A Family for the Holidays (15 page)

Jake stood before Mrs. Hollingsworth. “Are you certain there was nothing of Lily's that was saved?”

“Nothing. I'm sorry. The fire started on the second floor, near her room. Everything is gone. There's nothing left.”

“We should go,” Lily said. She'd resumed her perch on one of the chairs set in the snow. “Mrs. Hollingsworth is right. There's nothing left for me here.”

Dozens of words of comfort balanced on the tip of his tongue, but they were all inadequate. Lily had lost her home. She'd lost her possessions. She'd lost her plans for the future.

He wrapped his arm around Lily's back and urged her upright. As though in a daze, she stumbled beside him.

Jake paused out of earshot of the children. “Is there anyone else?”

“What do you mean?”

“Is there anyplace else you can stay? Do you have any family?”

“Nothing. No one. This was... This house... I have nothing.”

He'd taken his family for granted over the years. Though he sometimes went months without speaking to his brothers and sisters, they were always there. He always had the sure knowledge of their assistance if he was ever in trouble.

Losing their mother had shattered them in the beginning, but they had healed together. Those bonds were stronger than he'd ever realized. Lily was alone and adrift. She'd survived in solitude.

He assisted her into the wagon once more. Sam and Peter took their places beside them. Jake gave the driver instructions to the nearest hotel, but Lily interrupted.

“No. First we have to see Judge Ashford. Sam and Peter deserve answers. They deserve to know their future. They are the first priority.”

Unwilling to argue, Jake gave the driver the new instructions. He'd contact his superiors as soon as they finished. In St. Joseph, he was beyond the reach of Sheriff Koepke. Though he'd initially been reluctant to give up the character he'd invented for his job, he desperately wanted proof of his real identity for Lily. She trusted him, but he was tired of playing the gunfighter.

He'd created dozens of characters over the years in the name of his job. They were all excuses. Under the guise of enforcing the law, he'd been hiding from his guilt and pain. While the truth was humbling, this was neither the time nor the place for personal revelations.

His own problem could wait.

Lily needed a sense of purpose, and seeing to the children's future gave her that purpose. At least temporarily. He understood her desire well enough. She'd lost control. She'd lost her moorings. She was searching for a problem that had a solution. Lily Winter was nothing if not practical.

The St. Joseph courthouse was a redbrick building that appeared newly built. The color of the bricks had yet to mellow with age and time. Enormous white columns supported a vast overhang, and giant double doors led inside.

Lily directed them through the cavernous foyer and led them down a corridor.

Sam and Peter paused.

Lily turned around. “What's wrong?”

“Will the judge send us to the orphanage?” Sam asked.

“No,” she assured them. “I won't let him.”

“Then why are we here?” Sam asked.

“We have to do things correctly. We need the paperwork in order. If someone challenges... If someone tries... We have to keep everything legal. The judge may have a clue to your grandfather's location, as well. If Emil returns to Frozen Oaks and discovers you're gone, he'll contact the judge first.”

“You're certain that judge won't send us to the children's home?” Peter asked. “I want to stay with Sam.”

She paused and her mouth worked. She wouldn't make promises she couldn't keep, and her despair was evident. How did he tell her that she had an unexpected ally? Jake's influence stretched beyond the US marshals. He'd made powerful friends over the course of his career. He'd been saving up favors, and now was the time to cash in those favors.

“You won't be separated,” he said.

Though he wasn't as familiar with St. Joseph, he had contacts in Kansas City that owed him. He'd tap into the web of backroom deals and secret alliances. Whatever happened, he'd keep them together.

Men in suits carrying batches of paper scurried to and fro. The whole building smelled of ink and paper and tobacco smoke. For the first time since leaving Frozen Oaks, Jake breathed easier, though Lily kept darting him worried glances, unaware that he was in no danger from the law here.

They waited only a few minutes before Lily spotted the judge returning to his chambers between sessions. Though clearly surprised to see Lily, he motioned them toward a door with a placard bearing his name. He hung his dark robes on a wrought-iron coat tree and invited them to sit in his luxuriously appointed office.

The judge pulled two more chairs before his desk and gestured for the children to take a seat, as well. Jake considered the gesture a good sign. The judge clearly had the interests of the children at the forefront of his mind.

Jake took Lily's hand and gave her fingers a squeeze. “Don't worry.”

Judge Ashford rested his elbows on the ink blotter protecting his polished oak desk. “I didn't expect to see you three back again.”

Lily gave a brief summary of the past several days. She glossed over the jailbreak and Jake's fabricated identity, mentioning only that she was suspicious of Vic's motivation for assuming guardianship of the children.

