Ties to the Blood Moon 2nd Edition (24 page)

I felt so depressed and helpless. I didn’t know how I was going to find her or even where to start looking.

For some reason, every time I pictured my mom, she was twirling that clover. Then it hit me and I stopped chewing the inside of my lip. “Hey, wait a minute. Maybe there is something else. I didn’t say anything about it because I didn’t think it fit.”

Aunt Bev dropped into her chair like she was exhausted. “No,” she simply replied. It means I definitely believe you. When we were kids, we had a beagle.”

“Okay? And that means … what?” I asked, wondering if maybe she was having some sort of breakdown.

“When we found Clover, she was nothing more than skin-covering bones and so weak she couldn’t lift her head. We didn’t know what to do so we ran and got our dad. You see, someone had starved her, and then dumped her on the side of the road to die. She looked up at our dad with the saddest big brown eyes I had ever seen and wagged her tail. Dad picked her up and she licked his jaw.”

“Aunt Bev, what in the hell does that have to do with clover?” I didn’t mean to go off on her like that, but I was getting so frustrated.

“The ditch we found her in was covered with white clover. Hence, the name Clover. It was Camilla’s idea.” She barely got the last sentence out before she broke down.

I rushed to her. “Shh, everything’s going to be all right,” I whispered, leaning my head on top of hers.

She patted my hand, and then stood, turning to face me. “I guess Camilla knew I would be skeptical, so she showed you that silly little clover, knowing you would tell me. There’s no way Zane or anyone else could possibly know that.” She grabbed up her purse from the counter. “I’ll go to the library and start going through maps of Alaska. I’ll start with caves that are located behind waterfalls and go from there.”

“Do you want me to go with you?” I asked, already headed for the door.

“No! Uh … I mean, stay here and wait for me. I don’t need anything happening to you. Try to figure out what it was you saw sticking out of the lake.

“All right, but promise me you’ll call as soon as you find out anything.”

Aunt Bev disappeared through the kitchen door and a minute later I heard her tires bark against the pavement as she tore out of the driveway.

I waited until I was sure she was far enough away before I ran upstairs to grab my shoes and jacket. When I entered my room my cell phone was vibrating across my nightstand.

I scrolled through several text messages from Luna. All of them basically said the same thing. She wanted to know where I was, and what my plans were. I assumed she meant my plans for finding Zane, but the truth was I didn’t have a plan. Not yet anyway. I didn’t have a clue where to find him or how to go about starting.

I jumped when the doorbell rang.
Who could that be?
I rushed across my room and pulled my curtain back just enough to see Luna’s grandfather’s truck parked in the driveway, and the bright sun beaming outside.

“Damn, Luna. Give me a minute to answer your texts,” I mumbled under my breath. We had just gotten home, and she was already pressuring me to give her a decision about how we were going to stop Zane.

I stomped down the stairs, unlocked the front door, and threw it open hard. So hard in fact, it put a nice hole in the wall.

My anger turned to surprise when I found Joseph standing on my porch. He raised his head just enough to lock eyes with me. He had his hands stuffed deep inside his front pockets, and he had a worried look on his face.

I raked back my hair, and realized I hadn’t even brushed it yet. “About what?” I asked while looking down at my pants where I pulled at a loose string.

“Himself?” His voice grew more harsh. “Has he told you what he is?”

My head shot up, turning to face him. I wanted to shout that I knew, but I held my tongue. “Has he told you?” I asked. I didn’t want to reveal what William had told me without knowing exactly how much Joseph knew. I mean, it’s not every day a girl finds out her boyfriend is a vampire. Even when I just thought about it, it still sounded so weird.

Joseph’s eyes narrowed. “I know all about him … but, do you?”

Chapter 38

“What exactly are you talking about?” My heart rate started to rise, and anger rushed over me. “The fact that William is a vampire? Of course I know. He told me everything.” I said severely.

“Everything?” Joseph furrowed his brow. “Ha! I seriously doubt it.” His hands shook.

