Read Forgiving Nancy (Last Hangman MC Series Book 5) Online
Authors: Muriel Garcia
Nancy
Do you ever wonder how different your life would be if just one event hadn’t have happened? I constantly spend my days wondering what my life would be like if I hadn’t have been taken that night. If I had been more insistent for Bennett to pick me up and hadn’t have drunken so much that I needed to get some air, would Bennett and I still be together? Would we have a family? A home? Pets? I have so many unanswered questions running around my mind that I will never have the answers to. Sometimes I think it’s better that way. But no matter how I hard I try to put them from my mind, they always find their way back to my mind.
I was kidnapped five years ago now and my life was turn upside down. I became a prisoner, trapped in a life I never could have imagined myself in. I don’t recognize myself anymore; both physically and mentally. Despite constantly letting my overprotective parents getting the best of me, I always thought I was a pretty strong person. Turns out I’m not, not even close.
There are days where I wish I was dead. My life has been a living hell for the past four years and as crazy as it sounds, a small part of me is relieved. Whilst I am a prisoner here, being a prisoner in my own home surrounded by people who were supposed to love me is heartbreaking. I can’t be disappointed here, I know what to expect, but back there I’d wake up every day hoping that it would be the day my parents looked at me with love in their eyes and every day I woke up disappointed. I often find myself wondering if they’re still looking for me, or whether they think that I’m either dead or ran away so they don’t have to deal with a disappointing child. Did they look for me when I didn’t return to the party? Did they search because they actually cared or because it was the appropriate thing to do?
I fucking hate all of these unanswered questions.
I daydream too much about what my reunion with them and Bennett would be like if I ever make it out of here. Whilst I have no problem imagining the one with Bennett, I fail to see how it would go with my parents. I didn’t love them and they didn’t love me. Our relationship suffered the moment they joined their country club. I’m not sure what they would have done if I had left with Bennett, would we have kept in touch or would have they sent the cops after us? Would they have tried to ruin us?
***
After what seems like forever the van stops and the sliding door opens. I have no idea where we are or how long we’ve been driving, but I have spent every second trying to figure out why I was taken in the first place.
Two sets of strong hands lift me up and carry me outside the van.
“Steady,” I hear another voice say as I’m set down on my feet. He doesn’t sound as aggressive as the man who was shouting at me earlier.
“Let’s go. The boss is waiting for us,” Shouty guy says.
I try to walk but my legs refuse to move or even keep me upright. I don’t know if it’s the alcohol or the fact that I have no focus point thanks to the blindfold.
I feel two hands on my shoulders push me forward until we stop at what I assume is a door. I hear a lock turn before I’m being shoved inside a building of some kind. At least, I’m assuming it’s a building because I can no longer feel the chilling breeze, nor do I hear any sound around me.
We walk for a good few minutes before the hands still gripping my shoulders stop me again. I hear someone fiddle with another key and a lock before a door opens slowly. My reaction to the situation is shocking me, I’m can’t seem to bring myself to put up any kind of fight. I’m too scared to even move. If I struggle then I might antagonize them and who knows what they would do to me. A small part of me is still thinking that this is a trick and any second now my parents will jump out in front of me with smirks on their faces. That has to be it. I wouldn’t put it past them, they could genuinely be behind this with the intentions of scaring me into complete submission.
My heart drops as I’m pushed forward. When I step through the doorway I’m hit with a feminine, flowery smell. I’m confused. I don’t recognize the smell but it’s quite pleasant and calming, like a motherly scent. This doesn’t make sense, surely I should be somewhere that smells damp and like old sweaty men? My binds, blindfold and gag are suddenly removed, but the strong hands are still very much holding on to me.
It takes a minute for my eyes to adjust to the blinding light. When I manage to open my eyes a scene from a horror film is set out in front of me.
Soft music is playing in the background. What should be pleasant sounding music is actually ominous. The place in its own isn’t scary, there’s a long pink hallway lined with doors and a few guards dispersed along it. There are no doors to the rooms making it easy for anyone walking around to see what’s going on. The scary part is what’s happening in the room to my left. I see a girl, not much older than me, staring blankly and moaning as a heavyset man pounds into her from behind.
Shit, this is what my reality is about to become.
My parents aren’t behind this.
