Waiting for You (15 page)

Audrey’s phone beeped with a text from Emma.

Emma:
Babe, where are you? Haven’t heard from you in two days? Called Adam and you’re not with him. I’m worried. Call me!

Audrey was exhausted. She didn’t have the energy to deal with everyone knowing about this and the constant questions.

She texted Emma back:
I’m at the hospital. Grandpa had a heart attack. Keep on the DL.

No sooner had she sent the message did Emma reply:
On my way

She didn’t feel up to company, yet she could always count on Emma to be right there for her whenever she needed her. There would be no point telling her friend not to come, Emma would be at her side regardless.

Audrey walked into the small bathroom and scrubbed at her face which was still streaked with dirt from the previous day’s gardening expedition. Her hair was a mess too and she finger combed it to try and tame it into submission. It didn’t work so well so she piled it atop her head and tied it into a knot.

Walking back into the room she poured a glass of water and grabbed a paper towel and wiped Grandpa Joe’s face. He’d appreciate the cleanliness when he awoke.

A little while later, Emma tentatively knocked on the door and quietly walked into the room, a small bouquet of flowers in her hand.

“Aud, how you holding up?” Emma reached for her and enveloped her in a hug. Audrey was tired and listless as she accepted her friend’s embrace. “What’s the prognosis?”

Audrey parroted the info she already knew back to Emma, hoping it would sound more real but it didn’t. She still felt like she was in a dream, a really really bad dream.

“Why don’t you go home and get some rest,” Emma suggested, propping the flowers into an unused vase at the corner of the room. “I can stay here and visit with him and I can call you as soon as he wakes up.”

Audrey shook her head no. “I need to be here.”

Emma looked pained, the sympathy reflected brightly in her eyes. “I’ll go get us something to eat then.”

Emma left the room and Audrey laid her head against Grandpa Joe’s bed, her hands rubbing his forearm. His skin was still clammy and lukewarm to the touch.
How could this be happening?

She felt a large warm hand on her shoulder before she heard Adam’s deep voice, “Hey, how’s he doing?”

Audrey turned to stare into his face and noticed the worry lines etched around his mouth and eyes. “What are you doing here?”

“Emma told me what happened.”

He reached for her and she fell into his arms, breathing deeply to try and control the tears that threatened to spill over. He didn’t fill the silence with empty platitudes, merely held her and kissed the top of her head, absorbing her silent torment. His embrace gave her some much needed strength and composure.

She disentangled herself and saw that Emma had returned with a coffee and a sandwich which she handed to Audrey. Audrey accepted the coffee but passed on the breakfast, her stomach was still in knots and food was the last thing on her mind.

“He’s going to be ok, Aud,” Emma soothed, holding her around the waist.

Audrey nodded mutely.

“Have you spoken to your parents?”

“I tried to call them yesterday but I couldn’t get through to them. I left a message.” She browsed through her phone, searching for any response. “They haven’t gotten back to me yet.”

“I’ll keep trying them,” Emma offered and Audrey nodded, grateful that she wouldn’t have to deal with her parents.

“Aud,” Adam’s voice was soothing to her frazzled nerves. “Let me take you home. If not to get some rest then at least to have a shower and I’ll bring you right back.”

She started to argue when Emma chimed in. “I’ll stay here Aud. Just a shower and back. I’ll call the minute he opens his eyes.”

Adam’s hand was back on her shoulder. “An hour tops, I promise.”

She reluctantly agreed. She kissed Grandpa Joe on the forehead and said a silent prayer for his recovery. “I’ll be right back Papa,” she whispered.

Adam took her home and waited with her patiently while she showered and dressed. His presence was a silent comfort as he made her more coffee and a grilled cheese sandwich and gently cajoled her into eating some. She was a wreck.

She just needed Grandpa Joe to be ok again. Then, she would eat and then she could breathe.

****

Two days later, Audrey sat by Grandpa Joe’s bedside and read him the latest articles in the newspaper. The hospital staff were kind enough to let her stay through most of the day so she kept occupied by reading or watching some TV on the small room screen.

Her eyes were following the words on the paper when she saw a moment at the corner of her eye. She turned swiftly, only to find herself making eye contact with Grandpa Joe. She turned so quickly she nearly gave herself whiplash. She reached for his hand, the newspaper forgotten.