When she finished, the judge rubbed his chin. “That's highly irregular. I commend your instincts, Miss Winter.”

“Then Mr. Skaar hasn't contacted you? And you haven't heard from Emil?” Jake asked.

“No. I've heard nothing from Frozen Oaks. I haven't heard from Emil since the last telegram.” He opened a drawer at his knee and riffled through the files. He set a folder on his desk. “This is the last correspondence I received from Emil Tyler.”

He slid an envelope across the desk and Jake quickly scanned the contents. Lily accepted the letter and read through the pages, as well. Nothing in the letter gave any indication as to why he'd disappeared or where he might have gone.

“I'm sorry, folks,” Judge Ashford said. “I can't tell you anything more. That's all I know.”

Lily cleared her throat. “What will happen to the Tyler children?”

The judge shuffled the papers on his desk, a frown knitting his dark brows together. “There's no one else to take them in, I'm afraid. Emil Tyler was our best hope at reuniting them with family.”

“Surely there's someone else? An uncle or an aunt? A second cousin.”

“We looked at all those possibilities before. Sending the children to an elderly man who lived in the middle of nowhere wasn't exactly my first choice.” The judge fanned through more of his paperwork. “We can place them with the Sisters of Mercy. If Emil isn't located within the next six months, they'll be put up for adoption.”

Lily half rose from her chair. “No!”

Jake placed a restraining hand on her arm. “I won't let that happen. I promise you.” He reached for Sam's and Peter's hands. “I promise all of you. You'll stay together.”

The judge gave a sad shake of his head. “I can't guarantee the children will be placed together, but I can add a note in the files. They seem healthy. They shouldn't have too much trouble finding a placement.”

“They can stay with me,” Lily said.

The judge set down his sheaf of papers. “You live with your family, then? Parents?”

“No. I'm, uh, I'm between living arrangements now.”

“You must understand my difficulty.” The judge leaned back in his chair. “I was reluctant to let you chaperone the Tyler children in the beginning. You've proved yourself more than capable of the task. Considering everything you've been through the past few days, the children were fortunate for your care. But I can't grant guardianship, even temporary guardianship, to a single woman without a home. Our goal is to place the children in a secure situation with families.”

Lily hung her head. “I understand.”

Sam and Peter appeared stricken.

“Marry me,” Jake blurted.

Chapter Thirteen

L
ily gaped. “Did you just propose marriage?”

“If we're married,” Jake said, directing his speech toward the judge, “we can be guardians for the children, right?”

“The circumstances are highly unusual.” The judge rested his palms on his ink blotter. “But I'm inclined to make an exception given the circumstances. If you went through the proper channels and applied to adopt the children, we'd give your request every consideration. I don't see why we can't accelerate the process. Especially taking into account your previous relationship with each other and the children.”

The implications of his words left her temporarily speechless.

“Think about what you're saying.” Lily frantically considered the ramifications. “What happens if Emil is never located? What happens if he's unable to return?”

The unsaid words hovered in the air between them. What if Emil hadn't gone into hiding—what if he was dead? Lily glanced between the two men. She was dazed from seeing the boardinghouse in ruins. A gunfighter she'd known for less than a week had just proposed marriage, and she couldn't find anything wrong with the idea. Certainly there was something wrong with this solution.

“What's your situation, mister?” the judge inquired. “I didn't catch your name.”

“Jake Elder.”

“Any relationship to John Elder?”

“He's my uncle.”

“That clears up the rest of my doubts.” The judge scratched his temple. “I worked with John on a train robbery case some years back. When you've been around as long as I have, you get to know most of the men breaking the law, and most of the men enforcing the law.”

Lily tilted her head. John Elder must be on the right side of the law given the judge's obvious admiration. Was Jake lying about the relationship, or was he simply the black sheep of the family?

“I have loads of family,” Jake said. “Sam and Peter will always have a home.”

The judge looked between the two of them, folded his sheaf of papers and stuck them beneath one elbow. “Why don't you two step out into the corridor and sort this out?”

He gave a pointed look at the children, who were avidly following the conversation.

Lily glanced at Sam and Peter and nodded. The children's future hung in the balance. They shouldn't be speaking of them as though they were chattel.

“Don't worry.” She gently tugged on Sam's braid. “We'll sort this out.”

The idea was not without merit. She had no ties to anything or anyone except the children. She had nothing; therefore she had nothing left to lose. The idea was oddly liberating. She simply wasn't certain that Jake understood the entire scope of his proposal. He'd have to leave his old life behind and start over.

