Alexander Ranch (16 page)

“What about it?”

“You’re not angry with me?”

“No, Jordan, I’m not. Confused maybe, but not mad.”

“What are you confused about?”
His forehead crinkled in a frown. “And don’t say you thought I didn’t like you again. I have assured you repeatedly I do.”

“Well, until recently you barely seemed to be able to stand being around me. There is a reason I got the distinct impression you didn’t really like me much. Then, within days, you went from being friendly to – to kissing me,” I tried to control my voice which had bee
n rising in pitched with frustration and my arms and hands where gesturing wildly, “I don’t understand you.”

“I’m not sure I understand myself,” he chuckled and stuck his hands in his pockets, sucked in a deep breath and let it out. “I never disliked you though. I’m sorry for giving you that impression.”

We were at the barn door now and he stopped. I stopped too and faced him.

“You really never tried to read my mind or feelings, or whatever you do?” He was looking at me with narrowed eyes and I looked away.

“I tried to get a glimpse of your feelings,” I told the truth, but didn’t meet his gaze.

“And?”

“And, all I could tell was that you were conflicted. I assumed you were conflicted about hating me.”

Out of the corner of my eye I could see him bending down peering at me to get my attention. He waited for me to look up at him before he spoke.

“Listen to me. I do not and never have disliked you or hated you,” he said looking seriously into my eyes.

“Ok. I believe you,” I whispered back holding his gaze.

Cervantes whinnied and I looked over at him. He was sticking his head over the stall door and watching me, wanting his treat no doubt. I walked inside the barn, leaving Jordan at the door. I could hear him following me. I couldn’t help looking around to make sure no one was lurking in the darkened corners of the barn, but otherwise I ignored the feelings that the barn triggered. I did not want to relive the last time I was here. I walked over to Cervantes and rubbed his muzzle.

“Demanding this morning aren’t you,” I crooned to the horse. He snorted and began nudging me.

“You don’t really believe me, do you?” Jordan asked.

I turned to face him again, “Yes, I do believe you, Jordan. Daisy told me that you didn’t dislike me you were just concerned with hurting me.”

“You discussed me with Daisy?” he seemed pleased by this. He had a cautious smile on his face, but it was a smile.

“Well, I wouldn’t say discussed. It was just a question,” I busied myself rubbing Cervantes’ head and neck, avoiding Jordan’s eyes.

“What else did Daisy say?”

“Nothing? When I asked her to explain she said I would have to ask you to explain it.” Now, I did look at him. And, I thought a surprised and then wary expression came over his face.

“Well?”

“Well, she’s right as usual,” he mumbled
. “You know I’m not a healer like she and Grace are.”

“Yes.”

“I’m a drainer, Lela, like the man who attacked you.” His voice was even, but there was a stiffness about him that betrayed he wasn’t as relaxed as he seemed.

“You are nothing like that man, Jordan
,” I stated firmly. “I don’t believe you would ever attack me or anyone. That makes no sense. Are you trying to tell me all drainers have homicidal or, uh, other criminal tendencies? I don’t believe that.”

“No, I’m not saying that. And, I appreciate your belief in me,” He smiled ruefully.

“Then, what does your being a drainer have to do with it?” I petted Cervantes some more but continued to look directly at Jordan. It was tricky keeping my attention on both of the males demanding it at the moment, but I managed. Jordan was looking decidedly uncomfortable. He cleared his throat.

“I kissed you this morning because I am attracted to you, Lela.”

Now it was my turn to look uncomfortable. I could feel my face flush, but I did not turn away. I continued to hold his gaze and nodded. “I kind of figured that out this morning.”

“I’ve never,” he paused as if choosing his words carefully, “kissed a human who was not either a healer or a drainer like myself.”

I guess that wasn’t surprising, but I couldn’t figure out where he was going with this.

“I’ve never actually been attracted to anyone that was, well, not one of my kind or a healer, probably because I’ve never really spent time with regular people,” he said going on a tangent. When I said nothing, just waited, he continued, “You see
, Lela, as you know we need the life force of other living things in order to survive.”

“But, I thought you told me you don’t go around hurting or killing people?” I said evenly. I was surprisingly unafraid.

“I don’t. I don’t put myself around normal people to even be tempted,” he explained seeming agitated now. “But, from all that I have heard, the majority of actual people that drainers kill are killed during intimate encounters. From what I’ve been told, the life force of a regular human is very appealing to us. And, once touched, we begin to crave it.”

“You’re saying it’s like a drug? You become addicted?”

“Not exactly.”

“Then, what? I want to understand. You’re saying you form some sort of attraction to a life force, or whatever, which could turn you unwillingly into a killer?”

“Possibly. But, that’s not exactly the way I’ve heard it described. And, I’ve never even felt a regular human life force so, I’ve no idea how I would react.”

“Tell me what you heard then, Jordan,” I gritted my teeth. It seemed that he was trying purposely to be vague and confusing.

“I’ve been told that it is more like the most intense of orgasms.”

That ungritted my teeth. My mouth fell open and I promptly closed it. He went on.

“I’ve heard that the pleasure is so intense, especially during intimate situations, that one wouldn’t have any desire
not
to drain the life force of the other. So, whether or not doing it is possible under such circumstances, I’ve never met anyone who tried not to. Those of us who don’t go around killing people just don’t ever put ourselves in the position to find out.”

“But – but, Logan and Grace…,” I sputtered.

“Grace is a healer. Healers can protect themselves from drainers. Though, we weren’t sure if they could without their guard being up until, well, Grace and Logan are the only drainer healer couple we know of.”

“But, you didn’t try…, I mean, nothing happened when you kissed me?”

