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Authors: Debbie Macomber

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Nine

“T
he show was great,” Shelly told Jill over coffee Wednesday afternoon. She’d stopped off at PayRite, hoping Jill could get away for lunch. “Even Mark—”

“Mark?” Jill’s coffee cup hit the saucer with a clang. “He went to see
Jersey Boys?

Shelly nodded sheepishly. “I guess I forgot to mention I ran into him, didn’t I? Actually he called me first and since we both had plans to attend the same performance, we decided to go together.”

“Is there anything else you haven’t told me?” Jill’s eyes narrowed astutely.

Shelly tried to hide her uneasiness behind a relaxed shrug, but how well she succeeded in fooling Jill remained to be seen. “We had dinner afterward…as friends. It didn’t mean anything. I did tell you he’s engaged, didn’t I?”

“Unofficially
engaged.” Jill was studying her closely and Shelly felt uneasy under her scrutiny.

“We’ve been friends for a long time,” Jill reminded
her. “I know you, and I know there’s something troubling you.”

Shelly nodded. There was no point in hiding the truth from Jill. Her need to confide in a sympathetic, understanding person was the very reason for her impromptu visit to Jill’s workplace. Lunch had been a convenient excuse.

“You won’t believe this,” Shelly said, cradling the coffee cup in both hands and keeping her gaze lowered. “I can hardly believe it myself.”

“You’re falling in love with Mark.”

Shelly’s eyes shot upward. “It’s that obvious?”

“No,” Jill said softly. “But you look like you’re about to break into tears.”

“If I wasn’t so darn irritated I would. Good grief, think about it. Can you imagine two people less suited to each other? Mark is so…so responsible…”

“So are you.”

“Not in the same way,” Shelly argued. “He’s so sincere and—”

“Shelly, so are you.”

“Perhaps, but I’m such a scatterbrain.” She grimaced as she remembered that was the very word Mark had used. “I’m disorganized and always late and I like to do things my own way. You know that better than most.”

“I prefer to think of you as creative.”

Shelly sent Jill a smile of appreciation. “That’s the reason you’re my best friend. I don’t mind telling you, Jill, I’m worried. Mark Brady may be the Rock of Gibraltar,
but I doubt he’s got an original thought in his head. Everything’s done by the book or according to a schedule.”

“You need someone like Mark in your life,” Jill returned. “Don’t look so shocked. It’s true. The two of you balance each other. He needs you because you’re fun and crazy and imaginative, and you need him because he knows his multiplication tables by heart and will remind you when it’s time for meals.”

“The problem is, Mark’s the type of man who’d expect a woman to
cook
those meals.”

Jill chuckled.

“If the fates are determined to match me up with a man,” Shelly moaned, “couldn’t it be with someone other than an accountant?”

“Apparently not.”

“What really angers me is that I allowed it to happen. The first time he kissed me—”

“He
kissed
you?” Jill feigned a look of horror.

Shelly ignored it. “Yes. Twice. It’s only natural—our being curious about each other, don’t you think?”

“I suppose,” Jill said quickly, no longer teasing. “So tell me what happened.”

“Fireworks bigger than the Fourth of July. I’ve never experienced the feelings I do with Mark, and all because of a kiss.” She paused. “Well, two kisses.”

“And does Mark feel the same thing?”

“I—I can’t speak for him, but I assume it’s equally disturbing for him. He certainly looked as if he’d been taken by surprise.”

“How do you get along with him otherwise?”

“Fine, I guess.” Shelly took a sip of her coffee. “I’m sure I amuse him. But someone like Mark isn’t looking for a woman to entertain him, any more than I’m looking for a man to handle my finances.”

“His opinion of you has mellowed, hasn’t it?” Jill asked, then answered her own question. “There was a time when he thought you were more than a little bizarre, remember?”

Shelly did, all too well. “At first I thought he was totally unexciting, but I’ve altered my opinion of him, too.”

“So what’s the problem?”

“I don’t
want
to fall in love,” Shelly said pointedly. “I’ve got bigger plans for my life than to tie myself down to a committed relationship right now.”

“Then don’t. It shouldn’t be that difficult. Decide what you want and disregard everything else. There’s no law that says you have to fall in love this minute. For that matter, no one can regulate when and who you marry, either. Not even your aunt Milly.”

Jill was saying everything Shelly wanted to hear. Everything she
needed
to hear. But it didn’t make any difference; her heart was already involved. If she could forget she’d ever met Mark, she would. But it was too late. She was in love with him. With Mark, who was in love with someone else. Mark, who saw love and marriage as goals to be achieved within a certain time frame. He’d probably never done anything impulsive in his life.

