Forgiven (9 page)

“Yeah because active labor starts at four centimeters. Fully dilated is ten centimeters. A lot of people will dilate early, not usually this early, though.”

“Right. And what if those medicines don’t work?” I nod towards those bags again. IV seems like an inadequate term for those lines going into her. Those are lifelines.

“We have administered a steroid shot to help with lung development in case she delivers early. She’ll need several rounds to get the baby to have the best chance of survival. Worst case scenario, we’ll have to take the baby early by c-section.”

I cross my arms across my chest and fall back against the wall directly behind me. “So there is still a chance the baby might not make it?”

I’m amazed at how this young girl can deliver such horrible news to me in the kindest, most compassionate manner. She purses her lips and nods her head in affirmation. She reaches out and places her hand on my forearm. Her touch isn’t like the touch of most women. It’s a sympathetic, affirming touch. “Just know we’re doing everything we can, and as cliché as it sounds, there is no better place she could be right now than right where she is.”

I close my eyes and look away. When I glance back to her, I give her a small smile. “Thank you for that.” She goes to leave, but I have to stop her. “One more question?”

“Sure. Shoot.”

“How long should I plan to be here with her? I mean is this something that she will recover from in a couple of days, a week?”

“Oh gosh, I’m sorry. I should have been more clear. We’re just waiting on her room. She will be here until she delivers that baby. Unfortunately, for all of your sake, I hope it’s a long hospitalization.”

And everything in my world halts. I feel so many emotions. I’m definitely not used to this. “Right. Thank you again for your time.”

“My pleasure. Let me know if I can get you anything to make you more comfortable.”

“Will do.”

After she walks away, I drop my head and say a quick prayer for them. I didn’t want the baby to be mine, but I didn’t want any harm to come to either of them. It seems trivial at this point who the father of this child is. The bottom line is that they both need all the support they can get.

“Hey you,” she whispers.

I jump up and am at her side instantly because this room or whatever you want to call it is so small. “Hey. How do you feel?”

She rubs her stomach and eyes the monitor. “The baby’s okay?”

“Yeah, so far so good.”

“Well then I’m fine as long as she’s fine.”

I can’t help but smile. I agree with her. As long as she’s fine, I’m fine. “So you were in labor and didn’t know it?”

“Apparently.”

“Well, I’m glad you’re here. Everything’s going to be okay.”

“I hope so.”

“Me, too,” I mutter as I slide my hands into my pocket and look down. I really do hope this little girl got her mother’s ability to fight and win.

I wait until Veronica has gone back to sleep to step outside to call Gabby. I had stepped away only briefly a little earlier to let my Mom know to call Dad to have him pick her up and take her home. I wasn’t ready to go through the arsenal of questions that I am sure she’s had nothing but time to formulate. I had no intentions of leaving yet.

They have moved Veronica to a room, which thank goodness has more comfortable accommodations. I have no idea what my plans are regarding her. It sounds like it’s just a waiting game at this point. I don’t want to leave her alone, but I really don’t want to be here any longer than I have to be.

I know this will take a toll on Gabby emotionally. I’m sure she’s wondering where I am and what is going on because I haven’t called to check in with her like I normally do during my day. I briefly feel my blood start to boil as I think about the fact that this time for us shouldn’t be complicated at all. And all of this over a child that I don’t even know belongs to me.

I get up and walk into the hall to the nurses station. I tap the shoulder of Veronica’s nurse and she jumps. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you.” I smile and look towards the exit. “I need to step outside and make a phone call.” Pointing to my phone I mutter, “No service in here.”

She nods her head. “Yeah, sucks, I know. It’s no problem. We have monitors out here, so we know what’s going on with her.”

“I just wanted to let you know I’m not leaving. I’ll just be right outside if anything changes.”

“Yep. If you’ll give me your cell phone number, I can put it in her chart in case we ever need to get in touch with you regarding their condition.”

“Oh, that would be fantastic.” She pulls a paper towel and folds it up. I scrunch my eyebrows and let out a small laugh. “How very resourceful of you.”

She giggles. “Yeah, you learn to write on scraps around here.”

“It’s 555.”

“Uh huh.”

“224.” When I see she’s almost done, I finish with, “5485.”

She glances up to me. “Got it, Mr. Banks.”

