsibility of making up for mistakes he hadn't made?

Liam came to stand next to him. “I know what it's like to have to claw your way out from a father's shadow. Our backgrounds are different, but disappointment and anger don't discriminate based on how much you have in the bank.”

“But you've escaped it.”

“Maybe,” Liam said with a shrug. “Maybe not. My dad is known all over the world. I've created a different future for myself but his legacy follows me. I choose to ignore it and live life on my terms.”

Jase wasn't sure if he'd even know how to go about setting up his own life away from the restrictions of his past. “When I graduated from law school, a firm in Denver offered me a position. I turned it down to come back to Crimson and take over Andrew Meyer's family practice.”

“Do you regret the choice you made?”

Jase picked up a flat stone from the trail and hurled it over the edge of the ridge. It arced out, then disappeared into the canopy of trees below. “I don't know. Back then, I was so determined to return to Crimson as a success. Part of it was feeling like I owed something to the people in this town. As much as they judged my family, they also came forward to take care of us when things were rough. After my mom left, we had food in the freezer for months.”

“Nothing says love in a small town like a casserole.”

“Exactly,” Jase agreed with a laugh. “There were a couple of teachers who looked after me at school. Once it became clear I was determined to stay on the straight and narrow, the town was generous with its support. I was given a partial scholarship during undergrad and always had a job waiting for me in the summer. I wanted to pay back that kindness, and dedicating myself to the town seemed like the best way to do it.”

“But...” Liam prompted.

“I've started to wonder what it would have been like to go to work, come home and take care of only myself. Maybe that's selfish—”

“It's not selfish.” Liam lobbed a rock over the side and it followed the same trajectory as Jase's. “It's also not too late. I was going to ask if you need support with the campaign. Financial support,” he clarified. “But now I'm wondering if becoming mayor is what you really want?”

“Does it matter? I've committed to it.”

“You can back out. Charles Thompson isn't a bad man. He would do a decent job.”

Jase cocked a brow.

“Not as good as you, of course. But the future of Crimson doesn't rest on your shoulders, Jase.”

“I'll think about that.” As if he could think about anything else. “We should head back down. I'll take it easy on you.”

Liam barked out a laugh. “A true gentleman.”

Jase started for the trail, then turned back. “Thanks for the offer, Liam. I appreciate it, but I don't want to owe you. Having you at my back is plenty of support.”

“I'd think of it as an investment,” Liam answered. “And the offer stands if you change your mind.”

“Thank you.” Jase started running, the descent more technical than climbing the switchbacks due to the loose rocks and late-afternoon shadows falling over the trail. It was just what he needed, something to concentrate on besides the emotional twists and turns of his current life.

Chapter Nine

M
onday morning, Emily jumped at the tap on her shoulder, spinning around in her desk chair to find Jase grinning at her.

She ripped the headphones off her ears. “You scared me half to death,” she said, wheezing in a breath.

“You were singing out loud.”

“You were supposed to be in court all day.” She narrowed her eyes.

“What exactly are you listening to?” He reached for the headphones, but she grabbed them, then spun around to hit the mute button on her keyboard.

“Music,” she mumbled. “Why are you back so early? I didn't hear the bells on the door when it opened.”

“I came in through the door to the alley out back.”

“You snuck up on me,” she grumbled.

“What kind of music? I didn't recognize it.”

“Broadway show tunes, okay?” She crossed her arms over her chest and glared. “
Evita
to be specific. I like musicals.” The words came out like a challenge. “You're a lawyer—sue me.”

His grin widened. “Don't cry for me, Emily Whitaker.”

“Asking for trouble, Jase Crenshaw.”

He held up a brown paper bag. “Here's a peace offering. I brought lunch from the deli around the corner. That's why I came through the back. Have you eaten?”

She held up an empty granola-bar wrapper. “I'm working through lunch since I'm leaving early today.” Tomorrow was Davey's first day of kindergarten so tonight they were going to the ice cream social at the elementary school. Her son didn't seem worried about the change, but Emily had been a bundle of nerves since the moment she'd woken up this morning.

She'd had a meeting at the beginning of the week with the kindergarten teacher and the school's interventionist to discuss the Asperger's and how to help Davey have a successful school year. For a small school district, Crimson Elementary School offered many special education services. This would mark the first time he'd been away from her during the day.

She'd enrolled him in preschool in their Boston neighborhood, having added Davey's name to the exclusive program's wait list when he was only a few months old. Despite the expense of the private program, the teachers had been unwilling to work with his personality quirks.

Much like her husband, they'd expected him to manage like the rest of the children, which led to several frustrated tantrums. Davey had lashed out, throwing a toy car across the room. It had hit one of the other students on the side of the head and the girl had stumbled, then fallen, knocking her head on the corner of a bookshelf. There'd been angry calls from both the teacher and the girl's mother and even a parent meeting at the school to allay other families' concerns about Davey continuing in the program.