A relationship between them would never last. If he
wasn’t smart enough to figure that out, she was. Something had to be done and soon, and Shelly knew it would be up to her to do it.

 

Shelly didn’t have long to wait before she saw Mark again. They met at the main branch of the Seattle Public Library on Wednesday evening. She was returning ten overdue books. Six months overdue. The library had sent her three warnings, each progressively less friendly.

She was half-afraid the buzzer inside the library entrance would go off the moment she walked through the hallowed doors, and armed officers would haul her away.

“I wondered when we’d find each other again,” Mark said, strolling up to her at the counter. She’d seen him almost immediately and tried to pretend she hadn’t.

Shelly acknowledged him with a quick nod and ordered her heart to be still. She managed a slight smile. “Hello again,” she said, drawing a checkbook out of her purse. At least she’d come prepared. The fine for the books was sure to be monstrous; in fact, it might be cheaper to buy them.

Mark set the two volumes he was borrowing on the counter. Shelly noted the titles—
Tools for Time Management
and
The State of the Language
, and groaned inwardly. To someone like her accountant friend, these books were probably easy reading. Her own tastes leaned more toward mystery and romance, with a little nonfiction thrown in.

“Have you got time for a cup of coffee?” Mark asked as she wrote out the check to pay her fine.

She was gladdened by the invitation, but knew she had to refuse it. Before he could say or do anything to change her mind, she shook her head. “Not tonight, thanks.”

His smile faded as though her refusal had startled him. “You’re busy?”

She nodded, smiling at the librarian as she handed over her check. The librarian smiled back. It had been a civilized exchange, Shelly thought, and her library card had’t been confiscated, despite her transgressions.

“You’ve got a date waiting for you?”

It took Shelly a second to understand that Mark was referring to her refusal to join him for coffee.

“Not exactly.” She turned away from the counter and headed toward the exit. To her surprise Mark followed her outside.

“Something’s wrong,” he said, standing at the top of the steps.

She stopped her descent and stood below him, looking up. Pretense had never suited Shelly; she was too innately honest to hide her feelings. “Mark, I think you’re a very nice man—”

“But you don’t want to marry me,” he concluded for her. “I’ve heard that line before, remember? Actually, half the mall heard it, too.”

“I’ve already apologized for that. It’s just that…all
right, if you must know, I’m beginning to like you…really like you, and frankly that terrifies me.”

Her candid response seemed to unnerve him. He frowned and rubbed the side of his jaw. “I know what you mean. I’m beginning to like you, too.”

“See!” she cried, raising both hands. “If we don’t take care of this now, heaven only knows what could happen. It has the potential of ruining both our lives. We’re mature adults, aren’t we?” At the moment, though, she felt singularly lacking in maturity.

All her senses were clamoring, telling her to enjoy their brief time together, despite the consequences. It was what her heart wanted, but she couldn’t allow her life to be ruled by her heart. Not when it came to Mark.

“Liking each other doesn’t have to be a federal crime,” he said, advancing one step toward her.

“You’re right, of course, but I know myself too well. I could easily fall in love with you, Mark.” She didn’t dare admit she already had. “Before we knew it, we’d be spending more and more time with each other. We might even become seriously involved.”

He remained suspiciously silent.

“You’re a wonderful man. If my mother were to meet you she’d be shouting from the rooftops, she’d be so thrilled. For a while I might convince myself that we could really make something of this relationship. I might even consider taking cooking classes because you’re the kind of man who’d expect a woman to know how to make a roast and mashed potatoes.”

“It’d probably come in handy someday,” he said.

“That’s what I thought,” she murmured, disheartened. “I’m not a traditional woman. I never will be. The only time I ever baked a pie I ended up throwing it in the garbage disposal—and it broke the disposal.”

“A pie ruined your garbage disposal?” Mark repeated, then shook his head. “Never mind, don’t bother explaining. It seems to me you’re getting ahead of yourself here. You’re talking as though coffee together means a lifetime commitment.”

Shelly wasn’t listening. “What about Janice?” she demanded.
“She’s
the one you should be inviting to coffee, not me.”

“What’s Janice got to do with this?” he asked impatiently.

“Janice,” Shelly snapped, her own temper short. “The woman you’ve decided to marry. Remember her? The love of your life? The woman you’re unofficially engaged to marry.”

“It’s not unofficial anymore,” Mark explained evenly.