We glared at each other, but neither one said anything for a long moment, until finally Joseph spoke again.

“Look,” he said softly, while dropping his shoulders. “I don’t want you to think I’m jealous or anything like that. I care about you a great deal and I don’t want to see you get hurt … or killed,” he paused before adding, “The truth is, I don’t think you do know everything there is to know about him.”

“Like what, Joseph? You’re telling me there are things I don’t know about him, but you haven’t told me what.”

“You need to ask yourself if you really want to know. Because I don’t think you’ll like what I have to say.”

“Joseph,” I snapped. “For Christ’s sake, just tell me!” I didn’t realize I was shaking until I went to push a loose piece of hair behind my ear. I took a few deep breaths while I waited impatiently for what seemed like an eternity before Joseph finally started to talk.

“I don’t believe William has told you everything, and the reason I say that is because if he had, you wouldn’t be sitting here right now.”

“Oh? And why’s that?” I folded my hands neatly in my lap, trying to put on a strong front, but I got the distinct feeling Joseph saw right through me.

“William is working for Zane,” Joseph said it quickly and then dropped his gaze to the floor.

I jumped up from my seat “You’re lying! William would never work for a monster like Zane,” I shouted, but quickly turned away when I felt the hot sting of fresh tears. I walked over to the window, cracked the blinds a tiny fraction, and wrapped my arms around myself. I stood with my back to Joseph, and because I was preoccupied, I didn’t realize he’d walked up behind me until I felt his hot breath wafting my hair.

“I’m sorry, but it’s true.” His voice grew quiet. “I’m not trying to hurt you, but when I saw you two kissing on the plane, I knew he hadn’t told you the truth,” he whispered softly, gently placing his hand on my shoulder.

I sobbed quietly. He tried to get me to turn around but I wouldn’t. I didn’t want him to think I was weak. Especially when I was supposed to be a leader … his leader.

“I saw him and Zane in my vision. And when I read Zane’s mind that night outside the cave, I saw it again. That’s why we didn’t come looking for you. I knew William was waiting for you behind the rocks. That whole rescue thing with him supposedly knocking out Zane was all a set up.

“When you saw me lean close to William and whisper something, that’s what it was. I told him I knew, and if he didn’t come clean and tell you everything by the time we got back to Haven, I would.” Joseph grew extremely quiet. He let out a deep sigh and walked away from me.

“Are you sure about this?” I cleared my throat and uttered, barely audible.

“Yes … and there’s more,” Joseph said hesitantly, stumbling on his words. I think it was because he saw how much he’d already hurt me. “He, uh … he’s here to, uh … keep you from taking the throne.”

When I turned around, Joseph was sitting on the couch, again. My face grew hot, and my breathing labored. I was incredibly angry, screaming out like I was in pain. The next thing I knew, Aunt Bev was screaming for me to get away from Joseph. I had transformed, and if she hadn’t walked in when she did, I would have ripped out his throat. I promptly changed back and looked apologetically at him for a second, then fell to the side, shaking uncontrollably.

“Oh my God, Joseph. I … I didn’t mean—” I peered briefly at Aunt Bev, but couldn’t bear to see the terrified look in her eyes. I ran out of the den and up the stairs, slamming my bedroom door behind me.

I couldn’t believe what I had just done. Joseph had never been anything but kind to me, and I almost killed him. I really think he would’ve died if she hadn’t intervened. I wondered why he hadn’t transformed and at least tried to defend himself. Worse than anything was the confused, hurt look in his eyes I saw when I came to.

“Gen,” Joseph said gently. “I know you didn’t mean to …” he trailed off, and sat on the side of my bed.

“I’m starting to feel like a monster, and I hate myself for what I almost did to you.” I sat up and turned to face him. “You need to leave. I can’t control myself. I’m too dangerous to be around anyone right now.”

He didn’t go. Instead, he pulled me close to him wrapping his arms around me. I looped my arms around his neck, burying my face in his shoulder as he held me tightly.