I have no idea who is and I’m not sure I want to know anymore.
“Move,” the rough voice of the guy who grabbed me says next to me. I daren’t look at the person as I comply with his order.
The two men lead me into a blueish/grey room that contains a king size bed which sits in the middle facing the door with a nightstand on each side. I look around and see that there’s a wardrobe resting against the left wall and a chair in a corner by the door. I don’t realize my captors have let go of me until another smaller hand grabs hold of my arm and forces me over to the bed.
“This might be confusing to you at the moment, but it’ll all make sense soon. Don’t worry, Nancy,” the only voice I’ve heard since I was taken says.
“How do you know my name?” I finally turn my head slowly to look at the voice and see the person who is behind all of this. My heart shatters when I find myself looking into the eyes of someone who is so familiar and yet is a complete stranger. “What the fuck?” I ask in disbelief.
“I’m not who you think I am. Make yourself comfortable Nancy, you’re going to be with us for a very long time.” He smirks and walks away from me as I fall limply onto the bed in shock.
I feel my world shatter.
Why is this happening to me?
I don’t understand what’s happening.
I’ve never done anything wrong to anyone.
I didn’t know my kidnapper personally but I knew who he was, it’s obvious and that alone was enough to turn my blood to ice.
People say things happen for a reason but I still have no idea what the reason behind all of this. Why was I kidnapped and taken to a brothel against my will? Why were the other girls taken as well? Was it random or were we carefully selected? One day I will get answers to my questions, one day.
We don’t meet people by accident. They come into our lives at precise moments for reasons that can usually only be seen in hindsight, but there’s a reason none the less. Five years ago Bennett entered my life for a specific reason: to show me what true love is and I’ll forever be grateful for the short amount of time I had with him. I still think about him every day; he’s my saving grace, the only thing that’s getting me through the days.
No matter what we do or how hard we try, the past can never be erased or forgotten, not completely. It will always linger in the background but it’s our perception that changes how we let it affects us.
Tonight is the night.
Tonight is the night that I’m taking my life back. Alive or dead, I’ll still be taking my life back and gaining the control I lost five years ago.
Only a couple of hours will tell me whether I’m successful or not.
Bennett
This is fucking heaven. The only thing I’m missing is a hot girl fanning me with a palm leaf.
I’m lying by the pool at Ant and Ayden’s house with a cold one in my hand and my best friends around me. Ant had the pool built not long ago and it’s fucking amazing. I don’t give a fuck if people think bikers don’t have the right to a quiet day by the pool, half naked and with a lot of beer. We need some relaxation too.
It’s still fucking warm outside despite being February, so we’re making the most of the warm weather. My only care in the world right now is that I have Ayden, Line, Viv and Nicole sitting either at the foot of my sun lounger or on the one next to me, yapping at me and I haven’t been listening to a word they’ve been saying. I’m not being rude but it’s always the same damn questions:
‘Why are you single?’, ‘Why aren’t we seeing you with any woman?’, ‘When are you going to settle down?’, ‘Do you want to settle down?’, ‘We should find you someone, what’s your type?’
I guess it’s time I finally give them some answers.
“For fuck’s sake. Women!” I chuckle. “I’m single because I’m single, I fuck women but it’s not like I’m going to do them in front of you. I’m never going to settle down and I don’t want to and no you won’t be finding me anyone, I like my women the way I like my whiskey: thirty years old, naked and chilled.” I smirk as I see their smiles slowly fade.
“Pig. You’re no fun at all.” Nicole whines.
I love messing with them.
“Are you gay? You know it’s okay to tell us, we won’t tell the guys,” Ayden assures me as she rubs my hand in what I’m sure is supposed to be a gesture of comfort and support.
“No, I’m not fucking gay!” I shake my head in disbelief.
How could she possibly think that?
“Well, we’ve never seen you with a woman so it’s a fair assumption.” Viv shrugs.
“I’m the fucking God of tits and beer, I’m just not doing it in front of you, I respect you guys more than that.” I make sure to look at all of them in turn so they get my message.
“Something must’ve happened to you. All of our men were troubled before we got our hands on them and something tells me you’re no different.” Viv looks at me intently and I sigh before rubbing my face.
“So much for enjoying a chilled beer by the pool,” I mutter.