“Oh, great, you’re taking me out to dinner, kissing me and at the same time picking out engagement rings with another woman.” She had to admit he’d never lied to her about his relationship with the faceless Janice. He’d been forthright about it from the beginning. But it hurt, really hurt, to learn that he was going ahead with his plans to marry Janice.

He was about to speak, but she forestalled him, strug
gling to force some enthusiasm into her voice. “Congratulations are in order. I wish you both the very best.” With that she turned and bounded down the stairs, taking them recklessly fast.

“Shelly!”

She could hear Mark calling after her, but she ignored him, desperate to get away before the lump in her throat made it impossible to breathe. Tears had formed in her eyes and she cursed herself for being so ridiculous, for caring so much. Her vision blurred and she wiped a hand across her face, furious at her lack of control. This marriage was what she’d hoped would happen. What she wanted for Mark.
Wasn’t it?

“Shelly, for heaven’s sake, will you wait?”

When she reached the bottom of the steps, Shelly moved into a side street, hoping to disappear in the crowd, praying Mark wouldn’t pursue her.

She thought she’d escaped until a hand on her shoulder whirled her around.

“Shelly, please listen,” Mark pleaded breathlessly, his shoulders heaving. “The engagement isn’t official because there is no engagement. How could I possibly marry Janice after meeting you?”

Ten

“Y
ou broke off your engagement with Janice?” Shelly demanded furiously. Something inside, some reservoir of emotion, had burst wide-open. “You fool,” she shouted. “You idiot!” Her eyes brimmed with tears, and deep in her heart she felt the stirrings of glad excitement. “That was the worst thing you could’ve done!”

“No,” he said. “It was the smartest.”

“How can you say that?” she wailed.

“Shelly?”

He reached for her as though to offer comfort, but Shelly jerked away and stepped back, freeing herself from his grasp. “Janice was perfect for you,” she lamented.

“How do you know that?” he asked calmly and much too reasonably to suit Shelly. “You never met her.”

“I didn’t need to. I know she was right for you. You’d never have asked her to marry you if she wasn’t.”

“Janice is a wonderful woman and she’ll make some man a good wife, but it won’t be me.”

“You’re crazy to break off your engagement. Crazy!”

“No, I’m not,” Mark returned confidently. “I’m absolutely certain I did the right thing. Do you know why?”

Shelly could only shake her head, wiping away the tears with the back of her hand. She was ecstatic—and yet she was so frightened. She loved him; she was sure of it. Then why had everything become so difficult and confused?

“What you said about love the other day changed my mind.”

“You
listened
to me?” she cried in real horror. “Do I look like an expert on love? I’ve never been in love in my life!” Not counting what she felt for him, of course. She’d always thought love would clarify her life, not make it more complicated.

Mark paid no attention to her outburst. “You helped me understand that I was marrying Janice for the wrong reasons. I’d decided it was time to settle down. Janice had come to the same conclusion. She’s thirty and figured if she was going to marry and have a family, the time was now. It wasn’t a love match, and we both knew it.”

“This is none of my business,” Shelly said, frantically shaking her head as if to chase the words away. “I don’t want to hear it.”

“You
are
going to hear it,” Mark insisted, clasping her elbows and gently drawing her closer. “You claimed people shouldn’t plan love. It should take them by surprise, you said, and you were right. Janice and I are fond of each other, but—”

“There’s nothing wrong with fond!”

His eyes widened. “No, there isn’t,” he agreed, “but Janice isn’t a zany producer. I like spending time with you. I’ve come to realize there’s a certain thrill in expecting the unexpected. Every minute with you is an adventure.”

“A relationship between us would never last,” Shelly insisted, drawing on the most sensible argument. “It would be fine for a while, but then we’d drift apart. We’d have to. In case you haven’t noticed, we’re nothing alike.”

“Why wouldn’t a relationship last?” Mark asked patiently.

“For all the reasons I listed before!” Mark was so endearing, and he was saying all the words she’d secretly longed to hear, but nothing could change the fundamental differences between them.

“So you aren’t as adept in the kitchen as some women. I’m a fair cook.”

“It’s more than that.”

“Of course it is,” he concurred. “But there’s nothing we can’t overcome if we’re willing to work together.”

“You know what I think it is?” she said desperately, running her splayed fingers through her hair. “You’re beginning to believe there’s magic in Aunt Milly’s wedding dress.”

“Don’t you?”

“No,” she cried. “Not anymore. I did when I was a little girl…I loved the story of how Aunt Milly met Uncle John, but I’m not a child anymore, and what seemed so romantic then just seems unrealistic now.”