“Papa? Can you hear me?”

He squeezed her hand and tried to speak, his voice coming out throaty.

“I’ll get you some water.” Audrey raced to the basin and filled the glass with cold water before helping him sit up and getting him to drink.

She pressed the button for the nurse and set him back against his pillows while she waited for the hospital staff to assist.

“Why are we here?” he managed finally.

“You had a heart attack, Grandpa. You’ve been out for a few days.” She grinned broadly. “I’m so happy to hear your voice again.”

The nurse came in then and Audrey stepped aside so they could take his vitals and read his monitors.

“It’s good to have you back Mr. Kelly,” the nurse remarked. “You’ve had this young lady pulling teeth waiting for you to wake up.”

Grandpa Joe reached for Audrey’s hand and squeezed weakly.

The doctor came in a few minutes later and Grandpa Joe was wheeled away for further tests to determine the state of his health. For the first time in days Audrey felt a weight lifted off her chest.

She took the first decent breath in days.

Chapter 15

A
udrey spent the next day talking to the doctors and making sure that Grandpa Joe’s health was on the mend. The older man was getting stronger by the hour. His color had returned and he’d even managed to take a shower by himself.

The doctor was optimistic about his recovery. The upcoming days would be trepid but anything could happen with a cardiac patient. Audrey focused on the positive. His heart was regaining muscle mass. The fluid was slowly draining from around his lungs and Grandpa Joe looked energetic.

Audrey sat beside the older man’s bed and read him the newspaper while he ate his breakfast. She was halfway through the article when she felt him clutch her wrist.

“What’s wrong, Grandpa?”

He smiled sadly as he searched her face. “I’m sorry for scaring you,
Filho
. I can only imagine what must have been going through that pretty head of yours.”

“It doesn’t matter, Grandpa, as long as you’re here with me now.”

“I’m so blessed with you, Audrey. Grandma and I… we always considered you the best gift God could have given us.”

She smiled at him, bursting with love.

“You have always kept me grounded, Papa. Despite everything I went through, I kept my focus on you and Grandma and what you would have wanted me to do. I love you.”

“I love you,
Filho
.”

He closed his eyes and Audrey figured he must be exhausted; his body reparation was taxing on him.

Audrey left him to his zzzs and snuck out to get some coffee and a muffin. The hospital cafeteria was relatively quiet at this time of day and Audrey was granted her breakfast in peace. The last few days had been miserable and now that the pressure was off, the exhaustion slapped her hard. She couldn’t wait to get home, maybe have a nice bubble bath and sleep for twelve hours straight.

Walking back to her grandpa’s room, the most recent Gazette tucked under her arm, she started feeling a ray of hope again. There was a commotion in the hallway and her gaze followed the trail of scrambling nurses and Attending physicians, running into her grandpa’s room.

Oh God.
Panic seized her.

Audrey raced after them and was gently pushed out when she tried to get in the room. Her heart stopped beating.

Audrey stood outside the door, listening for a clue as to what was going on. She heard vague phrases that she didn’t quite understand. Start chest compressions. Fourth shot of epinephrine.
That was adrenaline right?
If he was unconscious then that should shock him awake right? Why had they given him four?
Audrey’s blood ran cold as she stood there for hours it seemed but must have been only half an hour as she could hear the staff trying to revive him.

Eventually a nurse walked out and headed toward her. The pity in her eyes told Audrey the truth that she did not want to hear. “I’m so sorry Ms. Kelly. We tried everything we could. He didn’t make it.”

Audrey’s head was spinning and she could barely make out what the nurse was saying. “Is there someone we can call to get you?”

She shook her head no as the air squeezed out of her lungs, rubbing at the spot, hoping this was a nightmare. “I want to see him,” she managed, still paralyzed in her daze.

Ten minutes later they allowed her into the room. Her grandpa laid peacefully, the white hospital blanket tucked up to his chin. He was free of all the tubes and monitors and appeared to simply be asleep.

Her hands shook as she touched his face. He was still warm. A single tear slipped down her cheek and burned her skin on its path. This couldn’t be right. He was alive an hour ago.

