An Outback Affair/Runaway Wife/Outback Bridegroom/Outback Surrender/Home To Eden (5 page)

“And what are you going to do with yourself while you're here?” Sarah looked up to pin Laura's green gaze.

“Evan asked me exactly the same thing.”

“So what did you tell him?”

“That I haven't thought that far. I didn't tell him I was married. Did I make a mistake, Sarah? I couldn't, for some reason. He's so intuitive he immediately cottoned onto the fact I was on the run. But he surmised a boyfriend.”

Sarah studied Laura's down-bent face. “You do have a certain look of—”

“Innocent at large?” Laura asked dismally. “I must correct that.”

“No one would know from looking at you the awful experiences you've been through. It's the lovely gentle look, the white skin. I'm not surprised Evan jumped to the conclusion you're unmarried. Evidently you brought out the protective streak in him.”

“I must have.” Laura blushed. “From what I'd gathered I expected someone quite aloof, or at least with considerable reserve.”

“He can be like that,” Sarah conceded thoughtfully. “He's certainly disappointed a lot of women around here. They're fascinated with his aura. He doesn't smile often, which is a pity because—”

“When he does it's like the sun coming out,” Laura interjected. “He has a beautiful smile.”

Sarah dimpled. “I'm so glad you got on well together. I didn't think you'd take the cottage, actually. It's so small. But I'm sure you can make it comfortable. It's good to know Evan Thompson will be right next door. I wouldn't care to tackle him if I were in the wrong. There's one man who knows how to take care of himself.”

“I don't think that's his real name, do you?”

Sarah tipped her head to the side. “A great deal of speculation goes on about Evan. Even Kyall is thoroughly intrigued. The two of them get on well. Obviously Evan's not what he purports to be—a wood worker. Though I believe his pieces are simply beautiful. I intend to follow that up.”

“He's promised me two chairs.”

“Gracious, it could be the start of a collection,” Sarah teased. “Evan must have treated you very nicely. You're looking so much more relaxed.”

“I'm starting to feel it.” Laura spoke softly, gratefully.

“That's good. When you feel strong enough you'll have to address the problem of Colin, though I know it won't be easy.”

“No. A year of his cruelty has left me with many self-doubts and fear.”

Sarah reached out and gripped her hand. “You have friends. There are ways of protecting you. Now there's Evan. A man like Colin would have to be very brave to mess around with him.”

“What if he finds out I have a violent husband?”

Sarah studied Laura's face, knowing full well the terrible psychological damage victims of abuse suffered. “The right moment will come to alert him.”

“Yes.” Laura's answer was hopeful. “I suspect Colin is already looking for me. Probably he thinks I'm hiding out somewhere in New Zealand. He'll have contacted my mother to see if she knows where I am.”

“And does she?” Sarah hoped not, for both women's sake.

“No.” Laura shook her gleaming dark head. “It will be a lot better for Mum if she doesn't know. I wrote her a long letter before I left, trying to explain how unhappy I was. I didn't paint Colin as the villain he is. I'm too ashamed.”

“You did nothing wrong, Laura,” Sarah consoled her, aware this was a common reaction.

Laura looked away. “I should have made a run for freedom long before this. I took a year of fear, degradation and punishment. You wouldn't have taken it, Sarah. You have such confidence and purpose about you.”

Sarah's expression changed. “I'm not the strong, problem-confronting woman you think I am, Laura. I'm no more invincible than you. I find being a doctor deeply satisfying, but I've made lots of mistakes in my emotional life. I've lived with unresolved issues for far too long. I've always made the excuse that I've been uncertain of the outcome if I tackled them. I'm still learning about my own self. I don't suppose we ever stop.”

Laura looked across the table. Saw a beautiful blonde woman with velvety dark eyes. There was nothing weak or ineffectual about Sarah Dempsey. She looked strong. In control of her life. Laura deeply envied her. “You wouldn't al
low a man to physically and sexually abuse you, Sarah. You have an inner self-assurance I don't have.”

