A Blast from the Past (A Second Chance Romance) (2 page)

The
use of that name sent so many emotions through my body. I hadn't
heard it in sixteen years. It made me happy, sad, excited, and angry
all at the same time. Am I okay, I thought? So much had happened in
my life since he walked out of it. That was the time he decided to
ask if I was okay. What about the other hundred times I needed him?
My body went stiff, and I jerked away from him.

"I'm
fine," I snapped. "Do not call me that."

"I
didn't mean to scare you," he said.

I
could hear concern dripping through his words and shook my head
again.

"What
the hell is wrong with you? You could have at least said you were
there," I growled.

"And
prevent you from continuing the show you were putting on," he
laughed. "Not a chance. Let me go get something for your arm."

"Don't
bother," I said. "It'll be fine. It's not the first time
I've burnt myself. I'm sure it won't be the last either."

When
I turned around, my breath caught in my throat. The man standing in
front of me was an entirely different one than the one who had walked
out that door sixteen years earlier. He was absolutely perfect. There
was no other way to explain him. He was tall. His hair was dark and
his eyes were just as dark. That was the same, but his body was
something else. It didn't help that he was standing there bare
chested with flannel pajama pants hanging from his waist. His arms,
chest, and abs were like something out of a damn magazine. Don't even
get me started on that sexy-as-hell v that led down into those pants
that hung perfectly from his hips. My eyes traveled down and back up
his body. When they stopped on his eyes, reality hit me. Don't ogle
the asshole that walked out of your life. He was your best friend,
and he left you. I closed my eyes. When I opened them back up, I
looked him in eyes.

"I'm
sorry," I said. "I had no idea you were going to be here. I
wouldn't have come over. I just wanted to make sure she ate something
before I left for work. Since you're here, you can finish it. As soon
as I say hello, I'll leave."

When
I moved to walk past him, he grabbed my arm. The warmth that ran up
my arm shocked me. I never thought I'd ever feel that again.

"Let
me get something for your arm."

His
voice was deeper than when he left. There was a soft caring tone
there as well. Don't be stupid, I thought to myself.

"No,"
I said.

"You
okay?" he asked.

"Yep,"
I answered.

"Thank
you for being here for her," he said in a low voice. "She
told me you've been helping her the last couple of years. That's very
nice of you. I was surprised when she told me."

"Someone
needed to do it," I quietly snapped, as I narrowed my eyes at
him.

"You
know I," he began.

Carol
turned the corner just as he started his sentence. I pulled away from
his reach and went to her. She wrapped her arms around me and hugged
me tight.

"I
came over to make you breakfast, but Zander volunteered to finish
making it," I said. "I'm going to get going. I'll check on
you later."

When
I turned to leave, I looked back over my shoulder.

"Are
you going to take her to make the arrangements then?"

"Yes,"
he answered.

"Great,"
I said. "I'll see you later, Carol."

I
couldn't get out of that house and down that driveway fast enough. My
heart was beating so fast. It felt like my chest was closing in on
me. I needed to catch my breath. As soon as I shut my door, I leaned
back against it and let out a long breath. When I reached up to run
my fingers through my hair, I realized it was a mess and took off for
the mirror. My eyes landed on the eyes looking back at me as tears
slid from them and embarrassment hit me. After sixteen years, that
was what I looked like when I saw him. It was not at all how I had
dreamt it would go. I couldn't believe he was really there, and I
couldn't believe what he looked like. How the hell was I going to get
through those next few days without pouring my heart out or losing my
mind, I wondered?

Zander

That
wasn't how I expected to see her again after so many years. Neither
of our lives were the same as they were in high school. She never
wanted a big city life. I knew that. She wanted the country life. She
always had. I remembered her talking about it constantly. Olivia
loved baking. It pulled her away from real life. She enjoyed making
new things and changing the things she already knew how to make. I
was always her tester. Some of the things she made were disgusting,
but others were absolutely amazing. Like melt in your mouth, make you
forget about real life amazing. I knew she'd own a bakery one day.
She had no idea I had anything to do with the fact that she did. As
far as she was concerned, I left for my life in New York and never
looked back. That wasn't the case at all.

When
I walked down the stairs to make coffee, I couldn't help but watch
the site before. She stood there in the tiniest pair of shorts, a
snug t-shirt, and those damn flip-flops. They were all she ever wore.
She couldn't stand to have her feet stuffed inside of shoes. It drove
her crazy. Seeing her like that was the most beautiful sight in the
world. It was such a different site than I was used to seeing in New
York. Women weren't the same there. Her hair was pulled off her neck
in a messy ponytail. She looked different. Her body had more curves
than she did our senior year. She never worried about what anyone
thought of her. I really liked that about her. She was who she was,
and you could take it or leave it. She never let anyone bother her.
Sometimes I couldn't believe how strong she was. It took everything I
had not to grab her in my arms and hold her. I hadn't seen her in
sixteen years. They were the longest years of my life. I was
mesmerized watching her dance while she cooked my mother breakfast.
She had her own family to take care of, but there she was, early in
the morning, taking care of my mom.