“Papa?” she whispered hoarsely, the grief clogging her throat. “Please don’t leave me.” Audrey buried her head in the crook of his neck and the tears came fast and heavy. She gulped in large breaths of air to try and cope but the pain in her chest stabbed her over and over again with a hot knife.

“Please, Papa, please wake up! Please, don’t leave me. I’m sorry I wasn’t here. I will never leave again, please, just stay with me.”

Her throat was raw and her eyes felt like sandpaper by the time Emma held her around her waist to pull her away.

She scrutinized Emma’s eyes, the sadness mirroring her own. “How did this happen, Em? He was fine and then he just… died.” Her voice cracked again and Emma embraced her hard, as if willing her pain away.

She released her as Audrey walked to her Grandpa and kissed his forehead. “I love you, Grandpa,” she whispered. “Rest in Peace.”

****

Adam spent the proceeding day watching Audrey flip a switch on her emotions. Emma had stayed with her and made some phone calls informing the families and necessary community members about Joe’s death after she had put the grieving brunette to bed.

Sitting in his own living room, he himself felt Joe’s death like a punch to the gut. The man had been a fatherly figure to him since the day he had moved in next door and more so since the day Adam’s own father had died. Being so close to the situation now took him right back to the day he experienced a similar loss. And as much as his father’s death was expected, death in any way was painful.

He felt for Audrey and the loss she mourned. Adam could completely relate. He had no family left. Well, his mother was somewhere in the world, yet for all intents and purposes, she was dead to him. Audrey still had her parents but he understood that in every way that it mattered to her, they were non-existent. Emma had finally tracked down Audrey’s mother and from what Adam could tell, that conversation had been droll. Mrs. Kelly had expressed shock and sadness and when asked if she would make it to the funeral, she’d responded ‘I’ll try my best.’” Her father had died, for Gods sakes. Her daughter was alone and grieving. This was their last chance to say their goodbyes and pay their final respects to a humble man.

When Adam had spoken to Oliver the next day, he’d expressed the change in Audrey. Where she had been devastated and listless the day before, she was busy making funeral arrangements, barking orders into her cell phone and scribbling notes furiously onto a notepad as Emma stood beside her watching but unable to do anything to intervene.

He’d tried talking to her, to at least prevent her from bottling up her grief but she’d smiled a sad smile and said she was fine. She insisted on giving Grandpa Joe the best possible funeral as his last send off from this world.

Adam took a sip of the beer he rested on his knee, the icy liquid cooling his throat. It was a fucked up situation. His cell phone buzzed on the coffee table in front of him and he picked it up and stared at the screen.

Mark Hansen.

What was his old Navy buddy doing calling him?

He answered the call, curious to hear from his old friend.

“Hello.”

“Hey, Parker,” Mark greeted, his tone light and easy going. “How’s it hanging?”

“Massive and to the left,” he answered good naturedly.

Mark laughed through the phone and Adam’s dark unease began to lift just a fraction.

“You know what they say about guys that talk about having a big dick.”

“They have a big dick.”

“Prick.”

Adam laughed.

“How’s Honky Tonk Town treating you?”

“You know, same shit different days.”

“You keen to get in on any action?” Mark asked seriously.

“What kind of action?” Adam took another large gulp of his beer, waiting Mark out.

“We have a mission up North two days from now. Louis is down, got shot in the knee, the poor bastard, so we’re a man down. It’s high priority in a volatile place. I know you’re on hiatus or some shit, but I thought I’d ask if you’d be interested before I took it to the Captain.”

“What’s the mission?”

“Can’t say much ’til you actually sign on and the Captain agrees.”

That was fair enough. Almost all of the missions Adam had been on in the past had been covert and extremely dangerous.

“How long?”

“To fly out, kick some ass, shoot some bad guys and get you back to Stepford City, I’d say a week tops.”

The mission sounded like exactly what Adam needed. He wasn’t planning on going to Joe’s funeral anyways. His own father’s had been the last and he could never do it again. He’d make his peace with Joe and say his final goodbyes. He needed the distance right now and blowing shit up sounded like the perfect way to do it.

“Sounds like a party.”

“Awesome. Will talk to Cap and he’ll get back to you. If all goes well, they’ll send a chopper to pick you up by nightfall.”

“Fan-fucking-tastic.”