“You're so young, Laura. Even now.” Sarah endeavoured to comfort her. “Abusers—men like Colin—pick their mark. They're drawn to gentle, sensitive women and they like to get them young. Had you been a few years older he mightn't have found it quite so easy, but circumstances played right into his hands. At that time you needed support—not just emotional. You'd lost your father, your mother had remarried and gone away, and then your husband cut you off from your friends. He did enormous damage. What a cruel man he must be. All those times we met at functions and I never suspected for a minute he could possibly be violent with you. He behaved as though he adored you while behind the scenes he made you suffer.” Sarah shook her head in disbelief.

“Even my mother was fooled. I'm sure she doesn't know what to think even now. Colin will have told her such lies. Colin the ruthless manipulator. He's so convincing. You've seen that. He'll make my mother think I have problems handling the role of wife to a very successful cardiologist. A man who saves lives. Colin always used to sneer at me. Say I'd been over-protected. Wrapped in cotton wool. The classic Daddy's Little Girl, as he said. I loved both my parents. Losing my father has only made me love him more.”

“Of course, Laura. Coming from such a happy, stable home you were ill-prepared to take on Colin's aberrant behaviour. But I too know all about powerlessness and humiliation. I'll tell you about it some time. Meanwhile, you've got enough on your plate.”

I
T WAS
mid-morning when the furniture van arrived.

“Careful, Snowy!” Zack warned his young offsider as they tried to manoeuvre a sofa through the small doorway.

It was clear Snowy wasn't listening, or he had no aptitude for these activities.

“Steady on, boy!” Zack shouted the caution. “Miss Laura here ain't gunna be happy if you knock a chunk out of the front door.”

“Won't go in, Zack. The bloody doorway's too narrow,” Snowy offered miserably.

“Language, son. No need to swear.” Zack cast an embarrassed glance at Laura as though she had never heard a single swear-word in her life.

“Sorry, miss.” Snowy made a distraught movement of his ash-blond head.

“Put it down for a minute,” Zack said crossly, his temper still simmering from yesterday. Snowy was always breaking something—forcing it. He still had a lump on his head the size of a plum from yesterday's mishap with a wardrobe—but Snowy was the wife's nephew. A more than usually stubborn boy, with not all the cards in the pack. Took after his dad's side of the family, of course…

“Having problems?” Evan Thompson appeared on the open verandah of the colonial next door, looking the very picture of the legendary alpha man.

“You could say that!” Zack replied with sarcasm.

“Give me a minute; I'll be there.”

“Thanks, mate!” Zack called back more cheerfully. A smart guy like Evan would make this manoeuvre the easiest thing imaginable.

Evan waved a response then went back to the phone, fin
ishing off his progress report to the agent who was eager to market his book.

Moments later he pushed the little picket gate of the cottage. It needed to be open. Who had closed it? Laura was standing on the tiny porch wearing a little ruffled yellow sundress that made a pool of light. Her long silky hair was drawn back into a knot, exposing her pretty ears, delicate bone structure and the long lovely line of her throat.

“Good morning!” A day and already he was far too involved with this young woman. Certainly his eyes had fallen in love with her beauty. The fatal flaw in him: his susceptibility to beauty.

“Good morning, Evan,” she responded, so happily it touched his iron-clad heart. “It's so nice of you to come.”

“I'd have been here earlier, only I had to field a few calls. So what's the problem, Zack?”

Zack gave him a frustrated look. “Snowy here don't seem capable of negotiating the front door.”

“Yah'd better believe it!” said Snowy, treading backwards and bumping into the planter's chair he had already placed on the porch.

“I'd be real grateful if yah could take his end, Evan.” Zack snorted his disgust.

“No problem.” Evan had solved it on sight.

“Not my idea to be a removalist,” Snowy defended himself, relinquishing his end without argument. “I told Mum but she called me a lazy bum. That's exactly what she said, ‘Snowy, you're a lazy bum.'”

Evan laughed. “And you're saying that's not the case?”

“I wish she'd listen.” Snowy's voice dropped dolefully as he watched the two men make short work of getting the sofa through the narrow doorway.

“Make yahself useful, Snowy.” Zack took a couple of beats to yell at him. “Go get the little stuff.”

“I'll help you, Snowy,” Laura said, anxious to be useful herself, and sorry for the unfortunate young man.

“That's okay, miss.” Snowy lost his gloomy look, going
a bright pink under his freckled tan. “I don't want you doin' nuthin'. Besides, Zack is takin' yah money.”

