A Beautiful Melody (10 page)

“What?!” I hiss at my brother, who’s just told me the whole reason we stopped talking for the good part of a year, never really happened. “Why the hell would you let me believe that? You knew how much I liked her.”

“I don’t know. I guess I knew you wouldn’t touch her if you thought I had. It was a dick move. I know.
But I promise you – I didn’t lay a finger on her. I didn’t even kiss her. It’s just… I liked her too – ok? I didn’t like seeing her with you. I got jealous.”

“Fucking hell. You’re a total dick.
Out of all the girls you could be interested in, why her?”

“I don’t know. There’s something about her I guess,” he shrugs.

“If you wanted her so bad, why didn’t you ever go out with her before that night? Why did it have to be after she’d shown interest in me?”

“I
don’t know. I just… never found the right moment before then.”

“So you thought if you could
n’t have her, then no one could?”

“I guess…”

“Great. So I’ve been a jerk to her for no reason at all?”

“Yeah. Pretty much,
” he laughs.

“You’re all kinds of fucked up you know?
I have never known anyone as selfish as you are. Shit. Get her in here. I need to apologise.” My stomach turns sour as I think of all the years I held resentment towards her. I ball my fist up and examine my misplaced knuckle, as I wonder whether it would be worth risking another one by punching my brother again.

Marcus is such a selfish brat. He’s always been the same. That typical baby of the family who gets everything handed to them and can do no wrong. Meanwhile, the oldest kid gets handed all the responsibility
and feels like they have to take care of their fuck up for a brother. I sound bitter, I know. But I can’t help it. He just makes it so hard for me to like him.

I’m sure you’re w
ondering why I’m in a band with the guy. Well, it’s because music is the only thing he doesn’t mess up. It’s the only thing we have in common – kind of like it’s our shared language. Plus, he’s my family, so he can be a dick time and time again and I’ll keep forgiving him for it. It’s just the way we are.

Marcus walks over to the door and calls out to
Naomi, who eventually appears in the doorway warily.

“Yes?” she asks, her fingers hooked in the belt loops of her jeans as she bites on her lip anxiously, looking completely adorable. Oh god, what I wouldn’t give to kiss those lips again…
especially now that I know she’s still a Marcus Free Zone.

“It’s done ok? I told him the truth,” Marcus tells her, snapping me out of my thoughts.

“Yeah, I’m sorry for treating you a bit shitty because of it all,” I say softly, watching her closely as she nods her acceptance.

“Listen, I’m sorry that I don’t remember that night. I really am. I’m pretty sure my drink was spiked – not that it’s any excuse. I should have known not to accept a drink from some random guy – it’s like, the number one rule when going out. But, I didn’t mean to come between the two of you. I never would have gone to the party if I had have known that the two guys I was interested in were brothers, and that my actions would drive a wedge between them.”

I bit
e my lip to stifle a grin, I can’t help it. She just said she liked me. Although, my grin falters when I see the exact same expression mirrored in my brother’s features.

“That’s not the kind of girl I am. However, I hope we can put it all behind us now. Based on what’s happening with that video, we’ve got a big chance to make something magical with this band. We can’t let a little teenage drama that happened years ago come between us and the music.
So I suggest we forget about all this shit, forget the party, forget the teenage crushes and focus on making this band as great as we can. What do you say – friends?” she asks, holding her hand out for me to shake.

I briefly remember the first time she did this and feel a slight pang of guilt
for being so rude to her then. I slide my hand over hers and shake it, nodding as I say, “Sure. Friends.” I can’t help but feel another pang hit deep in my stomach. It feels a bit like loss, and a lot like regret. But she’s right, we need to focus on the music – anything else could lose us everything we’ve been working toward.

As I watch her do the same handshake with Marcus, I can’t help but think that this girl holds all the power i
n this band right now. Bringing her in has been the thing that’s getting us noticed, but it could still be the thing that tears us apart.

A slight
protectiveness builds up inside of me as I notice that Marcus spends a bit too much time holding onto her hand, talking quietly to her about how great we’re all going to be together. I vow not to let him get close to her. I know my brother. He’s interested in any pretty girl he’s yet to sleep with, and I’m not going to let him ruin this for us just because he can’t keep his dick in his pants.

“Alright, now all the cutesy friendship ceremony is over, let
’s get the fuck in there and practice. This tour isn’t going to play the music by itself.

“Tour? I thought we just had a gig?” Naomi asks
, looking between us.

“Yeah, the tour is the gig,” Marcus smiles.

“You might want to quit your bar job Naomi, we’re about to tour the country with Radio Silence.”

“Are you serious
?! Oh my god!” she squeals, bouncing up and down and hugging the both of us. I can’t help but breathe in as I circle my arms around her small frame, the smell of soap and girly things fills my nostrils, and settles like a soft cloud in my mind. The memory of her all those years ago is still so fresh, it makes it hard for me to let go.

Friends, I remind myself as I release her and watch her run into the studio and jump all over Lachlan and
Jack. Everyone is laughing and happy. I just hope things can continue like this.

“She’s a hugger,” Marcus laughs, watching as Jack spins her around excitedly.