Henry had been furious, mostly because two of his partners had kids enrolled at the school so he couldn't brush the incident under the rug. In the end, Emily had pulled Davey, opting to work with him herself on the skills he'd needed to be ready for kindergarten.

She couldn't control the way Asperger's affected his personality and his ability to socialize with both adults and other kids. Or how he was treated by people who didn't understand how special he was.

“Come to the conference room and eat a real lunch,” Jase said gently, as if he could sense the anxiety tumbling through her like rocks skidding down the side of Crimson Mountain.

“I have work to do.”

“Em, you are the most efficient person I've ever met. You've already organized this whole office, updated the billing system, caught up on all my outstanding correspondence and done such a great job of editing the briefs that Judge McIlwain at the courthouse actually commented on it.”

Pride, unfamiliar and precious, bloomed in her chest. “He did?”

“Yes, and he's not the only one.” Jase rested his hip against the corner of her desk. “Do you remember the contract you drafted for the firm I'm working with over in Aspen?”

She nodded.

“The office manager called to see if I'd used a service to hire my new assistant. She wanted to find someone just like you for their senior partner. He's a stickler for detail and notoriously hard on office staff.”

“She called me, too.” Emily swallowed.

“Why?” Jase's tone was suspiciously even.

“To offer me a job.”

“What was the starting salary?”

She told him the number, almost double what he was paying her.

Jase cursed under his breath. “Why didn't you take it? It's one of the most prestigious firms in the state.”

“I know. I researched them.”

“They can offer you benefits and an actual career path. You have to consider it, even if it makes me mad as hell hearing someone tried to poach you.”

She shook her head. “I don't want to work in Aspen. I like it here with you.” She flashed what she hoped was a teasing smile. “You'd be lost without me.”

His brown eyes were serious when he replied, “You have no idea.”

“Jase...”

“At least let me feed you. I've been thinking of ideas for the prewedding scavenger hunt.”

She stood at the same time he did, too shocked to protest any longer. “You have?”

He looked confused. “Wasn't that the plan?”

“Well, yes,” she admitted as she followed him to the conference room at the far end of the hall. “But I wasn't sure you'd take it seriously. You have so much going on, and it's a silly party theme.”

There was an ancient table in the middle of the conference room, with eight chairs surrounding it. On her second day in the office, Emily had taken wood soap and furniture wax to the dull surface, polishing it until it gleamed a rich mahogany. She liked that she could make a difference here in Jase's small law practice.

He held out a chair for her and she sat, watching as he emptied the contents of the bag. He set a wax-paper-wrapped sandwich in front of her, along with a bag of barbecue potato chips. “Noah is my best friend. Making his wedding weekend special isn't silly, and neither was your idea. You need to give yourself more credit.”

She nodded but didn't meet his gaze, running one finger over the seam of the wax paper. “What kind of sandwich?”

“Turkey and avocado on wheat,” he answered absently. “Do you want a soda?”

“Diet, please,” she said, unable to take her hand off the sandwich.

He left the room and Emily sucked in a breath. He remembered her favorite sandwich.

The small gesture leveled her, and the barriers she'd placed around her heart collapsed. This man who was wrong for her in every way except the one that mattered. He seemed to want her just the way she was. Her ex-husband would have brought her a salad, forever concerned she might not remain a perfect size six.

Perfect.

Her life since returning to her hometown had been anything but perfect, yet she wouldn't trade the journey that had brought her here. She was a better person for her independence and the effort she'd put into protecting Davey from any more suffering and rejection.

* * *

She did her best to gather her strength as she pulled up to the elementary school parking lot later that evening. The playground and grassy field in front of the building were crowded with people, and she wished she'd gotten to the event earlier.

Instead she'd changed clothes several times before she and Davey left her mother's house. Difficult to find an outfit that conveyed all the things she needed.

I'm a good mother. Like me. Like my son. Accept us here so I can make it a true home.

Straightening her simple A-line skirt, she got out of the SUV and helped Davey hop down from his booster seat. The desire to gather him close almost overwhelmed her. She wanted to ground herself to him with touch but knew that would only make him anxious. She dropped the car keys into her purse and gave him a bright smile. “Are you ready to meet your new teacher?”

His eyes shifted to hers, then back to the front of the school. “Okay,” he mumbled and emotion knitted her throat closed.

“Okay,” she repeated and moved slowly toward the playground. Several women looked over as they approached, and she recognized a couple who'd been in her grade. They waved and she forced herself to breathe. If she panicked, Davey was likely to pick up on her energy. Already she could feel him dragging his feet behind her.

“We've got this,” she said, glancing back at him.

He crossed his arms over his chest and stared at the ground.

Emily's heart sank but she kept the smile on her face. All she wanted was to protect her sweet boy, but so often she didn't know how to help him.