“Shh, it’s all right. You didn’t hurt me.”

He gently rocked back and forth, trying to comfort me. Him holding me was soothing, but I still felt terrible for what I had done.

“If my aunt hadn’t walked in, you would probably be dead right now. I’m dangerous, Joseph, and you shouldn’t be here,” I said through a tight throat.

He pushed me back just enough to see my face, but I promptly lowered my eyes. “Don’t say that,” he said softly, brushing wild strands of hair away from my face. “We were all like you once.”

He gently lifted my chin, but I still averted his gaze, feeling too ashamed to look at him after what I’d done. I had ultimately come to the conclusion I would have to go after Zane on my own. It was just too dangerous to allow anyone to go with me … especially the ones I cared about the most.

Finally, I looked up at his big amber-colored eyes. Funny how I had thought I remembered them being brown. For the first time I actually saw just how beautiful they really were and how I suddenly felt drawn to him for some reason. Almost like we were connected in some way. Maybe it was simply because we shared a kinship—we were both werewolves—or maybe it was because I was finding myself attracted to him.

William suddenly popped into my mind, and I felt like I was somehow betraying him. I jerked away from Joseph and scooted off the bed.

“What is it?” He asked earnestly, slowly rising to his feet.

I shook my head and turned away. “You have to go.” I was sure he caught my icy tone. I didn’t want to be mean to him, but he was stirring something inside me and I couldn’t allow that. Even if all the things he was saying about William were true, and I didn’t know that they were, I couldn’t just jump from one to the other. It wasn’t what I was about.

“I can’t leave you like this. You’re hurting and I feel like it’s my fault.” He touched the back of my shoulder and I abruptly pulled away.

I took a deep silent breath and let it out before turning to face him. “I’m fine now.” I forced a smile. “Thanks for everything, but I can handle it from here.” I pulled open my door and stood beside it, making sure not to look directly at him.

“But—”

“Joseph,” I said, not unkindly. “Please, just leave. I need to be by myself. Really.” I forced a reassuring smile, but it fell away quickly.

He dropped his shoulders and sighed as he started out the door, but stopped when he stepped next to me. He leaned in close brushing his soft, warm, lips across my jaw.

Chapter 39

My body trembled long after Joseph had gone. I didn’t know exactly when my feelings for him had changed, but they must have for his touch to affect me the way it did.

I froze when I heard a knock at my door, but relaxed a tiny bit when Aunt Bev pushed it open.

“Gen? Are you all right?” she asked, her voice all but trembled.

I wiped my eyes with my shirt sleeve before turning over. “I’m fine. Why does everyone keep asking me that?” I sat up and let my legs dangle off the side of the bed.

“Oh, I don’t know.
Maybe
it was because I came home and found you turned into a giant wolf on top of Joseph. Mary and Abe prepared me as much as they could before you came back, but I have to tell you, Gen, I wasn’t at all prepared for what I saw. As you kids say, ‘it really freaked me out,’” she laughed nervously.

I rolled my eyes and couldn’t help but smile a little thinking about the mental picture she had drawn. “I’m sorry. I thought I had it under control but obviously I don’t.”

Aunt Bev picked up my hair brush from the antique make-up table she’d bought for me and sat on the edge of my bed, gently pulling me closer. She didn’t say anything to cause tears to well in my eyes, but then she didn’t need to. Just her gentle touch, and the fact she smelled like honeysuckle, my mom’s favorite lotion, made the memories of when I was an innocent child come flooding back.

“I can’t believe how long your hair—” she stopped abruptly for a moment, then leaned around to see me and smiled brightly. “Hey … what happened to your curls? Did you straighten your hair or something?”

I smiled, only slightly and shook my head. “Nah. It happened when I, um … when I was in New Mexico.” I didn’t feel comfortable talking with her about it just yet. Hell, I didn’t feel comfortable talking about it with myself yet either.