I can’t even remember if I told her my name. The last several hours are just a blur. No telling what my dad is going to say when he finds out about this. The good thing is he’ll probably have attorney’s here any minute with damn non-disclosure forms to try to keep the press from finding out his son has a potential love child while engaged to another woman. He’ll use this to his advantage to try to explain why I should be with Veronica over Gabby, no doubt. I roll my eyes and turn on my heel, walk through the double doors, take the elevator down, and out the rotating door to fresh air, well smoggy air, but being outside makes me feel free. Like I’m not being suffocated or that my world is collapsing around me.

I punch in the numbers to call Gabby. She answers quickly. “Hey. Where have you been?”

“Hey.” I don’t know how to even begin to tell her. “Everything’s fine right now.”

“Uh. Okay.” She drags out the okay.

“It’s Veronica, Gabby...”

“What happened?” I hate that I’m having to do this over the phone. I can hear the disappointment and concern in her voice. “Is she okay? What about the baby?”

“They are okay right now. I don’t understand it all. Something about the placenta I think they said. It’s partially detached. They need to try to keep the baby in as long as possible.”

“That sounds serious,” she whispers.

“It is. They admitted her. She’ll be in the hospital until she has the baby.”

“Wow.”

“I know.”

“I don’t know what to say. Are you there?” This phone call is so tense. I don’t know how I expected it to go. I thought that being outside would resolve this tightening in my chest, but it’s not. I realize this tightening in my chest is the wedge that is trying to form. This wedge called Veronica that has been trying to come between me and Gabby.

“Yeah. I thought I would stay through dinner and make sure she has everything for the night before I leave.”

“Oh.” There’s a pause and I am at a loss for words. “Do you want me to bring you some dinner?” she asks.

“Yeah. That’d be great.” She has no idea that it’s not the dinner I want. It’s her closeness. I need her. Like now.

“Well as soon as I get done with my session I’ll come by. Which hospital is she at anyway?”

“Emory. Downtown. She was at work when she started bleeding really bad.”

“Ah. Have you talked to Ryan?”

I have had so much on my mind that it didn’t even occur to me to talk to Ryan. “No, but that’s a good idea. Maybe I’ll call him and make sure that we’re doing everything we can. Doesn’t hurt either to have connections. Maybe that will make the nurses look after them a little more.”

“Yeah.”

“Listen, call me when you’re close. I’ll meet you outside. Be careful.”

“What do you want to eat?”

“You can surprise me.”

I hear her voice perk up. “Ah, you don’t usually like surprises Mr. Always In Control Pants.”

It makes me chuckle. “I like you, and you were the best surprise to me. You always surprise me.”

“Hmph. See you in a little bit.”

I smile as I look to the sky. I realize I’ve been pacing. My nerves have had about all the fun they can take today. “Okay.”

“Oh and Mr. Banks?”

See. I think we’re about to hang up and she surprises me. “Yeah?”

“I don’t like you.”

I laugh. “You don’t?”

“No. I love you.”

And just like that she wraps me a little tighter than I already was around her little finger. “Love you, Gabby Girl.”

She hangs up, and I fall back against the bricks on the building.
What a mess this is.
I have to find a way to explain to Gabby that I can’t help move her this weekend. I’m not thrilled with that. The disappointment that I heard in her voice on the phone is going to pale in comparison to hearing that. I can’t possibly leave and take a chance on something changing here and me being four hours away. I decide in that moment that I need to talk to Veronica.

When I walk back into the room Veronica is awake. I watch as relief floods her face. “I thought you had left.”

“No, I needed to make a phone call.” I pull my cell phone out of my pocket as I sit down and place it beside me on the couch. “This thing has zero service in here. I told the nurse I would be right back.”

She smiles. “Oh. She hasn’t been back in here since I woke up.”

I nod. “How do you feel?”

“Physically or mentally?”

I shrug. “Both.”

She swallows. “Physically I feel okay. Just tired. It’s hard to believe there is something wrong because I don’t really feel any different.” She reaches over to the jug of water that is on the tray beside her and takes a swig. “My mouth is super dry.” She puts it back. “Mentally...” She puts her head down and she dabs her fingers on the corners of her eyes. “Scared...” Her voice quivers. “I’m scared,” she whispers through tears as she glances back up to me.

I look down. “I know.” I cross my legs and fidget with the fabric on the hem of my pants. It makes me smile a small smile because it reminds me of how Gabby fidgets when she’s nervous. Maybe she’s rubbing off on me. Am I nervous, or just extremely uncomfortable with the awkwardness of the situation? I’m not sure how long I can avoid the elephant in the room. “I don’t want to upset you.”