“We just want what’s best for you, Bennett.” Line squeezes my calf and I see genuine concern in her eyes.
“I know you do.” I give them my megawatt smile before taking a pull of my beer.
“So spill it,” Ayden says in a tone that means business.
“You’re relentless, aren’t you?” I raise my eyebrow at each of them in turn.
“Of course.” Ayden smirks.
I sigh. “I met a girl five years ago. We got close, started dating, were just getting serious and were planning to leave town after her graduation when she disappeared.”
“Disappeared?” All four of them ask me in unison.
“Yes.” I look at my beer and start picking at the label in the hopes that it will offer me some distraction. Just thinking about it kills me, but having to say it out loud is pure fucking torture.
“I’m sorry, Babe.” Viv hugs me.
“I’m alright. Don’t worry.” I hug her back and kiss the side of her head.
“Stop kissing my woman, you fucking bastard.” Gabe chuckles, smacking my arm away from Viv’s back after walking over to us.
“She hugged me first.” I shrug.
“I did.” She looks at Gabe with a sheepish grin on her face.
“Why doesn’t that surprise me?” Gabe leans down and kisses Viv, making the three other women sigh happily and me to long for someone to have that kind of relationship with. Yep, I’m a fucking woman. There’s no shame in that. But on the road, I’m ruthless.
“Because you know me so well.” Viv kisses him again quickly before he straightens up.
“That’s true, now go bother someone else, I need to talk to Bennett.” Gabe tries to shoos the girls away as he sits on the lounger next to me. I’m not sure if him wanting to talk to me is a good or bad thing though and I find myself wanting the girls and their yapping back. Because when Gabe wants to talk to you, it either means that he’s in deep shit and needs help or that you’re in deep shit and he knows you need help. I don’t think he’s in trouble and I know for sure I’m not so I have no idea what he could possibly want to talk to me.
“Alright, spoilsport.” Ayden pouts and gets up.
“Nothing new there, Gorgeous Girl.” Gabe chuckles and my face drains. That’s what I used to call Nancy. I haven’t used or heard those words in four years, the last time I spoke to her.
“True,” Ayden agrees and they all giggle as they walk over to their next victim, Ryan. No doubt they’re going to tease them about that nurse he’s been seen with.
Poor bastard.
“Speak up.” Jeez, he doesn’t waste any time.
“What about?” I sit up and look at him.
“Whatever it is that’s bothering you.”
“Nothing is bothering me.” I look at him, confused at his line of enquiry.
“You’ve been looking at us with our women with a fond but longing look on your face, the girls were yapping at you about women or the lack of women in your life and your face screamed ‘help me please’ and when I called Ayden ‘Gorgeous Girl’, all the color drained from your face, so don’t tell me everything is fine,” he says in a rushed voice.
“Can’t hide anything from you,” I mutter.
“No, you can’t. Come on. The sooner you speak, the sooner I’m out of your hair.” He chuckles.
“You’re fucking worse than them.”
“Yes, but I’m more effective and actually give good advice.”
“Maybe.” I sigh and tell him everything that happened with me and Nancy.
“Fuck, I didn’t expect that,” Gabe says and looks at me with an expression that’s full of sympathy.
“Yeah, no one does. I just hope that wherever she is, she’s happy and living the life she deserves.”
“You’re still in love with her,” Gabe states with a smug expression.
“Just like you were still in love with Viv after ten years.” I mimic his smug expression and tone.
“Touché.” He chuckles.
“I just hope she’s okay.” I sigh.
“Ever tried looking her up?”
“Yeah, the only things I ever come across are missing person ads. Her parents had a gravestone engraved with her name on a few months ago but I don’t know if she’s actually dead or if they’ve just given up the fight to look for her.” I shrug.
“Have you given up?”
“In a way, I did. How am I meant to look for her when I have no idea what happened that night?”
“How about asking for help from Jase? Lewis? From your fucking brothers? You are such a dumbass.” Gabe shakes his head at me.
“A part of me hopes to find her and the other part wants to yell at her for leaving me.”
“It’s a natural reaction to have. How come you’ve never mentioned her before?” he asks me sounding perplexed.
“Because deep down I didn’t want to relive the nightmare, it was still too fresh. And then with the shit storm we were going through it didn’t feel right to whine about my personal demons so I buried it.”