“Do you realize what you're saying?” She followed him into the corridor and paced the narrow space. “We have to think about their future. A permanent future.”

“I am.”

Lily rubbed her forehead. How had such a simple task turned into her entire future? A few weeks ago her life had taken a sudden turn. She didn't regret caring for the children. Though she'd only known them a short time, they were banded together. Someone else might have walked away and left them in Frozen Oaks with Vic Skaar.

“Can you make a home here?” she asked. “With your, you know, reputation?”

“I have an uncle,” Jake said. “In Kansas.”

“John Elder?”

“A different uncle. Jack Elder.”

At least their names lined up. She snorted softly. They all began with the same letter. “Where in Kansas?”

“A place called Cimarron Springs. Just south of here. Near the border. No one will look for us there.”

What other options did they have? The judge had made his stance clear. He'd put the children in an orphanage rather than hand them over to her care.

For once Lily sympathized with Sam's complaints about being a girl. As much as she'd like to rail against the judge, she had nothing to offer the children. She had the clothing on her back and a couple hundred dollars. Even if she planned on keeping them only until their grandfather was located, that wasn't much for even a temporary future.

Jake obviously had a past, but if he was willing to change, should she hold that past against him? Nothing in his actions had ever given her any doubt of his character. His actions spoke more eloquently than his history. He deserved a second chance as much as anyone else.

“The marriage would only be provisional,” Jake continued. “We'll find a place to stay. My uncle will help. Once Emil is out of hiding, we can have the marriage annulled.”

In many ways his solution was ideal. They'd stay together. They'd be well out of range of Vic's influence. If the worst happened, and they never located Emil, what then? She had to consider what was best for the children, not simply what was best for her.

Her mind raced with the possibilities. “You know my circumstances. Can you provide for us? At least until I'm able to find work.”

“Yes. The alternative is leaving them in an orphanage. Alone. Or would you rather trust me?”

“Does your family know what you do for a living?”

“They do,” Jake said. “Uncle John was my inspiration.” He drew himself up to his full, dizzying height. “There's something else. I'm a US marshal.”

Lily blinked. “Come again?”

“If we're going to do this, you deserve to know the truth. I'm a United States marshal.”

While admission cleared up a multitude of curiosities, she'd developed a healthy skepticism over the past few weeks of people and their motivations.

Why hadn't he trusted her with this information sooner? She sat down hard on a bench set against the wall. “But I don't understand.”

“My work requires me to assume other identities.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “I was investigating someone in Frozen Oaks.”

“Let me guess. Vic Skaar.”

There'd been plenty of opportunities for him to admit the truth. But would she have believed his explanation before now? Probably not. She'd have assumed he was lying for his own gain. Seeing his obvious ease in the courthouse, and the judge's knowledge of his family, the explanation carried more weight.

Besides, at this point, there was nothing to gain in lying anymore.

“I was investigating Vic,” Jake replied. “I traced a shipment of faulty guns sold illegally to the Cherokee Nation back to Frozen Oaks. Vic was the obvious suspect. He didn't sell the entire shipment, which meant there was a chance I could lure him into selling the second half. Then I'd have my proof.”

“Which meant you had to behave like a man who would buy guns illegally.”

“Exactly.”

All the odd clues fell into place. He behaved in the manner of a lawman because he
was
a lawman. At the jail in Frozen Oaks he'd referred to them as
civilians
. He'd cared for her during their journey. He'd looked out for the children. He'd chastised her for breaking him out of jail. Taken altogether, there was no reason to doubt his claim. Having gotten to know him, she certainly had a much easier time picturing him as a lawman than a gunfighter.

Despite her belief in him then, she still had questions. “Why were we running? Why didn't you say something in Frozen Oaks? Or Steele City? We dragged those children through the country on horseback for nothing.”

His behavior had been much more heroic as an outlaw. As a lawman, his behavior was a deception.

“When I assume other identities, it's imperative that no one else knows. I can't carry any identification in case someone tries to check up on me. Which meant there was no way of proving my identity. I might as well have told them I was the president of the United States.”

He was right. She'd made her decision about him from the beginning. Even when the truth was staring her in the face, she was loath to change her first impression. His actions had spoken louder than words, and yet she'd refused to listen. She was letting her personal feelings cloud her judgment. How had she doubted his bravery? Even for an instant.

Lily straightened. “And you think the children will be safe.” His confession should have made the decision easier. Yet her courage faltered. Why did marrying a lawman suddenly feel so much more intimidating than marrying an outlaw? She stood and faced away from him, studying a wood-framed oil painting of horses grazing in a field. “In Cimarron Springs.”