“Shelly,” Mark said in exasperation. “We don’t need to do anything right away. All I’m suggesting is we give this thing between us a chance.”

“There’s nothing between us,” she denied vehemently.

Mark’s eyes narrowed. “You don’t honestly believe that, do you?”

“Yes,” she lied. “You’re a nice guy, but—”

“If I hear any more of this nice-guy stuff I’m going to kiss you and we both know what’ll happen then.”

His gaze lowered to her mouth and she unconsciously moistened her lips with anticipation.

“I just might, anyway.”

“No.” The threat was real enough to make her retreat a couple of steps. If Mark kissed her, Shelly knew she’d be listening to her heart and not her head. And then
he’d
know… “That’s what I thought.” His grin was downright boyish.

“I think we should both forget we ever met,” she suggested next, aware even as she said it how ludicrous she sounded. Mark Brady had indelibly marked her life and no matter how much she denied it, she’d never forget him.

“Don’t you remember that you threw yourself into my arms?
You
can conveniently choose to overlook the obvious, but unfortunately that won’t work for me. I’m falling in love with you, Shelly.”

She opened her mouth to argue that he couldn’t possibly love her—not yet, not on such short acquaintance—but he pressed his finger to her lips, silencing her.

“At first I wasn’t keen on the idea,” he admitted, “but
it’s sort of grown on me since. I can see us ten years in the future and you know what? It’s a pleasant picture. We’re going to be very happy together.”

“I need to think!” She placed her hands on either side of her head. Everything was happening much too quickly; she actually felt dizzy. “We’ll leave it to fate…how does that sound?” she offered excitedly. It seemed like the perfect solution. “The next time we bump into each other, I’ll have more of a grasp on my feelings. I’ll know what we should do.” She might also hibernate inside her apartment for a month, but she wasn’t mentioning that.

“Nope.” Mark slowly shook his head. “That won’t work.”

“Why not?” she asked. “We bump into each other practically every day.”

“No, we don’t.”

He wasn’t making any sense.


Jersey Boys
was a setup,” he informed her. “I made sure we bumped into each other there.”

“How? When?”

“The day at the beach I saw the ticket sticking out of your purse. Our meeting at the theater wasn’t any accident.”

Mark couldn’t have shocked her more if he’d announced he was an alien from outer space. For the first time in recent memory, she was left speechless. “Tonight?” she asked when she could get the words out. “The library?”

“I’d decided to stop off at your apartment. I was prepared to make up some story about the wedding dress luring me into your building, but when I drove past, I saw you coming down the front steps loaded down with library books. It wasn’t hard to figure out where you were headed. I found a parking space and waited for you inside.”

“What about…the IRS office and the beach?” She didn’t know how he’d managed
those
meetings.

Mark shook his head again and grinned. “Coincidence, unless you had anything to do with them. You didn’t, did you?”

“Absolutely not,” she replied indignantly.

Still grinning, he said, “I didn’t really think you had.”

Shelly started walking, her destination unclear. She felt too restless to continue standing there; unfortunately the one action that truly appealed to her was leaping into his arms.

Mark matched his own steps to hers.

“It’s Aunt Milly’s wedding dress, I know it is,” Shelly mumbled under her breath. She’d tried to bring up the subject, but Mark had refused to listen. “You broke off an engagement because you believe fate’s somehow thrown us together.”

“No, Shelly, the dress doesn’t have anything to do with how I feel,” Mark said calmly.

“But you’d already decided to marry someone else!”

“I’m choosing my own destiny, which is to spend the rest of my life with you.”

“You might have consulted me first. I have no intention of getting married…not for years and years.”

“I’ll wait.”

“You can’t do that,” she cried. He didn’t understand because he was too respectable and adorable and too much of a gentleman. The only thing that would work would be to heartlessly send him away.

She faced Mark, careful to wear just the right expression of remorse and regret. “This is all very flattering, but I don’t love you. I’m sorry, Mark. You’re the last person in the world I want to hurt.”

For a moment Mark said nothing, then he shrugged and looked away. “You can’t be any more direct than that, can you? There’s no chance you’ll ever fall in love with me?”

“None.” Her breath fell harshly, painfully, from her lips. It shouldn’t hurt this much to do the right thing. It shouldn’t hurt to be noble. “You’re very nice, but…”

“So you’ve said before.”

Falteringly, as though the movement caused him pain, he lifted his hand to her face, his fingers caressing the curve of her jaw.

Until that moment, Shelly hadn’t understood how fiercely proud Mark was. He could have dealt with every argument, calmed every doubt, answered every question, but there was nothing he could say when she denied all feeling for him.