“And now having the girls hound you for details has all brought back to the surface.”
“Yep. And it’s fucking torture, but it also makes me feel something again. When I don’t think about her, I’m just going through the motions but when she does cross my mind, I feel like I can conquer anything, even though I’m still fucking miserable and miss seeing her beautiful smile, I feel slightly better.”
“Fuck, you’re turning into such a woman.” Gabe jokes, no doubt in an attempt to lighten the mood.
“The best of us can find happiness in misery. I just wish I had made the choice to pick her up that night when she called me. I should have got on my fucking bike and made sure she was okay.”
“Her disappearance is not on you. You’ve got to remember that. You don’t know what would have happened if you had gone. You might have been able to save her back then, but you might have been killed trying to save her. Not forgetting the kind of life we live, you could have lost her after joining the club. There’s always a chance that the next corner you drive around will be your last, or it could be the making of you. Unfortunately, that’s just life and there is nothing you or anyone else can do about it. You just gotta power on through and not let the bad overtake the good or you’re screwed.”
Well fuck.
“Way to lay it out for me, Master Yoda.” I laugh.
“Welcome you are.” Gabe smirks. “But seriously, think about what I said. I’ll stop picking at your brains about it now. I promise. I got my words in.” He chuckles and gets up. He claps my back before sitting behind Viv on a sun lounger on the other side of the pool, resting his hands on her baby bump. I look at them longingly, I’m desperate for that kind of relationship but there’s only one woman I want it with and I don’t even know if she’s alive.
I spend another hour relaxing by the pool as I think about what to do next. I want to find Nancy. No, I
need
to find her. I just don’t know how to go about it and what I might find on the way. I quickly say my goodbyes to everyone and head for the road, I need to clear my head and going on a long ride is the only way to make it happen.
When I finally get home two hours later, I park my bike in my garage and close the door behind me. I walk into my house through the garage door that opens into the kitchen and put my helmet on the table. I barely have time to take off my jacket before my phone starts to ring. I really don’t feel like talking to anyone right now so I ignore the first call, as well as the next two that follow in quick succession. I pull my phone out of my pocket and throw it on my kitchen table before finally walking to the fridge. I rummage around for some food and a much needed drink as I hear my phone ringing again.
I don’t normally use alcohol to drown my problems, but thinking and talking about Nancy as much as I have today hasn’t done me any good and I can think of nothing better than drinking a nice cold one to help me blur my memories.
I settle on some leftover lasagna Josie made me and heat it up in the microwave before heading into my living room, grabbing my phone on the way. I look at the screen as I walk and see that I have five more missed calls from an unknown number. I tend to ignore any calls from unknown numbers because nothing good usually comes from them. They either cause trouble when you just want a quiet night or are fucking telemarketers who set out to annoy the shit out of you with their latest piece of crap.
I dig into my food and turn on the TV in an attempt to block out the noise of my phone and everything else around me. I try to relax but something in the back of my mind keeps nagging at me, telling me to pick up the damn phone the next time is rings. I guess talking about Nancy today affected me a lot more than I thought because I am actually thinking that if I pick up the phone I’ll hear her on the other end of the line. I mean, who knows? It could actually be her, I never changed my number, just in case she’s alive and needs me. It was a long shot but you never know.
I finish my food, take the plate back to the kitchen and dump it in the sink before pouring myself a glass of whiskey and making my way back into the living room. I flop onto my couch and grab my phone. I call a random girl I met in a bar a couple nights ago and ask her to come over. I need a good fucking to empty my balls and take off the edge.
I don’t have to wait long before she shows up on my doorstep. I guess I’m not the only one needing a good fuck. I open the door and she’s on me like a fly on shit, kissing me and grabbing me wherever she pleases. I’m not about to complain, this saves me from having to do any kind of talking. She presses against my chest, making me walk backwards into my living room. She quickly looks around, getting the feel of her surroundings before pushing me onto the couch.
I don’t have time to speak before she undoes my belt and unzips my jeans, taking out my already hard cock.
She doesn’t waste a second before she starts sucking me like a pro. I rest my head against the back of the couch and let her do her thing. I can finally relax and let the stress of the day wash away, but the mind works in weird ways. Suddenly images of Nancy flash through my mind: her beautiful smile, eyes, lips wrapped around my cock.