It
was hard seeing my mom after so long. I didn't think it would be as
hard as it was to come back home for his funeral. He was always an
ass to me. I never meant a damn thing to him, but she was different.
My mother loved me. We talked once a week on the phone. Getting him
the best doctors and paying all of the medical bills weren't enough.
They thought the insurance covered everything. He would never have
accepted my help, but I knew the stress would be too hard on her. She
always worried about money. Being back made me realize how much I had
abandoned her. I didn't mean to. I just couldn't stand hearing about
how I had somehow disappointed him. She had always defended him to
me. I know he took care of us and made sure she was home with me
growing up. I understood why she loved him. I loved him too. I worked
so hard to make that man happy, but it never worked. The harder I
tried, the worse he was on me. I honestly don't understand why he
even wanted a child with her. He never gave a shit.

I
couldn't help but laugh as Livie flipped bacon and swung her hips.
When she jumped and burnt herself, I felt horrible. I crossed that
floor and tried to get her arm under the water. It was my fault she
was hurt. I don't know if I expected a warm welcome, but I definitely
didn't expect the one I received. She pulled away from me and refused
to let me help with her burn. I was a doctor, and a very good one at
that. Top in my field, actually. She looked at me like I was the scum
of the earth. She couldn't fool me though. I felt her reaction when
my hands touched her. I felt her body shiver beneath my fingers. Her
hands were shaking. She could act all she wanted like my being there
didn't have an effect on her, but she was full of shit. When I called
her Livie, I thought her head was going to explode. It was like I had
said it for the first time. She was pissed that first time I called
her that, but it was something she could never get away from. She was
my Livie. I don't think I had called her Olivia more than five times
those four years in high school.

When
she turned around and I heard her breath catch as her eyes moved down
and back up my body, my own hands were shaking. She brushed passed me
like I never meant a damn thing to her. I wanted to hug her and tell
her how sorry I was about everything she had been through, but I
couldn't do it. There was no way I wanted her to push me away. I had
abandoned her too. She had no idea how much I worried about her. We
wanted different things in life. I wanted New York, and she wanted a
tiny town. We never would have made it. She knew that just as much as
I did. We talked about it often.

My
mom told me all the time those last four years how helpful Livie had
been since she moved back in with her mom. I knew she had children.
That was just another reason we would never have made it. She wanted
kids. She always had. I wasn't interested in having them. There was
no way I wanted to bring little ones into the world to disappoint
them. I never wanted anyone to feel about me the way I felt about my
father. I was never going to risk hurting anyone the way he hurt me.

Livie
married a guy we went to school with. That was a much harder day for
me than I thought it would be. I wanted her to be happy and knew we
would never be together. It didn't make the news any easier though.
They started dating after I had already been gone an entire year. She
didn't seem that happy with him. There were times I wanted to wrap
her up and keep her safe, but I knew she was strong and could hold
her own. My Livie would never let a guy push her around. She was the
strongest woman I had ever met. The day my mom told me he had
proposed was the last day I thought about us together. The last tiny
part of me that hoped we would have a future together disappeared. I
thought that one day she would show up and tell me she loved me, but
that day never came. When she accepted his proposal, I knew it was
time to let her go.

"She's
such a nice girl," my mom said just as Livie walked out the
door.

I
watched her practically run away from me to the safety of her own
home. My mom was sitting down at the kitchen table. I moved to the
stove to finish her breakfast.

"You
have no idea how helpful she's been the last couple of years,"
she said.

I
couldn't help the irritation that spread through my body. My mom had
been through a lot. I didn't want to upset her after having only been
back one night, but I couldn't help the way I was feeling. When I
first walked into the kitchen, Livie looked happy and carefree. That
all the changed the second she laid eyes on me. She treated me like I
was the worst man in the world. That wasn't like her. She was always
nice to everyone. Even people she couldn't stand. That was who she
was. She always gave everyone the benefit of the doubt. There was
always a positive comment or attitude with her. That wasn't how she
had just treated me. She wasn't hiding her disgust for me, and it
pissed me off.

"That's
not what you told me all those years ago, mom," I snapped, as I
put a plate down in front of her. "Do you remember that? You
used to tell me she wasn't good enough for me. Don't get any ideas
about that girl. Wasn't that what you said? You discouraged our
friendship any chance you had. Now all I hear is about how wonderful
she is. You're going to make something of yourself one day while she
stays here in this small town. Those were your words."

"Look
at you," she said.

That
was her reply. I shook my head.

"What
about me?"

I
set my coffee cup down harder than I should have and her eyes snapped
up to mine. Did she seriously think I was better than Livie, even
after everything she had done to help the two of them?

"You
have a great place in an amazing city. You've done very well for
yourself. You're a big shot doctor now. People look upto you. You're
somebody. That's all I've ever wanted for you. You have money now. I
know you're always going to be okay."

I
brushed my hand through my hair before rubbing the knot I felt in the
back of my neck, as I turned to look out the window. It hadn't even
been twelve hours since I had walked through that door, and I was
ready to run as fast as I could away from that house and the entire
town. He wasn't even there. That was the shocking part.