“No, it didn’t. Though, I wasn’t sure if it was something that would just happen without my trying or not. I wasn’t thinking when I did that. I just wanted to kiss you. I acted impulsively,” he said stepping closer to me, “It’s nice to know I can kiss you without hurting you.”

“Hm,” was all I could say.

He sighed, “I guess we should clear the air and talk about that too. As I said, I hadn’t planned to kiss you. I did it before I knew it. Did I frighten you?”

“No.”

“Did I make a mistake in doing so?”

“No. It’s alright
…, the kiss I mean.”

“Just alright?”

“I mean no harm done, though we probably shouldn’t do it again.” My voice was sounding like a dry croak. He was too close to me now and I could smell his body wash. It was the same one I used when I used his shower the day before.

“I agree. Only, I’m not sure if I can stop myself from doing it again.” His voice had taken on a low, husky timbre.

“I’m not sure I’m ready for that,” I blurted out quickly, my voice now having a breathless quality. I darted a look around as if to find a way of escape. He put a finger gently under my chin and tilted my face to meet his.

“I’m not sure I’m ready for it either,” he whispered across my lips just before his mouth covered mine for the second time this morning. I did not resist. In fact, against my better judgment, I didn’t hesitate to participate despite the warning bells going off in my head.  He put his arms around me this time and pulled me closer, gently but deftly, deepening the kiss. He explored and teased and I could hear the harshness of my own breathing. Unable to pull away, I came to an agreement with myself that this would be the last one. No sense in interrupting something so toe curlingly delicious. His mouth was so warm and gentle, yet urgent on mine. Yes, there would be time afterwards to reset the ground rules and clearly mark the boundaries. With that last thought in mind I gave in to the intensely intoxicating experience of Jordan’s kiss.

Feeling me completely yield in his arms, he backed me against a stall door and pulled me even closer with one arm around my waist and a hand at the back of my neck. I was willingly drowning in the dizzying kiss. I could not have resisted the power of his draw if I’d wanted to.

I might not care now
, but if I didn’t stop this my self-control would desert me, and I would be a slave to his pull.

Chapter 21

A muffled moan reached my ears. Had it come from me?

Suddenly Jordan was ripped away from me. I stood blinking in surprise trying to figure out what had happened. I thought he’d leapt away from me realizing the danger of this all-consuming kiss. Perhaps he too sensed that this was not an attraction that would easily be broken if we did not pull away from it now. Then something crashed into the opposite stall door and a form materialized in front of me.

It was Jordan who had crashed into the stall door opposite me. The door had splintered on impact and he crashed to the ground. Just as quickly he was now standing and snarling in a fighting stance. Ethan had materialized in front of me. He too was crouching but in a defensive stance, as if protecting me.

“Are you ok?” Ethan asked gruffly over his shoulder at me, not daring to take his eyes off of Jordan. Jordan stood erect now, no longer ready to attack, but his eyes blazed with fury.

“I’m fine, Ethan, really,” I yelped, huddling against Cervantes door. I could hear him pawing the ground in response to the disturbing energy filling the room. I realized that Ethan thought that Jordan might have succumbed to the desire of my life force or something. “He wasn’t hurting me Ethan. I’m perfectly fine.”

“Of course I wasn’t hurting her!” Jordan roared.

After a tense moment
Ethan straightened, turned so that he could see us both and then looked back and forth from Jordan to me. The confusion in his face cleared followed by understanding.

“Oh,” came his soft reply and Jordan stormed out of the barn. Ethan watched him go and then turned to me. His face took on an apologetic expression, “I’m sorry. I thought – ”

“I know what you thought,” I cut him off feeling awkward.

“Hey,” he frowned, “Stay out of my head.”

“I wasn’t in your head,” I hissed in near hysterics and embarrassment. I felt like I’d had too much caffeine after that kiss. This jittery feeling mixed with embarrassment had me practically twitching. I took a deep breath and then continued, “I didn’t need to try and read your feelings or thoughts to know what you were thinking. Jordan knows too.”

“You don’t feel any light headedness, pain or fatigue?”

“No Ethan. He wasn’t hurting me or trying to touch my life force or whatever,” I said, feeling myself flush all over now in mortification.

“Hm…, well damn.”

“What are you damning about?”

“I didn’t think he would act, he was so afraid of hurting you.”

“He told you, he...was… wanted – What did he tell you?”

“He didn’t. I told him. But, he wouldn’t admit it. I told him if he waited any longer to act then I would.” He grinned at my look of surprise, “Don’t look so surprised. You have to know how sexy you are. And, I know firsthand how men fall all over themselves trying to get your attention.”

“No they do not,” I protested.

“Yes they do. I watch them every time I’m out anywhere with you,” he shot back with a sly grin. Then he cocked his head to the side, “I thought you were just ignoring them out of courtesy for me. But, with that blush and look on your face, I’m starting to think you really don’t notice.”

“Ethan, stop. I can’t take your teasing right now.”

“I’m not teasing, sweetheart,” he shook his head earnestly. Then he sighed, “I guess I better go make nice with Jordan then. He’s probably really pissed right now.”

He stuck his head out of the barn and looked around. Then he stepped out waving his arms, “Daisy!”

Daisy appeared moments later sounding concerned, “I thought I heard a big crash coming from here. Is everything ok?”

“Fine. I just pissed Jordan off. Do you mind staying with Lela so I can go make nice with Jordan?”

“Sh-sure,” she said perplexed.

With that, Ethan took off after Jordan without another word, leaving me to explain to Daisy what had happened. After I explained, Daisy was laughing and I was blushing. I sure hope this wasn’t going to become a habit. I usually wasn’t prone to blushing.  Then again, I usually wasn’t involved in such public displays of affection.

“It’s not funny, Daisy,” I said giving her a mild shove when she wouldn’t stop laughing.