 

“Well, well, you made quite a conquest with Snowy,” Evan observed some thirty minutes later as the furniture van pulled away. “He's got a giant crush on you already.”

“I think I believe you!” Laura paused in her rearranging to smile. “He doesn't seem at all suited to help Zack out in the business.”

“From what Zack told me he's been responsible for some major damage,” Evan answered dryly. “As a removalist Snowy seems a complete incompetent. I wonder if he could find work on one of the outlying stations. From all accounts he's very good around horses. He told me he loves to be outdoors. I might have a word with Mitch Claydon. The Claydons—you'll be meeting them—own Marjimba cattle station. The McQueens have always stuck to sheep—Australia produces the world's finest wool—but Wunnamurra is only a small part of their business interests these days. They're big. I can tell you that. You've heard about the McQueens from Sarah?”

“Not a lot.” Laura settled a few cushions on the sofa, looked around for his approving nod. “Sarah has been too busy listening to me. I've met Kyall twice, when he's called in to the house. What a splendid couple they make! Very obviously he's deeply in love with Sarah, and she with him. But a few odd comments around the place have made me wonder if there's some secret family business. Sarah keeps hinting I might hear something soon.”

“Well, then…” He shrugged, pushing a small bookcase against the wall. “It's no secret Sarah doesn't get on with Kyall's grandmother, Ruth McQueen.”

“I gathered that. She's a formidable lady?”

“That doesn't say it.” His handsome mouth compressed. Ruth McQueen, matriarch of that powerful family had all but repelled him on their few encounters. In her seventies and still a striking-looking woman; it was more to do with her
aura. He'd met people like Ruth McQueen in his other life. Ruthless people. People one didn't cross with impunity.

“But Sarah will be part of the family?” Laura turned as she spoke, making a forlorn little gesture with her hands.

“Yes,” he agreed—like Laura, thinking of its implications. He let his eyes linger on her. He had to realize he was becoming too protective of her on some deep elemental level. Maybe it was her size. He towered over her. Maybe it was her inherent sensitivity, her vulnerability?

“Sarah did tell you she and Kyall have been bonded since childhood? Apparently it's been quite a love story. Everyone in town knows about it. I expect you do too.”

“We haven't really caught up. Sarah's determined to help me.”

“Do what?”

“Find my feet, I suppose.” She sank onto the deep yellow sofa, colourful crushed velvet cushions piled all around her. “Sarah is such a strong person. I'm very wobbly compared to her.”

He shifted the coffee table a fraction, then took the armchair opposite her. His back was to the sunshine that streamed into the room. It danced around her in golden beams. “We've all got wobbly areas, Laura. I think Sarah, for all her inner strength, carries a few burdens. She'll have them for some time while Ruth McQueen is around.”

“But in the end the most tremendous thing is she'll have Kyall's love and support. One only has to see them together to know their marriage will work.”

“And you're very fearful yours won't?”

“What do you mean?” Her heart suddenly pounded, though she did her best to hide her agitation.

“I thought that was clear,” he answered mildly, thoroughly aware of the change in her. “For whatever reasons you're fleeing your own relationship. Obviously you don't trust your boyfriend enough to marry him. He mustn't provide you with a sense of security. Or you don't love him enough. Do you?” The look he aimed at her was very direct.

Flustered, she looked away. “I thought I did. Once. He put so much into our courtship. Showered me with gifts.”

My God, wouldn't that be easy? Showering this beautiful creature with gifts. “Well, he wasn't getting a bad bargain,” he gently mocked.

“A beautiful, gifted wife in the making.”

“He didn't make me feel that.”

“So why didn't you confront him with it?” He frowned. “Why did you continue the relationship at all?”

She clasped her ringless hands together. “I can't find the answers.”

“You're very young, Laura. You're only in the process of becoming the woman you're going to be. Why do you think people make so many mistakes when they're young? Living is all about the getting of wisdom.”

She took a quiet breath, nodded. “At least I'm beginning to see more clearly. I lost the protection of my father,” she added poignantly

“Protection?” His head went up and a glitter invaded his dark eyes.

“I haven't been terribly clever with my life up to date, Evan. You've surmised that, I desperately needed good advice, but as it happened there was a lack of it. I'd like to be stronger, more able to defend myself, but it won't happen overnight. I need time to change my world and my position in it. Most of my friends always were far more sophisticated than I. My friend Ellie used to have a little running joke about me being the Sleeping Beauty.”