****

Audrey stood at Grandpa Joe’s graveside feeling numb. She was cloaked in black from head to toe, including her large floppy hat and dark sunglasses, looking very much the grief stricken part but inside she was frozen.

She could barely recall the last two days and how she had occupied her time but surely kept herself busy because the reality was now here-she was burying the last person who truly loved her. Her last semblance of family.

The breeze picked up and the coolness tickled her neck, a welcome relief from the warm sun. Grandpa Joe had a large turnout for his final goodbye and it was a reminder to Audrey of exactly how loved and cherished the old man truly was. She was touched that the community had taken time to say their farewells.

Audrey had said her goodbyes privately that morning as she had stood in the church, staring at his body in the casket. He appeared so peaceful, as though he were merely sleeping. He was dressed in his finest suit, his hands rested on his stomach and his skin still alive and glowing. Audrey had stood there for so long, touching his hands and his face, now ice cold to the touch. The reality was still unbelievable-Grandpa Joe was gone. She soaked in his countenance, not wanting to forget a single line or crease on his face. His lips had been slightly upturned, as though he had a small smile frozen in place and Audrey wondered if he had seen Grandma on the other side, if she had put that expression of peace and happiness there as he had left the earth. Audrey hadn’t given much thought to the afterlife in the past but she sure hoped that one existed now. It gave her a small sense of comfort to think that that Grandpa Joe’s soul lived on.

A beautiful song by Bethel played as his casket was lowered to the ground and the words pierced her heart. Audrey felt Emma beside her as they both stepped forward to place a white rose atop the casket as it was depressed. More friends joined the fray and gathered around the gravesite as the Reverend said a final prayer and blessed Grandpa Joe’s soul to peace.

Goodbye Grandpa,
Audrey prayed.
I miss you so much already. Say Hi to Grandma for me. I love you.

The crowd thinned out as people greeted Audrey and offered their condolences before getting into their vehicles to exit the cemetery.

Audrey wrapped her arms around herself, wishing the hole in her chest would stop sucking the life out of her. She had barely eaten in two days, instead keeping herself too busy to think. Now, all she could do was feel the emptiness.

Emma’s arm snaked around her waist as she led her back to her car. Twenty minutes later they were back at Grandpa Joe’s house, once again surrounded by far too many people trying to comfort her. She was hugged and kissed so many times that her head began to spin.

“He’s in a better place, Dear.”

“Joe was a good man.”

“He’s an angel watching over you now.”

“It was his time, dear.”

Audrey heard all the repetitive sentiments swimming around in her foggy head but the words offered no solace. Grief had no words of comfort and as much as these people were sad about Grandpa Joe’s death, none of them felt the loss as Audrey did. She mourned alone.

Over the last three days she had waited to hear from her parents and had expected to see them at the funeral but they were no shows. She knew that they were notified about Grandpa Joe’s death because Emma had confirmed she had spoken to her mother. Audrey suspected that Emma sugar coated the conversation they had shared but the fact was that her mother knew about the death of her father and she had just not bothered to show.

Audrey was stifled as she found her way through the crowd of people and into her dark-room. The lights were off and she switched them on, illuminating the room in a red glow. A few photos had been recently developed, mostly the shots of the cove that Adam had taken her to.

Adam had called her earlier in the week to see how she was doing and express his condolences. He was off on some covert operation as far as she knew but even he had made the effort to text her that morning saying:
Thinking of you today, be strong.

Her own parents hadn’t bothered to see how she was doing. The more she thought about them, the angrier she got. It was better than dealing with the emptiness in her soul so she held on to that anger. She fished her cell phone from her small purse and dialed her mother’s number. The line rang until it cut off, denying her the satisfaction of letting her sorrow and anger out at their heartlessness.

She reached out to touch a stray photo lying on the makeshift counter at the end of the room. It was a print she had taken of Grandpa Joe when he had been busy fixing the roof with Adam. His head was tilted skyward and Audrey remembered that he had been gazing up at Adam on the roof that day. His eyebrows were pinched with concentration but his gaze reflected an easy, happy air. Audrey fingered the photo with such care, as though she could actually stroke Grandpa Joe’s wily face. A single tear slipped from her eye and scorched the trail down her cheek like it was acid. She swiped at it angrily, not allowing herself to break down.

She needed to keep busy. It was the only way to keep the reality from consuming her.