Suddenly she heard a female voice calling her name. She looked up to see a tiny woman with a wavy blond bob coming toward her.

“I hoped you'd be here,” Millie Travers said as she wrapped Emily in a tight hug. Millie was a recent addition to the community, having moved to town last year to be close to her sister Olivia. Both sisters were married to Crimson natives. Millie's husband, Jake Travers, was a doctor at the local hospital and Emily knew he had a daughter from a previous relationship who was around Davey's age.

Emily had met Millie, along with Katie's other girlfriends, at a breakfast Katie had coordinated shortly after her engagement. Her future sister-in-law was doing her best to make sure Emily felt included in her circle of friends, which she appreciated even if it was difficult for her to trust the bonds of new friendships after her experience in Boston. But she couldn't deny Millie was an easy person to like. “Katie told me to look out for you,” the other woman said with a smile. “Your son is starting kindergarten this year, right?”

Emily swallowed. “Yes.” She turned to where Davey stood stiff as a statue behind her. “Davey, this is Mrs. Travers, a friend of mine.”

Her son stared at the crack in the sidewalk. Around the dull roar in her head, Emily heard the sound of laughter and happy shouts from the other kids on the playground. She wondered if Davey would ever be able to take part in such carefree fun.

If Millie was bothered by Davey's demeanor, she didn't show it. Instead, she sank down to her knees but kept her gaze on the edge of the sidewalk. “It's nice to meet you. My stepdaughter, Brooke, is starting first grade this year. She can answer any questions you have about kindergarten. Mrs. MacDonald, the kindergarten teacher, is really great.”

“Whatcha doin', Mama-llama?” A young girl threw her arms around Millie's neck and leaned over her shoulder. Emily saw Davey's eyes widen. The girl wore a yellow polka-dot T-shirt and a ruffled turquoise skirt with bright pink cowboy boots. Her blond curls were wild around her head.

“I'm talking to my new friend, Davey,” Millie said, squeezing the small hands wrapped around her neck. “He's starting kindergarten this year.”

Brooke stood up and jabbed a thumb at her own chest. “I'm an expert on kindergarten.” She stepped around Millie and held out a hand. “Ms. MacDonald has a gecko in her room.”

“I have a question,” Davey said quietly.

Brooke waited, reminding Emily a bit of Noah's puppy. Finally she asked, “What's your question?”

“Is it a crested gecko or a leopard gecko?”

“It's a leopard gecko and his name is Speedy,” Brooke told him. “Come on. I'll take you to see the classroom.”

Millie straightened, placing a gentle hand on Brooke's curls. “We need to make sure it's okay with Davey's mommy.”

Emily was about to make an excuse for why Davey should stay with her when he slipped his hand into Brooke's. The girl didn't seem bothered by his rigid shoulders or the fact he continued to stare at the ground.

“I'll go, Mommy,” Davey said softly.

Emily opened her mouth, but only a choked sob came out. Biting down hard on the inside of her cheek, she gave a jerky nod.

“We'll be right behind you,” Millie said, moving to Emily's side and placing an arm around her waist. “Go slow, Brookie-cookie. Show Davey the room and we'll meet you there so both Davey and his mommy can meet Ms. MacDonald.”

“Okeydokey,” Brooke sang out and led Davey through the crowd.

“Do you need a minute?” Millie asked gently.

Emily shook her head but placed a palm to her chest, her heart beating at a furious pace. “He doesn't usually...” She broke off, not sure how to explain what an extraordinary moment that had been for her son.

“Brooke will take care of him.” Millie smiled. “He's going to be fine here. I know you don't have any reason to believe me, but something in this town rises up to meet the people who need the most help.”

“I've never been great at taking help,” Emily said with a shaky laugh. “I'm more a ‘spit in your eye' type person.”

“That's not what I hear from Katie. She's a very good judge of people. We'll follow them.” Millie led her along the edge of the crowd, smiling and waving to a number of people as they went. But she didn't stop so Emily was able to keep Brooke and Davey within her sight. Millie's smile widened as she looked over Emily's shoulder. “And she's not the only one.”

Emily turned to see a tall, blond, built man she recognized as Dr. Jake Travers, Millie's husband, walking through the parking lot with Jase at his side. Jase was a couple inches taller than Jake and his crisp button-down shirt and tailored slacks highlighted his broad shoulders and lean waist. Her heart gave a little leap and she smiled before she could stop herself.

“My husband is the hottest guy in town,” Millie said, nudging Emily in the ribs. “But soon-to-be Mayor Crenshaw holds his own in the looks department. Wouldn't you agree?”

Emily shifted her gaze to Millie's wide grin and made her expression neutral. “He's my boss,” she murmured.

The other woman only laughed. “I was Brooke's nanny when I first came to Crimson. That didn't stop me from noticing my
boss
.” She gently knocked into Emily again. “Don't bother to deny it. Your game face isn't that good.”