“You mean it, don’t you?” he asked huskily. He was standing so close that his breath warmed her face.

Shelly had schooled her features to reveal none of her
clamoring emotions. His touch, so light, so potent, seemed to clog her throat with anguish, and she couldn’t speak.

“If that’s what you want—” he dropped his hand abruptly “—I won’t trouble you again.” With those words, he turned and walked away. Before she fully realized what he intended, Mark had disappeared around a corner.

“You let him go, you idiot!” she whispered to herself. A tear escaped and she smeared it across her cheek.

Mark meant what he’d said about not bothering her. He was a man of his word. He’d never try to see her again—and if they did happen upon each other, he’d pretend he didn’t know her.

He might eventually decide to marry Janice. Hadn’t he admitted he was fond of the other woman?

Shelly’s heart clutched painfully inside her chest. Before she could stop herself, before she could question the wisdom of her actions, she ran after Mark.

She turned the corner and was halfway down the block when she realized he wasn’t anywhere to be seen. She came to a skidding halt, then whirled around, wondering how he could possibly have gotten so far in such a short time.

Mark stepped out from the side of a building, hands on his hips, a cocky, jubilant smile on his face. “What took you so long?” he asked, holding out his arms.

Shelly didn’t need a second invitation to throw herself into his embrace. His mouth feasted on hers, his kiss hungry and demanding, filled with enough emotion to last a lifetime.

Shelly slid her arms around his neck and stood on her tiptoes, giving herself completely to his kiss, to his love. All that mattered was being in his arms—exactly where she was supposed to be.

“I take it this means you love me, too?” he whispered close to her ear. His voice was rough with emotion.

Shelly nodded. “I’m so afraid.”

“Don’t be. I’m confident enough for both of us.”

“This is crazy,” she said, but she couldn’t have moved out of his arms for the world. Breathing deeply, she buried her face in his chest.

“But it’s a good kind of crazy.”

“Aunt Milly saw us together in her dream. She wrote to me about a tall, blue-eyed man.”

“Who knows if it was me or not?” Mark whispered into her hair and brushed his lips over her temple. “Who cares? If fate had anything to do with me finding you or if your aunt Milly’s wedding dress is responsible, I can’t say. Personally, I couldn’t care less. I love you, Shelly, and I believe you love me, too.”

She glanced up at this man who had altered the course of her life and smiled, her heart too full for words. “I do love you,” she said when she could. “An accountant! In a suit! Hardly the husband I imagined for myself.”

Mark chuckled. “I would never have guessed I’d fall head over heels in love with a woman who wears the type of clothes you do—but I did.”

“I love you, too,” Shelly said and closed her eyes.

 

The morning of her wedding day, Shelly couldn’t sit still. Her mother was even worse, pacing in front of her, dabbing her eyes and sniffling.

“I can’t believe my baby’s getting married.”

Shelly had to restrain herself from reminding her dear mother that less than a month before, she’d been desperate to marry her daughter off. Thank goodness Jill was there. Without her best friend to reassure her, Shelly didn’t know what she would’ve done. While her mother fussed with the caterers, complained to the florists and fretted about who had a key to the kitchen in the reception hall, Jill led Shelly upstairs to her childhood bedroom and helped her dress. When Shelly was finished, Jill stood back to examine her.

“Well?” Shelly asked, smoothing her hand down the antique dress, loving the feel of the satin and lace against her fingers. It was probably her imagination but now that she was wearing the dress, really wearing it, she could almost feel its magic.

Tears gathered in Jill’s eyes as she stared at her friend.

“That bad?” Shelly teased.

Jill pressed her fingers to her lips. “You’re beautiful,” she whispered. “Mark isn’t going to believe his eyes when he sees you.”

“Do you really think so?” Shelly hated sounding so insecure, but she wanted everything to be perfect today. She was crazy in love—and crazy enough to give her
mother free rein planning her wedding. Crazy enough to go through with a formal wedding in the first place. If it’d been up to her, they would’ve eloped weeks ago. But Mark had wanted a proper wedding and her mother certainly wasn’t going to be cheated out of this moment. So Shelly had gone along with it.

Mark and her mother had defeated most of her ideas. She’d wanted to hire clowns to entertain at the reception, but her mother didn’t seem to think that was a good idea.

Shelly had never been that fond of white wedding cake, either. She’d suggested Cherries Jubilee instead, but Mark was afraid something might catch on fire and so in the interests of safety, Shelly had agreed to a traditional cake, decorated with pink roses.

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