“No one in Frozen Oaks knows my true identity. There's no way they can trace us. We can buy time while we search for Emil.”

She moved to the next picture, a cottage set in a copse of evergreens. “You said you had an uncle who lives there, as well.”

“Yes. He's got children of his own. He'll help out.”

“Won't he find it odd if you show up with a wife and two children?”

“No odder than anything else I've done. Certainly no odder than the way he met his wife.”

“How did he meet his wife?”

“On a cattle drive,” Jake replied.

“That's definitely unique.”

“I'm fond of Sam and Peter. You're fond of Sam and Peter. Just because we're an unconventional choice, doesn't mean we're a bad choice. They know us. They're comfortable with you.”

“I'm afraid I'm growing to love the little beasts.” She turned away from the painting. “You knew I believed the worst about you. Why didn't you ever say something? You could have at least hinted.”

“Would you have believed me?” A guilty flush spread up from his neck. “You saw me as a gunfighter. I had no proof that I was anything else. If I had simply declared myself a US marshal, what would you have said?”

“I'd have thought you were lying.”

She'd already been through this in her head, but she needed to voice the words.

“Exactly. I did what I had to do.”

He'd kept them safe. All along she'd seen the signs. She'd known something wasn't quite right in his temperament. She should have been relieved by his confession. Instead she felt an odd sense of betrayal. She'd thought his manner was special...she'd thought
she
was special. She'd concocted a story in her head and made herself the heroine: the incomparable Lily Winter taming the wild gunfighter. What a naive fool she'd been. She didn't doubt his bravery, but she doubted her own judgment.

Lily met his questioning gaze. “Everything you've ever said to me is a lie.”

He'd said he admired her, was that a lie as well?

“That's not fair. You never once asked me who I was. You assumed. You assumed who I was, and what I was, just like everyone else.”

The truth of the matter didn't make the acceptance of his deception, and her own gullibility, any easier. “We saw what you wanted us to see.”

She wanted to lash out, but she wasn't entirely certain of the target.

“I'm the same man I was a minute ago, Lily. You trusted the outlaw. Why can't you trust the lawman?”

She made a sound of frustration in her throat. Why did he have to be so logical? She had counted on him when she'd thought he was a gunfighter. There was no reason she shouldn't continue to do so now. Neither her heart nor her head recognized the difference.

When she'd started falling for the outlaw, she'd known that nothing could ever come of her affection. Falling for a lawman was far riskier. There were far fewer barriers between them, and she had far fewer excuses.

“The judge is right,” Lily said. Jake must never know she'd harbored feelings for him, especially if he was proposing a marriage of convenience. She could bear his deception, but she couldn't bear his pity “What happens if we can't locate Emil? What then?”

“That's up to you. Are you willing to care for Sam and Peter indefinitely?”

“Of course I am.”

“You've been through an ordeal. Think carefully about your answer. You can find other work in St. Joseph. If you marry me, if you agree to care for the Tyler children, you'll be leaving everything you've ever known behind.”

“Everything I've ever known has gone up in a blaze.”

She'd counted on a place, not people. She had friends, but no one close. She had people she spoke with, regulars at the boardinghouse and acquaintances she chatted with at the market. Nothing that tied her here. All this time she'd been pinning her hopes on the house for a future, and one candle had destroyed everything. One vengeful act had shattered that future. She'd built her hopes on dry tinder, and not on a solid foundation.

“You saw the boardinghouse,” Lily said. “There's nothing left. Everything I had, all my possessions—everything was wrapped up in that house.”

“Then there's nothing keeping you here?”

“Nothing.”

“This isn't the best solution,” Jake said. “I know that. But I don't have any other ideas. You can take care of Sam and Peter. I'll search for their grandfather. If we can't find him, if—if something has happened to him, at least they'll have a home.”

“True. And this is just a temporary marriage. Until we find Emil. If we don't find him, what then?”

“We'll find him.”

If only she had his optimism. There was no reason she couldn't care for the children if they had the marriage annulled down the road. The judge had other cases. Once he'd assigned the guardianship, she doubted he'd give them a second thought.

She steeled herself for the next question. “Do you have a sweetheart?”

“No.” He shrugged. “My work doesn't give me much time for that sort of thing. What about you?”

An unexpected rush of relief surged through her. “No.”

“Then we don't have to worry about jealous suitors.”

“Nope.”

She had plenty of choices. She could walk away now and never look back. She'd taken care of herself before, she could do it again. There was no reason to stay. No reason but a couple of children who were all alone in the world. Two children she'd grown to care for. She couldn't imagine them alone, fending for themselves.