“Yeah. She sure is,” I agree.

“Are we cool?” Marcus asks, handing me back the keys to my bike.

“Yeah man, we’re cool.”

***

“How’s that song coming along?” I ask
Theo, at the end of rehearsal. It’s almost midnight now, and the others have all packed up and gone, keen to get home. It’s been a long night, and everyone has day jobs. Although, we all need to give notice now that we’re going on tour.

“Um… yeah. It’s alright. I’m working through the lyrics. Thanks again for helping with the melody.”

I nod and smile in answer. “Do you think… I could hear them? I mean… if you don’t want to show me that’s fine. I just… um,” I can’t seem to spit out exactly what I want to say. Everything feels so awkward right now between us, and I’m trying, very unsuccessfully, to be as normal as I can.

“Ok. I’ll show you,” he says, picking up an acoustic guitar and sitting on a stool. “Now, don’t laugh. The
lyrics are a work in progress,” he smiles, positioning himself before launching into the song, his fingers dancing over the strings as he plucks out the tune. “I’m leaving the intro long,” he explains as the music continues.

When he starts to sing, his voice flows through me like a gentle warmth that tickles my spine and ends with the small hairs on my body standing on end. It’s beautiful, his voice, the lyrics, the music – him…

Woke up this morning and I realised you were gone.

This house feels so empty I never thought our time was done.

I k
now you asked me to write you a special song

You were my muse, writing without you seems wrong

He looks up at me, still playing the music.
I can’t help but smile at him as he plays and talks to me like doing the two together is the easiest thing in the world.

“I want another verse
to go in here. Something about windows being open and cold coming in. I’ll work it all out, but this part here is the chorus,” he says, as he starts to sing.

Oh, please know I loved you,

Even though I
was unfair

Please know I still want you

I’ll show you that I care.

Placing his hand over the top of the strings, he stops the music. “And that’s all I have so far. Like I said – it’s a work in progress.”

“
I like it. You have a really beautiful voice. It reminds me of Aiden Price, that Irish singer – have you heard of him?” I ask, trying to keep him talking to me. Now that he’s lost that anger, I’m finding I just want to be around him. I’d love it if we could go back to the kind of friends we used to be.

“Of course I have. I saw him playing last time he was in Australia. He only does these small intimate shows. It was amazing,” he tells me.

“Wow, I’m jealous. He’s probably one of my all-time favourites. He uses a lot of strings in his songs as well. I love hearing the cello in his song
I Recall
. It’s really beautiful,” I tell him, leaning up against a low shelving unit that acts as a home to Theo’s MacBook and holds some recording gear.

“What was really beautiful?” Marcus asks
, interrupting us, walking across the room and opening a cupboard door, pulling out a worn looking note book.

“Ah, Theo’s song actually. I was just saying how it reminds me of Aiden Price.”
I can’t help but feel a little guilty. Like I’m being caught out wanting to spend time with only one brother. Like maybe I’m betraying my other friend. I wonder if there is a possibility that we could all somehow get along and this weirdness that occurs when all three of us are together, will ever go away.

“You’re still going on about him?” Marcus smiles. “She was constantly talking about his music in high school,” he explains
, directing his speech at Theo. “Although you knew her then too. I’m sure you heard all about how awesome he is.”

“No actually. Naomi and I spent most of our time writing our own music. She helped me with this song as well actually,” Theo informs him, his eyes darkening as he gives his brother a smile that doesn’t move past his lips.

The two brothers share a silent exchange that I’m not privy to. Although I feel like there’s a decent amount of testosterone involved. My heart sinks a little as I realise how hard this is going to be now.

They both represent a part of my life where I was changing and growing. Marcus’s friendship taught me confidence
, and Theo’s friendship taught me to explore my creativity and how to see the depth in people.

You know,
when I think of it, Theo is probably the reason I stayed friends with Marcus for so long. I chose to see him for the musician and friend, instead of the womaniser that he was...well – is.

I realise that I’ve been trapped inside my head thinking for a while now, and the brothers are still glari
ng at each other.

“Ok. I guess I’d better take off,” I say, as the tension between them begins to get too much for me
. “I’ll see you both next time.”

“I’ll walk you out,” they both say at exactly the same time.

A burst of nervous laughter escapes me. “I think I’ll be fine. I’m parked right out front,” I explain, picking up my things and walking out as fast as I can without looking like I’m running away.

As I drive home, I wonder
how this is all going to work out. Marcus seems to think he has some sort of claim on me, and now that his brother and I are on speaking terms - I’m not sure what he’s trying to do. It’s as if he wants to keep Theo away from me. But what about what I want? I’ve always regretted losing my friendship with Aramis, and now that he’s back in my life, in the much less made up version of Theo, I’d like to somehow reconnect – as friends of course, anything else would be a fool hardy endeavour. Especially after Marcus and Theo had such a terrible falling out over me all those years ago.

But w
hen I think about what happens between us when we’re alone… Marcus keeps making advances toward me, and with Theo, well… there’s something there. Shit…perhaps it would have been better if Theo stayed mad at me.