“Evidently you haven't found your prince?”

“Are there princes in this world?” All at once she knew there were. The woman this man loved would find a safe haven, a powerful benign presence. Solidity.

“My answer is yes, Laura. You told me you adored your father. Weren't your parents happy?”

“Wonderfully happy,” she sighed. “My father was the kindest man in the world. He was marvellous.”

“Why can't you talk to your mother?”

“She lives in New Zealand. She married a sheep farmer a
few years after we lost Dad. She had one happy marriage. She wanted another. My mother can't live without a man.”

“Wouldn't most women want to be in a relationship?”

“Better to be on one's own than unhappy.”

“So why endure a relationship that's not working? What's the worst thing about this boyfriend of yours? I don't hear his name.”

“I can't talk about him yet, Evan.” Even Colin's name made her feel in insecure.

“Okay. But you've confided in Sarah? You need someone to talk to?”

“Sarah is another woman and she's very understanding. I consider myself very lucky to have her for a friend.”

“How long have you known her?”

She'd have liked to say for ages, but she had to tell the truth. “A year, on and off.”

“And here I was thinking you'd known one another for ever.”

“Getting to know someone in a day isn't all that impossible.” She knew she held his dark gaze longer than she should. “You think people are going to be one thing and they turn out to be quite another.”

“I assume you're referring to me?”

She couldn't say she was referring to her Jekyll and Hyde husband. She evaded the answer. “How did you get to be as tough as you are?” She couldn't find the precise word, but there was nothing remotely soft about him. He was very much the man. The man of steel.

“Tough?” He sounded unconvinced.

“You carry that image. I don't mean tough as in rough.” She coloured a little. “Certainly not. I mean able to meet challenges head-on. To be a resilient, functioning, strong individual who can handle whatever life throws at you.”

He laughed without humour, remembering how it was. “Laura, it was a big struggle. I have my moments of inner devastation.”

“But you carry on?” She couldn't leave this question of personal inner strength alone. She carried so much self-
disgust at the punishment she had taken during her short marriage.

He saw her eyes, beautiful, haunted. “Why are you so unhappy? It can't be simply a fear of plunging into marriage with the wrong person?”

She pulled a sapphire blue cushion onto her lap. “Have you ever been in love, or felt or thought you were in love?”

His mouth quirked. “I figure at thirty-eight I must have been.”

“And the woman I resemble?”

The sombre expression was back in place. “You don't resemble her at all. A figure-type—petite and slender. The way you wear your hair.” He wanted to reach over and pull her hair out of its loose knot, watch its silken slide around her romantic face.

“You were in love with her?”

“Questions, questions!”

“If you can ask them so can I.”

“I was in love with the woman I thought she was. She was never that person,” he said, his eyes disturbingly dark.

“I'm sorry.” She was afraid that woman had badly hurt him. “So, has it taken a long time for you to become involved with anyone else?”

His deep attractive voice was full of amusement. “I certainly don't intend becoming involved with you, miss.”

“I know that.” Yet something in his eyes made her head whirl. “I'm not planning any involvements for a very long time. Maybe never. We're two people who escaped out here to breathe.”

“Exactly.” His tone was calm.

“It's extraordinary the way I feel free to talk to you.” By doing so she felt she was helping herself.

“What's your boyfriend's profession?” he surprised her by asking.

“He's a doctor.” The words were uttered; too late to take them back.

“Am I hearing correctly? A doctor?” He frowned. “I would have thought a doctor would be an understanding per
son. Caring for people is what their calling is all about. For most of them it's very important. I've known some heroic doctors in my time.”

They weren't about inflicting cruelty and pain, Laura thought.

In front of his eyes her whole demeanour altered. “Do you doubt your ability to carry off the role of doctor's wife?”

She gave a restless little shake of her head. “It could be I'm not fit to be a wife at all.”

“Stop putting yourself down. You shouldn't do it.”

“Lots of things I shouldn't be doing, Evan.” She sighed and tried to smile. “Like sitting here with you when we should be up working.”

“I can take care of the work.” He stood up, filling the small parlour with his sheer presence. “I can tell you one thing, Laura. You don't need anyone in your life who remorselessly drains off all your self-confidence.”