“You have to tell me everything,” Stephanie asks me as she sits down opposite me, breathless and running late to meet me for coffee the next afternoon.

“Well hello to you too,” I laugh, indicating the coffee and cake I’ve already ordered for her as I slide my sunglasses on top of my head while she settles into her seat.

“
Hello? Whatever,” she says waving her hand dismissively. “What’s a hello? I haven’t seen my best friend – the godmother of my child for almost two months. You’ve been so busy with this band stuff that I hardly even get to talk to you and on top of that – do you know what I saw posted on Facebook today? A YouTube video of you, looking smoking hot on stage next to lover boy Bailey and do you know who posted that video Naomi? Fucking Radio Silence’s
official
fan page. They’re saying you’re touring with them when they come out here – is that true? Are you actually going to get to meet
Dan Stolle? You have to introduce me. You know how much I love them. I mean, I already have tickets. I ordered them the moment they went on sale. Fuck Nomes – do you know what this means?”

I laugh at her constant barrage of
comments and questions as I take a sip of my coffee. “It means I’m going away for a while.”

“It means you’re going to be
famous
,” she points out.

“Don’t get ahead of yourself. We’re just supporting. We’re not the headlining act.”

“Yes, but do you understand how many other bands would have been going for that?”

“I don’t know Steph. Honestly, this is all happening so fast I’m struggling to wrap my head around it. Tell me something normal. Tell me about what you’ve been doing lately.”

“Me? Are you fucking serious? I stay at home all day and watch a one year old walk around the house and throw tantrums. I don’t want to talk about me! Tell me about the boys in the band. Are you sleeping with any of them?”

“No
and you’re not going to believe this, but I haven’t slept with any of them – ever.”

“What do you mean?”

I recount for her the ridiculous sibling rivalry that Marcus and Theo had over me back in high school and how Marcus allowed Theo to think he’d slept with me just to make sure he stayed away.

“That’s bloody ridiculous,” she says, cutting off the corner of her cake and popping it into her mouth.
“Thanks for ordering for me by the way.”

“
No worries,” I tell her. “But, I know it’s ridiculous, and what’s even weirder is that we did know Theo in high school – he just went by a different name back then.”

“What was it?”

“Aramis.”

Stephanie sat forward so quickly, that she actually sprayed cake out of her mouth in surprise.

“That’s disgusting Steph,” I grimace, handing her a napkin.

“I’m sorry, but oh my god. Theo is Aramis? The
Goth you used to hang out with in the auditorium?”

“Yep.”

“What the hell? Why didn’t we know his real name?”

“I always thought it
really was Aramis,” I say. “Even the teachers called him that. How were we supposed to know?”

“See, that’s the problem with performing arts schools. At a public school a teacher would never go for
some teenage boy going all Goth and changing his name.”

“Perhaps,” I say laughing.

“So, you made out with Theo?”

“Yeah. Years ago though. Supposedly I convinced him to take the
makeup off and he told me his real name. Although, I’m glad I don’t remember it, because that’s why I was naked the next morning. I took all of my clothes off and tried to throw myself at him. So embarrassing,” I say, shaking my head at the thought.

“You know, I’ve never understood why you were so wasted that night. We were drinking together, and I was fine
. We got all of our drinks from the same place. Remember that guy who made us lucky dip to see if we got our favourite flavours.”

“Steph, I don’t think that’s why it was a lucky dip.”

“What do you mean? What else would we be lucky dipping for?”

“
Remember how one of mine was flat?”

“Yeah,
” she replies, looking at me innocently.

“
Oh Steph,” I laugh. “You have no idea do you?”

“About what?”

“I must have won the lucky dip.”

“I don’t get it.”

“How do you not know what that means?”

She looks at me blankly, shaking her head and raising her shoulders slightly as she waits for me to tell her.

“One of the bottles was spiked – with drugs. That’s why it’s a lucky dip.”

“Oh my god!” she gasps, her hand
flying up to cover her mouth. “I gave you that bottle! I drugged you. I can’t believe I drugged you!”

“It’s ok Steph, you didn’t know,” I console her.
“I didn’t even realise until I was reading a book a few years later and the same thing happened in there – I felt like such an idiot.”

“Oh god, you must hate me. I’m responsible for your most embarrassing moment!”

“No. It wasn’t you. It was both of our naivety that did it.”

“
I’m so sorry Nomes, I feel so bad now.”

“Forget it.
It’s in the past.”

“
Alright. I won’t go on about it,” she agrees, returning to eating her piece of cake. “But you have to at least let me talk about the present – tell me all about those hot men you’re spending all your time with. Which one are you interested in? It can’t just be work all the time.”

“
Sorry Steph, I’m not interested in any of them,” I lie, covering my face by lifting the coffee cup to take a long drink before changing the subject. “So where’s Amanda today? I miss my goddaughter, I wish you’d brought her.”

She launches into a diatribe about how Gary is working all the time and he needs to spend more time one on one with his daughter
. As I watch her, I smile, nodding my head and commenting when it’s required. But if you look at me really closely, you can see that I’m not giving her my full attention. My mind is drifting as I think about the Bailey brothers… well – one Bailey brother in particular.